BFFs Navigating the Middle School Social Scene Cathi Cohen LCSW, CGP Director – In Step ...
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BFFs Navigating the Middle School Social Scene Cathi Cohen LCSW, CGP Director – In Step www.insteppc.com 703-876-8480 Email: [email protected]
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Transcript of BFFs Navigating the Middle School Social Scene Cathi Cohen LCSW, CGP Director – In Step ...
BFFsNavigating the Middle
School Social Scene
Cathi Cohen LCSW, CGPDirector – In Stepwww.insteppc.com703-876-8480Email: [email protected]
MiddleSchooler
Hormones
Selfdoubts
Popularity
Power ControlSeparation
Individuation
FittingIn
Bullying
What You See The Downside Self-absorption
Girls fight; Boys withdraw
Moodiness
Push and pull
Inside = Self-doubtsOutside = Know it all
What You Also See The Upside Empathy
Perspective-taking
Abstract thinking
Independence
Resilience
What You Also See The Upside Empathy
Perspective-taking
Abstract thinking
Independence
Resilience
The Middle School Social Jungle
Birds of a Feather Flock Together
Jockeying for Position
Pops vs. Non-Pops
Pro-Social Popular• Helpful• Affiliative• Comfortable with their social status• Academically engaged• Well-liked• Optimistic• Good social skills
Populistic• Popular but NOT well-liked• Relationally aggressive• Academically disengaged• Influential• Arrogant• Bullies or henchman
Socially rejected Rejected Aggressor/Victim
•Low social status•Bully to defend•Reactive to perceived threats•Easily angered•Rule breaking
Rejected Victim
•Low social status•Sensitive and reactive•Interpret social cues inaccurately
Neglected• Shy• Anxious• Withdrawn• Insecure• Invisible• Remain on the periphery
Floater• Moderate social status• Comfortable with self and others• Quality friendships• Move easily among different groups
What’s a Parent To Do?
You Influence More Than You Think
Get Used to Entering Through
the Side Door
#1 Show By Example
#2 Socialize Them
#3 Encourage extra- curricular interests
Keep in Mind…..
If your teen is happy all the time, you are working
too hard.
Kids aren’t seeking your
advice
They are seeking your
belief in them
“ When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” Mark Twain
Get Help When……
Cathi Cohen LCSWDirector In Stepwww.insteppc.com703-876-8480Facebook: Raise Your Child’s Social IQ
