Bad Attitude Bm

8/13/2019 Bad Attitude Bm

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Although somehow closely associated with each other, I think we first have to distinguish thedifferences between Negativity, Criticism, Demoralization and Bad Attitude!

Taking the latter first:-

Bad AttitudeAn Attitude can be defined as your expression orperspective towards a thing, person or place. Badattitude is the tendency of always having negativeexpressions towards a person, a thing or a place.

Do you recall any of the following? Most of theemployees at work during the last months had toendure the Bad Attitude problem that existed withthe then Team Leader and/or supervisors.

1. Always assuming that there is somethingwrong with other people, and never himself - i.e. if there's a problem, it's their faultnot his.

2. Being completely unwilling to behave in a way that might actually help to solve orimprove a bad or unhappy situation.

3. Being completely apathetic, uncaring and/or inconsiderate about the feelings of othersor the effect of one's behaviour on others.

Maybe an overall definition could be: - being part of the problem instead of part of thesolution.

There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The littledifference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.

And so we come to Negativity!1. Expressing, containing, or consisting of a negation, refusal, or denial.

2. Indicating opposition or resistance.3. Lacking positive or constructive features.4. Unpleasant; disagreeable.5. Unfavourable or detrimental.6. Hostile or disparaging.

If you claim that I am negative? In respect to what and by whom? Have you ever come on ashift or left a shift where I was peeved off, fuming, enraged or whatever? I might havecriticized a situation, even a customer (not direct), but not in a negative tense but one tosolve a solution or make aware of a problem for future reference.

Maybe, because I dont show the enthusiasm toward charities (GHOSCC) as you and someother team members do, you regard this as a negative demeanour.


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Not being exuberant, fanatical or passionate about any charities is my prerogative and isbased on my personal past experiences with some charity organizations. If you want to knowwhy, I have attached a couple of PDF files that cover my point of views about why I amtotally against charity organizations. The only comment I have, which might be considerednot very P.C.ness or even malicious in the view of many is How many years was he involvedin charity work, even got an OBE and Knighthood, and what do the Mr & Mrs General Publicthink of Jimmy Saville today?

Have you ever met Debbie Downer, Negative Nancy or Pessimistic Patty? These people can

be so entrenched in the bad things that there isnt any room for good things to grow. Theyinhabit our families and social circles. It can be emotionally draining just being around them,and you must be careful because their attitudes are contagious. Negativity perpetuatesitself, breeds dissatisfaction and clutters the mind. And when the mind is cluttered withnegativity, happiness is much harder to come by.

Here are some ways that I have learnt to defend myself against negativity:

Dont take other peoples negativity personally. Most negative people behavenegatively not just to you, but to everyone they interact with. What they say and dois a projection of their own reality their own attitude. Even when a situation seems

personal even if someone insults you directly it oftentimes has nothing to do withyou. Remember, what others say and do, and the opinions they have, are basedentirely on their own self-reflection.

Spend more time with positive people. You are the average of the people you spendthe most time with. In other words, who you spend your time with has a great impacton the person you eventually become. If you are around cynical and negative peopleall the time, you will become cynical and negative. Does who you are and who youwant to be reflect in the company you keep? Start spending time with nice peoplewho are smart, driven and likeminded. Relationships should help you, not hurt you.Surround yourself with people who reflect the person you want to be. Choose friends

who you are proud to know, people you admire, who love and respect you, andpeople who make your day a little brighter simply by being in it.

Be the positivity you want to see in the world. Lead by example. You cant alwayssave the world, but you can make the world a better place by practicing what youpreach by becoming self-aware, tapping into your compassion, and protecting yourpositive space. Doing simple things like talking about positive daily events, commonfriends, hobbies, happy news, make for light conversations with negative people.Keep the conversations focused on optimistic areas the person can relate to. You candisarm their negativity, even if its just for a little while.

Change the way you think. The one thing nobody can take away from you is the wayyou choose to respond to what others say and do. The problem isnt the events thatare negative. The problem is the way you react to those events. The last of your


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freedoms is to choose your attitude in any given circumstance. Complaining, blamingand criticizing arent going to change the situation. It is not always easy to findhappiness in ourselves, but it is always impossible to find it elsewhere. Regardless ofthe situation you face, your attitude is your choice. Remember, you cant have apositive life with a negative attitude. When negativity controls your thoughts, it limitsyour behaviour, actions, and opportunities. If you realized how powerful yourthoughts were, you would never think another negative thought again.

Focus on solutions. Negative people have an endless supply of pity party invitations.

Dont RSVP. Oftentimes people use negativity as a barrier to protect themselves fromthe world, which in turn blocks them from solutions that could improve their life.Instead, identify solutions. Dont dwell too much on what went wrong. Instead, focuson the next positive step. Spend your energy on moving forward toward a positiveresolution. Remember, when you focus on solutions, by thinking and acting positively,sound becomes music, movement becomes dance, a smile becomes laughter, and lifebecomes a celebration.

Love whoever is around to be loved. Practice acts of kindness. Its a lot harder to benegative when youre in the presence of love and kindness. Be that presencewhenever possible. Let your guard down. Talk to someone you dont know straight

from your heart. Compliment them. Dont anticipate awkwardness. Just be you inthat beautiful way only you know, and give them the chance to smile and connectwith you. Sometimes a kind word and some attention from a friend is all thatsneeded to turn a negative attitude around.

Provide support when it makes sense. Some people complain as a way of crying forhelp. They may not be conscious of it though, so their comments come across asnegative complaints rather than requests. Show some concern. Just a simple Areyou okay? or Is there anything I can do to help you? can do wonders. Resist theurge to judge or assume. Its hard to offer compassion when you assume you havethem figured out. Let them know they are not alone. People overcome the forces ofnegative emotions, like anger and hatred, when the counter-forces of love andsupport are in full effect.

Realize that life is a series of ups and downs. Acknowledge the negativity, accept it,and let it pass through your consciousness, thereby teaching you a lesson but notruining your day. Life is full of highs and lows, but you dont have to go up and downwith them. We develop from the negatives when we accept them and learn fromthem. This cycle is all part of the human experience. Relax, let go a little, and enjoythe ride.

Concentrate on today. Too often, we carry around things from our past that hurt us regrets, shame, anger, pain, etc. Holding onto anger is like drinking poison andexpecting the other person to die. Dont let these negative points from the past robyour present happiness. You had to live though these things in the past, and


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although unfortunate, they cant be changed. But if the only place they live today is inyour mind, then let go, move on, and be happy. You can decide right now thatnegative experiences from your past will not predict your future.

Let go and move on when you must. If all else fails, remove yourself from the wrongsituations and relationships. Some people are like dark clouds; when they disappear,its a brighter day. Know when its time to let go. Letting go of negative peopledoesnt mean you hate them, it just means that you care about your own wellbeing.Every time you subtract negative from your life, you make room for more positive.

So how you or anyone else claims that myviews are negative is actually beyondcomprehension. However, saying all that Imight be using some negative words at workwithout knowing it. I might also be puttingdown the company or some of its proceduresor management decisions, or I may bedemonstrating some negative body gesturesor facial expressions, or my voice may have anegative tone. But in all honesty I am not

aware that Im coming across as negative. Ihave always believed that telling the truth isbetter.

I also think if someone has a problem with the truth, then they should have the courage toconfront me with it and not hind behind a third party, which unfortunately has now becomethe standard at many firms.

For example, if I had to introduce a new process within my group that I disagree with andknow that my group also disagrees with; hiding my view from the group is the lie. Whenpeople eventually find out the truth about what I originally thought (which happens nine out

of ten times), they are likely to become even more negative about this process. Therefore ifbeing honest and telling the truth creates negativity, is it better to lie? I dont think so!

I am part of a team, and as a team player I do eventually support the decision, but it wouldbe more advantageous if everyone concerned had the explanation and time on theWHY,WHAT, HOW, WHO AND WHEN?

However, when it comes to criticism and that I am sometimes VERY critical about certainevents, things and actions taking place is actually another theme and one I will admit too assomething I tend to do rather frequently.

Criticism is the application of judgment through evaluation, resulting in either positive ornegative feedback for a receiving part. Presenting negative feedback may not be easy, but isa hallmark of solid pedagogy and maintenance of interpersonal relations.


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Constructive criticism is productive in that it aids the work of the person who is subject tocriticism to address the shortcomings of the work.

Non-constructive criticism is characterized by an absence ofconstructive criticism. Non-constructive criticism presents negativefeedback by pointing out what is wrong.

Consider what has been said. In contrast to constructive criticism, non-constructive criticism does not offer any advice on how to improve thenegative aspects of the work that is subject to criticism.

In the case with untrained supervisors, I tried to focus on the problem,not on the persons personality.

Yes I disliked certain persons and have had no respect for them as a Supervisor or TeamLeader because of the way they treated the female and younger employees, their blameculture, their underhanded and deceitful actions towards not only employees, but customersas well. So yes - I did criticize some actions, but not only too the members of staff but totheir face as well.

Here's a question guaranteed to make your stomach lurch: "Would you mind if I gave you

some feedback?"

What that actually means is "Would you mind if I gave you some negative feedback,wrapped in the guise of constructive criticism, whether you want it or not?"

The problem with criticism is that it challenges our sense of value. Criticism implies judgmentand we all recoil from feeling judged. Criticism is a threat to our esteem in the eyes of othersis so potent they can literally feel like threats to our very survival.

The conundrum is that feedback is necessary. It's the primary means by which we learn andgrow. So what's the best way to deliver it in a way that it provides the greatest value

meaning the recipient truly absorbs and acts on it?

There are three key behaviours, I believe, and they're each grounded in the recognition thatwhat we say is often less important than how we say it.

The first mistake we often make is giving feedback when we are feeling that our own value isat risk. That's a recipe for disaster, and it happens far more commonly than we think, or areaware.

If we're feeling threatened or diminished by another person's perceived shortcomings,providing "constructive criticism" becomes secondary to getting our value back. We're more

likely to be reactive, insensitive and even hurtful.


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If it's about us, it's not truly about them. Any time we provide feedback with the goal ofgetting someone to better meet our needs, rather than being responsive to theirs, it'sunlikely to prompt the desired outcome.

The second mistake we make in giving feedback is failing to hold the other person's value inthe process. Even the most well-intentioned criticism will, more often than not, prompt us tofeel our value is at risk, and under attack.

The third mistake we make is to assume that we're right about whatever it is we're inclinedto say. Like lawyers, we take a series of facts and weave them together into a story thatsupports and justifies the case we're seeking to make.

Additionally I think keep your self-esteem proportional. Don't have it too high or too low foryourself. If it is too low, you will be sensitive to criticism because it reminds you how bad youthink you are. If it is too high, you will get angry at people and be disappointed of yourself.It may be difficult to maintain this balance. Just keep reminding yourself that "I am what iam and i am true to myself. I am not a perfect person but at the same time i do possessome talent".

Tell people to give constructive criticism to you. It doesn't hurt as much when you tell peopleto.

Correct what they are criticising, or they will see you as stubborn or annoying.

Try to improve. It may sound like a clich but this is what you can do. There is no point inmulling over those words. Look beyond the 'words'. Take it in good spirit. Make an effort toeradicate those negatives.

Its a part of life. It is very important that you know that you cannot escape criticism. Themore success you will find the harsher will be the criticism. Take a look at all the famouspeople; there are millions who criticize them. They always take it in good spirit and maybethat's why they are successful. No matter what you do there will always be people who will

praise as well as criticize you. Nothing is perfect.

I just roll my eyes when I see a company requesting: -Please consider the environment anddont print this email unless you really need to or switch off the electrical equipments and/orlights etc..And then walk into a warehouse and see the wastage not to mention thedamage, not only on paper products, but food stuff and materials.

I now understand why there is a hike of astronomical overhead costs in products which hastaken place in many retail outlets, the management blame it on shop-lifting and logistics,when actually it is due to the neglect and inadequate standards in place to protect goods;the blame (IMHO) is the incompetence and lack of training to whoever is in control.


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Now with the question and answers about demoralization!

And again, even you must agree that theMorales of the team in retail are very low, ifnot at the lowest for many years.

Team Leaders/Supervisors seem to onlyhave the following agendas: -

To undermine the confidence or

morale of the team To put into disorder the team To debase the morals of the team

Demoralized workers are bad for a company's productivity levels and the quality of clientservice. Low employee morale can result from a variety of sources, including from the actionsof management as well as the example superiors choose to set for lower-level workers. Aclose examination of the workplace is necessary to determine how business strategies andmanagement actions are affecting employee morale.

1. Lack of Workplace Trust Workplace relationships between employees and management personnel are

built primarily on trust. Employees may display low morale and a general air ofdemoralization when management treats them like tools and not people withvaluable opinions and perspectives on the tasks at hand. Emotionallydisengaged employees who feel manipulated by this management strategywon't work as hard for the business and may produce a lower quality of workor simply take longer to complete tasks.

2. Lack of Upward Mobility

A mail-room clerk who knows he's never ascending through the company'sranks and out of the lowest level will only work so hard to keep his job. Anorganizational culture that lacks a means for workers to be upwardly mobileand earn promotions through hard work can demoralize the staff as theseemployees watch executives and management personnel enjoy lucrativebenefits and perks while the work of lower-level employees goes unrewarded.

A lack of upward mobility also shows a disconnect between the expectations ofmanagement and the example these personnel set for lower-level employees.

3. Department Infighting

Infighting among team members can drag department morale down anddemoralize workers on the receiving end of workplace harassment.Management must be proactive in confronting instances of harassment in theworkplace and immediately discipline workers guilty of committing such acts.


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Management and ownership that permit a culture of harassment to permeatethe workplace can cause worker morale to slip even further. They may evenincur civil liability if affected employees choose to sue for creating a workplacewhere harassment can thrive.

4. Micromanaging Employee Jobs Monitoring employees is an acceptable means of controlling product quality, but

watching workers too closely can shake employee confidence and weakenmorale. Micromanaging occurs when management or ownership question and

critique worker performance at every turn -- even simple tasks.Micromanagement causes workers to fear unrealistic retribution for failing toperform up to an invisible standard. Setting clear expectations for workerperformance and allowing these employees to engage in tasks withoutimmediate critique can help keep morale steady and avoid demoralizing theworkforce as a whole.

Another reason is that the majority of people who findthemselves in a management position have been promotedthere for something other than their team management orleadership skills (even where these behavioural competenciesare assessed during recruitment). Very few have a natural flairfor working with people. Some of them improve. Many do not.

And organisations who invest in L&D that would improve theseskills reward other behaviours first.

My experiences in the past and my last employment haveshown that this form of malpractice is very, very commonthroughout the western hemisphere workforce.

The bizarre thing is that this kind of leadership often leads to

projects running late, over budget and with very unhappy users. But for reasons that arebeyond me, they are allowed to blame the developers and carry on regardless. Users inthese organisations often just accept that how it is in the head quarters??????

Very frustrating or should I say demoralization; and I would like to add that much of theleadership seems to be based on the level of confident assertion used rather than on thefacts.

How to Demoralize Staff and Lose Talented People.

Maybe a brief guide to management mal-practice is required?

I am not a management consultant but I often hear stories from people who are feelingdemoralized by management practices that frustrate, exasperate, infuriate, disempoweredand ultimately de-motivates them. When this happens, formerly enthusiastic, dedicated,


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