Anas, The Poem of Mutilation

8/12/2019 Anas, The Poem of Mutilation

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Anas,The Poem of

Mutilation Story by Igor Pop Trajkov

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Igor P op T rajkov |ANAS, THE POEM OF MUTILATION 1

ANAS, THE POEM OF MUTILATION

She was born in the small city in the middle of the Balkan Peninsula. She had her

childhood in the small city. She moved in the big city together with her parents. She began

her primary education in the big city. She was a girl from the big city. Her name was Ana.

Ana was a lucky child. Unlike many of her girlfriends , she wasn t a child of divorced

parents. Unlike many of her girlfriends she didn t have to starve. Her parents were well

satiated, so always in her mandja 1 she had plenty of meat. Unlike many of her girlfriends

she didn t have to walk the dangerous streets in order to go to school. Her parents had a

car. Unlike many of her girlfriends she didn t have to talk to everybody. Her parents taught

her that they were important people, so she should choose with whom she talks to. Due to

this, at her first day in school, she felt kind of lonely. She thought she missed so many

things. While many of the girls were playing together in the yard, she was sitting in the

classroom, staring at the wall, waiting for the break to pass. This was pretty hard for her;

how was somebody at her age supposed to find out who s good, and who s not? Ana thought

that it is normal for her to think that all the people were the same, although at the time

when she was going to school nobody paid attention to her religious upbringing. She knew

nothing of Christianity. That nobody is something more than the others; so certainlynobody is superior. But after few days her classmates first begun strangely to stare at her,

than they begun to yell and insult her. Ass girl, donkey face. Why don t you move from

your sit a bit? Your heard had left you, you are all alone you stinky cow? When this begun

to happen she decided it would be the best for her not to pay any attention to them and she

would kindly open some book and begun to read. Though it only looked as she was reading,

her thoughts were disturbed by the situation, so she couldn t focus on the text. Ana thought

her face was like a helmet, and the reading mask would protect her from her surrounding.

She told nobody of this. Why? Because she thought her parents worked really hard for herwealth, so she shouldn t bother them with this tiny problem. She told nothing of this to her

mistress too, she thought a girl with her upbringing should be clever enough to solve this

1 Very popular meal in Southern Balkan, especially in Macedonia. It exists in hundreds of versions.

Usually is from boiled seasons vegetables, and it can contain any kind of meat. Some think theetymology is from the ancient Tal tribes that inherited the region. Later researches show that it mayoriginate from Mandjuria. This meal was carried in the clay bottle on the horse.


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all by herself. She should just keep on being the nice girl, and the evil spirits would

disappear. Her homework was always the best, so she always read her homework in front of

everybody. Ana always kept her books and notebooks tidy; she always had the curls in her

blond hair freshly washed; her dress never had wrinkles, as she always sat on her chair

slowly and elegantly as her French teacher taught her (with whom she learned and how to

drink tea, with elegance in moving the couple- like a little lady). But the girls kept on

attacking her. Furthermore they took with them few boys and told them to attack her with

false insinuations . Why don t you join us in the yard? Because you are a provincial bastard,

you are ashamed to mix with the normal people ! they kept on yelling at her. When the

boys saw that she pays no attention to them, they decided to force her into it by throwing at

her dirty water from the sponge. When she saw that her dress is all stained with that dirty

water, Ana decided it is top time to inform the mistress about this. She didn t want her

mother to think that she didn t keep her dress all tidy. In a hurry she stood from the chair,

but immediately she sensed something cold between her lags. It was a stick from a flag that

one of the boys placed holding it in his hands, where definitely it shouldn t be. Eat this,

provincial whore! yelled the boy that had oily, straight black hair, and his blue eyes bloody

red of anger. Ana just pulled the stick that he was holding out in her way, and then pulled

the boy too. This was easy for her as she was taller than the boy. She stepped in cold blood

in the corridor, and begun walking straight towards hers mistress office. After only fewsteps, Ana felt as losing her balance, and failed down at her back. She hit her head so hard

that at the beginning she thought she had broken her head. As she pulled herself together,

she stood on her own two feet again, and heard the laughing of her classmates behind her

back. Obviously they expected she would come out of the classroom and they threw some oil

on the floor . Haven t you broke your neck already you provincial cow? her mates keep on

yelling at her. When entering the office, Ana was bursting into tears, and through crying

she kept on saying look what they did to me. She showed with her princess looking fingers

at her now dirty dress. The mistress hugged her and put her fingers in her silky, curly hair.Who did this to you Ana? Wh y did they do this to you? Ana felt quite fatigue and she

couldn t answer anything. The mistress promised to her, and later to her parents that they

will examine carefully this incident, and punish the perpetrators. When her parents asked

her, she told them everything about the attack as it was. The mother was particularly

tender with her daughter; she was hugging and kissing her sugar cube all evening. Later


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her mother washed her in the foamy tab, and all wrapped by the smells of the lavender

soap and her mother s perfume, Ana went to be d. Like every night Ana stared at the toy

chandelier in a form of Donald the Duck, and the other toys and dolls that were hiding in

the shades of the room. Then she saw like some form of a fairy glow through the window.

She thought that the good fairy had come to her in order to spend some time with her- Ana,

the sugar cube. Then she hear d some kind of explosion. Mommy! she screamed all

frightened. Her mother entered her daughters` sleeping room and explained to her that it

is just thundering, that that s normal, that it happened many times before, yet Ana noticed

nothing, since she was together with her par ents. By telling her that she should expect the

rain, the sleepy mother of Ana left the room. Ana sensed that something important is going

to happen, so she decided she won t sleep until it begins to rain. She revised the events that

took place in the school that day. She found out that it is good that she didn t fall asleep,

because she would have to invent a story. By analyzing all the fazes of the todays incident

she found out that when they begin to ask them about who s guilty, the ones that would be

punished the most would be her parents. Ana knew about the school legislation, that all the

pupils are the same. So she shouldn t have separated her class friends on the ones that are

worth or worth not of her friendship. Indisputably she would put her parents in a mess. The

school authorities would undoubtedly expel her from this school and tell her parents that

they should find another place for their sugar cube daughter, place that matches theircruel, elitist standards. For the first time in her life Ana found out that she has to lie, in

order to keep her and her parents comfortable lifestyle. Her parents were employed in the

administration, and she knew by the similar incident that she witnessed with her

neighbors, that they would have repercussions on their workplace . Ana doesn t want to

return to live in that smelly provincial city, the one she remembers of only in her darkest

nightmares . Ana doesn t want to see herself in rags, looking like a gipsy with an unwashed

face, like those hooligans that attacked her today at school. If this happens, her mother

would never hug her like today, because her breath would smell on garlic, like it did ofthose sugar cube molesters. Ana thought that she may lie (at that time there were no secret

cameras anywhere), because she had invested in her reputation. The homework of Ana was

always amongst the best ones, so the mistresses would presumably believe more to her, the

descent girl, than to those hooligans. As the first drops of the rain begun to knock on the

window, Ana begun to fall asleep. The next day she found out that it was good that she


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prepared herself, as her intuition proved out to be truthful. She entered the investigation-

office where she noticed she was the last one to enter. When standing in front of the

mistress Ana was all polished and freshly ironed. The attackers with their faces red of

anger, were sitting in the corner of the room alongside their cheaply dressed parents, whose

eyes were as greedy as chimps ones daydreaming of a banana. The mistress, with her tone

already approving of the exemplifying presence of Ana asked:

-Ana your school friends told us they were angry at you because you didn t wan t to play

with them?

-That s not truth. I wanted to play with them, but they threatened me that if I join them

they would beat me.

-Why should they want to beat you?

-Because they sensed from my accent that I am provincial. They were from the big city;

they didn t want somebody like me to be near them.

-Is that what they told you?

-They told me not only this. Go back to you heard you provincial bastard, you cow; fuck off

ugly whore etc. We are taught in a manner to speak only polite, so at first I was ashamed

to tell you all this.

-So you wanted to be polite, that is why you waited so long. You didn t want to disturb yourmistresses with these violent words. That is why they could do this to you.

-They didn t just insult me. They attacked me to. They hurt me physically too.

-Dear Ana, how did they hurt you?

-With the stick from our national item.

-Dear child, where did they hurt you?

-On my shame place.

-Who did that to you?

Ana pointed the boy with the greasy, black hair. His father sitting next to him first looked

ironically at his suns` eyes, and then, as knowing well from earlier everything about this

eyes, slapped the boys forehead. The mistress hugged Ana that was already crying. This

boy together with the two other attackers was suspended from the school, and two waging

girls earned the warning note. But this was not the solvation of the problems for Ana, at


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least not like she thought solvation should be like. Every night from now one, she had to

think before falling asleep what she will speak about when she goes to school. At first she

thought that if she doesn t take care what she speaks about, they may find out about her

lies. But later she found out that now, she- th Ana, is in. She is the school hero, now

everybody wants to be like her. Most of the pupils now stay in the classroom during the

brake, and read. Nobody cares about those hooligans anymore: The place of the Petar Pans

is in the bushes nearby, not in the school, she thought. Ana you beat the shit out of those

bastards. You should know that we are all on your site, told her one of her she - classmates,

with a red hair in a ponytail. But you are telling me about this now, where were you when

they attacked me, worryingly thought Ana. And again she reminded herself it is good she

didn t say laud what she had in mind; that is how she may lose this friend of hers and many

others, so when the next incident happens nobody will be on her site. This classroom is a

cruel place, so Ana must keep her friends and keep on lying. She must keep on lying

everybody, including her parents! Obviously her parents weren t r ight about everything, so

she will not listen to their advice to select her friends , because for some reason they are

unaware that their advice is useless. Probably because they were educated in that stinky

provincial school (which building was an ex- stable); and because except on their work

place, they are pretty unaware of how things in the big city are happening. So from now on

Ana would socialize with everybody, but will not tell about this to her parents. Thisconclusion Ana, the little sugar cube, found out to be of great importance for their (hers and

her parents) future. The attitude of being friend with everybody will keep the percentage of

her friends in the class high (she will need them to be on her site in the case of another

incident), and will reduce the chance of another incident happening to her to minimum.

Ana was surprised and from another conclusion she came up to analyzing this school court

process. Her parents did tell her to avoid many school friends, but they never asked she

ever did so. Did the parents of Ana care enough about their daughter? Maybe and they are

some liars like everybody around her? Her mother is tall with brown hair, and her fathertall with black hair; both of them unlike Ana that is a small girl with a curly hair. Maybe I

am adopted, thought this tiny girl crawling in her bed, and trying not to scream (and wake

up her parents) as she burst in tears. Ana couldn t fall asleep easily when she had these

thoughts. Many times she felt as the climate was changing together with her anguish. If

she didn t saw the lightening (as in the time of the incident) she would start to stare at the


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lights of the cars, which were penetrating the window and moving the shades around her

dolls. Usually when she thought that her parents are insincere with her and that they were

not her real ones, the thought that made her calm and fall asleep was that even if it was so,

their future is in togetherness. Her future is together with the future of her parents, so Ana

must care about all of them. One morning she woke up for school before her mother came

up in her room. Ana listened the steps of her mother in the corridor as for some reason

coming closer to her room and again distancing form it, whispering something to her

father Ana took the little pink mirror that was placed next to the dolls, s he looked at her

face. Ana was horrified to find out that her eyes were not like the ones she used to have.

Her eyes used to be like the ones from some of her dolls, but now they were gray and scary,

like that awful boy with the greasy hair had. That savage dwarf that mercilessly attacked

her now had his space in her eyes. Ana was a golden fish in the magic lake, but the dwarf

penetrated the water with his dirty body and polluted it forever. Ana heard some dreadful

noise! Is it that thunder again that saved her during the incident? Ana swopped into the

pillow, pretending she was sleeping, as her mother with her new boots with high hills, came

noisy to the door of the bedroom, and opened it. She put her fingers in her daughters hair

and whispered Angel, wake up. It s time for school. Ana sad OK in a snoring manner, and

when her mother left her room, once again she looked in the mirror to see her own lying

face and her new eyes. The day that she had in school was particularly boring andexhausting for her, as Ana had to keep of all of her lies again, because it was the

forgiveness day 2. As a complete surprise during the last class the door opened and

interrupted the lecture. The director of the school entered. He was a giant tall as the door

he entered through, with a gray hair as big as baroque powdered wig. This kind of wigs was

familiar to Ana as she had it on one of her dolls. Behind him entered a small creature,

which compared to this Goliath looked as small as a poodle. It was a small girl with a curly

brown hair. She was so beautiful and tiny, and so unlike the rest of her class mates, so that

Ana immediately felt in love in her. Dear children now I want y ou to meet your new classmate , the girl stepped in front of the director. Who wants to have her seat next to her?,

and Ana again obsessed with her benevolent reputation volunteered. But then the giant

added Her name is Ana. As Ana the blond scented the fresh smell of Ana the brunet siting

2 On this day people that had a quarrel have a makeover. Sometimes they go for this reason at their

homes and have a makeover lunch together.


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at the chair next to her, Ana the blond begun to develop mixed fillings. What is now this?

Violation of her identity? Ana the blond and Ana the brunet! said the two meter tall silver

ghost whose head was floating in the white mist, his hair. He left the classroom, the pupil

stood up and seated in respect. Two Anas looked at each other in an allure of complete

tenderness, as to both of them seemed they never had before. Soon they became best

friends. Ana the blond was happy to find out that Ana the brunette was from a very nice

family, her parents were driving even a better car than hers, and she was a single child too.

Ana the blond didn t want to socialize with somebody that is somewhat different from her,

and she wanted to do everything like her parents advised her to do (and that is her friends

to be only the nicest girls and boys in the school). Few months passed and Ana the blond

begun to wander why her parents didn t give her some of those useful advices anymore;

why her mother doesn t want to talk with her so often li ke she used to do; now her mother

doesn t hug Ana before her falling asleep anymore; is it because Ana is more mature or

because her parents for some reason are angry at her; probably her parents find out that

she socializes with everybody- she is not their sugar cube anymore; Anas` parents had some

matrimonial problems, Ana listened them fighting in the room next to hers, her mother

asked her father what is that white powder aside their bathroom mirror, and her father sad

it was aspirin, he had to chop it in order to swallow it because he had a weak stomach

Her mother spanked her father in the face whispering: You poor liar! Though her parentsreduced the hugging, and sweet talks with their bellowed daughter, Ana noticed that they

began to buy her more luxurious presents. Like the new pink Disney school bag with

painted Cinderella; new dolls- one really big, the largest of them all up till now, the one

that Ana placed in the middle of all the other dolls and called her as indicated on its

cardboard package Darja (this doll had a 19 th century entourage, sausage brown curls, and

blue eyes form alabaster which were closing when she lied her on her back); or the small

but reach with clothes doll Anastazia (this doll was bald, but it had many wigs , clothes,

accessories and make up in order to change her appearance); and many other toys andclothes. So Ana formed an opinion about herself that her parents are still nice and caring,

but she is a bad girl. I am so weak and characterless, I must be stronger and achieve

everything the way my parents told me to, thought Ana each night before she went to sleep,

starring at the car reflections at hers` room wall.


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My parents were nice; I destroyed everything, messing with those smelly classmates. I ruined

the health of my father. He used to be a healthy man, but now he worries about me, due to

which he became unhealthy. His stomach became week, and he has to take aspirin. I am

such a mess, I have to find a way how to get rid of all of those cave- children around me. I

heard my parents talking about moving to other, better place. My mother cries all the time. I

guess she needs some energy for that too. And me, I am such a lazy swamp. My poor mom, I

must be more helpful to her

Just as she was thinking like this, Ana heard the steps in the corridor coming towards her

room. She closed her eyes, wrapped herself in the blanket, and begun to pretend she is

sleeping. Her mother opened the door, and what happened for the first time put the light

on. Ana squeezed her eyes as she was trying to continue sleeping. Her mother whispered

with a cold, TVpresenterrish voice:

-Open your eyes sugar cube, I know you are not sleeping.

-How do you know?

-The dress of Darja sways. You were touching her seconds before I entered. Why do you

move you dolls all the time?

-I don t want th e light from the cars into their eyes.-S ugar they are just dolls. You shouldn t worry about them. They feel nothing. Does the

light from the cars bother you? Shall I put a black curtain?

-No it doesn t bother me. Don t worry about me mom. Worry about yourself. You have

become too skinny.

-Me? Skinny? Skinny is in now. I want to become like one of your dolls. So that all the

clothes would fit me. What do you want me to do for you?

-To hug me, like you used to.

-Honey I will but not now. I smell on cigarettes and I haven t brushed my teeth yet. Oh mygod! Oh my god! What have you done with this doll? This dolls face is on her back. She

should be dead by now.

-Don t worry about it. Worry about yourself. They are jus t dolls they feel nothing. Don t cry.

I didn t turn her he ad like that. Or if I did it wasn t intentionally, probably the cleaning

lady did so.


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-I am not crying. It is just sad. This doll is so beautiful

-You are beautiful mum. The most beautiful doll in the world.

-I have toI have to tell you something important.

Ana stepped out of the bed. She hugged her mother, who was now bursting into tears. Her

mother corrected the head of the doll, and its dress that was wrinkled. She placed Ana in

bead with the doll next to her. She kissed the hair of her sugar cube. In deed this strong

and tall woman had a dog breath. But for Ana everything that was from her mother was

beautiful. The mother of Ana for her daughter was the most gorgeous doll. Ana will not

disappoint her. From now on she will always care with whom she talks to and with whom

she walks with. In her class there was another new pupil. It was a skinny boy, shortest

member of their class. His clothes were rags. He had a smelly green, home- hackled

pullover, with holes on it. But his dirty shirt was always buttoned up till the last bottom on

his neck. Actually he was one of the best pupils. But nobody paid any attention at his

beautifully written homework, as everybody was repulsed by his smelly, greasy hair. He

always sat alone, as everybody isolated him. His parents d idn t pay any attention to this. So

it seemed, as they always collected him without a car each day, and just asked the teacher

weather their boy was good, or whether he paid enough attention during the class. They

were the mare shadow of their boy, all ragout and smelly, both of them wearing heavyspectacles. Approximately one week after his arrival, the mistress of the class (the one that

always had few nice words for Ana) said in front of the children that the class is happy to

have a new and excellent pupil, and that they will be happy to find him a friend to sit next

to him. At that time the society was completely socialis t, so everybody talked like this

mistress, completely in passive. Nobody ever talked with the pronouns I and me, but

everybody used the collective manner, us and we. And we are happy to announce that that

will be our best pupil Ana Ana the blond. Ana dear please take your sit next to him. Ana

had to sit on her new place, as she was watching with sadness in her eyes Ana the brunet.She had to leave this wonderful sit due to the stupidity of her mistress. At the end of the

school day, when they arrived to take her from school, her parents saw her sitting next to

that smelly boy. But showed no rigor due to this. On the contrary they seemed quite pleased

with the new situation, as they said one politely good afternoon to the mistress. On this

date, Ana the blond, begun to develop second thoughts and doubts about her parents too.


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Do they remember what have they told her at all? Are her parents some kind of liars? Her

parents are not so consistent as they are requiring their daughter to be? For e.g. her mother

many times wanted to tell something important to her daughter, but she never did , yet

they both, her mother and father, always expected from their sugar cube to be precise about

everything. These days Ana the blond was unhappily surprised to find out that they had to

move in the suburb, and the new apartment was pretty miserable; yet she was happy to

find out that her mistress felt down at the stares of the school, and broke her skull. So she

had to lie in the hospital for one year, and Ana the blond could sit again next to Ana the

brunette. At some time before moving the mother of Ana the blond entered the room of her

daughter before sleeping time. It seemed that again the mother was in a before- crying-

mood.

-Ana, sugar I have to tell you something important.

-I am willing to listen to you as always.

-Like you may see you are blond. Like your doll, Anastazia. We can change her wig, and

make her brunette or black. Like Susan Howard.

Anas` mother pulled out the wig from the doll- Anastazia. Immediately she screamed as

scared as a devil before a cross. The skull of the doll had a hole on her back; two sides of theplastic surface were glued together with glue and connected with a screw. Ana explained to

her mother that while she was sleeping, due to the fact that the dolls collection was on the

table next to her bed, while moving in her bed she unintentionally broke the doll. She didn t

want to disturb her mother that already had enough worries, so she glued that hole. Ana

hugged her mother. Her mother rejected her body. The mother was all in tears, and left the

sleeping room of her daughter without wishing Ana sweet dreams. The new apartment

where they moved was in a really cheap suburb. Besides, it wasn t a safe neighborhood

since Ana did not have permission from her parents to play in the yard between thebuildings. The streets in the new neighborhood were really dirty, so it began to happen

many times that when she arrived in school she was with dirty shoes. The new apartment

was really small, so was its bathroom. So Ana couldn t have her regul ar bath every day. For

the first time she experienced how it is to be with a lack of hygiene, and have infections in

her mouth. She began to be afraid that they may expel her from her school since now she


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was leaving in another part of the city. Her mother kept on regularly taking her to school

with their car, though her father couldn t. He was ill from some rare disease. All of the time

he was in the hospital (at least this is what Ana was told by her mother), and when he was

at home he was completely fatigued and sleepy. Her father just lied down in the bed all day

through. Once he wanted to enter the room of his daughter and kiss her before sleeping, but

her mother intervened, forbidding him ever to do so. The mother of Ana also called her

father an edict; and combined this catego rization with the f word. H er father begun to cry

like a lady. In this kind of moments (and as the time went by, Ana had them more each

day), she was lying in her bed and thinking of her friend, Ana the brunet. Ana the brunet,

according to Ana the blond, was the real sugar cube. Ana the brunet was always the stable

doll, yet Ana the blond always knew how to hide the fact she is not that cube anymore. As

advised by her mother Ana the blond never told anyone that they moved to another place in

the city; nor she said anything to the social workers, when they visited the pupils, and

asked each one of them do they have any home- problems. Ana the blond had to lie, her

mother advised her so because if they find out that they live in another part of the city,

and her parents had fights, Ana the blond would be transferred in a school which is not

posh. So Ana the blond ke pt on lying: she lied when she noticed that her dolls and the

expensive bags, clothes and school inventory from her room disappeared one by one, so that

in less than two months she had nothing nice anymore; Ana the blond also lied that herparents didn t sell the car. She had to go each day with that dangerous bus all alone

towards her school, after which she was so tired that she could barely listen to what the

teacher was saying. Regarding this the mother of Ana just told her that they had sold the

car in order to buy expensive medicine for the disease of her father. Yet Ana the blond

managed to keep everything tidy and successful around her, she was still the best pupil in

her class. The one and only thing that kept her spirit high was the presence of her friend,

Ana the brunet. Their parents met each other, they both slept during holidays in each

other s homes, so Ana the blond indeed believed that she had Ana the brunet as a close andfaithful friend. As the time went by, and as Ana the blond spent these summer holidays in

the comfort of her apartm ent, her mother told her that if she wants to move in the second

grade, Ana will have to be more cooperative with her mother; they stayed almost with no

money, due to the disease of her father; if Ana is ill, or somehow disabled they could take

certain amounts of money from the social help. Ana willingly listened to what her mother


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had to tell her since she too had an interest her family to have more money. Ana was

starving, the meals that her mother was giving her, consisted of slice of bread and tee were

not enough to keep her fed. Her mother shriveled due to this starvation. So the mother

advised the daughter to lie the social worker, and tell him that she has exhaustion and

headaches and that they need money for special food. After two hours of waiting in the

smelly corridors of the social service, Ana and her mother proudly entered the room, what

was with the social worker and the doctor in it . But the doctor sad that he will not examine

the girl again because he remembers their case; they had already sent them the food

packages, but obviously her mother didn t give her the food; if this continues to happen they

will arrest the mother. The mother kept on insisting that they don t need food supplies,

but money for the special food and medicine for her daughter and her special disease. The

mother didn t forget to add that Ana is the best pupil in the class. The social worker sad

that the father of Ana is the f edict and that they had no capacity to deal with the

degenerative cases as hers. T hey threw them both out of the social center. The mother

hugged the daughter that was crying and told her that she knows that Ana hates her

because of the fact that in spite of everything she still loves her father; she is not a bad

mother; it is just the way things are. Then she asked Ana weather she feels hungry, they

may seat in an ice cream place, eat as much as they like, and pay nothing since the waitress

was a friend of her mother. When they sat, the mother of Ana ordered 30 balls of ice creamfor her daughter. The small lady with a snowy white short hair in her 60s, the waitress-

friend of her mother, asked whether that would be too much for her daughter. Ana may

catch a fever from all that ice-cream. The mother of Ana told the waitress that she knows

her daughter; s he is a big eater. Ana ate all 30 balls of ice-cream, and her mother just 2.

The next morning Ana woke up with a fever. Her mother took 2 umbrellas, and both of

them entered the bus and headed towards the hospital. It was a dark, rainy day in the

middle of the summer. In the room of the doctor Ana recognized in the doctor her own

father that now had mustaches, different eye color, and a gray wig. Ana could see that theglued mustaches from the left side of the face of her father were slowly falling. But he was

keeping them with his hand. He was wearing the white doctor uniform, and on his feet he

had white clomps . The doctors ` hands like to any other edict were shaking. He, the doctor

(the father of Ana undercover) sad that he will inject her penicillin, and that she will have

to keep on taking antibiotics every day (3 times a day) in the next 7 days. Ana sad that


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her bottom and her leg hearted really bad from the injection, was that the way it was

supposed to be? The do ctor/father replied with an irony in his voice that the pain will

pa ss. Her fever passed in 4 days time, but Ana couldn t move her leg properly any more.

The right leg had shrunk and deformed on the left site towards inside. Now Ana had to take

care how she walks, she could easily fail on her face as her leg was on a swelling. The

doctors from the social center estimated that this damage happened due to a use of an

antibiotic injection which was with an expired date, so the parents of Ana were finally

allowed to take financial help from the social service. As advised by her mother, Ana

learned how to walk in order not to show her deformity. Almost nobody noticed that she

was a cripple. Se swayed while walking, and kept her crippled leg straight forward, each

time well each time she didn t forget. Now Ana was going in the second grade so nothing

should stand in her way anymore. She was happy to sit in the classroom and be the best

pupil once again. Ana the blond was happy again to sit next to her best friend, Ana the

brunet. One day Ana the blond saw her purple hair needle in the hair of Ana the brunet.

Ana the blond was sure that this was her hair needle, the same that disappeared from her

closet few months ago.

* * *

She is standing in front of her bedroom mirror, carefully applying makeup on her beautiful

face. For a while she admires the beauty of the dolls that are placed next to the mirror.

Especially Darja. Her head and her shoulders look proud in the silvery, modern dcolletage.

She coms her hair, her curls. She lets her hair fall frivolously on her bare back. She puts

the hair needle on her left site, and throws all of her hair beneath her right shoulder. She is

29. She never, ever dived her hair. Her hair is curly and brown. Her name is Ana.

Ana the brunet haven t seen Ana the blond, her friend maybe 3 moths. The vacationspassed, it was September. Ana the brunet was the best friend of Ana the blond. She was

always with her, supporting her in all of the life trouble and violence, as they may occur in

geography where they were living. The mutilation that happened to her friend was a

terrible accident; she supported her friend in fighting for her right, through the days in the

infantry and in the first days of her marriage. Now Ana the blond is an independent


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working woman, happily married with a 5 year old sun. The parents of Ana the blond sold

everything they had to the parents of Ana the brunet in order to provide the next fix for the

father. Shortly after the mutilation, the father died from overdose, and the mother was

placed in the mental institution. Ana the brunet never, ever mentioned to Ana the blond

that she had doubts that she is adopted. Ana the brunet never told Ana the blond that she

may see her dolls, and take them if she likes, up till the time Ana the blond was safe. She

cared about her friend. But even if she liked to take them Ana the blond didn t have s afe

space in the infantry where to keep her objects. Infantries in Macedonia are dangerous

places. Ana the blond was very careful, always kept the door of her room locked,

maintaining close relationship with the infantry personnel. Ana the blond was one of the

rare girls in that infantry that was never raped. Ones` life is a cruel thing. That is why Ana

the blond believed her life is a success. During her days in the infantry Ana the blond was

always happy when Ana the brunet came with her parents to take her away from that place

for few hours. Usually they were all going to cinema or to a sweet shop. If the second, Ana

the blond never ordered ice-cream. As she grove into a tall and strong woman, her disability

begun to show more, so many people had doubts whether she could find a husband at all.

But she did, the angelically good man Damjan. He worked in the social service. Ana the

blond many times wished she wasn t crippled, she thought she was becoming fatigued

easily due to her disability. But so far, so good. Everything was going OK. She sat in thetrendiest caf in the neighborhood- Providenie , waiting for Ana the brunet to arrive. She

wore those heavy/gipsy/fake-golden earrings, and on her mouth she had applied red

lipstick. Although dressed very poor Ana the blond looked somehow fresh, posh. Although a

natural blond, she looked kind of Spanish. The waitress came:

-What would you like to drink?

-I would order later. Now I am waiting for my friend.

-Than you cannot sit here. Wait aside, on the bench in the park.-Why did you ask only me? I saw that unlike me you are waiting for all other guests to call

you. Is it because I am crippled?

- Absolutely not! Can t you recognize me sis, we were working together in the social center

as cleaners? Now you are sitting us here as cream della cream. I know you are not cream.

-Right sis, than one ice cafe for me.


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-How would you like the ice-cream? Vanilla , pistachio

-Of course no ice-cream. Just ice.

-I don t understand. Why of course? Everybody drinks it with ice-cream.

-It has too many calories.

-What a strange girl you are, sis

With all its impoliteness the waitress left the space in front of the table where Ana was

sitting. Ana took the pink mirror (that she took back from Ana the brunet) from her purse,

and saw she is all blushed. She hates this woman! Ana the brunet arrived with plastic bags

as she did always before on these meetings. She is showing what she bought that day-

clothes, socks for her husband, cosmetics Ana the brunet showed to Ana the blond the

new hair-oil she has bought. Ana the blond sad she would like to try it later. Ana the blond

thought weather this woman ever thinks that she can be jealous at her; she can never

afford to have those things her friend has; she is a respected member of the local

community, everywhere she goes everybody admires her; she has everything Ana the blond

didn t have and never will. Than Ana the brunet sad:

-I don t have children!

-I know that. But trust me honey, they will suck all your energy.-I thought that now when we have everything, we can have children too.

-Just be patient and it will happen. By the way did your husband return from his business

trip?

-You know how it is in the Middle East, everything happens slowly and with prolonging.

Especially for the architects.

-Lucky you, your husband is an architect. Unlike mine who is a socio.

-What s wro ng with the social workers? Job like any other.

-That s what you think. It s just not a respectable job in this society. Maybe in some other.-Architects job can be stressful and risky. That s why we still have no children.

Two Anas hugged, as Ana the brunet had tears in her eyes. She whispered in the ear of Ana

the blond that her husband took some risky transaction, she wanders when or will th eir

waiting situation ever end. Ana the blond wiped her friends tears with a napkin, and sad


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that she will go to the toilet to try the hair oil. She returned, with the bottle that was

almost half empty. Ana the brunet told her that to her it looks she didn t apply as much as

it seems. Anyway that was not important. Two women begun to walk around the cafes and

through the moll that was nearby, holding each- others` hands, like high school friends.

They were walking like that and discussing the latest fashion in clothing and perfumes.

Ana the brunet told the other Ana that she thinks she should begin to write and publish

something; she is a talented writer; she knows that from her e-mails and from her writings

in primary and high- school. Before separating two women passed near Providenie, where

they saw an ambulance with their waitress in it. She broke her head falling on the stairs.

Ana the brunet sad that this reminded her of their mistress . Ana the blond went away

from this meeting all in high spirits.

Write! Write!! Write!!!

Now Ana the blond occupied her thoughts with ideas about her writing. She is going to

write a poem about all the things that were stolen from her: objects, body parts. She is

going to name it: The Poem of Mutilation. When she entered home, her husband was sitting

in front of the TV, only with the pans of his pajamas on him, barefooted and with his

eyeballs wide open. In his hand he was holding a beer can. Ana was all in high spirits andwanted to tell him about her idea for the poem. She came leaned towards him in order to

kiss him, and immediately scented his beery, dog breath. He slapped her so hard in her face

that she thought she is going to fall down. Ana sensed blood through her nose. She closed

her nose with her fingers. Thought hurt Ana would rather felt lava entering her ears and

exiting through her nostrils than let this ape see her tears. Damjan stood up. Is he going to

kill her?

-Again you did something to our son?-I am his mother. Whatever I did I did for his best.

-Why does he have broses on his hands?

-He didn t want to read his homework. The history learn book. So I tied his hands behind

his chair.

-With what?


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-With a metal wire.

-How was he supposed to turn the pages on?

-With his tongue, of course.

-You told him that if he tells me what you did to him, you gonna mutilate him. Well bitch, I

believe we had an agreement that something like this is not going to happen again in our

house.

-You mean in our apartment.

-For god sake d on t you understand that he is our son? We are supposed to care about him.

-Well I do care. I wouldn t let him go to school without his homework finished. How about

you?

-The doctor said he will have to rest few days. His ankles are severally heart. You could

have broken them?

-Me! Never! I only do the best for our son!

-You lying cant!

Damjan slapped Ana the blond in her face this time really hard with his fist. Her earing

flied away from her ear. With her fingers she sensed that the earing had cut her ear all

through, `n flied away without opening. Large amounts of blood were streaming from her

ear, but skillfully she was stopping them with her fingertips. Now Ana has to be verycareful, she has to calm down this situation. She told her husband that he shouldn t be

angry at her this much and hit her so hard, that earing was so expensive. She advised her

husband to calm down by telling him to sit and finish his beer. Damjan drunk the beer till

the bottom. Than Ana asked him where is their son; when he said with his grandma, she

sad that that was very good. He adores his granny. She noticed through his pajamas that

Damjan had his bulge; she knows her husband well. He always has it in the stressful

situations like this one. Damjan threw the can, and went in the bathroom. There he cried

like a fag. While listening to this painful orchestration, all high spirited, Ana collected themess in the room. She is happy when she knows she has hurt him, he doesn t worth `n

deserve anything. Especially not a women like her. Damjan is a messy social servant, he

has to go all next week through the eastern parts of the country, and make sure weather

the toilets in the public schools are all right. Damjan stepped out of the bathroom. Pulled

out his pajamas. He still has his bulge. Damjan squeezed his body toward his wife. Ana


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doesn t feel like having sex. Ana pushed him aside, and told him to see what h e did to her

expensive earing . Damjan told her that she was wearing for them only expensive things,

like the big ladies. Ana kept on pushing him, but he persisted; in taking what by the law is

his. Ana didn t feel like that, my god doesn t he know how it feels for a woman after whole

day of inhaling the deflorations and feces smells from the public toilet, her working space;

he should let her first have a shower; nevertheless if she is inflexible, he may divorce her;

t hat is not a way for a sugar cube like her to go. Ana sh ould think of her future and must

have compromises.

Fuck! Fuck!! Fuck!!!

Resting after the intercourse Ana begun to daydream about her poem. Poem? But that is

too difficult; she doesn t have time for it. Besides now she cannot concentrate, her ear hurts

really bad. Maybe she should write them just a song. In the morning she cleaned

everything, went to the doctor to soy her ear, returned and set on the kitchen table in front

of the blank paper. An article in the daily inspired her for her song. She wrote almost

everything she wanted. But something grabbed her hair. It was her son. In the morning his

grandma brought him home. Granma knew Ana was free of work that day. My god this boy

bastard, look what he did to her!? He diminished her inspiration. She took the rolling pinand hit his hand immediately, as hard as possible. The boy begun to cry loud and she kept

on yelling at him.

-You disgusting little monster! Haven t I told you millions of times not to tell anybody what

we do here? Your father will throw both of us on street if he finds out. Don t you understand

that that is not good for you? You poor stupid boy, don t you h ave any brains? Or you have

only shit instead?

Ana watched the face of her son. All cried up. His face is so tiny and aery; everybody would

feel sorry for him. But not her, Ana the blond. Now she simply wants to see him dead. She

threatened her son that if he doesn t stop to cry immediately, she will break his other hand

too. If he is nice, she would just lock him inside his room and let him finish his homework.

Ana left her son in his room, locked the room, and told him that after three hours she will


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enter the room, and bring him the lunch. He better had his homework ready than! If you

don t do your homework , you will become somebody like me! echoed the cold voice of his

mother in the freezing boys` room (in this part of the world people spent really small

amounts of money for heating!) Our little fellow was frightened by this intonation. But from

the content of his mothers` words he was scared as shit; so he begun to write fully

ambitioned. The son of Ana will have to write a text about the sunny weather. He is going

to be a writer like his mother. In the kindergarten they have told her that her requirements

are too large for a boy of his age. Usually boys at that age don t know to write, but her son

had an ambitious mother. She taught him already. Ana went to the kitchen and finished

her song:

GIRL ASIDE THE CHANNEL

Glitter of freshness on the lips

Longer lasts the content of thoughts

View at the unknown lake

of the sky. The past broke

viewed by your child.

Who takes the life of the young?

Magnificent the virgin, Made small though

Thoughts of gaze, heroin the stoic all through.

The chevalier widowing, with the golden lock

face- milk cheese, from the whitest dough undertook.

Fairy handsome in the gray landscape flows she, the beauty

of H.R. un worth. Under the rotten Balkan rebuked rests she

with the freezing dark earth, beside the channel she liedfrom the anger of the blind eyes in every human aside.

With the beauty of her thoughts this girl small

breath of the visitors stops, not without a goal

as indeed ths unearthly beauty has something to say,

The flowery dress heavenly pretty, future in no deny


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though at steadily age of six, this girl in its beauty.

With a flower bouquet, breeze in her hair through.

The indecent naivet begs, for fun of a child belongs.

The morning rain, wretched artist, picture of malice depicts.

Pure girl, with her best friend the doll, the rain salts/

her tears falling for her youth as to all girls

of the life still innocent she endows, fights, ignores.

Shortly lasted the joy of this landscapes

as that dark violence her thoughts deplores

now the immense beauty of its mother beloved

no more; protected took care, hugged by the mother

But by the violator crude slaughtered

The careless fornicator, by any reason rejected

all night through mercilessly fucked, fucked, fucked.

By the labyrinth of primitivism isolated

beneath the human dignity, so chauvinism gratified

in the city that instead the citizens watch

in care, to the rotten balkanians, people of wretch.Princess she could have become, inspire all, though wretch

she became, in the city where the most important is the f. match.

-What they will say? What will the world say to this sorrow?

We chose no flower? That body is not strange as it won t live for another day.

Ana was inspired by a newspaper article. About the girl that was found dead next to the

channel. It happened 2 months ago, they haven t found the murderer(s) yet. She was

provoked by the social luck of care. After that day she found no other articles regardingthis. Everybody cared about football matches instead. Ana is a humanistic poetess. Ana

cares about people. Ana wants to change people; Ana wants to change the society. She

wants to make them better. She looked at the wall clock. Three and a half hours passed.

Ana has to feed her sun, and take him to the kindergarten. Today he has his drawing

lessons. She wants her son to be well prepared when he begins to go to school. She opened


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her sons notebook, but she was shocked to find out that from 8 written pages she could

read nothing. All of it was like written with hieroglyphs. She asked her son: Why she

cannot read anything from his homework? He answered because his right hand hurts too

much, so he had to write with his left hand. She threatened: You little boy don t yo u lie to

me! Ana pulled her sons wrist from beneath the table, the boy screamed out of pain during.

His hand looked red, and was hot as it had fever. She decided not to take him to

kindergarten this day, and leave him rest in his bed, as the doctors suggested. The next few

days the weather drastically changed, it became unusually cold for that time of the year, it

was windy and rainy. The grandma phoned the second day, to ask how is her grandson.

Ana sad tha t he is superb, but the grandmother can not talk at the moment with her

bellowed grandson because he is currently in the toilet. Somebody else phoned after this,

but the next 3 days Ana answered no phones. She prepared her song, and e-mailed it to the

possible publishers. Ana these days did send other e-mails too. She wiped and cleaned

everything in that apartment. Everything was fresh and antiseptic, only the bad weather

outside spoiled the total impression of this shiny living place. Maybe she should have paid

more attention to her son too. All this time he was lying and yoking throughout his teeth.

He wasn t allowed to scream loud; because his mother threatened she would have broken

his other arm in that case. In the 4 th day Damijan phoned and asked whether it is truth

what they have told him in the kindergarten that their son wasn t there for 4 days already. Ana sad that that is nonsense; he was there and was happy to show his drawings to his

friends and to the teacher. Those in the kindergarten, according to Ana, were imbeciles.

Ana turned off the phone, and immediately scented some rotten smell in her nostrils. The

nuance of the smell was almost as of feces. Ana grabbed the blanket from her sons body. He

didn t go to bathroom nor urinated in his bad as she thought. But today unlike the days

before, his hand was completely blue. Ana decided it is top time for her to bring her son in

the hospital. She dressed him in a hurry, furiously, savagely in his clothes, and wrapped

him in his blanket, because he had a fever. She took him in her hands. Ten minutes shewas walking with him in her hands through the crowded streets towards the hospital, as

the unfriendly balkanians were staring at her. She doesn t feel bad from them; she doesn t

feel sorry for her son; it is of great importance for her that they can see that she doesn t

care. It would not be good for her to let her son walk by himself, Ana thought, maybe he

doesn t have strength to walk anymore. Somebody may see that, and blame her for that.


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The doctors in the hospital sad that it is good she has brought him, because he had

gangrene. If she had brought him later he could have died. But they had to amputate his

hand to the twist. During the amputation, Ana was thinking about the private doctors and

ordinations which in her city were in hundreds. She had heard that some of the best plastic

surgeons work in her city, because they do plastic surgeries to the criminals and ex-convicts

that pay them lavishly. If she had money she could have paid her son a better treatment.

That s life - a cruel thing. She had begun to think about her future. She could enjoy the next

few days as normal ones, and tell her husband about this after 5 days, at the time he

returns. Later Ana would discover that her husband was to blame for everything. Those

from the social service wanted to visit her, because the grandmother phoned them, but

Damijan stopped them because he sad that he would check himself his own wife. How

stupid thought Ana. She kept on walking through those new, small ordinations, which were

located in the basements of the living compartments. Some of the doctors were standing in

front of them. Ana saw a friend from the infantry. He looked kind of different than she

imagined he should have looked now, after all these years. He imaged kind of serious and

stable. He asked her why does n t Ana sometimes visit his ordination, to see how her friend

has become a serious doc? Ana answered that she would like, but she heard that they

were too expensive. The doc sad that for her whatever the treatment, the first one will be

free of charge. Ana told him to keep in mind this, because she plans to use this offer. Thenext few days Ana stayed in the apartment. She was surprised nobody phoned her at all.

She read one e-mail from an editor she had send her song to, telling her he thinks she

should check her psychic health. At the fifth day, she decided she will not wait for her

husband to throw her out; she would leave herself instead. She packed everything she had

in two bags, and went to Ana the brunet. If she takes her it would be cool, but even if she

doesn t, again it will be cool. Simply Ana the blond would find another place where to stay.

When Ana the brunet opened the door she was all in tears. She asked Ana the blond

weather she saw the latest news on TV. Oh shit, they announced I mutilated my own sun! The husband of Ana the brunet was arrested on the airport, for a financial fraud. Ana the

blond hugged her friend, as now she realized she may stay at her place. The next days she

found out that she shouldn t have left the apartment , because it wasn t property of her

husband, but of the social service. She could have stayed and kept the apartment. Now they

placed somebody else inside. Damijan returned the next day after the amputation and with


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their son went to grandmas` place. Now that fidget wants to steel her son? Well it s not

going to be easy for him! She, Ana the blond is a strong woman.

Strong! Strong!! Strong!!!

Those days Ana the blond visited that doc. Nobody knew why, since she told nobody. Ana

the brunet noticed that after that visit her best friend looked kind of drained, sick. But she

thought that her perception is bad, because she drunk sleeping pills all the time. Due to the

stress caused by the financial crime her husband was involved in, she Ana the brunet was

exhausted too. During the divorcing process Ana told the judges that she doesn t want to

imply her opinion but she thinks that her husband cannot care about their son, because he

drinks beer all the time, and their granny is too old; she sad that her husband lied to her all

the time, including about the property of the apartment, that s why their sun has no

future. Ana also added that she planned to have no children with him anymore because

Damijan was a lousy father , and she doesn t want to bear any more children in the society

that doesn t care about anybody; t his happened due to the fact her husband stopped the

social service to help them!; the social service is not a private firm owned by her husband !

she added. Finally Ana finished her expos with a statement that she is not like her

husband; when she says something she really means it. At this point Ana opened her purseand threw her frozen ovaries at the face of her husband, in front of everybody and in front

of the journalists! I really plan not to have any more children concluded Ana the blond.

S tepping out of the court room she gave some interviews for TV. I am a serious woman

she stated all the time. She was with high spirits again. That night many people phoned to

Ana the blond to congratulate her. Those from the social service also told her that they

have kept the apartment for her and that she may return. That living space is practically

hers; the socials were helping the caring mums, not the alcoholic fathers. So the next day

she returned. Ana the blond is back home, once again. Ana the blond is now high spiritedalso due to the reason that one magazine decided to publish her song. Isn t that sweet? Ana

the blond knows that again she is going to win. Like she won in the primary school, in front

of her mistress. Ana is the sugar cube. Ana is waiting in the courtroom for the final

announcement. The judge sad that Damjan will not keep his son because he is not capable

of such. Everybody applauded. Silence or I will empty the courtroom! interrogated the


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judge. And then added that they will give the child for an adoption because they had

serious indications that Ana is not psychically capable for that; they saw her record and at

many of her working places it was required for her to go to the psychiatric evaluation, but

she never did so; if she could prove that she is healthy, they would return her son.

Everybody begun to whistle.

* * *

One year passed after the final decision of the court, and Ana looked as she didn t age at all.

She was waiting in front of the ordination, for the psychiatrist to examine her. This is easy,

I have been doing this all year through. Now I just have to answer some questions. Ana

entered the office, and sat on a chair in front of the big woman in her fifties, with a hair

dived in red, that had gray roots. Her teeth were yellow, and had tiny mustaches above

them. Her voice sounded ageless, as she was a radio presenter 40 years ago.

-Do you think you will see you son again?

-No.

-Why?

-Because you won t ever let me. -Why do you think I have something against you?

-Because you are an ugly old woman.

-You think you are healthy?

-Isn t that obvious.

-It is obvious you are very unhealthy.

-You are the first one to tell me this. Everybody thinks that I am big and healthy as a

healthy man.

-Well that s very usual. Physically unhealthy people are always psychically healthy, andvice versa. By the way aren t you a little crippled?

-Don t give me that ice rsa sis. I want my son.

-Well sis, you won t get him. You don t deserve to have him.

-I deserve to have him. I won!


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-You mean you have beaten your husband. Well sis, our courts are not like the ones in EU

obviously.

-How can you talk to me in this manner? Aren t you a state servant?

-I am here to ask questions, not you. What are those bruises on your hands?

-I cut myself so that I can match the bruises with the stripes on my shirt. I am writing

poetry too. I am creative.

-Does your son think you are creative?

Ana left this stinky office thinking that who knows when she will have to come here again.

Maybe it is better that she has lost her son, now she has more time for poetry. Ana is

heading through the crowded streets towards the junk food restaurant where she will meet

the other Ana. Writing poetry? She has no energy for that, since all the time she is being

followed by those sluts and vagabonds which the judges are sending. In order to find out

whether she could or could not became a responsible mother. This is pretty bad because

undoubtedly she could have developed into a great poet. Ana the brunet told her so. Ana sat

in the junk food restaurant, and ordered French fries with plenty of ketchup and

mayonnaise on top. She began to eat with her hands. Ana the brunet like always was late.

They cannot meet each other in Providenie anymore because of those vagabonds that

follow them. They follow the other Ana too since her husband is in jail. Anyway Ana hatesthat p lace. If she sits in Providenie Ana will have to listen how they talk behind her back.

How she had cut the hand of her own son with electrical bread saw and left it hanging on

that tiny piece of flash. It s not true sh e doesn t care about her son. Ana knows he is

adopted somewhere in EU, with the nicest family possible. Everybody would like to adopt a

golden boy like hers. It doesn t matter he has one hand less. Ana felt like crying, she asked

the people that were having a lunch next to her for a cigarette. She may smoke, she is on a

terrace. She may watch the sun, inhale that organic lightness, that skids through her

nostrils and throat. She is a happy woman. She has the sun, the trees, the wind. Now theweather is not bad like it used to be in the last 20 years. It is amazingly good she is not in

Providenie. There she would off have to listen how they speak behind her back. How

stupid she was, she amputated her overalls. She should have known that they were her

future. She was a lebensborn child. Her mother was inseminated with Nazi semen. Her

parents could move from province and live in the big city because they received a lot of


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money for this. Ana should have beard many children and receive a lot of money for that.

But nobody, not even her own mother ever told her this. They all told her she was stupid;

she is blond; all blonds are stupid. Life was so cruel to Ana. From the very beginning she

was completely alone. They were all against her. Ana wiped out her tears as she had dust

in her eyes from the wind. She doe sn t want anybody to see her wea k. Than they could all

attack her even more. Ana is a good actress, she has her mask, she is capable of hiding

many things. They attacked her, but they didn t win. Nobody ever find out she paid the

children (the same ones that attacked her this way) to put oil on the stairs, so that her

mistress could break her had. Ana the brunet doesn t know she did the same with the

waitress using her hair oil; Ana the brunet doesn t know that her best friend read

adventure novels where she find out about black magic, and practiced it with her dolls

Ana the brunet never took the wig from the head of Anastazia; Ana the brunet doesn t know

that her best friend placed her husband in jail by sending an e-mail with the information

about his firm that she whispered in her ear. Ana the blond looked at the sky; beneath the

two clouds the sun penetrated the cold autumn sky. The sun is always young, like Ana. Ana

the blond moves her eyes from the sky down to her arriving friend. Ana the brunet, she is

100 hundred meters away walking proudly towards the junk restaurant. The golden leaves

from the trees are shading her curly brown hair, which as the time goes by is becoming to

look more and more tired. Again those junks are following her best friend, Ana the brunet. Ana the blond has few more minutes to think about herself. She is not like her thought

Ana the blond. Ana the blond is always strong. Somewhere she read that Ana is the most

frequently used name in the world. Maybe even half a billion of people were named Ana.

Yet only she, Ana the blond is the real Ana. She had beaten the agnostic school system and

her own husband. It s good she amputated her overalls. She needs men no more. Women

are the best. All women should be lesbians. Not women like her mistress. Her mistress had

a big hole on her head; the woman that has a big hole is a whore. My god those awful men,

that spent hours watching other ugly men, in the ugliest shorts in the world, and in theugliest sport- the football. And all of those men are incapable of baring a child. Our woman,

Ana the blond, became high spirited again.

She knows she will see her soon again. She knows they cheated her that her son said that

he does n t want to see his mother again, because she wanted to kill him. Everybody wants


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Anas, The Poem of Mutilation

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Transcript of Anas, The Poem of Mutilation