An Invitation to Health - Cengage · tual dimension of your health and your life. It also explores...

An Invitation to Health:

Build Your Future

D I A N N E H A L E S

1 5 t H E D I t I o N

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2

After studying the material in this chapter, you should be able to

• Identifythecharac-teristicsofemotionallyhealthypersons.

• Listandgiveexamplesofthethreemajorareasofpositivepsychology.

• Namethetwopillarsofauthentichappiness.

• Contrastcharacteristicsofoptimisticandpes-simisticindividuals.

• Discussthehealthben-efitsofspirituality.

• Identifywaystoenrichone’sspirituallife.

• Explaintherelationshipbetweengratitudeandpositivepsychology.

• Describefourwaysthatsleepaffectsdaytimewell-being.

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31

Visit www.cengagebrain.com to access course materials for this text, including the Behavior Change Planner, interactive quizzes, tutorials, and more. See the preface on page xv for details.©

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enhancinghappiness,anddevelopingthespiri-tualdimensionof yourhealthandyourlife.Italsoexploresanoftenoverlookeddimensionof physicalandemotionalwell-being:sleep.

Emotional and Mental Health“Asoundmindinasoundbody”was,accord-ing to theancientRomanpoet Juvenal, some-thingall shouldstrive for.This timelessadvicestill holds.Almost2,000years laterweunder-stand on a much more scientific level thatphysicalandmentalhealthare interconnectedincomplexandvitalways.Onedoesnotguar-antee theother,but recent researchhas foundthatindividualswhopracticefourfundamentalbehaviors—regular exercise, a healthful diet,moderatealcoholuse,andnotobacco—areless

rememberthenameof asinglepersonImetattheparty,”hesays.“ButI’llneverforgetthelookonthefamily’sfaceswhenwehandedthemthekeystotheirnewhome.”

Forhis finalproject,Adam,whodidnothaveareligiousupbringing,focusedondevelopingaricherspirituallife.“Thespiritualitydidn’tendwith the term,” he says. “I continue to medi-tate,doyoga,andreadreligioustextsbecauseIbelieveamorespirituallifewillhelpmeinthelongrunwithhappinessandhealth.”

Thequestforamorefulfillingandmeaningfullife is attracting more people of all ages. Thereason?Astheburgeoningfieldof positivepsy-chology has resoundingly proved, people whoachieveemotionalandspiritualhealtharemorecreative and productive, earn more money,attract more friends, enjoy better marriages,developfewerillnesses,andlivelonger.

This chapter reports the latest findings onmaking the most of psychological strengths,

Your Psychological and Spiritual Well-Being

Adam never considered himself a spiritual person

until he enrolled in a class on the science of per-

sonal well-being. For a homework assignment he

had to pursue different paths to happiness. As

part of his experiment, he went to a Mardi Gras

celebration and partied all night to see if having

fun made him happier. To test whether doing

good makes a person happy, Adam volunteered

to help build a house for a homeless family. “I can’t




32 Section I Building Your Future

emotionalstabilityandgrowth.Thecharacter-isticsof mentalhealthinclude:

• Theabilitytofunctionandcarryoutresponsibilities.

• Theabilitytoformrelationships.

• Realisticperceptionsof themotivationsof others.

• Rational,logicalthoughtprocesses.

• Theabilitytoadapttochangeandtocopewithadversity.

Culture also helps to define psychologicalhealth. In one culture, men and women mayexpress feelings with great intensity, shoutinginjoyorwailingingrief,whileinanothercul-turesuchbehaviormightbeconsideredabnor-malorunhealthy.Inourdiversesociety,manycultural influences affect Americans’ sense of whotheyare,wheretheycamefrom,andwhattheybelieve.Culturalritualshelpbringpeopletogether, strengthen their bonds, reinforce thevalues and beliefs they share, and provide asenseof belonging,meaning,andpurpose.

Tofindoutwhereyouareonthepsychologicalwell-being scale, take the Self Survey: “Well-BeingScale”onpage51.

The Lessons of Positive PsychologyPositivepsychologyhasbeendefinedas“thesci-entific studyof ordinaryhumanstrengthsandvirtues.” Rather than concentrating on whatgoes wrong in our lives and in our minds, itfocuseson“theaspectsof thehumanconditionthatleadtohappiness,fulfillment,andflourish-ing”—inotherwords,onwhatmakeslifeworthliving.2The three major areas of positive psy-chologyarethestudyof positiveemotions,suchashopeandtrust;positivetraits,suchaswisdomand courage; and positive institutions, such asstrongfamiliesanddemocracy.

According to psychologist Martin Seligman,Ph.D.,authorof Flourish: A Visionary New Under-standing of Happiness and Well-Being, who popu-larized the positive psychology movement,

likelytobecomedepressed,beoverwhelmedbystress,orsufferpoormentalhealth.1

Unlikephysicalhealth,psychologicalwell-beingcannot be measured, tested, X-rayed, or dis-sected. Yet psychologically healthy men andwomen generally share certain characteristics:Theyvalue themselves and strive towardhap-pinessandfulfillment.Theyestablishandmain-taincloserelationshipswithothers.Theyacceptthelimitationsaswellasthepossibilitiesthatlifehas tooffer.Andthey feelasenseof meaningandpurpose thatmakes the gestures of livingworththeeffortrequired.

Psychological health encompasses both ouremotionalandmentalstates—that is,our feel-ings and our thoughts. Emotional healthgenerally refers to feelings and moods, bothof which are discussed later in this chapter.Characteristicsof emotionallyhealthypersons,identified in an analysis of major studies of emotionalwellness,includethefollowing:

• Determinationandefforttobehealthy.

• Flexibilityandadaptabilitytoavarietyof circumstances.

• Developmentof asenseof meaningandaffirmationof life.

• Anunderstandingthattheself isnotthecenterof theuniverse.

• Compassionforothers.

• Theabilitytobeunselfishinservingorrelat-ingtoothers.

• Increaseddepthandsatisfactioninintimaterelationships.

• Asenseof controloverthemindandbodythatenablesthepersontomakehealth-enhancingchoicesanddecisions.

“Emotionalvitality,”asenseof positiveenergyandengagementinlife,correlateswithphysicalvitality. In a recent study the individuals whorankedhighestinthisstateof heightenedemo-tionalwell-beinghadthelowestriskof cardio-vasculardisease.

Mental healthdescribesourabilitytoperceiverealityasitis,torespondtoitschallenges,andtodeveloprationalstrategiesforliving.Themen-tallyhealthypersondoesn’ttrytoavoidconflictsanddistressbutcancopewithlife’stransitions,traumas, and losses in a way that allows for

emotional health The ability to express and acknowledge one’s feelings and moods and exhibit adaptability and com-passion for others.

mental health The ability to perceive reality as it is, respond to its challenges, and develop rational strategies for living.

culture The set of shared attitudes, values, goals, and practices of a group that are internalized by an individual within the group.

self-compassion A healthy form of self-acceptance in the face of perceived inadequacy or failure.




33Chapter 2 Your Psychological and Spiritual Well-Being

You can start practicing positive psychologyrightaway.Thenexttimeyouthink,“I’venevertriedthatbefore,”alsosaytoyourself,“Thisisanopportunitytolearnsomethingnew.”Whensomethingseemstoocomplicated,remindyour-self to tackle it fromanotherangle.If yougetdiscouragedandfeelthatyou’renevergoingtogetbetteratsomenewskill,tellyourself togiveitanothertry.

Develop Self–Compassion“College life is notorious for challenging stu-dents’ sense of well-being,” a team of educa-tionalpsychologists at theUniversityof Texaswrote in a recent paper, noting that studentsmust“managecompetingacademicandsocialgoalsaswellastheiremotionalreactionstobothsuccessanddisappointment.”6

One of the best ways to maintain well-being,they found, is self-compassion, a healthyform of self-acceptance that includes threecomponents:

• Treatingoneself kindlyinthefaceof perceivedinadequacybyengaginginself-soothingandpositiveself-talk.

• Recognizingthatsuchdiscomfortisanunavoidablepartof thehumanexperience.Thisrecognitionof “commonhuman-ity”promotesasenseof connectiontootherseveninthefaceof isolationanddisappointment.

• Facingpainfulthoughtswithoutavoidingorexaggeratingthemandmanagingdisap-pointmentandfrustrationbyquellingself-pityandmelodrama.

Intheirresearch,theabilitytorespondtolife’sdisappointments,dailyhassles,andstressfullifeeventswithself-compassionwasastrongpredic-torof students’well-being. (See“YourPsycho-logicalSelf-CarePyramid”inMakingChangeHappen,p.53,andinLabs for IPC tolearnspe-cificmethodsforbeingkindertoyourself.)

Boost Emotional IntelligenceA person’s “IQ”—or intelligence quotient—was once considered the leading predictor of achievement. However, psychologists havedetermined that another “way of knowing,”

everyone, regardless of genes or fate, canachieve a happy, gratifying, meaningful life.Thegoalisnotsimplytofeelgoodmomentarilyor toavoidbadexperiences,but tobuildposi-tivestrengthsandvirtuesthatenableustofindmeaningandpurposeinlife.Thecorephiloso-phyistoadda“buildwhat’sstrong”approachto the “fix what’s wrong” focus of traditionalpsychotherapy.

Some researchers categorize the spectrum of positive traits as those related to knowledge(creativity, curiosity, open-mindedness, love of learning, perspective); humanity (love, kind-ness, social intelligence); justice (citizenship,fairness, leadership); transcendence (apprecia-tionof beautyandexcellence,gratitude,hope,humor, spirituality); and temperance (humility,prudence,self-regulation,forgiveness).3

According to the “broaden-and-build” theoryof positiveemotions,suchemotionsexpandourways of thinking and acting. Joy, for instance,sparksanurgetoplay;contentment,anurgetoappreciateandbegrateful.Incontrast,negativeemotions narrow our behavioral range. Whenfrightened, for instance,wemay thinkonlyof fleeingfromdanger.Asmorethanadecadeof research has shown, broadening and buildingcanproducesignificantpositiveeffects, includ-ing buffering us against negative life events,promoting resilience, lowering the riskof psy-chological disorders, and enhancing physicalwell-being.4

Individualsvaryinthewaystheyrespondtoandregulatepositiveemotions.Thosewithhighself-esteem(discussedlaterinthischapter)aremorelikely to savor positive emotions, while thosewith low self-esteem tend to dampen them.(“HealthinAction”offerswaysof makingthemostof positiveexperiencesandemotions.)

Clinical psychologists have developed andtestedvariousinterventionsthatbolsterpositiveemotions, such as recalling positive memoriesfromone’slife,usingone’suniqueorsignaturestrengthsinnewways,andcultivatinggratitudeandacceptance.Theseapproacheshaveproveneffective in enhancingwell-beinganddecreas-ing negative feelings in individuals with andwithoutpsychologicalsymptoms.5

ThelabsinAn Invitation to Personal Change (IPC)applytheprinciplesof positivepsychology.

Health in Action

Accentuate the PositiveTry some of these strategies from positive psychology and comment on your experience in your online journal.

Do ✔ Smile. Putting on a happy

face makes for a happy spirit.

✔ Focus. By being fully present in the moment, you’ll experience it more intensely.

✔ Share your joy. Talking about and celebrating good experiences extends posi-tive feelings over and above the positive event.

✔ Travel through time. Viv-idly remembering or antici-pating positive events—a technique psychologists call “Positive Mental Time Travel”—boosts levels of happiness and life satisfaction.

Don’t ✘ Don’t hide your feelings.

Suppressing positive feel-ings—because of shyness or a sense of modesty, for instance—diminishes them and may have physiologi-cal consequences on your health.

✘ Don’t get distracted. Unrelated worries and thoughts detract from the here-and-now of a positive experience.

✘ Don’t find fault. Pay-ing attention to negative aspects of otherwise posi-tive experiences sabotages levels of happiness, opti-mism, self-esteem, and life satisfaction.

✘ Don’t go there. “Negative Mental Time Travel”—reflecting on what went wrong or what may go wrong—can lower self-esteem and foster depres-sive symptoms.





emotional intelligence A term used by some psychologists to evaluate the capacity of people to understand themselves and relate well with others.

self-actualization A state of wellness and fulfillment that can be achieved once certain human needs are satisfied; living to one’s full potential.

getenoughsleep,drivesafely,usesafersexprac-tices, exercise, not smoke, drink less, and eatfruits andvegetables.The reasonmaybe thattheyarethoroughintheirdecisionmakingandcarefully weigh the risks and benefits of theirbehavior.Theyalsocandelayimmediategrati-ficationforthesakeof long-termbenefits,suchaspreventingcardiovasculardiseaseorsexuallytransmittedinfections.

Although they’re more likely to participate invigorous exercise, students who score high inextraversionaremorelikelytoputtheirhealthat risk.Theyoftendrinkmorealcohol,binge-drink,smoke,engageinriskysexualbehaviors,and don’t get enough sleep. The reasons mayinvolve brain chemistry. Individuals with lowlevels of neurochemical arousal may pursuehighly stimulating (though risky) behaviors tofeelmorealertandexcited.

Personalityisnotdestiny.If youseeyourself aslowinconscientiousnessorhighinextraversion,youcantakedeliberatestepsthatwillsafeguardyourhealth.Forinstance,youmightfulfillyourneed for stimulation and excitement with lessrisky alternatives, such as X-Game competi-tions, rock-climbing, or volunteering with stu-dent-ledemergencyresponseservices.9

Meet Your NeedsNewbornsareunable tosurviveontheirown.They depend on others for the satisfaction of their physical needs for food, shelter, warmth,and protection, as well as their less tangibleemotionalneeds. In growing tomaturity, chil-dren take on more responsibility and becomemore independent.Noone,however,becomestotallyself-sufficient.Asadults,weeasilyrecog-nizeourbasicphysicalneeds,butweoftenfailtoacknowledgeouremotionalneeds.Yetthey,too,mustbemetif wearetobeasfulfilledaspossible.

The humanist theorist Abraham Maslowbelieved thathumanneeds are themotivatingfactors in personality development. First, wemust satisfy basic physiological needs, such asthoseforfood,shelter,andsleep.Onlythencanwepursuefulfillmentof ourhigherneeds—forsafetyandsecurity,loveandaffection,andself-esteem.Fewindividualsreachthestateof self-actualization, in which one functions at the

dubbed emotional intelligence, makes aneven greater difference in a person’s personalandprofessionalsuccess.

“EQ” (for emotionalquotient) is theability tomonitoranduseemotionstoguidethinkingandactions.Strongsocialorinterpersonalskillsareonemeasureof EQ.Asmorethanadecadeof research has shown, peoplewith high EQ aremoreproductiveatworkandhappierathome.They’realsolesspronetostress,depression,andanxiety and bounce back more quickly fromseriousillnesses.IndividualswithhighEQalsoseemmorelikelytohavegoodmentalandphys-icalhealth.7

According to recent research, females scoreslightly higher in emotional intelligence thanmales, but in both sexes, individuals whoare outgoing, dependable, and independent-mindedtendtohavehigherEQs.Bothsexesareequallycapableof cultivatinggreateremotionalintelligence.Emotionalintelligenceisn’tfixedatbirth,norisitthesameasintuition.Amongtheemotional competencies that most benefit stu-dents are focusing on clear, manageable goalsand identifying and understanding emotionsratherthanrelyingon“gut”feelings.

Know YourselfWhydosomestudentsconsistentlyinvestintak-ing the best possible care of themselves while

others repeatedly puttheir well-being at risk?The answers may liewithin their personali-ties. According to recentresearch, two personalitytraits—conscientiousness(striving for competenceand achievement, self-discipline,orderliness,re-liability, deliberativeness)and extraversion (beingactive, talkative, asser-tive, social, stimulation-seeking)—correlate withvery different healthbehaviors.8

Collegestudentswhoratehighinconscientiousnesstend to wear seat belts,

Working with young

children can boost

their self-esteem—

and yours.

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self-esteem Confidence and satisfaction in oneself.

betterpsychologically than thosewhocollapsewhenasetbackoccursorwhorelyonotherstomakethemfeelbetter.

Self-esteem has proved to be one of the bestpredictorsof collegeadjustment.Studentswithhigh self-esteem report better personal, emo-tional,social,andacademicadjustment.

Pursue Happiness“Imagineadrugthatcausesyoutoliveeightornineyearslonger,tomake$15,000moreayear,to be less likely to get divorced,” says MartinSeligman, the “father” of positive psychology.“Happinessseemstobethatdrug.”10Butevenif just about everyone might benefit by smil-ingmoreandscowlingless,canalmostanyonelearntoliveonthebrightersideof life?

Skeptics who dismiss “happichondria” as thelatestfeel-goodfadaredubious.However,hap-pinessresearchers,nowbackedbythousandsof scientific studies, cite mounting evidence sug-gesting that happiness is a learned behavior.“Happiness is measurable, and it’s buildable,”

highest possible level and derives the greatestpossiblesatisfactionfromlife(Figure2.1).

Boost Self-EsteemEachof uswantsandneeds to feel significantasahumanbeingwithuniquetalents,abilities,and roles in life. A sense of self-esteem, of belief orprideinourselves,givesusconfidencetodaretoattempttoachieveatschoolorworkand toreachout toothers to formfriendshipsandclose relationships.Self-esteem is the littlevoice thatwhispers,“You’reworth it.Youcandoit.You’reokay.”

Self-esteem is based not on external factorslikewealthorbeauty,butonwhatyoubelieveabout yourself. It’s not something you’re bornwith;self-esteemdevelopsovertime.It’salsonotsomethinganyoneelsecangivetoyou,althoughthose around you can either help boost ordiminishyourself-esteem.

The seeds of self-esteem are planted in child-hoodwhenparentsprovide theassuranceandappreciation youngsters need to push them-selves toward new accomplishments: crawling,walking,formingwordsandsentences,learningcontrolovertheirbladderandbowels.

Adults, too, must consider themselves worthyof love,friendship,andsuccessif theyaretobeloved,tomakefriends,andtoachievetheirgoals.Lowself-esteemismorecommoninpeoplewhohavebeenabusedaschildrenandinthosewithpsychiatricdisorders,includingdepression,anx-iety,alcoholism,anddrugdependence.Feelingalackof loveandencouragementasachildcanalsoleadtopoorself-esteem.Adultswithpoorself-esteem may unconsciously enter relation-ships that reinforce their self-perceptions andmaypreferandevenseekoutpeoplewhothinkpoorlyof them.

Oneof themostuseful techniques forbolster-ing self-esteem and achieving your goals isdeveloping the habit of positive thinking andtalking. While negative observations—such asconstant criticisms or reminders of the mostminor faults—canundermineself-image,posi-tiveaffirmations—compliments,kudos,encour-agements—haveprovedeffective inenhancingself-esteem and psychological well-being. Indi-viduals who fight off negative thoughts fare

Self-actualizationFulfillment of

one’s potential

Physiological needsFulfillment of needs for food, water, shelter,

sleep, sexual expression

Safety and securityAbility to protect oneself from harm

Love and affectionAbility to give and receive

affection; feeling of belonging

Self-esteemRespect for self,

respected by others

Figure 2.1 The Maslow PyramidTo attain the highest level of psychological health, you must first satisfy

your needs for safety and security, love and affection, and self-esteem.

Source: From Maslow, Abraham H.; Frager, Robert D. (Editor); Fadiman, James (Editor), Motivation and Personality, 3/e. Copyright © 1987. Reproduced by permission of Pearson Education, Inc., Upper Saddle River, New Jersey.





part of a community and when you confrontannoyancesandcriseswithgrace.Itinvolvesawillingnesstolearnandstretchandgrow,whichsometimes involvesdiscomfort. It requiresact-ingonlife,notmerelytakingitin.It’snotjoy,atemporary exhilaration, or even pleasure, thatsensualrush—althoughasteadysupplyof thosefeelings course[s] through those who seize theday.”11

Why pursue happiness? The answer goesbeyond the psychological benefits. As a meta-analysisof long-termstudieshasshown,happi-nessreducestheriskof dying—bothinhealthypeople and in those with diagnosed diseases.“Happiness is beneficial over and above theabsenceof misery,”researchershaveconcluded.The reason may be that happiness induceschanges in the brain or encourages strongersocialconnections.12

Happiness 101 Genetics, as research onthousands of sets of twins has demonstrated,accountsforabout50percentof yourhappinessquotientandforrelatedpersonalitytraits,suchasextraversionandconscientiousness.Butevenif youinheritedthefamilyfrownratherthanitsjoy genes, you’re not fated to a life of gloom.Just don’t pin your hopes on advantages likefitness, fortune, education,or good looks.Thehealthy,thewealthy,thebookish,andthebeau-tiful report only somewhat greater happinessthan thosewhoare lessblessed.Unless you’reextremelypoororgravelyill,lifecircumstancesaccount for only about 10 percent of happi-ness. The other 40 percent depends on whatyoudotomakeyourself happy.(SeeHealthonaBudget.)

Unfortunately,mostof uslookforhappinessinall thewrongplaces.Weassume that externalthings—abiggerhouse,abetterjob,awinninglotteryticket—willgladdenourlives.Whiletheydobringtemporarydelight,thethrillinvariablyfades.

In one study, more than 150 oldercollege students rated a recent pur-chase—eitherof anobjectorof alife

experience—thattheyinvestedintomakethem-selveshappy.Thosewhospenttheirmoneyonapleasurable experience reported feeling morealive and invigorated than those who boughtmaterial things. The reason, according to the

says Seligman. “We’re not talking about justfeelinggoodbutaboutsomethingmoresubstan-tialanddurable.Thenewestfindingof positivepsychologyisthatsimple,provenstrategiescanmake you lastingly happier. However, it’s noteasy,andit’snotobvioushowtogoaboutit.”

As researchers and therapists agree,happinessismorethanasmileyface.Ratherthanasuper-ficial sense of glee, true happiness “has depthanddeliberationtoit,”asonewriterputit.“Itencompasses living a meaningful life, utilizingyour gifts and your time, living with thoughtandpurpose.It’smaximizedwhenyoualsofeel

Health on a Budget

Happiness for Free!Money can’t buy happiness. As

long as you have enough money

to cover the basics, you don’t

need more wealth or more pos-

sessions for greater joy. Even

people who win a fortune in a

lottery return to their baseline

of happiness within months. So

rather than spending money on

lottery tickets, try these ways to

put a smile on your face:

• Make time for yourself. It’s

impossible to meet the needs of

others without recognizing and

fulfilling your own.

• Up your appreciation quotient.

Regularly take stock of all the

things for which you are grate-

ful. To deepen the impact, write

a letter of gratitude to someone

who’s helped you along the

way.

• String beads. Think of every

positive experience during the

day as a bead on a necklace.

This simple exercise focuses

you on positive experiences,

such as a cheery greeting from

a cashier or a funny e-mail from

a friend, and encourages you to

act more kindly toward others.

• Create a virtual DVD. Visualize

several of your happiest memo-

ries with as much detail as pos-

sible. Smell the air. Feel the sun.

Hear the sea. Play this video

in your mind when your spirits

slump.

• Fortify optimism. Whenever

possible, see the glass as half-

full. Keep track of what’s going

right in your life. Imagine and

write down your vision for your

best possible future and track

your progress toward it.

• Immerse yourself. Find activi-

ties that delight and engage

you so much that you lose track

of time. Experiment with cre-

ative outlets. Look for ways to

build these passions into your

life.

• Seize the moment. Rather

than waiting to celebrate big

birthday- cake moments, savor

a bite of cupcake every day.

Delight in a child’s cuddle, a

glorious sunset, a lively conver-

sation. Cry at the movies. Cheer

at football games. This life is

your gift to yourself. Open it!





sharedonedistinctivecharacteristic:arichandfulfillingsociallife.Almostallwereinvolvedinaromanticrelationshipaswellasinrewardingfriendships. The happiest students spent theleasttimealone,andtheirfriendsratedthemashighestongoodrelationships.

Evenpeoplewedon’tknowmaymakeushappy.Byanalyzing20yearsof dataonthesocialtiesof almost5,000participantsintheFraminghamHeartStudy,researchersfoundthathappypeo-plespreadhappinesstoothers.Spouses,neigh-bors, relatives, and friends benefit most, butsodidmoredistantcontacts.Themorehappypeopleyousurroundyourself with,thehappieryou—andyoursocialnetwork—arelikelytobeinthefuture.

This may also be true online—atleasttoacertainextent.Accordingtoa recent study of college students,

theirfeelingsof well-beingincreasealongwiththenumberof theirFacebookfriends—perhapsbecauseseeingfriends’photosremindsthemof theirsocialconnectionsandenhancestheirfeel-ingsof self-worth.However,theFacebookuserswhopresented themselveshonestlyweremorelikelytoreceivemeaningfulsocialsupportfromtheir online friends than those who, as theresearchersputit,werealways“hidingbehindasmiling Facebook mask.”15 (See Chapter 5 formoreonsocialnetworking.)

researchers,isthatlifeexperiencesbringpeoplecloser,satisfyanaturalhumanneedforconnec-tion,andcreatememories thatcanbesavoredagainandagain.13

“After18yearsstudyinghappiness,Ifellintothesame trap as everyone else,” says psychologistSonjaLyubomirsky,Ph.D.,authorof The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want.“Iwassoexcitedtogetanewcar,ahybridI’dwantedforalongtime,butwithintwomonthsdrivingitbecameroutine.Happinessislikeweightloss.Weallknowhowtotakeoff afewpoundsbutthetrickismaintainingit.”14

Lyubomirskyandhercolleagueshavefine-tunedprovenstrategiesintopracticalprescriptionstoenhance happiness. “Different methods are abetter ‘fit’ for different people,” she explains.“Keepingadailygratitudejournalseemshokeytosomepeople,butwritingaletterof gratitudemaybeverymeaningful.”Timingand“doses”alsomatter.Performingfiveactsof kindnessona singleday, she’s found, yields a greaterhaloeffectthanasingledailyaltruisticgesture.“Buttosustainhappinessyouhavetomaketheeffortandcommitmenteverydayfortherestof yourlife,”sheemphasizes.Forenduringjoy,thekeyislookingbeyondfleetingpleasurestothetwopil-larsof “authentic”happiness:engagementwithfamily,work,orapassionatepursuitandfindingmeaningfromsomehigherpurpose.

Education,intelligence,gender,andracedonotmattermuchforhappi-ness. African Americans and His-

panicshavelowerratesof depressionthanwhiteAmericans,buttheydonotreportgreaterhap-piness.Neithergenderisclearlyhappier,butindifferent studies women are both happier andsadderthanmen.

Inarecentstudyof collegestudents,possessionsmatteredlesstotheirper-sonal satisfaction than how much

theyvaluedthem.“TheAmericanundergradu-ateswhoarehappiestinthislifearenotneces-sarily those who amass great numbers of things,” the researchers concluded. “Ratherthey are those who both have the things theywantandwantthethingstheyhave.”

Inanothersurveyof 222collegestudents,psy-chologistsfoundthatthe“happiest”10percent,as determined by six different rating scales,

Health and wealth

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ourviewof theworldforhoursordays.Accord-ingtosurveysbypsychologistRandyLarsenof theUniversityof Michigan,badmoodsdescendupon us an average of three out of every tendays. “A few people—about 2 percent—arehappyjustabouteveryday,”hesays.“About5percentreportbadmoodsfouroutof everyfivedays.”18

Therearegenderdifferencesinmoodmanage-ment: Men typically try to distract themselves(apartiallysuccessfulstrategy)orusealcoholordrugs (an ineffective tactic). Women are morelikelytotalktosomeone(whichcanhelp)ortoruminate on why they feel bad (which doesn’thelp).Learningeffectivemood-boosting,mood-regulating strategies can help both men andwomenpullthemselvesupandoutof anemo-tionalslump.

Themosteffectivewaytobanishasadorbadmoodisbychangingwhatcauseditinthefirstplace—if you can figure out what made youupset and why. “Most bad moods are causedby lossor failure inworkor intimate relation-ships,”saysLarsen.“Thequestionstoaskare:What can I do to fix the failure? What can Idotoremedytheloss?IsthereanythingundermycontrolthatIcanchange?If thereis, takeactionandsolveit.”Rewritethereport.Asktotake a makeup exam. Apologize to the friendwhose feelingsyouhurt.Tellyourparentsyoufeelbadabouttheargumentyouhad.

If there’snothingyoucando,acceptwhathap-penedandfocusondoingthingsdifferentlynexttime. “In our studies, resolving to try harderactuallywasaseffectiveinimprovingmoodastakingactioninthepresent,”saysLarsen.Youalsocantrytothinkaboutwhathappenedinadifferentwayandputapositivespinonit.Thistechnique,knownascognitive reappraisal, or refram-ing,helpsyou lookatasetback inanewlight:Whatlessonsdiditteachyou?Whatwouldyouhave done differently? Could there be a silverliningorhiddenbenefit?

If you can’t identify or resolve the problemresponsible for your emotional funk, thenext-bestsolutionistoconcentrateonalteringyournegative feelings. For example, try setting aquick,achievablegoalthatcanboostyourspir-itswithasmallsuccess.Cleanoutadrawer;sortthroughthepilesof paperonyourdesk;sendane-mailortextmessagetoanoldfriend.

Become OptimisticThedictionarydefinesoptimismas“anincli-nationtoanticipatethebestpossibleoutcome.”For various reasons—because they believe inthemselves,becausetheytrustinahigherpower,because they feel lucky—optimistsexpectposi-tive experiences from life. When bad thingshappen, they tend to see setbacks or losses asspecific,temporaryincidents.Intheireyes,adis-appointmentis“oneof thosethings”thathap-penseveryonceinawhile,ratherthanthelatestin a long string of disasters. And rather thanblamingthemselves(“Ialwaysmessthingsup,”pessimistsmightsay),optimistslookatallthedif-ferentfactorsthatmayhavecausedtheproblem.

Asresearchoverthelastfewdecadeshasconsis-tentlyshown,optimistsandpessimistsdiffer inhowtheyconfrontproblemsandhowtheycopewith adversity. These differences affect theirphysical and psychological well-being. Peoplewho expect good things respond to difficultyandadversityinmoreadaptivewaysthanthosewhoexpectbadthings.

In terms of health, optimists not only expectgood outcomes—for instance, that a surgerywill be successful—but take steps to increasethis likelihood.Pessimists, expecting theworst,are more likely to deny or avoid a problem,sometimes by drinking or other destructivebehaviors.Optimismitself mayprotectagainstdisease.Inthelarge-scaleWomen’sHealthIni-tiative, which studied 95,000 women over aneight-year period, optimists were significantlyless likelytodevelopcoronaryheartdiseaseortodieof heartdiseaseoranyothercause.16

Individuals aren’tbornoptimisticorpessimistic; in fact, researchers havedocumentedchangesovertimeinthe

ways that individuals view theworld andwhattheyexpecttoexperienceinthefuture.Cognitive-behavioral techniques (discussed in Chapter 3)have proven effective in helping pessimistsbecomemoreoptimistic.Inastudywithcollegestudents,learningtodecreaseautomaticnegativethoughts and increase more constructive onesreducedepisodesof moderatedepression.17

Manage Your MoodsFeelingscomeandgowithinminutes.Amoodisamoresustainedemotionalstatethatcolors

optimism The tendency to seek out, remember, and expect pleasurable experiences.

mood A sustained emotional state that colors one’s view of the world for hours or days.





autonomy The ability to draw on internal resources; inde-pendence from familial and societal influences.

locus of control An individual’s belief about the sources of power and influence over his or her life.

spiritual health The ability to identify one’s basic purpose in life and to achieve one’s full potential.

spirituality A belief in some-one or something that tran-scends the boundaries of self.

originating—isinternal(fromwithinthemselves)ratherthan external(fromothers).

Spiritual HealthWhateveryourfaith,whetherornotyoubelongtoanyformalreligion,youaremorethanabodyof acertainheightandweightoccupyingspaceontheplanet.Youhaveamindthatequipsyoutolearnandquestion.Andyouhaveaspiritthatanimateseverythingyousayanddo.Spiritual health refers to thisbreathof lifeand toourabilitytoidentifyourbasicpurposeinlifeandto experience the fulfillment of achieving ourfullpotential.Spiritualreadingsorpracticescanincreasecalmness,innerstrength,andmeaning;improveself-awareness;andenhanceyoursenseof well-being. Religious support has also beenshowntohelplowerdepressionandincreaselifesatisfaction beyond the benefits of social sup-portfromfriendsandfamily.

Spirituality is a belief in what some call ahigher power, in someone or something thattranscends the boundaries of self. It gives riseto a strong sense of purpose, values, morals,and ethics. Throughout life you make choicesand decide to behave in one way rather thananotherbecauseyourspiritualityservesasbothacompassandaguide.

The term religiosity refers to various spiritualpractices.Thatdefinitionmayseemvague,but

Anothergoodoptionistogetmoving.Instudiesof moodregulation,exerciseconsistentlyranksasthesinglemosteffectivestrategyforbanish-ing bad feelings. Numerous studies have con-firmed that aerobicworkouts, such aswalkingor jogging, significantly improve mood. Evennonaerobicexercise,suchasweightlifting,canboostspirits;improvesleepandappetite;reduceanxiety,irritability,andanger;andproducefeel-ingsof masteryandaccomplishment.

Look on the Light SideHumor,whichenablesus to express fears andnegativefeelingswithoutcausingdistresstoour-selves or others, is one of the healthiest waysof copingwith life’supsanddowns.Laughterstimulatestheheart,altersbrainwavepatternsandbreathingrhythms,reducesperceptionsof pain, decreases stress-related hormones, andstrengthenstheimmunesystem.

Jokingandlaughingarewaysof expressinghon-estemotions,of overcomingdreadanddoubt,and of connecting with others. They also candefuse rage.After all, it’s almost impossible tostayangrywhenyou’relaughing.Totickleyourfunny bone, try keeping a file of favorite car-toonsorjokes.Gotoacomedyclubinsteadof amovie.If yougetane-mailjokethatmakesyoulaughoutloud,don’tkeepittoyourself—multi-plythemirthbysharingitwithafriend.

Develop AutonomyOnegoalthatmanypeoplestriveforisauton-omy, or independence. Both family andsociety influence our ability to grow towardindependence. Autonomous individuals aretrue to themselves. As they weigh the prosandconsof anydecision,whetherit’susingorrefusing drugs or choosing a major or career,theybasetheir judgmentontheirownvalues,not those of others. Their ability to draw oninternalresourcesandcopewithchallengeshasa positive impact on both their psychologicalwell-beingandtheirphysicalhealth,includingrecoveryfromillness.

Thosewho’veachievedautonomymayseektheopinionsof others,buttheydonotallowtheirdecisionstobedictatedbyexternal influences.For autonomous individuals, their locus of control—that is, where they view control as

Volunteering to help

others, like these

students serving

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profound sense of life

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goingtochurchaddyearstoalife?Researchersspeculate that the reasonmaybe the senseof community or support or that people feel lessdepressedwhentheyjoininreligiousservices.21

Prayerandotherreligiousexperiences, includ-ingmeditation,mayactuallychangethebrain—forthebetter.Usingneuroimagingtechniques,scientists have documented alterations in vari-ouspartsof thebrainthatareassociatedwithstress and anxiety. This effect may slow downthe aging process, reduce psychological symp-toms,andincreasefeelingsof security,compas-sion,andlove.22

In a recent study, undergraduates with higherlevels of spirituality coped with challenges by“turning to religion” along with other practi-cal problem-solving strategies, such as positivereframing,acceptance,andhumor.Thisimpliesthatstudentswhoarealreadyreligioususetheirspirituality tobolsterresources to focuson theproblemathand.Thosewhodidnotscorehighin spiritualitybut turned to religion ina crisisweremorelikelytodosoasawayof avoidingordenyingtheproblem,alongwithsuchmaladap-tive strategies as trying to distract themselvesfromit.23

Deepen Your Spiritual IntelligenceMentalhealthprofessionalshaverecognizedthepowerof spiritual intelligence,whichsomedefine as “the capacity to sense, understand,andtapintothehighestpartsof ourselves,oth-ers,andtheworldaroundus.”Spiritualintelli-gence,unlikespirituality,doesnotcenterontheworshipof aGodabove,butonthediscoveryof awisdomwithin.

Allof usarebornwiththepotentialtodevelopspiritualintelligence,butmostof usaren’tevenaware of it—and do little or nothing to nur-ture it. Part of the reason is that we confusespiritual intelligence with religion, dogma, orold-fashioned morality. “You don’t have to gotochurchtobespirituallyintelligent;youdon’teven have to believe in God,” says ReverendPaul Edwards, a retired Episcopalian ministerand therapist in Fullerton, California. “It is ascientificfactthatwhenyouarefeelingsecure,at peace, loved, and happy, you see, hear,and act differently than when you’re feeling

one thing is clear. According to thousands of studies on the relationship between religiousbeliefsandpracticesandhealth,religiousindi-viduals are less depressed, less anxious, andbetterabletocopewithcrisessuchasillnessordivorce than are nonreligious ones. The morethat a believer incorporates spiritual prac-tices—suchasprayer,meditation,orattendingservices—intodaily life, the greaterhis orhersenseof satisfactionwith life. Individualswithreligiousaffiliationsarelesslikelytoattemptsui-cidethanothers.19

Spirituality and Physical HealthAgrowingbodyof scientificevidenceindicatesthatfaithandspiritualitycanenhancehealth—andperhaps evenextend life. Individualswhoprayandreportgreaterspiritualwell-beingcon-sistentlydescribethemselvesasenjoyinggreaterpsychologicalandoverallwell-being.20

Church attendance may account for an addi-tional two to three years of life (by compari-son,exercisemayaddthreetofiveextrayears),according toresearchers’calculations.Accord-ingtodataonnearly95,000participantsinthelandmarkWomen’sHealthInitiative,attendingaweeklychurchservice,regardlessof an indi-vidual’s faith, lowers the risk of death by 20percent,comparedwiththosewhodon’tattendatall.Attendinglessfrequentlyalsoreducestherisk, but by a smaller percentage. How does

Giving and getting

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spiritual intelligence The capacity to sense, understand, and tap into ourselves, others, and the world around us.





percentages are somewhat lower than in thepast,butagrowingnumberof studentsreportfrequentdiscussionsof religion.

Whatever role religion plays in your life, youhave the capacity for deep, meaningful spiri-tual experiences that can add great meaningtoeverydayexistence.Youdon’tneedtoenrollintheologyclassesorcommittoacertainreli-giouspreference.Thefollowingsimplestepscanstartyouonaninnerjourneytoanewlevelof understanding:

• Sit quietly.Theprocessof cultivatingspiritualintelligencebeginsinsolitudeandsilence.“Thereisaninnerwisdom,”saysDr.DeanOrnish,thepioneeringcardiolo-gistwhoincorporatesspiritualhealthintohismind-bodytherapies,“butitspeaksvery,verysoftly.”Totuneintoitswhisper,youhavetoturndownthevolumeinyourbusy,noisy,complicatedlifeandforceyourself todonothingatall.Thismaysoundeasy;it’sanythingbut.

• Start small.Createislandsof silenceinyourday.Don’treachfortheradiodialassoonasyougetinthecar.Leaveyourear-budsonasyouwalkacrosscampusbutturnoff themusic.Shutthedoortoyourroom,takeafewhugedeepbreaths,andletthemoutvery,veryslowly.Don’tworryif you’retoobusytocarveouthalf anhourforquietcontemplation.Eventenminuteseverydaycanmakeadifference.

• Step outside.Formanypeople,naturesetstheirspiritfree.Beingoutdoors,walk-ingbytheocean,orlookingatthehillsgivesusasenseof timelessnessandputsthelittlehasslesof dailylivingintoperspective.Asyouwaitforthebusorforatrafficlighttochange,letyourgazelingeronsilveryiceglazingabranchoranazaleabushinwildbloom.Followtheflightof abird;watchcloudsfloatoverhead.Gazeintothenightskyandthinkof thestarsasholesinthedarknesslettingthelightof heavenshinethrough.

• Use activity to tune into your spirit.Spiritualityexistsineverycellof thebody,notjustinthebrain.Asastudent,youdevotemuchof yourdaytomentallabor.Totapintoyourspirit,tryalesscerebralactivity,suchassinging,chanting,dancing,ordrumming.Alternativewaysof quieting

insecure,unhappy,andunloved.Spiritualintel-ligenceallowsyoutousethewisdomyouhavewhenyou’reinastateof innerpeace.Andyougettherebychangingthewayyouthink,basi-callybylisteninglesstowhat’sinyourheadandmoretowhat’sinyourheart.”24

Clarify Your ValuesYourvaluesarethecriteriabywhichyoueval-uate things, people, events, and yourself; theyrepresent what’s most important to you. In aworldof almostdizzyingcomplexity,valuescanprovideguidelinesformakingdecisionsthatareright foryou. If understoodandapplied, theyhelpgivelifemeaningandstructure.

Therecanbealargediscrepancybetweenwhatpeople say they value and what their actionsindicate about their values. That’s why it’simportant to clarify your own values, makingsure you understand what you believe so thatyoucanliveinaccordancewithyourbeliefs.

When you confront a situation in which youmustchoosedifferentpathsorbehaviors,followthesesteps:

1. Carefullyconsidertheconsequencesof eachchoice.

2. Choosefreelyfromamongalltheoptions.

3. Publiclyaffirmyourvaluesbysharingthemwithothers.

4. Actoutyourvalues.

Values clarification is not a once-in-a-lifetimetask,butanongoingprocessof sortingoutwhatmattersmosttoyou.If youbelieveinprotectingtheenvironment,doyoushutoff lights,orwalkratherthandrive,inordertoconserveenergy?Do you vote for political candidates who sup-portenvironmentalprotection?Doyourecyclenewspapers,bottles,andcans?Valuesaremorethan ideals we’d like to attain; they should bereflectedinthewaywelivedaybyday.

Enrich Your Spiritual LifeDoyouattendreligiousservices?Prayormedi-tateonaweeklybasis? Inanational survey,amajorityof themembersof theClassof 2011answered yes: Eight in ten went to religiousservices frequently or occasionally, while athird prayed or meditated every week. These

values The criteria by which one makes choices about one’s thoughts, actions, goals, and ideals.





orimagecanslowheartrate,respiration,andbrainwaves;relaxmuscles;andlowerstress-relatedhormones—responsessimilartothoseinducedbyprayer.

Consider the Power of PrayerPrayer, a spiritual practice of millions, is themost commonly used form of complemen-tary and alternative medicine. However, onlyin recent years has science launched rigorousinvestigationsof thehealingpowerof prayer.

Petitionaryprayer—prayingdirectlytoahigherpower—affectsboththequalityandquantityof life, saysDr.HaroldKoenig,directorof DukeUniversity’sCenter for theStudyof Religion/SpiritualityandHealth.“Itboostsmorale;low-ersagitation,loneliness,andlifedissatisfaction;andenhancesabilitytocopeinmen,women,theelderly,theyoung,thehealthy,andthesick.”25

People who pray regularly have significantlylowerbloodpressureandstrongerimmunesys-tems than the less religious, says Dr. Koenig.They’re also less prone to alcoholism and lesslikelytosmokeheavily,andarehospitalizedlessoften.Sciencecannotexplainthephysiologicalmechanismsforwhathappensinhumanbeingswhen they pray, but in cultures around theworldthroughoutrecordedhistorywhenpeopleortheirlovedonesaresick,theypray.

Some scientists speculate that prayer may fos-ter a state of peace and calm that could leadtobeneficialchangesinthecardiovascularandimmune systems. Sophisticated brain imagingtechniques have shown that prayer and medi-tation cause changes inblood flow inparticu-larregionsof thebrainthatmayleadtolowerblood pressure, slower heart rate, decreasedanxiety, and an enhanced sense of well-being.Membershipinafaithcommunityprovidesanidentityaswellassupport,althoughindividualsvaryintheirreligiouspracticesandobservances.

In recent research, praying for others has notimproved their symptoms or recovery. In astudyof patientsundergoingheartprocedures,prayers(whetherbyChristian,Muslim,Jewish,orBuddhistgroups)andothercomplementarybedside therapies, such as imaging and thera-peutic touching, did not measurably improvetheiroutcome.

yourmindandtuningintoyourspiritincludegardening,walking,arrangingflowers,lis-teningtomusicthattouchesyoursoul,orimmersingyourself inasimpleprocesslikepreparingameal.

• Ask questions of yourself.Somepeopleusetheircontemplativetimetofocusonalineof scriptureorpoetry.Othersaskopen-endedquestions,suchasWhatamIfeeling?Whataremychoices?WhereamIheading?Dr.Ornishendshisowndailymeditationsbyasking,“WhatamInotpayingattentiontothat’simportant?”

Inhermeditations,oneministeroftenpaintsalushscenewithagoldenmeadow,ashadetree,andagentlebrookandinvitesthedivinespirittoenter.“RarelydoIgetanimmediateanswerorsolution,butlaterthatdaysomethingmayhappen—oftenjustarandomconversation—andIsuddenlyfindmyself thinkingaboutaproblemfromaperspectiveIneverconsideredbefore.”

• Trust your spirit.Whilemostof usrelyongutfeelingstoalertustodanger,ourinnerspiritusuallynudgesus,notawayfrom,buttowardsomeactionthatwillsomehowleadtoagreatergood—evenif wecan’tseeitatthetime.Youmaysuddenlyfeeltheurgetocallore-mailafriendyou’velosttouchwith—onlytodiscoverthathejustlostalovedoneandneededthecomfortof yourcaring.If youignoresuchsilentsignals,youmaylookbackandregrettheconsequences.Payalittlemoreattentionthenexttimeyoufeelanunexpectedneedtosayordosome-thingforsomeone.

• Develop a spiritual practice.

• If you are religious:Deepenyourspiri-tualcommitmentthroughprayer,morefrequentchurchattendance,orjoiningaprayergroup.

• If you are not religious:Keepanopenmindaboutthevalueof religionorspirituality.Considervisitingachurchorsynagogue.Readthewritingsof inspiredpeopleof deepfaith,suchasRabbiHaroldKushnerandRev.MartinLutherKing,Jr.

• If you are not ready to consider religion:Trynonreligiousmeditationorrelaxationtraining.Researchhasshownthatfocusingthemindonasinglesound





feelbetterabouttheirlivesasawhole,aremorelikely tohavemadeprogress toward importantpersonal goals, exercise more regularly, andreportfewernegativehealthsymptoms.27

Men and women differ in the ways they per-ceive, experience, and express gratitude. Ingeneralwomenviewgratitudeaslesscomplex,uncertain,andconflictingandasmoreinterest-ingandexcitingthanmendo.Inresearchwithcollege students, women responded to a giftwith more gratitude and less sense of burdenandobligationthanmen.28

The reasons may be thatwomenaremoreemotion-ally expressive and, withthe exception of anger,experience emotions moreintensely and frequentlythanmen.Incross-culturalstudies women’s most im-portant values were un-derstandingandimprovingrelationships, while menrated power and achieve-ment as higher priorities.Becausetheyexpressmoregratitude,womenaremorelikely to receive additionalbenefits, whether in theformof nurturingormate-rial possessions, from theirbenefactors.29

Inthelasttwodecadesgrat-itudehasemergedasoneof themostsignificantdimen-sions of positive psychol-ogy.Traditionallygratitudehasbeendefinedasappreciationforthehelpfulactions of others. However, psychologists havebroadenedthisdefinitiontoinclude“ahabitualfocusingonandappreciatingthepositiveaspectsof life.”30 The “lifestyle orientation” of feelinggrateful has been shown to reduce levels of stressovertimeandmaybeespeciallyeffectiveinpromotinggoodsleep(discussedlaterinthischapter).

Amongthemosteffective“gratitudeinterventions”—proven techniquesforincreasingappreciation—iskeep-

ingadiaryandrecordingthreethingsyouaregrateful for every day. In clinical studies, this

Willscienceeverbeabletoprovethepowerof prayer?Nooneiscertain.“WhileIpersonallybelieve that God heals people in supernaturalways,Idon’tthinksciencecanshapeastudytoproveit,”saysDuke’sDr.Koenig.“Butwenowknowenough,basedonsolidscientificresearch,to recommend prayer, much like exercise anddiet,asoneof thebestandmostcost-effectivewaysof protectingandenhancinghealth.”

Cultivate GratitudeAgratefulspiritbrightensmood,boostsenergy,and infuses daily living with a sense of gladabundance. Although giving thanks is anancient virtue, only recently have researchersfocusedon the“trait”of gratitude—apprecia-tion,notjustforaspecialgift,butforeverythingthatmakeslifeabitbetter.

Gratitude is what researchers call“thequintessentialpositivepersonal-ity trait, being an indicator of a

worldvieworientatedtowardnoticingandappre-ciatingthepositiveinlife.”Gratefulpeoplefeelmore frequent and intense positive emotions,havemorepositiveviewsof theirsocialenviron-ment, use more productive coping strategies,sleepbetter,andappreciate their livesandpos-sessionsmore.26Collegestudentswhokeepgrati-tude journals reporthigher levels of optimism,

Your Strategies for Change

Be True to Yourself

• Take the tombstone test: What would you like to have written on your tomb-stone? In other words, how would you

like to be remembered? Your honest

answer should tell you, very succinctly,

what you value most.

• Describe yourself, as you are today, in a brief sentence. Ask friends or

family members for their descriptions

of you. How would you have to change

to become the person you want to be

remembered as?

• Try the adjective test: Choose three adjectives that you’d like to see asso- ciated with your reputation. Then list

what you’ve done or can do to earn

such descriptions.

Prayer, a spiritual

practice of millions of

people, is the most

widely used form of

complementary and

alternative medicine.

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from theGreek for lettinggo, and that’swhathappenswhenyouforgive:Youletgoof alltheangerandpainthathavebeendemandingyourtimeandwastingyourenergy.

To some people, forgiveness seems a sign of weaknessorsubmission.Peoplemayfeelmorein control, more powerful, when they’re filledwithanger,butforgivinginstillsamuchgreatersense of power. Forgiving a friend or familymember may be more difficult than forgivingastrangerbecausethehurtoccursinacontextin which people deliberately make themselvesvulnerable.33

When you forgive, you reclaim your power tochoose. It doesn’t matter whether someonedeservestobeforgiven;youdeservetobefree.However, forgiveness isn’t easy. It’s not a one-timethingbutaprocessthattakesalotof timeand work involving both the conscious andunconsciousmind.34Mostpeoplepassthrough

approach has proven as effective as the rigor-ouslydevelopedand tested techniquesused inpsychotherapy.31 (See further discussion of thisin Chapter 3.) In experiments with students,expressions and displays of gratitude not onlyincreased the helpers’ sense of self-worth bymakingthemfeelvaluedbutalsospurredthemtodomoretohelpothers.32

ForgiveWhile“Iforgiveyou”maybethreeof themostdifficultwordstosay,theyarealsothreeof themost powerful—and the most beneficial forthebodyaswellas thesoul.Beingangry,har-boring resentments, or relivinghurts over andoveragainisbadforyourhealthingeneralandyourheartinparticular.Thewordforgivecomes

Helping or giving to

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How to Forgive

• Compose an apology letter. Address it

to yourself, and write it from someone

who’s hurt you. This simple task enables

you to get a new perspective on a pain-

ful experience.

• Leap forward in time. In a visualization

exercise imagine that you are very old,

meet a person who hurt you long ago,

and sit down together on a park bench

on a beautiful spring day. You both talk

until everything that needs to be said

finally is. This allows you to benefit from

the perspective time brings without hav-

ing to wait for years to achieve it.

• Talk with “safe” people. Vent your anger

or disappointment with a trusted friend

or a counselor without the danger of

saying or doing anything you’ll regret

later. And if you can laugh about what

happened with a friend, the laughter

helps dissolve the rage.

• Forgive the person, not the deed. In

themselves, abuse, rape, murder, and

betrayal are beyond forgiveness. But you

can forgive people who couldn’t man-

age to handle their own suffering, misery,

confusion, and desperation.





duringtheweek,with20percentof thesesleep-inglessthan6hoursanight.36

Inadequate sleephasbeen linked toahostof problems,includingmentaldistress,depression,anxiety, obesity, hypertension, diabetes, highcholesterol, and riskybehaviors suchas smok-ing, physical inactivity, and heavy drinking.Drowsy drivers are responsible for almost 20percentof allseriouscarcrashinjuries.

Sleepy StudentsCollege students, notorious forerraticsleeppatterns,maybesleep-ierthanever.Inthelastdecadethe

average sleep time of an undergraduatedecreasedfrom7hours45minutesto7hours.Inarecentstudy,studentsreportedsleepinganhour less than their ideal total sleep time; 43percentsleptlessthanfivehoursanightatleastonce a week.37 Cadets at the U.S. MilitaryAcademyaverage less than5.5hoursof sleeponallschoolnights.38(Toseehowyoucompare,see “How Do You Compare?: Student NightLife.”)

Themostcommonsleepproblemsoncampusare sleep deprivation and excessive daytimesleepiness, which can stem from many causes.Like other adolescents, undergraduates still intheirteensmayhavewhatscientistscall“delayedsleepphase”andnotfeelsleepyinthelateeve-ning.Anestimated59percentof youngadultsbetweenages18and29describethemselvesas

several stages in their journey to forgiveness.Theinitialresponsemayinvolveanger,sadness,shame,orothernegativefeelings.Later,there’sareevaluationof whathappened,thenrefram-ingtotrytomakesenseof itortotakemitigat-ingcircumstancesintoaccount.Thismayleadtoareductioninnegativefeelings,especiallyif theinitialhurtturnsouttobeaccidentalratherthanintentional.

Sleepless on CampusYoustayuplatecrammingforafinal.Youdrivethrough the night to visit a friend at anothercampus.Yougetupforanearlyclassduringtheweekbut stay inbeduntilnoononweekends.And you wonder: “Why am I so tired?” Theanswer:You’renotgettingenoughsleep.

You’re hardly alone. According to a recentreportbytheCenters forDiseaseControlandPrevention, only one-third of Americans saythey get enough sleep. An estimated 50 to 70millionAmericanadults suffer from sleepandwakefulnessdisorders.Womenaremore likelythan men to report not getting enough sleep.African Americans reported getting less sleepcomparedwithallotherethnicgroups.35

Inanationalsurvey,43percentof respondentsreported sleeping less than 7 hours a night

How Do You Compare?

StuDent nigHt Life

Weekday bedtime 12:20 a.m.Weekday wake time 8:25 a.m.Weekend bedtime 1:34 a.m.Weekend wake time 10:30 a.m.

Weekday total sleep time 7 hours 33 minutesWeekend total sleep time 8 hours 33 minutesTime to sleep onset 21.12 minutesWake time during the night 7 minutesTime awake before rising 16 minutesBased on a survey of 1,039 undergraduates.

How Do You Compare?For a three-day period (including one weekend day), keep track of your bedtimes, wake times, and total sleep time. Also rate how energetic or tired you feel upon getting out of bed on a scale of

1 to 10, with 1 for “exhausted” and 10 for “completely energized.” Record your notes in your online journal.





day.43Collegestudentsarenotoriousforstayingup late to studyand socializeduring theweekandsleepinginonweekends.

In a national survey, three-quarters of under-graduates reported occasional sleep problemswhile12percentexperiencedpoor sleepqual-ity.Themostcommoncomplaintsaregeneralmorning tiredness and insomnia (Table 2.1).Risk behaviors linked with poor sleep includefighting, suicidal thoughts, smoking, and alco-holuse.44

On average college students go to bed 1 to 2hourslaterandsleep1to1.6hourslessthanstu-dentsof agenerationago.Whencomparedtoexhaustionlevelsreportedbyworkersinvariousoccupations, college students score extremelyhigh.

Sleepaffectsacademicperformance.Inarecentstudyof undergraduates,thestudentsreportingthepoorestsleepqualityhadlowergradesthanthosewhosleptbetter.45

Fortunately,college studentscan learn to sleepbetter.Inanexperimentwithintroductorypsy-chologystudents—mostlyfreshmen—thosewholearnedbasicsleepskillssignificantlyimprovedtheir overall sleep quality compared with stu-dentswhodidnotreceivesuchtraining.

Sleep’s Impact on HealthSleepisessentialforfunctioningatyourbest—physically and psychologically. The followingaresomeof thekeywaysinwhichyournight-timesleepaffectsyourdaytimewell-being.

• Learning and memory.Whenyousleep,yourbrainhelps“consolidate”newinforma-tionsoyouaremorelikelytoretainitinyourmemory.

• Metabolism and weight. Thelessyousleep,themoreweightyoumaygain.Chronicsleepdeprivationmaycauseweightgainbyalteringmetabolism(forexample,changingthewayindividualsprocessandstorecarbohydrates)andbystimulatingexcessstresshormones.Lossof sleepalsoreduceslevelsof thehormonesthatregulateappetite(discussedinChapter6),whichmayencourageeating.

• Safety.Peoplewhodon’tgetadequatenighttimesleeparemorelikelytofallasleep

“nightowls”whostayuplateandhavedifficultygettingupearlyinthemorning.39

Students also may not get adequate sleepbecauseof late-nightstudyingorsocializing,anoisyresidencehallorapartment,oranunder-lyingsleepdisorder(discussedlaterinthischap-ter).Manytrytomakeupforsleeplossduringthe week by sleeping more on weekends—anaverageof 2.6hoursinarecentsurvey.40

Inarecentstudyof 1,845undergraduates,86percentreportedwakinguptiredatleastsomeof thetime,and27percenthadsometypeof sleepdisorder.Themostcommonwasinsomnia,whichaffected15percentof undergraduates.41

Toolittlesleepcanaffecteveryaspectof astu-dent’slife,includingmoods,physicalwell-being,performance inclassandontests,andgrades.StudentswithsleepdisordersaremorelikelytohavelowerGPAsandpooreracademicperfor-mance,possiblybecauseof daytimesleepiness,lowerlevelsof attention,andimpairedmemoryanddecisionmaking.

Some students turn to medications and othersubstances either to sleep at night or to feelmorealert in theday.About5percentof stu-dentsuseprescriptionsleepaidsanaverageof two nights a week. Two percent use over-the-counter sleep aids, while 11 percent of thosewhousealcoholhaveadrinktohelpfallasleep.Toboostalertness,60percentof undergradu-atesusesomeformof stimulant,includingcaf-feinatedbeverages.42

Sleep problems start young. Nearlyone-half of adolescents sleep lessthan eight hours on school nights;

morethanhalf reportfeelingsleepyduringthe

Health in the Headlines

Sleep ProblemsSleep problems have become an epidemic on college campuses and throughout the country. Research is revealing new insights into sleep and sleep disorders. Access the “Sleep Disorders” portal of Global Health Watch (found under Health & Wellness then Mental Health & Wellness) and scan the latest news. Then go to your online journal and comment about what you learned. Do you think sleep problems impact your health?

Table 2.1 Sleepy Students

• Took more than 30 minutes to fall asleep 18%

• Had insomnia in the last three months 28%

• Have difficulty falling asleep three or more days a week 11%

• Have disturbed sleep three or more days a week 11%

• Have nocturnal wakings three or more times a week 13%

• Awakened too early three or more days a week 11%

• Have general morning tiredness 82%

• Used sleep medication at least once a week in past three weeks 2%

Source of data: Vail-Smith, Karen, et al. “Relationship between Sleep Quality and Health Risk Behaviors in Undergraduate College Students.” College Student Journal, Vol. 43, No. 3, 2009.





• Cardiovascular health.Inafive-yearstudyof middle-agedmenandwomen,anextrahourof shut-eyewaslinkedwithhealthierarteriesandlessbuild-upof calcium.Serioussleepdisorderssuchasinsomniaandsleepapneahavebeenlinkedtohypertension,increasedstresshormonelevels,irregularheartbeats,andincreasedinflammation(which,asdiscussedinChap-ter9,mayplayaroleinheartattacks).

• Immunity/cancer prevention.If yougetlessthansevenhoursof sleepanight,you’rethreetimesmorelikelytocatchacold.Andif yousleeppoorly,you’refivetimesmoresusceptible.47Sleepdeprivationaltersimmunefunction,includingtheactivityof thebody’skillercells.Forexample,inad-equatesleepatthetimeof afluvaccinationcanreducetheproductionof flu-fightingantibodies.Keepingupwithsleepmayalsohelpfightcancer.Harvardresearchershaveshownthatwomenwhoworkatnightareatincreasedriskforbreastandcoloncancer,possiblybecauselightatnightaltersproduc-tionof melatonin,ahormonethathelpsputustosleep.48

What Happens When We Sleep?Anormalnightof sleepconsistsof severaldis-tinct stages of sleep, divided into two majortypes: an active state, characterized by rapid eye movement (REM)andcalledREM sleep(ordreamsleep),andaquietstate,referredtoasnon-REMorNREMsleep,thatconsistsof fourstages:

• In Stage 1,atwilightzonebetweenfullwakefulnessandsleep,thebrainproducessmall,irregular,rapidelectricalwaves.Themusclesof thebodyrelax,andbreathingissmoothandeven.

• In Stage 2, brainwavesarelargerandpunctuatedwithoccasionalsuddenburstsof electricalactivity.Theeyesarenolongerresponsivetolight.Bodilyfunctionsslowstillmore.

• Stages 3 and 4constitutethemostpro-foundstateof unconsciousness.Thebrainproducesslower,largerwaves,andthisissometimesreferredtoas“delta”orslow-wavesleep(Figure2.2).

duringthedaytime.Daytimesleepinesscancausefalls,medicalerrors,airtrafficmishaps,androadaccidents.

• Mood/quality of life. Toolittlesleep—whetherjustforanightortwoorforlongerperiods—cancausepsychologicalsymptoms,suchasirritability,impatience,inabilitytoconcentrate,moodiness,andloweredlong-termlifesatisfaction.46Poorsleepalsoaffectsmotivationandabilitytoworkeffectively.Growingevidencesuggeststhatdisturbedsleepisassociatedwithincreasedriskof psychiatricdisorders.

• Life satisfaction.Sleep-depriveduniversitystudentsscoreloweronlife-satisfactionscales.

Studentswhogeteighthoursof sleepbutshifttheirsleepschedulesbyaslittleastwohourssuffermoredepressivesymptoms,lowersociability,andmorefrequentatten-tionandconcentrationproblems.Theyevengetlowergrades.


How to Sleep Better

• Keep regular hours for going to bed and

getting up in the morning. Stay as close

as possible to this schedule on weekends

as well as weekdays.

• Develop a sleep ritual—such as stretch-

ing, meditation, yoga, prayer, or reading

a not-too-thrilling novel—to ease the

transition from wakefulness to sleep.

• Don’t drink coffee late in the day. The

effects of caffeine can linger for up to

eight hours. And don’t smoke. Nicotine

is an even more powerful stimulant—and

sleep saboteur—than caffeine.

• Don’t rely on alcohol to get to sleep. Alcohol disrupts normal sleep stages, so

you won’t sleep as deeply or as restfully

as you normally would.

• Although experts generally advise against daytime napping for people who have problems sleeping at night, a recent study of college students found

that a 30-minute “power nap” lowers

stress and refreshes energy with no

disruption in nighttime sleep. (See “Sleep

Power” in Labs for IPC.)

rapid eye movement (REM) sleep Regularly occurring periods of sleep during which the most active dreaming takes place.





economic cost of sleeplessness may be higherthan$300millionayear.

Insomnia Individuals with insomnia—alack of sleep so severe that it interferes withfunctioningduringtheday—maytossandturnfor an hour or more when they get into bed,wakefrequentlyinthenight,wakeuptooearly,ornotbeabletosleeplongenoughtofeelalertandenergetic thenextday.Mostoften insom-nia is transient, typically occurring before orafteramajorlifeevent(suchasajobinterview)and lasting for three or four nights. Duringperiodsof prolongedstress(suchasamarriagebreakup), short-term insomnia may continueforseveralweeks.Chronicorlong-terminsom-nia,whichcanbeginatanyage,maypersistforlongperiods.Aboutthree-fourthsof insomniacsstruggletosleepmoreforatleastayear;almosthalf,forthreeyears.49

Foraboutathirdof thosewithchronicinsom-nia, the underlying problem is a mental dis-order, most often depression or an anxietydisorder. Many substances, including alcohol,medications,anddrugsof abuse,oftendisruptsleep. About 15 percent of those seeking helpfor chronic insomnia suffer from “learned” or“behavioral” insomnia.Whilea life crisismaytrigger their initial sleep problems, each nighttheytryharderandhardertogettosleep,butthey cannot—although they often doze off whilereadingorwatchingamovie.

Sleepingpillsmaybeusedforaspecific,time-limited problem—always with a physician’ssupervision.(SeeConsumerAlert,p.50.)Inthelongterm,behavioralapproaches,includingthefollowing,haveprovedmoreeffective:

• Relaxation therapy, whichmayinvolveprogressivemusclerelaxation,diaphragmaticbreathing,hypnosis,ormeditation.

• Cognitive therapy, whichchallengesmisconceptionsaboutsleepandhelpsshiftapoorsleeper’smindawayfromanxiety-inducingthoughts.

• Stimulus control therapy, inwhichindi-vidualswhodonotfallasleepquicklymustgetupandleavetheirbedsuntiltheyareverysleepy.

• Sleep restriction therapy, inwhichsleeptimesaresharplycurtailedinordertoimprovethequalityof sleep.

Afteraboutanhourinthefourstagesof non-REM sleep, sleepers enter the time of vividdreaming called REM sleep, when brainwaves resemble those of waking more thanthoseof quiet sleep.The largemusclesof thetorso,arms,andlegsareparalyzedandcannotmove—possibly to prevent sleepers from act-ingouttheirdreams.Thefingersandtoesmaytwitch; breathing is quick and shallow; bloodflow through the brain speeds up; men mayhavepartialorfullerections.

Sleep DisordersThreeof fourAmericansstruggletogetagoodnight’ssleepatleastafewnightsaweek.Accord-ingtotheNationalCommissiononSleepDis-ordersResearch,40millionadultssufferfromaspecificsleepdisorder,suchaschronicinsomniaor sleepapnea;anadditional20 to30millionhaveoccasionalsleepdifficulties.Theestimated

Stage 1

Stage 2

Stage 3

Stage 4

REM sleep

Figure 2.2 Stages of SleepDifferences in brain wave patterns characterize the various stages of sleep.

© h

emer

a.co

m





and alcohol and immediately switching to thenewtimezone’sschedulecanhelpinovercom-ingjetlag.

A“shiftwork”circadianrhythmdisordercon-sistsof anyinabilitytosleepwhenonewantsortostayalertwhenneededbecauseof frequentlychangingworkshifts.Behavioralstrategiesandgoodsleephabitscanhelp.Inaddition,photo-therapy—exposure to bright light for periodsranging from 30 minutes to two hours—hasshown promise as an experimental treatmentto help shift workers adjust to their changingschedules.

How Much Sleep Do You Need?Overthelastcentury,wehavecutouraveragenightlysleeptimeby20percent.Morethanhalf of ustrytogetbywithlessthansevenhoursof shut-eyeanight.Collegestudentsarenoexcep-tion,withanaveragesleeptimeslightlylessthansevenhours,withlittledifferencebetweenmenandwomen.

No formula can say how long a good night’ssleepshouldbe.Normalsleeptimesrangefromfivetotenhours;theaverageissevenandahalf.Aboutoneortwopeopleinahundredcangetbywithjustfivehours;anothersmallminorityneeds twice thatamount.Eachof us seemstohave an innate sleep appetite that is as much apartof ourgeneticprogrammingashaircolorandskintone.

Tofigureoutyoursleepneeds,keepyourwake-uptimethesameeverymorningandvaryyourbedtime.Areyougroggyaftersixhoursof shut-eye?Doesanextrahourgiveyoumorestamina?Whataboutanextratwohours?Sincetoomuchsleepcanmakeyoufeelsluggish,don’tassumethatmoreisalwaysbetter.Listentoyourbody’ssignals, and adjust your sleep schedule to suitthem.

Areyoubetteroff pullinganall-nighterbeforeabigtestorclosingthebooksandgettingagoodnight’s sleep? According to researchers, thatdependsonthenatureof theexam.If it’satestof facts—CivilWarbattles,forinstance—cram-mingallnightworks.However,if youwillhavetowriteanalyticalessaysinwhichyoucompare,contrast, and make connections, you need tosleeptomakethemostof yourreasoningabilities.

Breathing Disorders (Snoring and Sleep Apnea) Althoughmostpeoplesnoreincertainpositionsorwhentheyhavestuffed-up noses, snoring can be a sign of a seriousproblemandincreasesthelikelihoodof healthproblems and of accidents.50 Caused by thevibrationintissuesinthemouthandthroatasa sleeper tries to suckair into the lungs, snor-ingcanbesoloudthatitdisruptsabedpartnerorothers in the samehouse. Inyoungpeople,thecauseismostlikelytobeenlargedtonsilsoradenoids.Inadults,extremesnoringmaybeasymptom of sleep apnea, which may itself beharmfultohealth.

TranslatedfromtheGreekwordsmeaning“no”and“breath,”apneaisexactlythat:theabsenceof breathing for a brief period. People withsleepapneamaybriefly stopbreathingdozensorevenhundredsof timesduringthenight.Astheystruggleforbreath,theymaygaspforair,snoreextremelyloudly,orthrashabout.

Althoughapnea,whichcanleadtohighbloodpressure, stroke, and cardiovascular disease,may affect as many as 10 million Americans,mostareunawareof theproblem.Morephysi-calactivityandfewerhourssittingcanleadtoimprovements.51 Effective treatments includeweight loss (if obesity is contributing to theproblem), a nasal mask that provides continu-ouspositiveairwaypressure(CPAP)toensureasteadyflowof airintothelungs,and,inseverecases,surgerytoenlargetheupperairway.

Movement Disorders Restless legs syn-drome,whichmayaffect12millionAmericans,isamovementdisordercharacterizedbysymp-tomsthatpatientsdescribeaspulling,burning,tingling, creepy-crawly, grabbing, buzzing, jit-teriness, or gnawing. Many people with thesesymptoms have difficulty falling or stayingasleepbutdonotrealizethatthecauseisamed-ical disorder that can be treated with regularphysicalactivity.Medicationsalsoareavailable.

Circadian Rhythm Sleep Disorders Problemsinvolvingthetimingof sleeparecalledcircadianrhythmdisordersbecausetheyaffectthebasiccircadian(“aboutaday”)rhythmthatinfluencesmanybiologicalprocesses.Themostcommon causes are jet lag and shift work. Jetlaggenerallyimprovesonitsownwithintwotosevendays,dependingonthelengthof thetripandtheindividual’sresponse.Avoidingcaffeine





• Over-the-counter medications.Variousover-the-countersleepingpills,soldinanypharmacyorsupermarket,containantihista-mines,whichinducedrowsinessbyworkingagainstthecentralnervoussystemchemicalhistamine.Theymayhelpforanoccasionalsleeplessnight,butthemoreoftenyoutakethem,thelesseffectivetheybecome.

• Dietary supplements.Themostwidelypublicizeddietarysupplementisthehor-monemelatonin,whichmayhelpcontrolyourbody’sinternalclock.Themelatoninsupplementsmostoftenfoundinhealthfoodstoresandpharmaciesaresyntheticversionsof thenaturalhormone.Althoughthesesupplementsmayhelpsomepeoplefallasleeporstayasleepandmaysometimeshelppreventjetlag,therearemanyunan-sweredquestionsaboutmelatonin.Reportedsideeffectsincludedrowsiness,headaches,stomachdiscomfort,confusion,decreasedbodytemperature,seizures,anddruginter-actions.Theoptimaldoseisn’tcertain,andthelong-termeffectsareunknown.Othersupplements—suchasvalerian,chamomile,andkava—haveyettobefullystudiedforsafetyoreffectivenessinrelievinginsomnia.

• Prescription medications.Thenewestsleepdrugs—nonbenzodiazepinehypnoticmedicationssuchasLunesta(eszopiclone),Ambien/AmbienCR(zolpidem),andSonata(zaleplon)—quietthenervoussystem,whichhelpsinducesleep.They’remetabo-lizedquickly,whichhelpsreducetheriskof sideeffectsthenextday.Thesemedicationsaremainlyintendedforshort-termorinter-mittentuse.

• Benzodiazepines,suchasHalcion(triazolam)andRestoril(temazepam),belongtoanolderclassof sleepingpillsthataremorelikelytocausedrowsinessorheadachesthenextmorning.Theyalsomaybecomehabitforming.

TheFDAhasrequiredstrongerlanguageaboutthe potential risks of both nonbenzodiaze-pine and benzodiazepine sleeping pills. Theseinclude severe allergic reactions and complexsleep-relatedbehaviors, includingsleep-driving(driving while not fully awake after taking asleepingpillwithnomemoryof thedriving).

Sleeping PillsTheuseof prescriptionsleepingpillshasmorethandoubledsince2000,andincreasingnum-bers of teenagers and young adults use thesemedications either occasionally or regularly.(SeeConsumerAlert.)Anevengreaternumberbuynonprescriptionorover-the-counter(OTC)sleepinducers.Othersrelyonherbalremedies,antihistamines,andothermedicationstogettosleep.

In the long run, good sleep habits, regularexercise,anda tranquil sleepenvironmentarethe cornerstones of high-quality sleep. But if circumstances, travel, injury, or illness havedisrupted your sleep, you may consider sleepmedications. Here is what you need to knowaboutthem.

CONSUMERALERT

Sleeping Pill Precautions

Chances are you’ve taken some form of sleep medication. After aspirin,

they are the most widely used drugs in the United States. If sleeping pills

seem the best option at a certain time in your life, use them with caution.

Facts to Know

• Sleeping pills are not a long-term solution to a sleep problem, but they

can be helpful if travel, injury, or illness interfere with your nightly rest.

• Prescription and over-the-counter sleep aids can interact with other

medications or a medical condition, so always check with your doctor

before taking them.

• If taken too often or for more than several nights, some sleeping pills

may cause rebound insomnia—sleeplessness that returns in full force

when you stop taking the medication.

Steps to Take

• Read carefully. Take time to read through the informational materials and

warnings on pill containers. Make sure you understand the potential risks

and the behaviors to avoid.

• Avoid alcohol. Never mix alcohol and sleeping pills. Alcohol increases the

sedative effects of the pills. Even a small amount of alcohol combined

with sleeping pills can make you feel dizzy, confused, or faint.

• Quit carefully. When you’re ready to stop taking sleeping pills, follow

your doctor’s instructions or the directions on the label. Some medica-

tions must be stopped gradually.

• Watch for side effects. If you feel sleepy or dizzy during the day, talk to

your doctor about changing the dosage or discontinuing the pills.





Keys to a Fulfilling Life

Just like physical health, psychological well-being involves morethananabsenceof problems.Bydevelopingyourinnerstrengthsandresources,youbecometheauthorof yourlife,capableof con-frontingchallengesandlearningfromthem.Aspositivepsycholo-gistshavediscovered,youhavegreatercontroloverhowhappy,optimistic,upbeat,andlovableyouarethananyoneoranythingelse.Butonlybyconsciously takingchargeof your lifecanyoufindhappinessandfulfillment.(See“YourPerfectBalancePoint”inIPC.)

Herearesomesuggestionstoenhanceyouremotionalhealthnowandinthefuture.Checktheonesthatyoualreadypracticeandthenworkonaddingothers.

_____ Recognize and express your feelings. Pent-up emo-tionstendtofesterinside,buildingintoangerordepression.

_____ Don’t brood. Ratherthanmerelymullingoveraproblem,trytofindsolutionsthatarepositiveanduseful.

_____ Take one step at a time.Aslongasyou’retakingsomeactiontosolveaproblem,youcantakeprideinyourabilitytocope.

_____ Spend more time doing those activities you know you do best. Forexample,if youareagoodcook,prepareamealforsomeone.

_____ Separate what you do, especially any mistakes you make, from who you are. Insteadof saying,“I’msostu-pid,” tellyourself,“Thatwasn’t thesmartestmoveIevermade,butI’lllearnfromit.”

_____ Use affirmations, positivestatementsthathelpreinforcethemostpositiveaspectsof yourpersonalityandexperi-ence.Everyday,youmightsay,“Iamaloving,caringper-son,”or“Iamhonestandopeninexpressingmyfeelings.”Writesomeaffirmationsof yourownonindexcardsandflipthroughthemoccasionally.

_____ List the things you would like to have or experi-ence. Constructthestatementsasif youwerealreadyen-joyingthesituationsyoulist,beginningeachsentencewith“Iam.”Forexample,“Iamfeelinggreataboutdoingwellinmyclasses.”

Build Your

Future

Well-Being Scale

Part I

The following questions contain statements and their opposites. Notice that the statements extend from one extreme to the other. Where would you place yourself

on this scale? Place a circle on the number that is most true for you at this time. Do not put your circles between numbers.

Self Survey

Life Purpose and Satisfaction

1. During most of the day, my energy level is very low 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 very high

2. As a whole, my life seems dull 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 vibrant

3. My daily activities are not a source of satisfaction 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 a source of satisfaction

4. I have come to expect that every exactly the same 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 new and different day will be

5. When I think deeply about life I do not feel there is any 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I feel there is a purpose to it purpose to it

6. I feel that my life so far has not been productive 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 been productive

7. I feel that the work* I am doing is of no value 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 is of great value

8. I wish I were different than who I am. agree strongly 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 disagree strongly

*The definition of work is not limited to income-producing jobs. It includes childcare, housework, studies, and volunteer services





9. At this time, I have no clearly defined goals for my life 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 clearly defined goals for my life

10. When sad things happen to me or other people I cannot feel 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I continue to feel positive about life positive about life

11. When I think about what I have done with my life, worthless 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 worthwhile I feel

12. My present life does not satisfy me 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 satisfies me

13. I feel joy in my heart never 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 all the time

14. I feel trapped by the circumstances of my life. agree strongly 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 disagree strongly

15. When I think about my past I feel many regrets 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I feel no regrets

16. Deep inside myself I do not feel loved 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I feel loved

17. When I think about the problems that I have I do not feel hopeful 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I feel very hopeful about solving them about solving them

Part II

Self-Confidence during Stress (Answer according to how you feel during stressful times.)

1. When there is a great deal of pressure being I get tense 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I remain calm placed on me

2. I react to problems and difficulties with a great deal of frustration 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 with no frustration

3. In a difficult situation, I am confident that disagree strongly 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 agree strongly I will receive the help that I need.

4. I experience anxiety all the time 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 never

5. When I have made a mistake I feel extreme dislike for myself 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I continue to like myself

6. I find myself worrying that something bad all the time 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 never is going to happen to me or those I love

7. In a stressful situation I cannot concentrate easily 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I can concentrate easily

8. I am fearful all the time 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 never

9. When I need to stand up for myself I cannot do it 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I can do it easily

10. I feel less than adequate in most situations. agree strongly 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 disagree strongly

11. During times of stress, I feel isolated and alone. agree strongly 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 disagree strongly

12. In really difficult situations I feel unable to respond in 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I feel able to respond positive ways in positive ways

13. When I need to relax I experience no peace—only 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I experience a thoughts and worries peacefulness—free of thoughts and worries

14. When I am frightened I panic 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 I remain calm

15. I worry about the future all the time 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 never

Scoring

The number you circled is your score for that question. Add your scores in each of the two sections and divide each sum by the number of questions in the section.

• Life Purpose and Satisfaction: ______ x 17 = _____.___

• Self-Confidence during Stress: ______ x 15 = _____.___

• Combined Well-Being: (add scores for both) ______ x 32 = _____.___

Each score should range between 1.00 and 7.00 and may include decimals (for example, 5.15).

Interpretation

VERY LOW: 1.00 TO 2.49

MEDIUM LOW: 2.50 TO 3.99

MEDIUM HIGH: 4.00 TO 5.49

VERY HIGH: 5.50 TO 7.00





These scores reflect the strength with which you feel these positive emotions. Do they make sense to you? Review each scale and each question in each scale. Your score on each item gives you information about the emotions and areas in your life where your psychological resources are strong, as well as the areas where strength needs to be developed.

If you notice a large difference between the LPS and SCDS scores, use this information to recognize which central atti-tudes and aspects of your life most need strengthening. If

your scores on both scales are very low, talk with a coun-selor or a friend about how you are feeling about yourself and your life.

Copyright 1989, Dr. Jared Kass, Inventory of Positive Psychological Attitudes.

The Well-Being Scale is the self-test version of the Inventory of Positive

Psychological Attitudes (IPPA-32) developed by Dr. Jared D. Kass. Reprinted

with the author’s permission. For information, contact: Dr. Jared Kass, Division

of Counseling and Psychology, Graduate School of Arts and Social Sciences,

Lesley University, Cambridge, MA 02138.

Making Change Happen

Soul FoodThere is more to you than intellect and passion, more than what resides between your ears or below your waist. Sometimes overshadowed by the speed and loud talk that surround you is the quieter, feeling part of you. Although immaterial, it is no less real. Tied to your spiri-tual self, it can be seen as your essence—what is always there and what is most essentially you.

If you feel you have been running too hard, need more down time, are close to burnout, or are in some way seek-ing to make better contact with your deeper self, “Soul Food” in Labs for IPC will help you provide the nourish-ment that your spirit needs. Here is a preview:

Get RealTo provide sound nutrition for the soul, you need to know what makes up such a diet. Here is the first step:

Assess your soul food diet.

For each of thirteen items, you will put a + (if you meet this daily requirement) or a − (if you don’t) in the space provided. Here are three examples:

• Movement: ____ You consciously and intentionally pay disciplined atten-

tion to the movement of your body, be it in some slow, mindful exercise like yoga or tai chi, or in dance, or in stretching or walking.

• Being: ____ You set aside a time when you are not multitasking—or

tasking at all. It is one thing to do, and there is much to do. It is another thing to focus on being. Being there, being you—not working, worrying, or calculating. In this sitting-on-the-stoop or front-porch mode, you attune yourself to being alive in the moment.

• Creating: ____ You daily take time to express your creative nature

through painting, drawing, writing, composing music, choreographing dance, solving a problem, cooking—the possibilities are inexhaustible.

If you did not mark a plus by many activities listed in the lab, your soul food diet is insufficient. Progressing through the stages of change by completing the lab will help you correct this. We guarantee you are going to love the results.

Get Ready We know that as a college student you are busy. You may need to cut or trim activities or reclaim time that currently goes to activities that do not feed your deeper, quieter self. Start with this step:

• Examine your schedule. When are you going to fit in, on a daily basis, time for soul food? Will your schedule require fine-tuning?

Get Going In this stage your task is to provide your-self with soul food by completing each of thirteen activities a minimum of four times per week. Here are three examples of the minimum dietary requirements for feeding your soul:

• Movement: 5 minutes

• Being: 10 minutes

• Creating: 10 minutes

Lock It InIt will take time and practice to lock in the habit of feeding your soul on a regular basis. This is why we offer the following advice:

• Regardless of how often you have or have not done the activities in this lab, most of them are likely to seem completely natural. But some may present a challenge. Do not be concerned about whether you are moving, being, creating, or doing any of the other activities cor-rectly. Just relax . . .





c. a trip to the place of your dreams.d. having more money than your friends and

neighbors.

7. Which activity is probably enriching the student’s spiritual life?a. Claire goes dancing with her friends.b. James takes a 15-minute walk along the river trail

with a group of friends every day.c. Kate keeps a gratitude journal.d. Charlie goes to a taize music group with friends.

8. Which of these statements about self-esteem is true?a. Self-esteem is determined by genetics.b. Parents have little influence on a child’s self-esteem.c. A person’s sense of self-esteem can change over

time.d. Self-esteem is seldom boosted by achievement.

9. People who pray regularlya. are less likely to get cancer.b. never get sick.c. recover from heart attacks more quickly.d. get better grades.

10. Individuals who have developed a sense of mastery over their lives area. aware that their locus of control is internal, not

external.b. skilled at controlling the actions of others.c. usually passive and silent when faced with a situa-

tion they don’t like.d. aware that their locus of control is external, not

internal.

Answers to these questions can be found on page 672.

childhood? Why or why not? If no, have you been to places of worship to explore religious practices? Why or why not?

3. What is your personal experience with lack of sleep? Have you suffered effects described in the text? Has cramming all night ever worked for you? Why or why not?

Making This Chapter Work for You

Review Questions 1. Lack of sleep

a. improves memory and concentration.b. may cause irritability.c. may cause weight loss.d. enhances the immune system.

2. Which statement about sleep is correct?a. People cannot learn to sleep better.b. People dream during REM sleep.c. Drinking alcohol helps most people sleep better.d. Snoring may be a symptom of insomnia.

3. Normal shyness can usually be overcome bya. medication.b. psychotherapy.c. retail therapy.d. working at improving social skills.

4. Psychological health is influenced by all of the following excepta. emotional health.b. physical agility.c. culture.d. a firm grasp on reality.

5. Which of the following activities can contribute to fulfillment?a. being a Big Sister or Big Brother to a child from

a single-parent homeb. being accepted by your first choice sorority or

fraternityc. being a regular participant in an Internet chat roomd. negotiating the price on a new car

6. Enduring happiness is most likely to come froma. winning a sweepstakes.b. work you love.

Critical Thinking 1. Would you say that you view life positively or nega-

tively? Would your friends and family agree with your assessment? Ask two of your closest friends for feedback about what they perceive are your typical responses to a problematic situation. Are these indica-tive of positive attitudes? If not, what could you do to become more psychologically positive?

2. Were you raised in a religious family? If yes, have you continued the same religious practices from your





• Coach you through identifying target goals for behav-ioral change and creating and monitoring your personal change plan throughout the semester using the Behavior Change Planner available in the CengageNOW resource.

guidance on spiritual practices, resources for people on spiritual journeys, and subscriptions to a bimonthly print magazine.

www.newvision-psychic.com/bookshelf/womenspirit .html A comprehensive list of books dealing with women and spirituality.

www.beliefnet.com An eclectic, informative guide to different forms of religion and spirituality.

Key TermsThe terms listed are used on the page indicated. Definitions of the terms are in the Glossary at the end of the book.

autonomy 39

culture 32

emotional health 32

emotional intelligence 33

locus of control 39

mental health 32

mood 38

optimism 38

rapid eye movement (REM) sleep 47

self-actualization 34

self-compassion 33

self-esteem 35

spiritual health 39

spiritual intelligence 40

spirituality 39

values 41

Media MenuVisit www.cengagebrain.com to access course materials and companion resources for this text that will:

• Help you evaluate your knowledge of the material.

• Allow you to prepare for exams with interactive quizzing.

• Use the CengageNOW product to develop a Personal-ized Learning Plan targeting resources that address areas you should study.

Internet Connectionswww.ppc.sas.upenn.eduThis positive psychology website at the University of Pennsylvania has questionnaires on authentic happiness and gratitude.

www.apa.org The APA is the scientific and professional organization for psychology in the United States. Its website provides up-to-date information on psychological issues.

www.spiritualityhealth.com Developed by the Publishing Group of Trinity Church, Wall Street in New York City, this website offers self-tests,




672

Making This Chapter Work for You

Chapter 2

1. b; 2. b; 3. d; 4. b; 5. a; 6. b; 7. c; 8. c; 9. c; 10. a

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This page contains qustions for this chapter only

681

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17. Ibid.18. Larsen,Randy.Personalinterview.19. Bhugra,D.“Commentary:Religion,Religious

AttitudesandSuicide.”International Journal of Epidemiology,Vol.39,No.6,October2010,pp.1496–1498.

20. Lawler-Row,K.A.,andJ.Elliott.“TheRoleofReligiousActivityandSpiritualityintheHealthandWell-BeingofOlderAdults.”Journal of Health Psychology,Vol.14,No.1,2009,pp.43–52.

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23. Edwards,Paul.Personalinterview.24. Krageloh,C.U.,etal.“HowReligiousCoping

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28. Kashdan,T.B.,etal.“GenderDifferencesinGratitude:ExaminingAppraisals,Narratives,theWillingnesstoExpressEmotions,andChangesinPsychologicalNeeds.”Journal of Personality,Vol.77,No.3,June2009.

29. Ibid.30. Wood,A.M.,etal.“GratitudeandWell-Being:

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40. Ibid.41. Ibid.42. TaylorandBramoweth,“PatternsandCon-

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