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At the end of the day I’ll know this conference has been a success for me if _____________________.
Overview
• Understanding your brain’s built-in hard-wired reward-and-planning system
• Asking 2 questions• Strategic behavioral inquiry: How exactly did
you do that?
Assumptions
• Everybody’s doing the best they can• Every behavior serves a function• Behavior is not incomprehensible or random• Behavior follows patterns which reveal
themselves to the curious observer free of prejudice or blame or theory
UNDERSTANDING YOUR BRAIN’S BUILT-IN HARD-WIRED REWARD-AND-PLANNING SYSTEM
Image: wikimedia commons
Image: wikimedia commons
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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We don’t do anything we’re not motivated to do
Dopamine is the neurotransmitter of:
• Reward• Motivation• Woo hoo!
• Pride• Success• Yay!
What does dopamine feeeel like?
Preferred States Inventory
1. Call to mind a “peak” moment– When was this?– Who was there?– Where were you?
2. Clarify sensory detail– What exactly did you see?– What were you hearing?– Was there texture? Temperature?– Were there smells?
Preferred States Inventory
3. Identify the highlight moment– What was the very best part of all that? If you had
to choose just one moment?
4. Say hello to your body – What were you feeling, in your body, right in the
middle of all that?– Where exactly – in your body – did you feel that?– What words would describe that feeling?
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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1. 1-step errands
2. Chores with cues
3. Basic inhibition
Age-appropriate ExpectationsPreschool
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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1. 2-3 step directions
2. 20-30 minute assignments
3. Follow rules/inhibit/no grabbing
Age-appropriate ExpectationsKindergarten -2nd Grade
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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1. Simple shopping list
2. Keep track of variable daily schedule
3. Inhibit and regulate even without teacher present
4. Simple delayed gratification (phone)
Age-appropriate Expectations3rd-5th Grade
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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1. Complex chores
2. Organizing system
3. Time management
4. Self soothe
5. Manage conflict
Age-appropriate Expectations6th – 8th Grade
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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1. Independent with assignments
2. Make adjustments based on feedback
3. Inhibit reckless behavior
4. Say “no” to fun activity if other plans already made
5. Take others’ perspective
Age-appropriate ExpectationsTeenage-mid 20’s
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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Age-appropriate ExpectationsLending Your Brain
Cortico-striatal loop
Cortico-striatal loop
The reward-and-planning system
The reward-and-planning system
• Anticipate goal (state)• Identify tasks• Sequence / problem-solve• Block out distractions• Get the reward
Ways the reward-and-planning system can go wrong
• Anticipate goal (state)• Identify tasks• Sequence / problem-solve• Block out distractions• Get the reward
Ways the reward-and-planning system can go wrong
• Anticipate goal (state)– Strategies: • Preferred States Inventory• Letter from the future• Look for the goal-behind-the-goal
Ways the reward-and-planning system can go wrong
• Identify tasks– Strategies:• Coaching• Interview someone who’s already done it• Vocational counseling• Weekly planning session
The best defense against the manipulation of our attention is to determine for ourselves – in advance - how we want to invest it.
- E. Goldberg
Ways the reward-and-planning system can go wrong
• Sequence / problem-solve– Strategies:• Coaching• Project management• Review your successes and strengths: What evidence
do you have that you CAN do this?• Psychotherapy• Morning 10-minute review• Mind-mapping software / apps
Image: Jim Mills @ photoxpress
Ways the reward-and-planning system can go wrong
• Block out distractions– Strategies:• Eliminate distractions• Increase salience (what’s in it for me?)• Morning 10-minute review• The Body Double• StayOnTask app
Increase salience
StayOnTask app
Ways the reward-and-planning system can go wrong
• Get the reward– Strategies• Maintain boundaries• Ask “what about this do I want?”• Get clear about your preferred states. Recognize
your unique body-based neurological blueprint for happiness. Be honest, own it.
“authority of the body”
38676
ASKING TWO QUESTIONS
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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Am I having fun now?Is this important?
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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YesYes
NoYes
YesNo
NoNo
Am I having fun now?Is this important?
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important?
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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(85 – X) x 365
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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fun?
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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Am I having fun now?Is this important?
When we focus on leading a passionate, meaningful life we create a spectacular ripple effect of inspiration in the lives around us.
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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YesYes
NoYes
YesNo
NoNo
I’m having fun.I’m on task.
Am I having fun now?
Is this important?
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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YesYes
NoYes
YesNo
NoNo
I’m having fun.I’m not on task.
Am I having fun now?
Is this important?
Weekly Planning Session
10-MinuteMorning Review
What will you do today that you'll still remember one year from now??
What’s your One Thing?
10-Minute Morning Review
10-Minute Morning Review
Take Advantage of Natural Breaks in Your Daily Routine
StayOnTask app
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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YesYes
NoYes
YesNo
NoNo
I’m not having fun.I’m on task.
Am I having fun now?
Is this important?
Increase salience
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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easy hard
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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easy hard
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Barter practical / social support
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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YesYes
NoYes
YesNo
NoNo
I’m not having fun.I’m not on task.
Am I having fun now?
Is this important?
STRATEGIC BEHAVIORAL INQUIRY
04/10/2023 © 2011 David D. Nowell, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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AANTECEDENTS
BBEHAVIOR
CCONSEQUENCE
S
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AANTECEDEN
T
BBEHAVIOR
CCONSEQUENC
ES
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AANTECEDENTS
BBEHAVIOR
CCONSEQUENC
ES
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AANTECEDEN
T
BBEHAVIOR
CCONSEQUENCES
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Beginning Middle End
…and How Exactly Did You Do That?
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More
• Behavioral control• Choices and options• Self-regulation– Arousal– Motivation– Mood
Objectives of SBI
• Specific behavioral strategy• What feeling-goals were associated with the
goal?• Motivational level on a scale from 1-10
Benefits of SBI
• Affirms the value of coachees’ unique internal experience
• Emphasizes the culture of self-regulation• Encourages metacognition
Assumptions of SBI
• Everybody’s doing the best they can• Every behavior serves a function• Behavior is not incomprehensible or random• Behavior follows patterns which reveal
themselves to the curious observer free of prejudice or blame or theory
How to “do” SBI
• HEDYDT?
HEDYDT?
• How • Exactly• Did• You• Do• That• ?
HEDYDT?
• How (a technology)• Exactly (a precise “recipe,” a sequence of
actions and thoughts and images)• Did (post-mortem)• You (accountability, reality-based)• Do (behavioral, practical)• That (situation-specific)• ? (open, genuinely curious inquiry)
Personal Application
• What habit or practice have you intentionally developed? And How Exactly Do You Do That?
• What bad habit persists? And How Exactly Do You Do That?
• End-of-day QI
Collect data – allow yourself to fall in love with the truth
Family/Social Application
• Think of the most important relationship in your life right now– What do you most admire about him/her?– If you had a magic wand, what might you change?– What could you do to improve the relationship by
10% in the next 24 hours?
Clinical Application
• What recurring behavioral problem is showing up in your clinic or classroom?
• Note: we aren’t asking “why did you do that,” but rather “how exactly did you do that.”
Appendix A
What’s your One Thing?
Appendix C
Summary
• Understanding your brain’s built-in hard-wired reward-and-planning system
• Asking 2 questions• Strategic behavioral inquiry: How exactly did
you do that?
Living in The Gap
• Compassion• Self-compassion
Let’s stay in touch!
Join my e-newsletter list:
Fill out a card today and drop it in the box.
Text to join: text DNSEMINARS to 22828
Sign up on my web site or Facebook page
Visit us on the web: www.DrNowell.com
davidnowell David Nowell Seminars