PraiseforANewOracleofKabbalah

“Jewish sages teach that each letter of the Hebrew alphabet is an awesomeuniverse. Richard Seidman gently guides readers to explore the use of theseletterstoopenmysteriousgatesofwisdomhiddenwithineachoneofus.OracleofKabbalahisanexcellenttoolfordiscoveringtheteachingsofourownsoulsandishighlyrecommended.”

–RabbiDavidA.Cooper,authorofGodisaVerb

“Thesecards,groundedinancientmysticalknowledge,offermanydoorwaystothe greatmysterious, and the power of our own personal truth. To experiencethemistorealizetheinfinitedepthandexquisitebeautyofcreation.”

–DavidCarson,co-authorofTheMedicineCards

“Youdon’thavetobeJewishtoloveOracleofKabbalah.RichardSeidmanhasmadetheancientwisdomandpoweroftheHebrewlettersaccessibletousall,sowecanuseittohelpusbetterdealwiththechallengesofmodernlife.”

–MonteFarberandAmyZerner,authorsofTheEnchantedTarot

“Seidman’sOracle ofKabbalah is a feast of honey, humor, cultural diversity,andanoutrageousinsistenceonhope.ThoughwellrootedinindigenousJewishunderstandings, a thousand flowers of theworld’s teachersmake this personaldivinationstyleonethatpromotestheDivineinNatureandcommunitywithoutlosingthenobilityoftheindividual.”

–MartínPrechtel,authorofTheSmellofRainonDust:GriefandPraise

“In thesewide-ranging,mystical, sometimes fancifulmeditationson the lettersof the Hebrew alphabet, Richard Seidman introduces the reader to acontemporaryinstallmentofbothJudaism’smillennialloveaffairwiththelettersoftheHebrewalphabetandacleverinvitationtoentertheconversation.”

–RabbiLawrenceKushner,authorofTheBookofLetters

“RichardSeidmanoffersusadirect,clear,andpracticalapproachtotheDivineMystery. His understanding of the Hebrew Aleph Beit and his guidance ininterpreting each letter ignites an inner lamp that can illumine the mostshadowedcornersofthesoul.”

–RabbiRamiM.Shapiro,authorofTheWayofSolomon

AUTHOR’SNOTEWith gratitude to the trees of thisworld, the authorwill donate a portion of the profits of each book toFriendsofTreesinPortland,Oregon,USA,tosupporttheplantingofnewtrees.

All rights reserved.Copyright©2015byRichardSeidman.Nopart of this bookmaybe reproducedortransmitted in any form or by any means whatsoever, including graphic, electronic, or mechanical,including photocopying, recording, taping, or by any information storage or retrieval system, withoutpermissionfromthepublisher.

White Cloud Press books may be purchased for educational, business, or sales promotional use. Forinformation,pleasewrite:

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CoverartandHebrewcalligraphybyShoshannahBrombacherCoverandinteriordesignbyChristyCollins,CBookServices

Firstedition:20151516171819 10987654321

LibraryofCongressCataloging-in-PublicationDataSeidman,Richard,author.AneworacleofKabbalah:mysticalteachingsoftheHebrewletters/RichardSeidman.pagescm

“ThiseditionofOracleofKabbalahisarevisedandexpandedversionofthebookthatwasfirstpublishedin2001”--Preface.ISBN978-1-93595-283-11. Hebrew language--Alphabet--Religious aspects--Judaism. 2. Cabala. 3. Spiritual life--Judaism. I.Title.PJ4589.S4182015492.4’11--dc23

2015025633

Tomy father, Herbert Seidman, andmymother, Phoebe Seidman.May theirmemoriesbeblessings.

ToAryehHirschfield,belovedrebbeofblessedmemory.

To all our ancestors, no matter their tribes or original homelands, whoseindigenous voiceswere silenced, butwhose songs and stories stillmight echothroughus.

And,withallmylove,toRachaelResch.

CONTENTSAcknowledgments

BuyingorMakingYourOwnHebrewLetterDeck

ForewordbyRabbiRamiM.Shapiro

Prefacetothe2015Edition

Prefacetothe2001Edition

Introduction

TheLettersofCreation

InspiringtheLanguage:BreathandtheAbsenceofVowelsinAncientHebrew

DivinationinJudaism:AbominationorSourceofDivineGuidance?

ANewOracleofKabbalahandDivination

TheArtofConsultingANewOracleofKabbalah

Chapter1: ALEPH

Chapter2: BEIT

Chapter3: GIMMEL

Chapter4: DALET

Chapter5: HEI

Chapter6: VAV

Chapter7: ZAYIN

Chapter8: CHT

Chapter9: TET

Chapter10: YUD

Chapter11: KAF

Chapter12: LAMED

Chapter13: MEM

Chapter14: NUN

Chapter15: SAMECH

Chapter16: AYIN

Chapter17: PEH

Chapter18: TZADI

Chapter19: KUF

Chapter20: RESH

Chapter21: SHIN

Chapter22: TAV

Chapter23:THEMISSINGLETTER

Glossary

Bibliography

Permissions

Notes

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Abby Layton’s inspiring example and generous spirit enabled me to find aJewishpath.Thisbookwouldnotexistifnotforherinfluence.

IamgratefultoRabbiAryehHirschfield,ofblessedmemory,forhisinitialinspiring presence and his continued guidance. For months, during the rainyOregonwinter,heandIwouldmeeteachweektoreadthroughmymanuscriptchapterbychapter.RabbiAryehhelpedcorrecttheHebrew,clarifiedconfusingpoints,andofferedmanyhelpfulsuggestions.

I thankmywife, RachaelResch, for unfailing love, staunch support,wiseperspective, brilliant insights, skillful editing, artistic vision, and for happytimes.

Iamgratefulfor the loveandsupportofmymother,PhoebeSeidman,andmyfather,HerbertSeidman.Maytheybothrestinpeace.

Ilan Shamir’s enthusiasm and perspective helped guide the early writing.Manyotherfriendsprovidedimportantfeedbackandencouragement, includingGordonQuinlan, JohnCiminello,RuthResch,Nelson Foster,DonnaRedisch,Aki Fleshler, Alon Raab, Hank Stratton, Ron Marson, Pat Ferris, and SteveBerman.Howard Lanoff, Babs Smith, Pat Ciminello, and SharonDvorawereotherstalwartsupporters.Ithankthemallfortheirassistanceandfriendship.

IamgratefultomyteachersRobertAitken,NelsonFoster,MartínPrechtel,PaulRichards,andStephenVictor.Theirinfluencepervadesthesepagesandmylife.

DeborahandRabbiDavidZaslowhavebeengoodfriendsandsupporters.Thankyou toRabbi JuliaMelanieVaughns forherdeepknowledgeof the

Hebrewlettermysteriesandgeneroussharingofherexpertiseandwisdom.IoffergreatgratitudetoShoshannahBrombacherforherintimacywiththe

Hebrew letters and for her beautiful artwork that graces the book cover andcards.

DeepthankstoRabbiRamiShapiroforhisprofoundForeword.IappreciateproofreaderJillBailinandhermeticulousattentiontodetail.ThankyoutoSteveSchollandWhiteCloudPressforhelpingbringthisnew

editionoutintotheworld.Thankyou toall thehumansIhaveforgotten to thank, tomyancestors, to

the Angel of Writing, to the holy Hebrew letters themselves and theirdescendants, the letters of the Latin alphabet, and to all themany known andunknownbeingsandforceswhohaveconspiredtosingusintolifeandsingthisprojectintolife.

BUYINGORMAKINGYOUROWNHEBREWLETTERDECK

Oracle ofKabbalahwas originally conceived of and published as a book andcarddivinationset.IfyouwouldliketopurchaseadeckofHebrewlettercardsto accompany this book, please go to www.whitecloudpress.com orhttp://tinyurl.com/oracle-deck.

If you prefer to create your own set of Hebrew letter cards, visithttp://tinyurl.com/make-your-own-cards.

Youcanprintthelettersdirectlyontocardstockorgluethemontocards.Oryoucansendthefiletoaprintshopandhavethemprint,cut,andlaminatethecardsforyou.

Perhaps the easiest alternative is to simply draw each letter by hand andwriteitsnameonanindexcard.

Ifyouhaveanyquestionsorcommentsaboutthisprocess,pleasecontactmeatinfo@oracleofkabbalah.com.

Thanks,RichardSeidman

FOREWORDTOANEWORACLEOFKABBALAHBYRABBIRAMIM.SHAPIRO

Languageisavehicleofcreation.Itliftssomethingoutofnothing,andindoingsoinfusesitwithmeaning.

This is what Helen Keller discovered when Anne Sullivan continuallyspelled the wordw-a-t-e-r on her palm as she pumped actual water over herhand. This is what Torah reveals when she says: In the beginning of God’screating sky and earth, the earth was formless and barren, darkness alonecoveredthedeep,andGod’sbreathquiveredoverthesurfaceofthewaters,andGodsaid…(Genesis1:1–3).ThisiswhatthePsalmisttellsuswhenhesings:BythewordofGodtheuniversewasformed;all that iscomesfromthebreathofGod’smouth…ForGodspokeandrealitycametobe,(Psalm33:6,9).AndthisiswhatthepoetofJohn’sPrologueremindsuswhenhewrites:InthebeginningwastheWord,andtheWordwaswithGod,andtheWordwasGod(John1:1).

IntheTalmud,theanthologyofclassicalrabbiniclawandlore,welearnthatevery Friday afternoon in preparation for the Sabbath, Rabbis Hanina andHoshiah would create a “delicious calf” by combining the Hebrew letters for“calf”accordingtothesecretsrevealedinSeferYetzirah,themore-than-ancientBook of Formation (Sanhedrin 65b, 67b). Abraham, so we are told, used thesamemethodfromthesamebooktocreatethecalfheservedtotheangelswhocametotellhimofSarah’scomingpregnancy(Genesis18:7).

Thiswaspossiblebecause,asSeferYetzirahitselfmakesclear,Godformedthe letters of the Hebrew Aleph Beit as the building blocks of creation. TheAleph Beit in Judaism is the equivalent of quanta in physics and DNA inbiology.It is throughthe twenty-twolettersof theAlephBeit thatGodcreatedall reality: everything that was, is, and will ever be. Abraham, Hanina, andHoshiah knew how to combine these building blocks to make dinner.TheoreticallyyouandIcandothesame.

Personally,though,I’dratherordermyfoodfromamenuatafinerestaurantthan conjure it from theAleph Beit andSefer Yetzirah, but that doesn’tmeanknowing themystical depthsof theHebrew letters is of nouse tome.On the

contrary, while I have an abundance of food, I do not have an abundance ofwisdom,andthis—ratherthandinner—isthegreatergiftoftheAlephBeit.Andbecauseitisthegreatergift,RichardSeidman’swonderfulbook,ANewOracleofKabbalah:MysticalTeachingsof theHebrewLetters, is so important. It is,quite simply,a twenty-firstcenturySeferYetzirah;notamodern translationofthe ancient original, but a fresh and contemporary exploration ofmuch of thesamematerial,anexplorationoftheHebrewAlephBeitdesignednotforJewishmysticsalone,butforWisdomseekersofanyfaithandnone.

If your goal is to serve veal for Friday night dinner by conjuringwith thelettersayin,gimmel,andlamed(egel,theHebrewwordforcalf),ortobypassthelong years it takes to earn a doctorate in physics or biology bymastering thetwenty-two letters of theHebrewAlephBeit to uncover the secrets of theBigBangandBefore,youaregoing tobeverydisappointed inSeidman’sbook.ANewOracle of Kabbalah:Mystical Teachings of theHebrew Letters isn’t fordiningordoctorates.It’sfordivingintotheWisdomthatwasatthebeginning;theWisdomthatwaswithGod;theWisdomthatisGod.

ANewOracleofKabbalahisawelcomingdoorwayintothetransformativepower of theHebrewAleph Beit.Mr. Seidman’s insights into the letters, andShoshannahBrombacher’sartistic renderingof the letters in theaccompanyingcarddeck,bringthegeniusandbeautyoftheAlephBeittoanyonewhodesiresit.Together they inviteyou intoan interiorworldof silenceandprimal soundoutofwhichtheuniversegrowslikearoseonarosebush.But,aswiththerose,thereisbothbeautyandthorn.

Thebeauty—bothphilosophicalandartistic—Iwillletyoudiscoveronyourown.Read thebook;meditateon thecards;youwillseewhatyoucan;andasyourgazesoftensyourseeingsharpensandyouwillcometoknowevenmore.Butregardingthethorns,letmeofferthiscaveat:theAlephBeitismorepoetrythanprose.

InHebrewthewordsforword,speech,andthingshareasingleroot:dalet-beit-resh (d-v-r). In theHebrewmind theword and the thing are inextricable.WhenGod said “Light!” light happened. Itwasn’t thatGod said “Light!” andthen light happened. There was no then, no lag in time between saying andbeing. The word, speaking the word, and the object spoken of by that wordhappenedinthesameinstance.FortheJew,beingishappening,andtheDivineBeing,whoseveryName,Y-H-V-H,isaformoftheHebrewverb“tobe,”isthehappeningofall,inall,withall,asall.WhatissoofGod,however,isnotsoofus.

Forusthereisalinkbetweenanobjectanditsname,butnotanequivalence.The wordmilk cannot satisfy a baby’s thirst. The word fire cannot scorch asingle twig. This is what Lao Tzu reminds us in the opening of his Tao TeChing:Thetaothatcanbespelled,thetaothatcanbespoken,isnotthetruestTao(TaoTeChing1:1).

While I encourage you to learn the letters of the Aleph Beit, I warn youagainst falling under their spell. It is not an accident that we speak ofmagicspells . . . spells are spelling . . . combining letters, making words, craftingrealities.To fall under their spell is to fall into the trap of literalism: tomakemagicofasubtlermysticism,andproseofasubtlerpoetry.

Youmustalwaysleaveroomnotonlyfortheunsaid,butalsotheunsayable:theTaothatcannotbespelledorspoken.ThisiswhythefirstletteroftheAlephBeitissilent;remindingyouthatallthatfollowsisbutanechooftheunsaidandunsayable.

This is why Seidman and Brombacher needed to collaborate: the lettersspeak to the left side of the brain, the pictures to the right, and together theyinvite a whole-mindedness that can discover theWisdom as soundlessWord.Thisiswhyyouneedtoreadthebookandcontemplatetheimages.IadmireANewOracleofKabbalah:MysticalTeachingsoftheHebrewLettersforwhatitteaches; I recommend it for what it does: opening you to the silent breathquivering over the depths of chaos just before the birth of sound and thehappeningthatislife.

RabbiRamiShapiroChristmasDay2014

PREFACETOTHE2015EDITION

This edition ofOracle of Kabbalah is a revised and expanded version of thebookthatwasfirstpublishedin2001.

Writing this bookwas an act of holy chutzpah onmy part as I am by nomeansan“expert”inKabbalah.ButIamabletosynergizedivergentpathsandmake arcane teachings accessible to many people. Perhaps my “beginner’smind”givesthismaterialafreshfeeling,onethatappealstobothJewsandnon-Jews,andwhichhasprovidedinspirationandguidancetomanyreaderssincetheinitialpublication.

When the remaining inventoryof the first edition, about4,000copies,wasaccidentallydestroyedbyanerroratthepublisher’swarehouse,therightstothebookrevertedtome.Ifeelthatnowisthetimetobringthisbodyofworkbacktolife,resurrectedfromtheashessotospeak,tosproutbackintotheworld.

Iwrote theoriginaleditionbetween1997and1999.Since1999,muchhaschangedformepersonallyand,ofcourse,fortheworld.

JustthreedaysaftertheOracle’soriginalpublication,9/11tookplacewhenthetwotowersof theWorldTradeCenter inmyhometownofNewYorkCityweredestroyedbyterrorists.Thebookfounditswayintotheworldduringthistimeofcollectivetraumaandsorrow,andthenduringtheviolentreactionofthemisguided war in Iraq, which proved once againMartín Prechtel’s point thatgrief,un-metabolized,inevitablyturnstoviolence.

I remember the people who have passed away during these last fourteenyears.There’sanAfricanproverbthateldersarewisebecausetheyknowmoredead people. By that standard, I have gained in wisdom since the originalpublication.

Mymother,PhoebeSeidman,diedinAugust2008.MybrotherandIandourwiveswereblessedtobewithherasshetookherlastbreath.Herfinalwordstomewere,“Haveagoodtrip.”

Afewmonthslater,afriendfromearlychildhoodtookhisownlife.Soonafter that,RabbiAryehHirschfield, themain inspirationformybook

andmyconnectiontoJewishmysticism,drowned,leavinghundredsofstudents

andfriendsandcongregants,aswellashisfamily,suddenlybereft.Even though I wasn’t young in the 1990s when I wrote the first edition,

whenIlookbacktothatperiodofmylife,Iseemtomyselfnaive,actingasifIhad all the time in the world. Now, with both of my parents dead and mybelovedrabbinolongerinthisworld,andbeingclosertoninetyyearsoldthantothirty,Ihaveamoreacutesenseofthepassageoftimeandofthestrangenessandpreciousnessoflife.

Ihavealsostudiedmoreinthesepastfourteenyears.Formostofthattime,ItrainedwithPaulRichards,agiftedseer,author,andteacher,whodeepenedmyunderstanding of energetic presence and empowerment and of the energeticrealmsthatexistparalleltothephysicalandmentalones.

MartínPrechtel’sschoolinNewMexico,Bolad’sKitchen,hasbeenaplaceof profound investigation into the syndrome of fleeing and diaspora anddisplacement that has affected all the world’s peoples, not only Jews, forthousands of years, and is mirrored by the fleeing of our own natural soulswithinthelandscapeofourbodies.Theschoolisaplacewherewecandiscoveror rediscover the cultural ingenuity that is in our bones, and resides, possiblydormant,inourthumbsandhands.

I have trained diligently in Shotokan Karate for thirteen years with theremarkableSenseiAaronOrtegaPiddington.Thispracticehashelpedgroundmeinthebody,providinganimportantcounterweighttogettingtoo“heady.”

Stephen Victor has been my guide through the world of “familyconstellations” and “organizational constellations” based on the teachings ofGerman therapist, Bert Hellinger. This work has helped me experience moredirectlythe“beingness”ofallthings,includingtheHebrewletters.

Allof thesepaths, in addition to theoriginal Jewish,Buddhist, andNativeAmericanviewpointsthatpoweredtheoriginaledition,informthisnewversionofOracleofKabbalahandgiveitwhatIfeelisadeeperandbroaderperspectivethanthatoftheoriginalbook.

Inaddition,IhavebeeninfluencedbycommentsandfeedbackfromusersoftheOracle.These responses, includingstoriesofhowOracleofKabbalahhaschangedandenrichedtheirlives,encouragedmetowritethisnewandexpandedinvestigation into the marvelous character and personalities and powersembodiedineachoftheancientHebrewletters.

Ifeelstronglythatthebeingofthisbookwantstobeintheworld.Thebookwants to be read and pondered and criticized and used by sincere spiritualseekersandexplorers.IfeelIoweittothebookitself,aswellastothepeople

whoreadit,tosetthisvolumeoutintotheworld,likelaunchingaboatontothecurrent,hopingforthebestasitdriftsouttowardthevastoceanwherethetidesofChancemoveunpredictablyyetinexorably.

Mayyoubeenlivenedandheartened,amusedandinspiredbyreadingANewOracleofKabbalah.Mayitcontributetoaricher,happier,moresoulfullifeforyou and for those with whom you share its teachings. I am honored by yourattentiontothisbook,andwishyouallblessings.

RichardSeidman,Ashland,Oregon,USAJuly2015

PREFACETOTHE2001EDITION

One Passover in the early 1990s, during a seder atmy friendAbby Layton’shouse, I first caught a glimpse of a Judaism that was fresh, vibrant, andspirituallysatisfying.

My Jewish education had been deadening. I attended Hebrew school justlongenoughtolearnthebareminimumneededforabarmitzvah.Thisinvolvedlearning how to sound out Hebrew words without knowing what the wordsmeant.Questions IhadaboutGodwere rebuffedor ignoredby the rabbis andteachers.Theyallseemedtiredfromtheirdayjobs.

I endured theyellingof themean-spiritedcantorwhowasmybarmitzvahteacher,andsoundedmywaythroughtheceremony,gratefulthatthelongordealwas almost over. Then Iwas free. I left Judaismbehind, feeling that itwas alifeless, arrogant, and hypocritical path. Later, I added “sexist” and“anthropocentric”tomylistofcriticisms.

Spiritual yearnings and aspirations soon arose, however. Shortly aftercollege,IbecameaseriousstudentofZenBuddhism,andthen,forseveralyears,of Christian Science, before returning to the practice of Zen. I beganparticipating in traditional Native American sweat lodges and other Indianceremonies. I studied the mythopoetic teachings of Joseph Campbell, RobertBly,MichaelMeade,andothers.Formorethantwentyyears,religiouspracticesofvariousforms,butnotJewishpractices,wereatthecenterofmylife.

Even though both my mother’s parents had grown up in Medzibozh,Ukraine, thehomeofthegreatmystic, theBaalShemTov,andthelocationofmanymagicalstoriesabouttheBaalShemandhisdisciples,IremainedignorantofanyformsofJudaismotherthanthesterileReformandConservativetemplesofmyyouthandthefundamentalistOrthodoxonesshownonthenews.

The seder atAbby’s housewas an eye-opener.Could Judaism actually bejoyful, ecstatic, profound, practical, earth-based, and non-sexist? A couple ofyears later, I read Rodger Kamenetz’s book,The Jew in the Lotus. Here wasmore evidence of a vital and dynamic Judaism, alongwith portraits of otherswhoblendedBuddhistandJewishways.

Around that time, a medicine man named Martín Prechtel performed adivination ceremony forme. He recommended that I learn someHebrew. Hesaid thatmyancestorshadbeen consumedby agreat fire and that part ofmydestinywastohelpbringtheirlostvoicesbacktolife.

ThroughAbby, ImetRabbiAryehHirschfield.Astudentof the influentialteachersRabbiShlomoCarlebachandRabbiZalmanSchachter-Shalomi,Aryehwasproofthatanenlightened,humane,humorous,anddeeplyspiritualJudaismispossible. I startedattending the JewishRenewal serviceshe led inPortland,Oregon.

Gradually, I began to see how the various spiritual paths I had followedresonated with one another. For me, it was no longer a question of JudaismversusBuddhism versus indigenous practices. Each had its own integrity, andeachspoke tome indifferentways.Judaismwas the religionofmyancestors,however, and it felt important to be reconnected with this deep part of myheritage.

In1997,IbecameintriguedbyfolkloreandmysticalteachingsregardingtheHebrew alphabet.As I learnedmore,many ofmy long-term interests found afocusintheAlephBeit.Foreachletterisanarchetypeandeachletterisakoanandeachletterisadreamandeachletterisapoem.

IbeganstudyingtheAlephBeitinearnest.AsIdidso,theletterscamealiveforme. Igainedanappreciationfor thesubtletyandprofundityof theHebrewlanguage.FamiliarwordssuchasshalomormayimtookondeepersignificanceasIbecamemoreintimatewiththeircomponentletters.Asdreamsorarchetypesorpoems,theletters,Irealized,couldserveasguidesorteachers,initiatingoneintodeeperlevelsofintuitionandspiritualunderstanding.IreadhowAbrahamAbulafiaandotherJewishmysticswouldmeditateuponthelettersandusetheminjustsuchafashion.

Thelettersretaintheirancient,archetypalpower,andyetIfoundmostofthecontemporarybooksontheAlephBeitwritteninEnglishatthetimetobearcaneandconfusingandverydry.

I also felt frustrated that almost all of the sources I studied approachedJewish spirituality from a narrowly Jewish point of view. It was as ifShakespeare,Yeats,Bashō,Kabir,Rumi,and the restof“non-Jewish”culture,not tomentionotherreligionsandindigenouspeoples,hadnothingworthwhiletosharewhenitcametoJewishmysticism.

IdecidedtowriteOracleofKabbalahwiththeintentionthatthetraditionalteachings regarding the letters would be presented in an enjoyable and clear,

practicalway, one thatwouldbe accessible to readers nomatter their level ofJewish knowledge or sophistication, or whether or not they consideredthemselvesJewish.Thisrevisededitionexpandsupontheearlierbook.

The perspectives gleaned during three and a half decades of meditation,study, prayer, and exploration inform this book. A New Oracle of Kabbalahborrows from other traditions to amplify or clarify its themes, but remainsgrounded in traditional andmystical Judaism.At the same time, I incorporatewritingsandteachingsfromavarietyofreligiousandculturalpathstoprovideperspectiveonthematerials.Theresult,Ihope,isonethatisdeeplyJewishbutnotnarrowlyso.

AsIbegantoconsult thisoracleforguidanceandinsight,andhelpfriendsdosoaswell,thelettersspoketouswithclarity.

For example,whenone friend,despitedoubts andconfusion,wasabout tomoveacrossthecountry,sheselectedBeit,thesignofhouseandblessing.Themessagewasclear:shecouldaspiretofindaninnersenseofhometogroundherevenasshe journeyed toandfro.Shecouldhallowtheplacewhereshe foundherselfinsteadofalwayslookingforsomeplacebetter.Also,shecouldmaintainanintentiontobeablessingtothosesheencounteredinthecourseofhertravels.

Awomanconfrontinga life-threatening illnesschoseGimmel.Thissignofthe camel reassured her that, like a camel, she possessed the resources sheneeded to make it through her frightening “desert” experience. Inspired byGimmel’scounsel toperformdeedsof loving-kindness, thiswoman, insteadofgettingstuckinasinkholeofself-pity,rededicatedherself toextendinglovetothosesheencountered.

Anotherfriendwasanxiousaboutenrollinginaweek-longdanceandtaichiworkshop.Wellintohisfiftiesandveryshy,hehadneverdonemuchdancing.Thisclasswasanattempttobreakthroughtoanew,freerwayofmoving,buthewas nervous.Was he too old, too stiff, too awkward? The letter he selected,Chet, encouraged him to have holy chutzpah, to confront his fear and movethroughthegateoftransitionintoanewlevelofexperience.

Inthethirteenthcentury,AbrahamAbulafiawroteoftheAlephBeit,“Everyletterrepresentsawholeworldtothemysticwhoabandonshimself[orherself]toitscontemplation.”1

Ihope that, likegenerationsofpeoplebeforeus, asyouabandonyourself,youfindexploringtheseworldstobehelpful,inspiring,andjoyful.

INTRODUCTION

TheLettersofCreationTheHebrewwordfor“letter,” —ot—alsomeans“sign”or“wonder”or“miracle.”Forthousandsofyears,JewishsageshavetaughtthatthelettersoftheHebrewalphabet,theAlephBeit,embodywonderfulandmiraculouspowers.

According to the earliest known book on Jewish mysticism, The SeferYetzirah (TheBookofCreation),writtenmore than fifteen centuries ago,Godformedtheentireuniversethroughspeakingaloudthetwenty-twoletters.Withthe vibration ofGod’s cosmic utterances, out of the nothingness of silence allthingsspringtolife.“Godsaid,‘Lettherebelight.’Andtherewaslight.”

The lettersof theAlephBeit, as themanifestationsofGod’svoice, are theenergetic and vibrational building blocks of creation. They are analogous tophysicalelements.Justas,forexample,anatomofoxygengasuniteswithtwoatomsofhydrogengastoformamoleculeofwater,sodoesonelettercombinewithanothertocreatenewbeings.

RabbiMarciaPragerwrites,“ThisperceptionofHebrewwordsandlettersastheconstituentspiritualelementsofexistenceunder-girdsmostJewishmysticalteaching.”1

Thelettersarearchetypes.Eachoneexpressesaspecificprimordialpowerorcreative energy. For example, ,Beit, is the sign of “house.” ,Mem, is theletterofwaterandthewomb.DavidAbramputsitthisway:“EachletteroftheAleph Beit is assumed by the Kabbalists to have its own personality, its ownprofound magic, its own way of organizing the whole of existence arounditself.”2

The thirteenth-century masterpiece of Jewish mysticism, The Zohar, TheBookof Splendor, says, “Forwhen theworldwas created, itwas the supernalletters that brought into being all theworks of the lowerworld, literally aftertheirpattern.Hence,whoeverhasaknowledgeofthemandisobservantofthemisbelovedbothonhighandbelow.”3

Unlike Indo-European languages, inHebrew, each letter also is a number.

The characters do double duty, serving simultaneously as numerals and assounds.

TheHebrew letters, therefore, represent not just the sound of creation butalsothemathematicsofcreation.Weareallnumeralsinthevastequationoftheuniverse that is at the same time the song, themusical score, of the universe.(Theword“score”suggeststhemathematicalbasisofmusic.)Alllifeiscreatedby the infinite combinationsofholynumbers that are also lettersof theAlephBeit.

For centuries, Jewishmystics and scholars have cultivated knowledge andobservance of theAleph Beit, and a vast folklore andmystical tradition aroseregarding the letters. In the thirteenth century, Abraham Abulafia developedpracticesformeditatingonthelettersthatmakeupGod’snumerousholynames.He taught how to permutate and combine these letters to elicit heightenedspiritualstates.

AbulafiaandotherKabbalistscreatedelaboratetheoriesregardingtheroleofeachletter, itsnumericalforce,anditsspecialplaceincreationandinformingthewordsoftheTorah.

TheybelievedinthepoweroftheHebrewletterstoaffectrealityinprofoundways.Forexample,somerabbisandstudentsinvokedspellsinattemptstocreategolems, human-like creatures made of clay. The word “spell” indicates themagicalpowersinherentinthecombiningofletters.Onewell-knownspell,theincantationalphrase“abracadabra,”maystemfromtheHebrewabrak’adabra,whichliterallymeans,“IwillcreateasIspeak.”

The power of the letters tomanifest as physical objects is reflected in thesharedrootoftheHebrewwordsfor“word”and“thing,” ,dibur,and ,davar.Wordsarethings,andthingsarewordsmademanifest.

In the Torah, the Ten Commandments are not referred to as“Commandments,” but rather Aseret ha’Dibrot, “the Ten Utterances” or “theTenSayings.”TheZohardescribeshowGod’sspeechcreatedthetabletsbearingthese Ten Utterances: “When these letters came forth, they were all refined,carvedprecisely,sparkling,flashing.AllofIsraelsawthelettersflyingthroughspaceineverydirection,engravingthemselvesonthetabletsofstone.”4

In the eighteenth century, themovement calledHasidism arose in EasternEurope.ItwasledbyIsraelbenEliezer,knownastheBaalShemTovorMasteroftheGoodName.TherehadexistedotherBaalShemsorMastersoftheNamebeforeIsraelbenEliezer.The titlealludes tomasteryof theability tocombineand permutate the letters ofGod’s holy name for the purposes of healing and

blessing. The Baal Shem Tov taught a joyful, accessible form of mysticism.Rejecting the legalistic approach of traditional rabbinical Judaism, the BaalShemTovandhis followersemphasized thepowerof simple,heartfeltprayer.ThisattitudeisreflectedinteachingstoriesregardingtheAlephBeit.

Inoneofthem,apoorJewishfarmerwasridinghishorseintotowntoprayatthesynagogueforYomKippur.Butaheavyfogsettledonthecountrysideandhecouldnotfindhisway.Asdarknessfell,hewaslostinaforestandwasgoingtospendYomKippurnighttherebyhimself.

This farmerdidn’thaveaprayerbook.Andhedidn’tknowtheprayersbyheart. Filledwith anguish, he cried out, “Oh,God,what can I do?Howcan Ipray to You?” Then he remembered the alphabet he had learned in hischildhood.Hesaid,“Iknow.IwillrecitethelettersoftheAlephBeitandYou,HolyOne,Youknowallthewords,YoucanputtheletterstogethertoformtherightprayersforYomKippur.”So,allthatnightherepeatedthelettersoverandover.

When theBaal ShemTov heard about this, he said that not onlywas thishumbleprayerpleasingto theHolyOne,but itspowerwassogreat thatmanypeople, even thosemore learned, had their prayers accepted thatYomKippurbecauseofthesincerityandpurityofthissimplefarmer’sAlephBeit.

TheattitudethateachletteroftheAlephBeitissacredisshowninthewayaTorah scroll is created.EveryTorah is handwritten.Not a single letter can bemissing,erasedorsmudged,normayanyletter touchanother.Ifso, thewholescrollisconsideredinvalid.

JiriLangerwritesinNineGatestotheHasidicMysteries,“Whenabookissobadly torn that it cannotbeused, thecaretaker takes it to thecemeteryandburiesit.EventhesmallestscrapofpaperwithHebrewcharactersprintedonitmustnotbe left lyingabouton thefloor,or troddenon; itmustbeburied.ForeveryHebrewletterisanameofGod.”5

Forcenturies,Jewishmystics,andsomeChristianones,too,haveturnedtothese“namesofGod” forguidanceand inspiration.Forcenturies,peoplehavemeditated upon the letters and reflected on their special powers. By trying tobecome more intimate with the building blocks of creation, these spiritualseekershoped tobecomemore intimatewith theCreator.TheBaalShemTovtaught,“Enterintoeveryletterwithallyourstrength.Goddwellsineachletterandasyouenterit,youbecomeonewithGod.”6

InspiringtheLanguage:BreathandtheAbsenceofVowelsinAncientHebrew

TheHebrewlettersrepresentconsonantsoundsonly.Thevowelsarefilledinbythe breath of the reader. InmodernHebrew, vowels are indicated by symbolsinsertedabove,below,orbesidetheconsonants.

Reading ancient Hebrew is thus a profoundly interactive experience. Thelanguagecomesfullyaliveonlywhenspokenaloud.DavidAbramwrites,“TheHebrewlettersandtextswerenotsufficientuntothemselves;inordertoberead,theyhadtobeaddedto,enspiritedbythereader’sbreath.”7

Not only does the reader inspire the text through his or her breath, theabsenceofwrittenvowelscompelsthereadertoactivelyengagewiththetexttodecide which vowels to choose to insert. Abram continues, “There was nosingle,definitivemeaning;theambiguityentailedbythelackofwrittenvowelsensured that diverse readings, diverse shades of meaning, were alwayspossible.”8

Despite — or because of — this ambiguity, ancient Hebrew retains apowerful eloquence. In the introduction to his translation ofGenesis, StephenMitchellwrites,“[AncientHebrew’s]dignitycomesfromitssupremesimplicity.Itisalanguageofconcisionandpowerfulearthiness,austereinitsvocabulary,straightforwardinitssyntax,sparewithitsadjectivesandadverbs—alanguagethatpulseswiththeenergyofelementalhumantruths.”9

DivinationinJudaism:AbominationorSourceofGuidance?

DivinationhasbeenviewedambivalentlythroughoutJewishhistory.Ontheonehand, there is the strong injunction inDeuteronomy: “Among you, there shallnotbefoundanyonewhopasseshissonordaughterthroughfire,whopracticesstick divination, who divines auspicious times, who divines by omens, whopracticeswitchcraft,whousesincantations,whoconsultsmediumsandoracles,or who attempts to communicate with the dead. Anyone involved in thesepractices isrepulsivetoGod,anditwasbecauseofrepulsivepracticessuchasthese thatGod yourLord is driving out [these nations] before you.Youmust[therefore]remaintotallyfaithfultoGodyourLord.”10

Ontheotherhand,Jewishpeoplehavecontinuouslypracticedvariousformsofdivination.InthedaysoftheTemple,thehighpriestconsultedtheUrimandThummim, the oracular “breastplate of judgment.”11 After the fall of theTemple,theUrimandThummimwerelost,butmanyotherdivinatorypracticesremainedpopularamongthecommonpeople.

RabbisfromTalmudictimesonwards,acknowledgingthisabiding,ancient,andwidespreadhumantendency,andtryingtoreconcileitwiththedecreefromDeuteronomy, developed a distinctionbetween “divination” and “signs.”Theyconsidereditimpropertotrytoforetellorinfluencethefuturethroughmagicalmeans, which they labeled “divination,” but acceptable to attempt to deepenone’sunderstandingoraskfordivineguidancefrom“signs.”Inmanycases,thisdistinction was more semantic than practical. The Encyclopaedia Judaicareports,“Thedistinctionbetweendivinationandsignsissometimessofineastobealmostimperceptible.”12

TheHebrewwordfor“letter”alsomeans“sign”and,forhundredsofyears,JewishmysticshaveconsultedthesignsoftheAlephBeitasameanstodeepeninsight.AbrahamAbulafia,forexample,wroteinthethirteenthcenturythat“theletters are without question the root of all wisdom and knowledge, and theythemselvesarethesubstanceofprophecy.Inapropheticvision,theyappearasiftheyweresolidbodies,actuallyspeakingtotheindividual.”13

ANewOracleofKabbalahandDivinationANewOracle ofKabbalah can serve as an oracle and ameans of divination.Onedefinitionof“oracle”is“anauthoritativeorwiseexpressionoranswer.”Itcomes from the Latin word meaning “to speak.” It is appropriate that theseletters“speak”tousastheyarethewrittenrepresentativesofhumanspeech,andin Jewish thought, they are also the agents by which God’s speech calls allthings into being. Listening to the oracle of these letters, therefore, can be anentrywayintohearingtheword,thesong,ofCreation.

Therearetwobasicdefinitionsoftheword“divination.”Thefirstis:“theartor practice that seeks to foresee or foretell future events or discover hiddenknowledge,usuallybymeansofauguryorby theaidofsupernaturalpowers.”The secondmeaning of divination is “unusual insight or intuitive perception.”This latter definition is the one intended with respect to A New Oracle ofKabbalah.

The letters, in other words, don’t foretell future events and don’t rely onsupernaturalpowers.Theywill,however,showconsiderations tokeep inmindasyouweighpossiblecoursesofaction.Allowtheletterstoactivateyourinsightand intuitiveperception,and theywill serveasakindofdivining rod, leadingyou tocurrentsof thoughtand life lyingbelowthesurfaceof things.“Lookattheseholyletterswithtruthandbelief,”AbrahamAbulafiawrotesevenhundredyears ago, “[it] will awaken the heart to thoughts of godly and propheticimages.”14

ANewOracleofKabbalahmakessomeofthepoweroftheHebrewlettersaccessibleandpracticaltocontemporarypeople.Thebookcanbeavaluableandenjoyable way for modern readers to enter into the profound world of theseletters. Knowledge of Hebrew is not necessary. The main requirements are acuriousmind,areceptiveheart,andaplayful,evenchildlike,spirit.

ANewOracleofKabbalahrepresentsmerelyanintroductionintothedepthsof the Hebrew alphabet. Many other books explore the subject much morecompletely.Pleaseseethebibliographyforsuggestionsformorein-depthstudy.

TheArtofConsultingANewOracleofKabbalahTo use the letters as a means of divination, buy or create your own deck ofHebrewlettercards.(Seepagexi.)Then,formulateyourquestion,chooseoneormore cards depending on the kind of “spread” you are using, and see thepotential paths and lessons to be learned that the letter reveals.Asmentionedabove, ot,thewordfor“letter”inHebrew(whichbeginswiththefirstletterof the Aleph Beit and ends with the last) also means “sign” or “symbol” or“miracle.”

TheBookofIsaiahsays,“Askfora letter[asign]of theHolyOne.Askiteitherinthedepthbeloworintheheightabove.”15Theintention,orkavanah,you have in asking is crucial. As you uplift or deepen your kavanah, theresponseofthecardswilltouchyouthatmuchmorehighlyordeeply.

IhavenoticedthatwhenoneconsultstheOracleinafrivolousway,withoutthinkingofaheartfeltquestionbeforehandandwithoutapproaching the lettersrespectfullyandprayerfully,theresultsseemlessrelevantorclear.

Thebasicway touse theOracle is tobecomequiet fora fewminutesandenterintoareceptive,meditativeattitude.Takethreeslow,deepbreathsfromthebelly.FormulateaquestionforwhichyouseektheguidanceoftheAlephBeit.

Avoid“yes”or“no”questions.Agoodgenericquestion is,“Whatperspectiveonthismattercanthelettersprovide?”16Prayforinspirationandreceptivity.

Onceyou’ve taken sufficient time to formulate anearnest inquiry,keepingyourquestioninmind,shufflethecardsandspreadthemfacedownonatableorinyourhand.

In helping people use theOracle for divination and self-discovery, I haveobserved that often there is a question beneath the original question. Theresponse of the letters can help uncover that deeper question. Sometimes theresponseoftheOracledoesn’tseemtoberelevanttotheinitialquestion.Whenthathappens,seeifthereisamorefundamentalquestionunderlyingtheoriginalone,andwhetherthelettersthatarechosenaddressthatmoreprofoundquestion.

SomegoodtimestoconsulttheAlephBeitinclude:

uponfirstwakingupinthemorning—tosetathemeforthecomingday.

after a period of prayer or meditation — to see what additionalinsightsemergefromaplaceofinnerquietandreceptivity.

atsunriseorsunset—tomarktheturningsoftheday.

atthetimeofRoshChodesh,thenewmoon—tosetathemeforthecomingmonth.

on Shabbos— to focus one’s prayers during this day of rest andrenewal.

at Havdalah, the ceremony marking the end of Shabbos and thebeginningofthenewweek—tosetathemeforthecomingweek.

before going to sleep— to welcome the archetypal power of theletterstoenterone’sdreams.

beforeembarkingona journey—tobeawareofopportunities forspiritualgrowthwhileoneisawayfromhome.

EarlyKabbalistpractitioners reported thatafterperiodsofmeditatingupon thealphabet, the letters came to life and began talking. Others said they saw theletters grow wings and fly from the surface of the page.17 Even if yourexperienceislessdramatic,perhapstheletterswillspeakquietlytoyou.

For those who know Hebrew, the cards can be combined to form words.

Newinsightsmaybegleanedregardingthesewordsasweseemoredeeplyintothe significance of the component letters. The traditional numerical values ofeachletterareindicatedforthosewithaninterestinGematria,thecalculationofthenumericalvalueofHebrewwordsandthesearchforconnectionswithotherwordsorphrasesofequalvalue.

Eachchapterbeginswithadescriptionofthebasicmeaningsassociatedwiththatchapter’sletter.Itthensuggestsvariouswaystheenergiesofthelettermightapplytoone’slifeorinformone’squestion.Shadow,orproblematic,aspectsofthe letter are then discussed. Personal comments of the author come next,followedbyachaptersummary.

Attheendofthesummaryisasuggestedaction,akindofmitzvahforthatparticular letter. Mitzvah is usually translated as “commandment” or “gooddeed.”Itsroot,though,is“connection.”Thesesuggestedactionsareexamplesofwaystoconnecttangiblyandpracticallywiththepowerofeachletter.Theyarecertainly not commandments, although in some cases theymight inspire gooddeeds.

TypesofReadingsand“Spreads”ONE-CARDREADING:SINGLELETTER,MANYPATHS

Thesimplestmethodistoselectonecard,anddiscoverwhatsignisrevealedtoyou.Lookupthedescriptionofthatletterinthetextandseehowtheideastherecorrespondwithorillumineyoursituationorquestion.Meditateupontheletter’sassociationsandalsotheemotionaltoneitevokeswithinyou.

AbrahamAbulafiaadvisedstudentstoconcentrateontheletters“inalltheiraspects, likeapersonwho is toldaparable,or a riddle,or adream,or asonewho ponders a book of wisdom in a subject so profound. . .”18 Ponder theanswertoyourquestionasyouwouldariddleoradream.

In your imagination, become the letter. You are not just someone who“chose,” for example, the letterDalet, whichmeans “door,” you are the dooritself,openingup.YouarenotjustahumanwhohappenedtopickGimmel,thesymbol of the camel, you are the camel,making yourway steadily through adesert.YouarenotjustapersonwhoisreadingaboutNun,theenergyof“fish,”you are the fish itself, swimming through the ever-changing waters of life.Experiencethecardsinthiswayandtheywillspeaktoyoumoreintimately.AsRabbiAbrahamJoshuaHeschelhaswritten,“Theultimatewayisnottohavea

symbolbuttobeasymbol,tostandforthedivine.”19Another way to use the cards is to select one and then meditate upon it,

carefullytracingitsshapeinyourmind’seyeandseeingwhatthoughts,images,feelings,or inspirationscome.Afterdoingthis,youmaychoosetorefer to thetext to see how the ideas there correspondwith your own discoveries, or youmaysimplybecontentwiththefruitsofyourownmeditation.

MULTI-CARDSPREADSInadditiontothesinglecardmethodofselectingjustonecardandponderingthelayersofinterpretationitoffers,youcanalsocreate“spreads”bychoosingmorethanonecardatatime.

Spreads have the potential to provide a fuller, more multidimensionalresponse toyour inquiry.Theyalsohave thepotential tobecomeconfusingoroverwhelming. I encourage you to experimentwith spreads only after you arewellfamiliarwiththebasicmeaningsandassociationsofeachletter.

Then,whenyouareinterpretingtheresultsofyourspread,youneednotreadtheentirechapterforeachletter,butcanmerelyreviewthechaptersummarytoget thebasicsenseof theOracle’sresponse,andhowthevarious lettersof thespreadsrelatetoeachotherandrespondtoyourquestion.

TWO-CARDSPREAD:SACREDMARRIAGEFor this spread, choose one card to represent “masculine,”Yang, direct-actionenergy.Placeitonyourright.

Choose a second card to represent “feminine,”Yin, indirect-action energy.Placethiscardonyourleft.

The letterof the righthand indicatesspecificactions thatcanbehelpful inaddressing the question you have brought to the spread. What “masculine”qualitieswouldbegoodforyoutointernalizeandbringintoplayinthecurrentsituation?Thisletterwillhelprevealthequalitiesthatlendthemselvestodirectaction.

The letter of the left hand indicates some specific ways that the subtle,receptivepowerof the feminine’sgreatabilitiesof indirect, spirallyactioncanshedlightonyourquestion.

Betweenthesetwocards,aforcefieldcanemerge.Thisisthe“thirdthing”ofthemarriageofthemasculineandthefeminine.Asyouexperiencethisinner

marriage of your male side and your female side as illustrated through thecombination of these two letters, perhaps you will receive an inspiration orperspectiveonyoursituationthatisnotwhollyrevealedbyjustonesideortheother.

Ittakesthesynergyofthetwosidestocreateawholethatisgreaterthanthesum of the parts. What is the new direction revealed to you through thismarriage?Whatnewpossibilitiesmightbebirthedintotheworldthroughtheircombination?

THREE-CARDSPREAD:PAST,PRESENT,FUTUREPrepareforselectingthecardsinthesameprayerfulandcontemplativewayyoudowhenselectingasinglecard.

Whenyouareready,chooseaninitiallettertorepresentelementsofthepastthatareinfluencingthecurrentsituation.Thesemaybehabitsorcircumstancesto let go of and release, or to bowdown to and thank, or to grieve for. In allcases,wearecalledtoaffirmthissignofthepastasbeingtherootofthepresentmoment.Thelettermayalsoindicateactionsthatcouldbehelpful inresolvingimpedimentsorunknottingentanglementsfromthepast.

Note which letter had been selected, and put that card back in the deck,shuffle the cards again, and choose a second letter to represent the presentsituation.Or,ifyouprefer,keepthefirstletteronthetableandchoosefromtheremainingletters.

The second letter drawngivesperspectiveon the forces at play right now,providingaspiritualsnapshotofthecurrentmoment.Itmayalsoprovidehintsforactionsandattitudes thatwillhelpmovethesituationforwardinapositivedirection.Itgivesyouyourmarchingorders.

Replacethatcardinthedeck,shufflethedeck,andchooseathirdletter,ordonot replace it and choose from the remaining letters.The third letter is theletterofthefuture.Itindicatesthedirectionthesituationisheading,thekindofactionsandattitudesthatwillbecalledforinthefuture.

If you choose to replace the cards after each selection and you wind upchoosing the same letter for two or even three of these temporal planes, itreinforcestheimportanceofthelessonsofthatletter.Payextracloseattention.Thiscouldindicateakindofstasisononehand,andtheneedtoshakethingsup,or,ontheotherhand,aunityofpast,present,andfuturethatcanbecelebrated.

FIVE-CARDSPREAD:ANGELSThereisasectionof the“BedtimeShema,” theprayersutteredbeforegoingtosleep,thatinvokestheprotectionoffourangelsandtheShechinah,thefeminine,in-dwellingaspectoftheDivine:

InthenameofHa-shem,theGodofIsrael,OnmyrightisMichael,onmyleftisGabrielBeforemeisUriel,behindmeRaphaelAbovemeandallaroundme,Shekinat-El.

For the Angels Spread, prepare to select the cards in the usual, deep,contemplativeandprayerfulway.Malach,theHebrewwordfor“angel,”means“messenger.”Whatmessagesdoeachoftheseangelshaveforus?

Youcanplacetheselectedcardsinfrontofyousimilartotheotherspreads,or, better yet, you can place the cards around your body according to thefollowingdirections.

Choose the first card to represent the message of Michael. The name“Michael”means“WhoislikeGod?”ormoreliterally,“WhoislikeForce?”Heistheangelofkindnessandexpansiveness.Placethiscardtowardyourright.

ThenextletterrepresentsthemessageofGabriel, theangelofstrengthandcreatingclearbordersandboundaries.Gabriel’snamemeans“StrengthofGod”or“StrongForce.”Placethiscardtoyourleft.

ThethirdletterrepresentsthemessageofUriel,theangeloflight,ofvision,inspiration, and of what is dawning. Uriel’s name means “Light of God” or“LightForce.”Placethiscarddirectlyinfrontofyou,forwardoftheothers.

The fourth letter represents themessage of Raphael, the angel of healing.Thisangel’snamemeans“HealingofGod”or“HealingForce.”Placethiscardinthecenterandbeneaththeothers.

Thefifthandfinal letterrepresentsthemessageofShechinah, thefemininepresence of theHoly, theway that heaven’s energy has comedown into yourbodyandismovinginyourbodyandyourliferightnow.Placethiscardrightinthemiddleofalltheothers,orholditoverheadorevendirectlyunderyou.

Oneway to interpret theAngelsSpread is toassume thateach letter is thevoiceofthatparticularangelortheShechinah.Itissendingyouamessage,andalso singing to you a song of protection. The energies of that letter arecommunicatingtoyouandwatchingoveryou.

The angels might also be showing you areas of your life to cultivate to

becomemore like them. Inotherwords, the letteryou select forMichaelmaypoint toward ways you can become even more kind and loving within thecontextofthequestionorsituationyouhavebroughttotheOracle.

TheletterforGabrielmightindicatethepathforyoutotaketodeepenyourexpressionsofstrengthanddiscernmentvis-à-visthissituation.

The letter for Uriel could hint at ways of bringing greater vision andenlightenmentintoyourlife.Thisangelleadstheway.Itrepresentsthesunriseintheeast,thedawningofanewday.

The letter forRaphael describes the context of healing, and suggestswaysforyoutobringhealingtothequestionormatteryouarecontemplating.

Finally,theletteroftheShechinahindicatesfundamentalcircumstancesthatareattheveryheartofyourlifeandthecurrentsituation.Youareinundatedintheenergiesofthisletter.Itisaboveyou,belowyou,insideyou,andallaroundyou.Thiscardisacall toopenyourheartandtakein thespiritandpower theletteroffers.Itwillbringtransformation.

HaveFunWhetheryouarechoosingseveralcardsforaspreador justasinglecardforabasic reading, I encourage you to have funwith these letters.Approach themrespectfully, butwith a spirit of play, and theywill be your friends.May theletters of theAlephBeit stimulate yourmind.May they provide guidance anddirectiontoyouractionsandspeech.Maytheyblazethroughyourheartlikethesoundofashofar.MaytheyhelpyoufeelclosertotheGreatMysteryandtoallbeings.

CHAPTERONE

Aleph

(ah’leph)

SOUND:silent1

NUMERICALVALUE:1;1,000;numberless

MeaningsAleph andaluph,Hebrewfor“leader”or“chieftain,” share thesameroot, .Aleph,thefirstletteroftheAlephBeit,isthechiefofallthelettersthatfollowit.

In the Hebrew numerical system, where each letter represents a number,Aleph equals the number one. It is also the first letter of theword for “one,”

,echad.AlephsymbolizesthecentralteachingofJudaism,thatGodisone.AlephisthefirstletterofthefirstwordoftheTenUtterances(a.k.a.theTen

Commandments), , anoki, “I.” All the 613 commandments of the Torahfollowtheleadofthischief.AllthecommandmentstracetheiressencetoAleph,thesymboloftheHolyOne.

Atthesametime,however,Alephsharesthesamerootaseleph,Hebrewforthenumberonethousand.Thisdenotesboththespecificnumeral1,000andalsoa vastly large, innumerable quantity. Aleph, embodying both unity andmultiplicity,isthustheprimefactorofcreation,leadingtheotherlettersastheycombinetoformthephenomenaoftheuniverse.

Computers are driven by an either/or, yes/no model of reality, and all of

modernlifeseemsmoreandmoreinfusedwiththissimplisticandreductionisticviewpoint.

Alephslipstheclutchesofthelimitationsof“computermind,”ofsimplisticdichotomies, of narrow labeling and pigeonholing, and black-and-whitethinking.

This letter of simultaneous oneness and numberlessness begins severalnamesofGodincludingElohim, ,andAdonai, .

Interestingly,thenameElohimisapluralwordthatliterallymeans“Forces.”Godisatthesametimeoneandmanyandbeyondallsuchdistinctions.

AnothernameforGodisEinSof,literally“WithoutEnd.”EinSofisrelatedtotheword ,ayin,whichbeginswithanAlephandmeans“nothing.”AryehKaplan explains that the term Ein Sof has the connotation of “the UltimateNothingness.”2 The essence of Aleph and of our lives is, paradoxically,nothingness.

Aleph’sessenceofnothingnessisreflectedinitssound.Ithasnone.TheveryfirstletteroftheAlephBeitissilent!Alephisthesoundthatcomesbeforesound.Alephissoclosetothedivineessence,ontheedgeoftheholynothingnessfromwhich sound and form emerge, that it can’t be constrainedwithin a particularsound.We“pronounce”Alephbyopeningourmouthsbutsayingnothing,asifwewerespeechlesswithaweandwonder.

Alephcoalescesintoformthatwhichisformless.Itmakessolidthatwhichcannotbegrasped.Atthesametime,Alephretainsthepre-alphabeticcondition,when“theearthwaswithoutform,andempty.”3

Outofthisemptiness,experienceflashesvividlyintobeing.Godsays,“Lettherebelight”andthereislight.Earth,air,water,andfirecomeintoform.ThreeofthesefourelementsbeginwithAleph: ,adamah,“earth”; ,avir,“air”;and ,esh,“fire.”

ApplicationWhen Aleph materializes in our hands, it is an opportunity to recall what isprimary.Aleph indicates a time to strip away the superfluous and get back tobasics, to essentials, to what is elemental in our existence. What are ourpriorities? Where, given the vastness of the universe, amid the swirlings ofnumerousintents,willwefocusourenergies?

Aleph is a transcendental letter that is at the same time at home in the

elements.WhenselectingAleph,wehaveabigchallenge:tobegroundedintheearth,air,andfireofdailylifewhilestayingawareof thecosmicemptinessofayin,nothingness.

“RabbiAaronofKarlinwasaskedwhathehadlearnedfromhisteacher,theGreatMaggid.‘Nothingatall,’hesaid.Andwhentheypressedhimtoexplainwhathemeantbythat,headded:‘Thenothing-at-alliswhatIlearned.Ilearnedthemeaningof nothingness. I learned that I amnothing at all, and that IAm,notwithstanding.’”4

The basic ambiguity of existence Rabbi Aaron is describing is expressedthroughAleph. Theword “ambiguity” has an originalmeaning of “driving intwo directions.” Aleph drives two ways: toward oneness and towardnumberlessness, toward nothingness and toward “I Amness.” The Buddhist“HeartofPerfectWisdomSutra”describesthissamedynamic:“Formisexactlyemptiness,emptinessexactlyform.”

Aleph challenges us to live, at least for a little while, without beingconstrainedwithinan“either/or”mindset.

RabbiYerachmielBenYisraelputitthisway:“GodmustbebothYeshandAyin, Being and Emptiness, simultaneously. Yesh and Ayin reside in and areexpressionsofGod’swholeness(shlemut).”5

How can we simultaneously embrace form and emptiness, something andnothing? How can we truly feel the oneness of creation within the infinitevariety of its forms? Reb Yerachmiel wrote, “The purpose of Judaism is notother than the purpose of any authentic religion: the unification of Yesh andAyin, Being and Emptiness, in the awakened consciousness of humankind.”6Howdowediscovertheunityofsuchapparentlyconflictingforces?

The shapeof the letterAleph provides someclues. Jewish sages teach thatAlephrepresents:(1)theyokeofanox,(2)theupperandlowerwatersseparatedbythesky,and(3)aladder.EachoftheseimagescangiveussomeguidanceinmakingpeacewiththeambiguityofAleph,theambiguityofourlives.

InadditiontoAleph’sshaperesemblingtheyokeofanox(especiallyinitsearlierhistoricPhoenicianform),thewordAlephisrelatedtoaHebrewwordfor“ox,”aluph.Anoxisananimaloftremendouspowerandfortitude.Whenthispower is tamed andharnessed, it helps people cultivate fields andprovide thefood of life. “A rich harvest comes through the strength of the ox.”7 The oxrepresents the spiritual power we have within us. The yoke symbolizes thediscipline that contains this incredible ox energy and directs it in positive,

nourishingways.ThecentralprayerofJudaismistheShema,“HearOIsrael,Y-H-V-Hisour

God,Y-H-V-H isOne.”8Toknow this unity beyondduality,weneed first tohave a kavanah or intention to do so. Then, we need the yoke of a spiritualpractice that will help us prepare the soil of our minds and souls to directlyexperience this oneness. This yoke may take the form of daily prayer,meditation,mindfulmovement,orstudy.Alephencouragesustotakeonatleastoneoftheseyokes,andtostartplowing.

ThegreatRabbi IsaacLuria taught that theshapeofAleph,embodying theambiguity of driving two ways, had another kind of significance. Aleph isformedbytheletterYudintheupperrightandaYudinthelowerleft,withtheletterVavlyingdiagonallybetweenthem.InGenesis,Godsays,“Thereshallbeaskyinthemiddleofthewater,anditshalldividebetweenwaterandwater.”9

AccordingtoRabbiLuria,theupperYudstandsforthehigherwaters,whichsymbolizethejoysoffeelingclosetoGod.ThelowerYudrepresentsthelowerwaters,whichsymbolizethebitternessandsorrowoffeelingfarfromGod.TheVavinthemiddlesimultaneouslyseparatesthesetwowatersandconnectsthem.

Aleph is thusaJewishversionoftheyin-yangsymbol, theChinesesymbolofcomplementarytendencies.Alephembracestheambiguityandthebalanceofform and emptiness, separateness and unity, oneness and “thousandness.”TheZohar describes this situation: “Crying is enwedged inmy heart on one side,whilejoyisenwedgedinmyheartontheotherside.”10

Alephteachesustoembracebothsidesoflife,thegriefandthejoy,thebitterandthesweet,inordertoexperiencetheintegrity,theundividedcompletenessofourlives.

The shape of Aleph represents a ladder, ascending up to the left. Jacobdreamedofaladder,setupontheearthandreachingallthewaytoheaven,uponwhichtheangelsofGodascendedanddescended.11Alephistheconnector,thebridge, that makes it possible for angels, bearers of divinemessages, to flowfreelybackandforthbetweentheheavenlyandtheearthly,theworldofinfiniteemptinessandtheworldofuniqueform,thenumberlessandtheone.

Aswe identify asAleph, we become the ox steadfastly plowing the field,preparing the ground for new growth. We become the sky and the waters,simultaneously divided and united. And we become the ladder making theconnectionbetweenheavenandearth,providingthechannelforangelstoascendanddescend,openingthewayforcommunicationwiththeHoly.

Then, we can say, as Jacob cried when he awoke from his dream of theladder,“GodtrulyisinthisplacebutIdidnotknowit…Howawe-inspiringthisplaceis!ItmustbeGod’stemple.Itisthegatetoheaven!”12

Aleph’sShadowAdangerofAlephistobecomeparalyzedwithambivalence.Whenweareableto see both sides,wemaybecome likeHamlet, unable to choose and act.Wemayneedtorouseourselvesintoaction,whilerecognizingthat“notchoosing”isitselfachoice.

BecauseAlephissoclosetotheEinSof,theUltimateNothingness,itcarriesthe danger of leading into nihilism, the belief that existence is senseless anduseless. If we have drifted to this extreme, we can recall the other directionAlephmoves, towardformandfulfillment.Alephdrivesbothways.Wecanbealerttothetendencytogetstuckinonesideortheotherofformandemptiness.

PersonalCommentsAlephishardtograsp.Howdowegetholdofaletterthathasnosound?It’sliketryingtocatchthewindinabutterflynet.Betternottotry,Ithink,andjustenjoythebreeze.

Alephcomesfromtwodirectionsandthen—wham!—herewearerightatthecrux.WhenIlookatAleph,Ithinkofallthemothersandgrandmothersandtheirmothersandgrandmothersallthewaybackthroughtime.Iheartheircriesastheygivebirth.Ithinkofallthefathersallthewayback.Ifeeltheiranxietiesand confusions. How precariously these ancestors engendered life and thennursed it alonguntilmysteriouslyandwonderfully thesechildrengrewupandhadbabiesof theirown.Forgenerationsupongenerations thishappened, longbefore hospitals and anesthesia.Amazing!And then it comes down tome, toyou.Allthesecouplings,allthesebirthpains,alltheworktheydid,allthefoodtheyate,thelustsandthelovesoftheseoldones,ledtomybirth,toyourbirth.Hereweare!

Aleph remindsmeofall this,of thebeginnings,of thematings,ofbirth,ofpromise.AlephbirthstheAlephBeit.ItbirthstheTenUtterances.Itstwosmalllinesconnectwiththebolddiagonalline,theconnection,thecruxinthemiddle.That’s where we are right now, smack in the middle. Aleph is basic,

fundamental,ancient.Alephislikearock;ithasseenitall.

SummaryforAleph

Numericalvalue: 1;1,000;numberless

Meanings: Chieftain.Onenessandmultiplicity.Ambiguity.Ox.Elementalforces.

Application: Focusourenergiesonwhatiselementalandbasic.

Live,atleastforalittlewhile,withoutbeingconstrainedwithinan“either/or”mindset.

Openourselvestoboththegriefandthejoyoflife.

Accepttheyokeofaspiritualpractice.

Shadow: Ambivalence.

Nihilism.

Reflection: Whataremypriorities?Where,giventhevastnessoftheuniverse,willIfocusmyenergies?

Suggestedaction: Closeyoureyes.Asyouopenthem,imagineyouhavejustbeenbornandareseeing,hearing,smelling,andfeelingthethingsofthisworld,includingyourownbody,fortheveryfirsttime.Experiencebeingreborntotheworldaroundyouandinyouwithheightenedappreciationforthenewnessofeachmoment.Practicethisafewtimestodayinvarioussituations.

CHAPTERTWO

BEIT

(bayt)

SOUND:borvNUMERICALVALUE:2

Meanings,Beit,means“houseof”andbayit, itscousinwith thesameHebrewroot,

means “house” or “home.”Beit is the first letter of the word , bracha,“blessing.”Beit,written large, is the very first letter of the Torah, ,bereishit—“Inthebeginning.”ThewholeTorahthusbeginswiththeenergyofblessingandtheshelterofahome.

For thenomadicearly Jews,houseswere tents, temporarydwellingplaces.Forhundredsofyears, Jewswandered, at home in their tents, praying in theirtabernacles,butatthesametimeyearningforahomeland,searchingforasettledhome. They also longed, as Isaiah put it, that “My house shall be a house ofprayerforallpeople,”1thatthishousewouldbeablessingnotjustforthem,butforall.

Application

Atsomepoint,allourancestors,Jewishornot,wandered,orweredrivenorfledor were forcibly taken far from their original homes. The entire world is indiaspora.Everyoneisinsomeformofexile.Everyoneissearchingforhome.

The letterBeit challenges us to sanctify ormake holy the placewherewepresently find ourselves, even as we roam and search and yearn for our truehome.

Dowefeelthewistfulness,thegrief,thedisplacedfeelingofthosewhoareexiledfromtheirhomeland?Dowefeelourselvessomehowtobe, likeMoses,“strangersinastrangeland”?Dowefeellost,farfromhome?

Ifso,Beitoffersusthehopethatwetoocanfindthefreedomofournomadicancestors, who set up their tents and yurts where they found themselves, andthenwereathomethereinthedesertorsteppes,amidthechanginglandscapesoftheirlives.

TheJapanesehaikupoetBashōwroteintheseventeenthcentury,

JourneyingthroughtheworldToandfro,toandfro

Cultivatingasmallfield.2

InthemidstofhispilgrimagesbackandforthacrosstheJapanesecountryside,Bashōfoundhisplaceofhome,hisfieldofcultivation, right therebeforehim.Wecanfindourstoo.

ShortlyaftermovingtosouthernOregonafterlivinginPortlandfortwenty-one years, I returned to Portland to visit my friend, the author and historian,Terence O’Donnell, one last time before he died. Terence asked how I likedlivinginAshland.Isaiditfeltstrangetome,andIfeltdisplacedandalittlelost.“Bloomwhereyou’replanted,”wasTerry’sgentleadvice.

ThisisgoodBeitwisdom.Onewaytobloomwherewe’replanted,tofeelmoreathomeintheworld,is

tofeelathomeinourbodies.Breathingfullyanddeeplyisakeywaytodothis.Breathingintoourbellies,wecomehometoourselves.Wecantakeacompletebreath right now.Wecanpracticedeep, yet gentle, bellybreathing everyday.Forexample,wecantakeafullbreatheachtimethephoneringsbeforewepickup the receiver. We can take some deep breaths when we’re waiting for thetrafficlight toturngreenorstandinginanelevator.Wecanfindregular,dailyopportunitiestoreallysettlethereintheBeitofourbellies.

Beitcallsustorecognizethebeauty,thewonder,theholinessofourphysical

selvesjustastheyare,nomattertheirsizeorweightorheight.Atthesametime,itcaninspireustotakethestepsnecessarytoprotectandnurtureandhealourbodies, for example by being mindful of the foods we invite in to the holyhouses,thesealchemicalcontainers,ofourbodies.

Beitcanalsobearemindertocareforthebodyoftheearth,thehouseoftheearth,thetempleoftheearth.Theletterisacuetobemindfulofouteraswellasinnerecologicalbalance.

Beitisopentotheleft,opentothefuture(sinceHebrewreadsfromrighttoleft).Thisremindsustoremainopentoreceiveguests,whethertheybetravelersornewideas.OurmodelsareAbrahamandSarah,whosetenthadnowallsandwhospontaneouslywelcomedthreestrangers,notrealizingtheywereangelsinhumanform.Beitencouragesustoopenourselvestothegive-and-takeofhumancommunityandspiritcommunity,andwelcomeangels, the“messengersof theMostHigh,”intoourconsciousness.

As we do this welcoming, the walls of our inner houses expand, and ourhomesbecomeBeitimMidrashim,sanctuariesofstudyandlearning.

Readingandstudyingandtalkingbringusonlysofar,however.Itispossibletomovebeyondtherealmofwordsandreason,beyondeventheideaofoneness,intodirect,vividexperienceofnow.Thesixteenth-centuryJapaneseZenmasterHakuinwrote, “With form that isno form,comingandgoingyounever leavehome.”3Ein Sof is a term for the ultimate nothingness ofGod. Touching therealmbeyondform,theEinSofoftheHolyOne,wearealwaysathome.

Letting go of our preconceived ideas, not being attached to our thoughts,noticingthegroundunderourfeetandtheopenskyaboveus,wecanbeathomewiththechangingcircumstancesofourlives.Then,ourhouses,nomatterhowflimsyorhumble,becomehousesofprayerforallpeople,blessingstoall.

Whenwe spend some time inBeit, we are called to ponder the nature ofblessing.What does itmean to bless?What does itmean to be blessed?GodpromisedAvram that hewould be a blessing.Howcanwebe blessings?Oneway is to count our blessings. Feeling blessed opens the way for us to findtangiblewaystoblessothers.

Atthesametime,asMartínPrechtelremindsus,untiltheunblessedbecometheblessers,therewillneverbepeaceorwholeness.

NaomiShihabNyewritesinherpoem,“Kindness,”“Beforeyouknowwhatkindnessreallyis/youmustlosethings,/feelthefuturedissolveinamoment/likesaltinaweakenedbroth.”4

Thosewhohavelosttheirlovedonesortheirhomesknowbesthowpreciousthesegiftsare.Ablessingfromoneoftheseholybeingsisapowerfulblessingindeed.

Beit challenges each of us to maintain an intention of blessing, and anawareness of having been blessed, as we journey to and fro through thelandscapesofourlives.

Beit’sShadowThereisdangerintakingtooliterallythedesireforone’shousetobeahouseofprayerforallpeople.Thebeliefthatone’sspiritualhomeisbetterthanallothers,thatone’smodeofreligiouspracticedeservestobecomepredominant,hasbeenthejustificationforwars,persecutions,andatrocitiesthroughouthistory.

Nowadays there is even violence to Jews against other Jews who havedifferentviewsofwhatitmeanstobeaJew.Thisisanexampleofthedangerthat inevitably accompanies such chauvinistic thinking. This kind of thinkingstems from the grief of having lost our homes. We impose our beliefs ontoothersinanattempttocreateaplacewherewemightfeelsettled.Beitremindsustobealert tothetendencywithinourselvesofanyfeelingsofself-righteoussuperiority.

PersonalCommentsIntheearly1900s,mygrandparentsfledpogromsandpersecutioninPolandandtheUkraine and sailed to theUnitedStates.Like somany Jewish immigrants,theysettled inNewYork.Theymadehomesthere,amidthe tallbuildingsandsubwaysandmillionsofpeople,marrying, raisingchildren, finding jobs.And,halfacenturylater,Iwasborn,anothernativeofNewYork.

But as I got older, I felt native to no place. Iwas increasingly lost in thisstrangeNewWorld of NewYork. You couldn’t see the stars at night— toomany lights. You couldn’t see the sunrise or the sunset — too many tallbuildings. You couldn’t follow streams — they had disappeared under theconcrete.Andme,wheredidIbelong?Wherewasmyplace?

Beit remindsmeof home. It carries the faint smell of somethingveryold,whichatone timewasveryfamiliar.Beitencouragesmethatyes,even in thisstrangecountryofmodern-dayUSA,Icanstillsniffalittlebitofthatpowerful

smell,theoriginalsmell,andonceagainbeathomeonthefaceoftheearth.

SummaryforBeit

Numericalvalue: 2

Meanings: House.Blessing.Container.

Application: Bloomwherewe’replanted.

Breatheintothebellytofindourhome.

Makeone’shomeaBeitMidrash,ahouseofstudy.

Countone’sblessingsandbeablessing.

Seekblessingsfromthe“unblessed.”

Shadow: Feelingspirituallysuperiortootherpeople.

Reflection: WhatarethreespecificwaysinwhichIcanbeablessingtoday?

Suggestedaction: Speakingaloud,blesssomeonetoday.

CHAPTERTHREE

GIMMEL

(gim’mul)

SOUND:gNUMERICALVALUE:3

MeaningsGimmelisthethirdletteroftheAlephBeit.ItsharesthesameHebrewroot, ,asthewordgamal,“camel.”Theshapeoftheletter,withitslongneck,suggestsa camel, and the English word derives from its ancient Semitic ancestor. Arelatedwordisgamol,“nourisheduntilcompletelyripeorweaned.”

The Talmud teaches that the foot of the letterGimmel is running towardDalet (the next letter in the Aleph Beit), which means “poor,” as a wealthypersonrunsafteraneedypersontodokindnesstohimorher.

Gimmelrepresentsthenumberthree.Itisaletterofstabilityandequilibrium,likeathree-leggedstool.Atthesametime,GimmelisthemysteriousthirdthingthatcomesintobeingaftertheoneofAlephandthetwoofBeit.

RobertBly’spoem,“TheThirdBody,”invokesthiselusivethirdentititythatarisesfromthemergingoftwo.Thepoemsaysamanandawoman:

obeyathirdbodytheyhaveincommon.

Theyhavemadeapromisetolovethatbody.Agemaycome,partingmaycome,deathwillcome.Amanandwomansitneareachother;astheybreathetheyfeedsomeonewedonotknow,

someoneweknowof,whomwehaveneverseen.1

The Hebrew word for “bridge,” , gesher, begins with the letterGimmel.WithGimmelweareabletocreateabridge,bringingtheunityofAlephandthedualityofBeitintoakindofinnerbalance.Thissynthesisormarriagepreparesthe way for action in the world in the form of g’milut chasadim, “deeds ofloving-kindness.”(RabbiJuliaMelanieVaughnspointsoutthatgemal,therootof g’milut chasadim, means requital, recompense, remuneration. It implies aresponsibilitytogivebackfortheloveandsustenanceyouhavereceived.)

TheTalmuddeclares that theworld stands on three foundations—Torah,prayer, anddeedsof loving-kindness.2Wecould say thatAleph represents thecentralteachingoftheTorahthatGodisone,Beitrepresentsthehouseofprayerandblessing,andGimmelthethirdfoundation,thatofgooddeeds.

ApplicationWhenweselectGimmel,wearebeingledtoinvestigateour“camelnature,”theability to nourish ourselves and others, and thereby perform deeds of loving-kindness.

Acamel is a remarkable animal. It can journey longdistances through thedesert,goingfordayswithoutdrinking,carryingwithinitselfaninternalsourceof nourishment and replenishment. (Camels do this by metabolizing the fatstoredintheirhumpsandconvertingitintowater.)

Gimmelencouragesusthateventhoughwemaybetravelingthroughahot,dry, intimidating desert, we already have within us the resources we need tosurvive.

Notonlydowehaveenough forourownneeds,wehaveenough to sharewithothersanddoactsofkindness.Gimmelaffirmsthatweare“wealthy.”Withthisabundance,thedesiretosharenaturallywellsupwithinus.

The late Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach tells a moving story about meeting ahunchbacked street cleaner in Israelwho as a child had been a student of thefamous“RebbeoftheWarsawGhetto,”KalonymusKalmanShapira.Thestreet

sweeper describes how Reb Kalonymus would always end his teachings bysaying,“Kinderlech,children,preciouschildren,remember,thegreatestthingintheworldistodosomebodyelseafavor.”

ThisteachinggavethestreetcleanerthestrengthtoresistsuicideandsurvivetheAuschwitzconcentrationcamp.“Doyouknowhowmanyfavorsyoucandoat night at Auschwitz?” he asks Shlomo. Then, this teaching helps him resistdespairandthetemptationtokillhimselfinTelAviv.“Doyouknowhowmanyfavorsyoucandoonthestreetsoftheworld?”hesays.3

This street cleaner, hunchbacked (like a camel) from being beaten atAuschwitz, found his own nourishment and ability to continue living throughperforming deeds of loving-kindness. Gimmel reminds us all, “Kinderlech,children, remember, the greatest thing in the world is to do somebody else afavor.” (And, remember, this “somebody else” doesn’t necessarily have to behuman.)

This sign of the camelmay indicate that one has recently gone, or is stillgoing,througha“desert”experienceofsomesort.Thesemaytaketheformoflackofmoney,health,friends,or inspiration.Gimmelencouragesustobelieveinourowninternalresources.Likethecamel,wehavewhatweneedwithinus.Eventhough, likeacamel,wemayproceedslowly,wemaymoveawkwardly,we may have difficulty getting started, nonetheless we are making steadyprogressthroughthedesert.Gimmelgivesusthereassurancethatwewillmakeitthrough.

Wehaveenough tomake it through,andwehaveenough toshare.Jewishteachingsenumerate specificgooddeedssuchasburying thedead,escortingabride to herwedding canopy, visiting the sick, comfortingmourners, plantingtrees. There are infinite additionalways to feed theworld, from small acts ofkindnesstogrand,nobleprojects.Maybeofferinga jokeat theright time,orasmile, or silent listening, or a kind touch, or food, or water is just the thingneededtonourishonewhoisthirstingforhopeorrenewal.

Muchofmodernsocietyseemstobelostinaculturaldesert.Gimmelshowsthat,justasthecameltravelsthroughthedesertwithitsnourishmentcontainedwithin, we have the gifts we need to thrive in this cultural desert. This lettersuggeststhatwecanfindwaystobringnourishmenttoourincreasinglybarrencollectiveculture.Ourart,music,poems,orstories,oranyworkofbeautycanfeed the soul hungry for culture, and can feedSpirit itself.Bringing this forthintotheworldasanofferingtotheDivineandtothepeoplecanbeoneofthegreatestactsofloving-kindnessonecanperform.

Gimmelalsocallsus tohonorthe“wealth”thatarises,paradoxically,whenwe let everything go— our attachment to ideas about God, comparisons ofpeople,conceptionsaboutourselves.

WhenweletourselvesrelaxinthiswayintotheemptyfullnessofEinSof,the “Without End-ness” of the Holy, even for a few moments, we find atremendous liberation of energy and a natural outpouring of compassion.Thisliberationnourishesus,andthiscompassionbecomesthenourishmentorcharitywecarryoutintotheworld.WhenwechooseGimmel,weareaskedtoreleaseourgrasponthereinsoftightlyheldconcepts,andletourcamelnaturenaturallywalkusalongtheancientpaths.

Gimmel’sShadowOne shadowofGimmel is described by the saying “The road to hell is pavedwithgoodintentions.”Runningaftersomeonetodohimorhergoodmayleadtosome very bad results. Some missionaries, convinced of the purity of theirmotivations, nonetheless brought disease and cultural destruction to the nativepeoplestheysoughttoconvert.

Tothinkofoneselfasarichpersonwhoisgoingtohelpapoorpersoncansetupadynamicofresentmentandangeronthepartofboththegiverandthereceiver, and one’s actions can backfire. Gimmel calls for skillful means ofperforming good deeds.Oneway to achieve this is to let go of the notion of“gooddeeds”entirely,andjustdowhatisbeforeustothebestofourability.

PersonalCommentsHave you ever ridden on a camel, listening to the melancholy sound of thewoodencamelbellsasyoubounceandswayalongthehotanddustytrack?Thissign of the camel,Gimmel, carries me when I get discouraged. It carries mewhen I’m lost. It carries me when I’m feeling so low that I forget I haveanything to offer anyone.Gimmel remindsme that the way to refreshment isaction.

SummaryforGimmel

Numericalvalue: 3

Meanings: Camel.Gooddeeds.

Application: Knowthatwehavethestrengthandenduranceweneed.

Performdeedsofloving-kindness.

FeedthecultureandtheDivinethroughourartandcreativity.

Shadow: Misguidedmissionaryzeal.

Reflection: Whataresomeopportunitiesforloving-kindnessthatariseinthecourseofanordinaryday?HowcanIactontheseopportunitiesmoreconsistently?

Suggestedaction: Performatangibleactofloving-kindnesstoday.

CHAPTERFOUR

DALET

(dah’let)

SOUND:dNUMERICALVALUE:4

MeaningsThefourthletterof theAlephBeit,DaletsharesthesameHebrewrootas ,delet,meaning“door,” “doorway,” “entrance,” “threshold.”The formofDaletsuggestsanopendoorwaywithitshorizontaltoporlintelandverticaldoorpost.

Dalet isalsosaid tosuggestapersondoubledoverwhilecarryingaheavyload. This is related to the other main association withDalet, that of a poorpersonwhoknocksondoors,beggingforalms.AsdiscussedinthechapteronGimmel,theTalmuddescribesDaletasapoorpersontowardwhomGimmelisrushinginordertogivecharity.

ApplicationWhenDaletwanders intoour life,weare asked to examine thenatureof truewealth.Dalet calls on us to open up our doors to receive the gifts that the

universeisrushingtobestowuponus.Ourabilitytorecognizeandreceivethesegiftsdependsonourhumility. It’snot easy to acknowledge thatweareneedyandtoallowourselvestoacceptofferingsfromothers.Whenwearenotfullofself-importance, when we are poor in ego and opinions, then the doorway isopenforinspirationanddivinegiftstoflowintoourlives.

Selecting Dalet is a reminder to cultivate humility. Have we becomearrogant, puffed up with our own importance, forgetting to acknowledge thecentralplaceof theDivine?Theword“humility”comesfromhumus,meaning“earth.” The English word “human” has a similar etymology, as does theHebrewword ,adam,whichindicatesboth“man”and“earth”(andisthenameofthefirstmanonearth).Aswebecomemorehumble,webecomemorehuman.

Humilityarisesfrombeingconnectedwithourroots,downclosetothesoil.Dalet,bentover toward theground,callsus to remember thisconnection, thatour bodies and nurturance, our very lives, depend on the earth. In fact, ourbodiesaretheearth.Wearetheearthmanifestingasliving,moving,self-awareand reflective creatures. We are not separate, and we are not self-sufficient.Rather,weareconnectedtoanddependentuponeverything.

Ifwearegoingthroughadifficulttimeandfeelinglowandpoor,Daletcanbe an encouragement that this very difficulty can be the door through whichgreater blessingswill enter.As Jesus said, “Blessed are the poor in spirit: fortheirsisthekingdomofheaven.”

Receivinggiftsandblessingsgracefullycanitselfbeagiftofferedtoothers.TheTalmudsaysthatmorethanababyseekstobenurseddoesamotherseektonurseherbaby.Sometimeswegive,sometimeswereceive.Sometimesthedoorswingsoneway,sometimestheother.Asweremainopentoeachsituation,notburdenedbyeither inflated ideasofourselvesononehandorexcessivelyself-condemnatoryonesontheother,wefindtheappropriateresponse.

Our senses are the doors of our bodies. As we open them more fully,blessingsnaturallyflow.Theseblessingsgraceuswiththerichesofthematerialworld,insuchformsasabird’scall,sunlightglintingongreenleaves,thesmellof onions, the taste of an apple. When our time is full of busyness and thearrogantpursuitof“moreimportant”matters,andourmindsarefullofideas,weshutthedooronthesesimpleblessings,thishumbledailylifewhichafterallisouronlylife.

Doorwaysmarkborders.Theydefine“in”and“out.”Modern-dayseerPaulRichards teaches thatenergygathersatborders.Thesecanbephysicalborders

such as where the ocean meets the land, or temporal borders, such as NewYear’soraweddingortheendofajob.HumbleyetpowerfulDaletisrightatthe center of these energy-rich boundaries. It’s the guardian of transitions, theopen doorway between one environment and another, betweenwhat has beenandwhatmightbe.

IntraditionalvillagesintheMayanhighlandsofGuatemala,thehouseshavedoorways but no doors. In fact, there is no word in theMayan language for“door.”Doorwaysallowforthefreeflowofsoundsandsightsandpeopleinandoutofthehouse,eachhouseholdconnectedtotherestofthevillageinanaturaland familiar age-oldpattern. In recent decades, after doorswere introduced tomanyofthesetraditionalvillages,peoplestartedguardingtheirbelongingsmoreand sharing less; informal socializing decreased, thievery increased. Sooneveryone startedputting lockson thedoorsandkeeping themshut.The socialfabricofthevillagesbecamefrayed.1

OneofDalet’smessagesforusistofindwaystostayopentoourvillages.Whileourdoorwaysdefineinsideandoutsideandprovideimportantprotection,closedandlockeddoorscanblockthehealthycirculationofpeopleandideas.

Daletasksustoopenthedoorstoourhearts.Thesufferingoftheworldandthepain inourown livescan leadus toshutdown, toclose thedooron thesedifficult emotions.Dalet encourages us to have the courage to confront thesefeelings,toopenuptothem.“Courage”comesfromcoeur,theFrenchwordforheart.Itiscourageoustofeelwithourheartsthedistressoftheworld.Muchofourlivesandmoderncultureisactuallybuiltondistractingusfromconfrontingthispain.

Simple,heartfeltprayerscarrytremendouspower.Oneteacherofoldwrote,“DonotthinkthatthewordsofprayerasyousaythemgouptoGod.Itisnotthewords themselves thatascend; it is rather theburningdesireofyourheart thatriseslikesmoketowardheaven.Ifyourprayerconsistsonlyofwordsandletters,anddoesnotcontainyourheart’sdesire—howcanitriseuptoGod?”2Daletgives us the reassurance that as we offer our prayers humbly and sincerely,wisdomandcreativitywillflowtowardus.

OneRoshHashanah, theBaalShemTov instructedhis discipleRebWolfKitzes in the properway to blow the shofar, the ram’s horn. TheBaal Shemtaughthimthespecifickavanotorprayerfulintentionsthestudentwouldneedtoconcentrateonwitheachblow.Butwhenthetimeintheservicefortheblowingarrived,poor,nervousRebWolfforgotallthekavanotandalltheprayers.Itwas

allhecoulddotomanagetoblowtheshofarinthepropersequence.Afterwards,hewasmiserable, heartbroken, andwith tears in his eyes he confessed to theBaal ShemTov his failure tomaintain the proper kavanah when blowing theshofar.

TheBaalShemTovcomfortedhimwiththisallegory:therearemanykeystothevariousdoorsofGod’shouse.Butthereisamasterkeythatopensallthedoors.Thismasterkeyisanaxe.Eachofthekavanotfortheshofarislikeoneofthekeys to the individual doors.Themaster key, the axe, theBaalShemTovtaught, is abrokenheart.With thismasterkey,onebreaksdownall thedoorsandstandsdirectlyinthepresenceoftheDivine.3

Paradoxically,asweopenourheartstothefullnessofgriefandsadness,weopenourselvestoreceivejoyaswell.TheHasidicmastersteachthatoneofthebestwaystodothisisthroughsinginganddancing.RebbeNachmanofBreslav,thegreat-grandsonoftheBaalShem,said,“ThemostdirectmeansforattachingourselvestoGodfromthismaterialworldisthroughmusicandsong.”Healsowrote,“Getintothehabitofsingingatune.Itwillgiveyounewlifeandfillyouwithjoy.”Andelsewherehesaid,“Getintothehabitofdancing.Itwilldisplacedepressionanddispelhardship.”4

Niggunim,thewordlessmelodiesoftheHasidim,havethequalityofopeningthe doors of our hearts to simultaneous feelings of joy and grief. We canincorporatethemessageofDaletbylearningandsingingregularlysomeofthesesimpleandbeautifulsongs.

OnewayDalet’spovertyorhumblenessmanifestsisinfreedomfromfeelingattachedtoaseparatedsenseofself.Asweletgoofthebarriersbetweenusand“others,”usandGod,aprofoundopenness results.Thedoorsare thrownwideopen. Walt Whitman exhorted us to “Unscrew the locks from thedoors!/Unscrewthedoorsthemselvesfromtheirjambs!”

Dalet represents thenumber four.Four isanumberofwholeness, fullness,andcompletion.Therearefourelements,fourcardinaldirections,fourseasons,fourWorlds in Kabbalistic cosmology, and four letters in God’s Holy Name,Yud/Hei/Vav/Hei. Paradoxically, the impoverished and needyDalet embodiesthisnumberofwholeness.Lettinggoofeverything,owningnothing,poorDaletreceives the blessings of the whole universe. In its very emptiness, Daletbecomesfull.

Dalet encourages us to not be afraid to be “poor in Spirit.” It promisesprofoundfullnessandcompletion,with the fourelements, fourdirections, four

seasons,andtheHolyNameallconspiringtopourforthnewblessingsthroughthedoorwaysofourlives.

Dalet’sShadowOne ofDalet’s shadows is that of false humility.Dowe nurse a desire to bepraisedforhownobleweareforoursacrificesormodestoutwardbehavior?Areweproudofhowhumbleweare?Selecting this lettercanbea reminder tobealerttothissubtletendency.

Another shadow of Dalet is excessive humility. Lack of self-esteem isepidemicinourculture,leadingtodepressionandself-destructivebehaviors.Inmanycases,alittlelesshumilityandalittlemorepridemaybeexactlywhatiscalledfor.

PersonalCommentsHelloDalet.One reason Jewshavemezzuzot on theirdoors is to remind themthat thresholds are sacred.Coming in and going out, that’swhat our lives aremadeof.Breathcomesinandgoesoutourlungs,bloodcomesinandgoesoutourhearts,ideascomeinandgooutourminds—inandout,inandout.

My grandfather had a plan for getting into heaven.Hewould stand at thegatesofheavenandopenthegateandclosethegate,openthegateandclosethegate,openthegateandclosethegate.Finally, theguardianofthegateswouldyellinexasperation,“Look,eitherinorout!”andmygrandfatherwouldgoin.

Dalet,ontheotherhand,isbothinandout,neitherinnorout.Itrepresentsthe freedom of the threshold. At the threshold all things are new. At thethresholdanythingispossible.Ourtreasureisrighthere,atthethreshold!

SummaryforDalet

Numericalvalue: 4

Meanings: Door.Doorway.Threshold.Humility.

Application: Openthedoorsofoursenses.

Stayopentoourvillage.

Openourheartstogriefandjoy.

Walkhumbly.

Shadow: Falsehumility.

Excessivehumility.

Reflection: Whatisthe“burningdesireofmyheartthatriseslikesmoketowardheaven”?HowcanIactmorefullyinaccordwiththisdesire?

Suggestedaction: Findawaytodaytoopenyourselfmoretoasituationorpersontowhichthedoorofyourheartisclosed.

CHAPTERFIVE

HEI

(hay)

SOUND:hNUMERICALVALUE:5

MeaningsThenameofthefifthletteroftheAlephBeit, ,Hei,means“lo”or“behold.”

HeiisthelettermostoftenlinkedwithGod’sname,asin ,Yah.Themostsacred configuration of the Holy Name, , Yud-Hei-Vav-Hei or YHVH,containstwoHei’s.

Hei is one of the mildest-sounding of the letters. Its sound is the merestbreathorexhalation.Asasuffix,Heidenotesthefeminineformofanoun.

ApplicationWhenHeiwhispersitswayintoourawareness,wecanbesurethatweareinaholystate,closetotheHolyName,neartothemotheringaspectoftheDivine.This closeness may take the outward form of broken hopes or relationships,however. Hei is one of only two letters in the Aleph Beit formed of twounattachedorbrokenparts.ButHeiofferstheassurancethat,justasaseedmust

breakopenwithinthemotherearthinordertosprout,wearebeingcrackedopeninordertobringnewlifeintobeing.

Heisays,“Loandbehold,hereitis!Rightherewithinyouandbeforeyouistheexpression,theverymanifestationoftheDivine.”

The Torah reports that God indicates faith in Avram and Sarai by addingHei, the initialofGod, to theirnames.Sarai, , thusbecomesSarah, ,and Avram, , becomes Avraham, . After this, despite theirextremeage,AvrahamisabletoimpregnateSarah,andSarahisabletoconceiveand bearYitzhak, Isaac, ushering in the long line of theHebrew people. Theletter Hei helps sanctify Avraham and Sarah, symbolizing their fitness tomanifest new life unexpectedly andmiraculously, affecting the destiny of thewholeworld.

Heicanalsotransformus.Isaac’snamemeans“laughter”and“delight.”Inmany languages all around theworld, words that indicate laughter commonlybegin with theHei sound, such as “ha” and “ho” and “hee.” As the soft butpowerful effects ofHei inform our lives, as it did for Avraham and Sarah, aperiod of barrenness can end, and happiness and the sounds of laughter anddelightresoundthroughourhousesonceagain.

In addition to meaning “lo” or “behold,”Hei, as a prefix, stands for thedefinite article “the.”TheTalmud says thatGodused the lettersYud andHei,whichcomprisetheholyname ,Yah,tocreatetheuniverse.TheYudwasusedtocreatethe“WorldtoCome”andtheHeiwasusedtocreate“ThisWorld.”IfHeihasmanifestedinourawareness,wearebeingaskedtopayattentiontowhatisbeforeus,tobeholdtheactualstuffofourlife,tobegroundedinThisWorld.

Heias“the”isadefinitearticle;itreferstoaspecificobjectorthing,notjustageneralityorabstraction.Havewebecomelostinabstractions,alienatedfromour bodies, our physical experience?Hei reminds us to pay attention to thespecific,definiteaspectsofourlives.

RebbeNachman once spotted one of his followers rushing by. “Have youlookedupattheskythismorning?”therebbeasked.“No,Rebbe,Ihaven’thadthetime.”“Believeme,infiftyyearseverythingyouseeheretodaywillbegone.Therewillbeanotherfair—withotherhorses,otherwagons,differentpeople.Iwon’tbeherethenandneitherwillyou.Sowhat’ssoimportantthatyoudon’thavetimetolookatthesky?”1

In a similar vein, the author SimoneWeil oncewrote, “Prayer consists ofattention.”2

Ourattention is amongourmostpreciouspossessions.Howandwhereweputourattentionisoneofthemostcrucialchoiceswemakemomenttomomentinourlives.Therearesomanyforcesvyingforourattention,oftenwithoutourbest interests inmind. PaulRichards has said that one of the travesties of the9/11attackswasthattheterroristsstolethecollectiveattentionoftheworldandriveteditontheiractsofdestruction.

Towhatwillwepayattention?Itispossibletoputwhatweloveinthecenterof our attention. To focus on our own and others’ greatness instead ofmediocrity.Oncreationinsteadofdestruction.Thiskindofwieldingofattentiondoesnotmeanbeingblindorignorantorlivinginastateofdenial.Itdoesmeanrespecting the profound treasure that our attention represents.When we havewhatwe love in the center of our attention, thenwe can look at the troublingaspectsoflifewithoutgettingconsumedbythoseaspectsandlostinthem.

Myfriendandguide,ErnieThayer,goesastepfurther.Heteachesthattheentireuniverseitselfiscomprisedof“warm,curiousattention.”Attentionisnotjustapersonalqualitythatwewieldwithvaryingdegreesofeffectiveness.It’snot our attention, per se. Attention is really the universe’s attention movingthroughus.ThisishintedatbythedoubleHei’sintheholyname,YudHeiVavHei.

Moseswasonepersonwhopaidattention.Onedaywhiletendinghisfather-in-law’sflocks,Mosesseesafirecomingoutofabush.Ashelooks,herealizesthebush isnotbeingconsumedby thefire.Mosessays,“Imustgoover thereandinvestigatethiswonderfulphenomenon.Whydoesn’tthebushburn?”

Moseswasintherightplaceattherighttimetobecomeawareofthisstrangesight.What’smore,hewasattentivetoit,abletonoticeitinthefirstplace,andthenwillingtointerrupthisplansandturnasidetoinvestigateit.Hewasn’tsocaught up in his own thoughts and preoccupations that he missed thisopportunitytobecomemoreintimatewiththeHoly.

TheTorahcontinues,“WhenGodsawthatMoseswasgoingtoinvestigate,God called to him from the middle of the bush: ‘Moses! Moses!’ “Mosesanswered,‘HereIam.’”

This“HereIam,”or ,hineni,exemplifiesthepowerofHei.God then says toMoses, “Take your shoes off your feet. The place upon

whichyouarestandingisholyground.”3This is themessageofHei:Holiness is righthere!Theplaceonwhichwe

stand,whereverwestand,isholyground.Thebushisstillburning.Thefireofimmediacy flames bright and hot.The question iswhether or notwewill pay

attention andnotice.Life is continuouslygivingus theopportunity to respondhineni! Lo and behold, right here, in this very body, this very place, is theDivine.

TheEnglishword“hey”isdirectlyrelatedtoitsHebrewcousin.Heicallsoutforattention,“Hey!Hereitis!It’snolongerhidden!”TheEnglishword“aha!”carries the energy ofHei.We can be alert for “aha!”-type experiences,wheresuddenly somethingclicks,where suddenlywe“get it.”One sign that thishashappenedisaninflowingoflaughteranddelight.

Ontheotherhand,revelationsmaycomequietlyandsubtly,whisperingtheirway into our awareness. The prophet Elijah, in desperate straits, fled to thewilderness and was led to stand upon Mount Horeb. At the mountain top,“Adonaipassedby.Therewasagreatandmightywind,splittingmountainsandshatteringrocksbythepowerofAdonai;butAdonaiwasnotinthewind.Afterthe wind— an earthquake; but Adonai was not in the earthquake. After theearthquake—fire;butAdonaiwasnot in the fire.Andafter the fire—asoftmurmuringsound.”Sometimesthisistranslatedas“astill,smallvoice.”4

Amidtheclamoroftheworld,theturmoilofourlives,thatvoiceofHei isquietlybreathing,murmuring itssoftbutpowerfulsound.Muchofour lives isconsumedbythewhirlwindofthoughtsandideas,theearthquakeofactions,thefireofemotions.HeiindicatesatimetoturnawayfromallthatandattendtothesmallsoundoftheDivine.

Aswesighdeeply,voicing the“haaaah”ofHeiandstillingourmindsandbodies,weprepareourselvestohearorfeelthesoftmurmuringsoundofdivineinspiration echo in our bellies. Doing this, we make ourselves ready to hearmessagesfromonhigh.

Thenwecancomedownfromthemountain,renewedandrefreshed,readytoengagetheworldonceagain,birthingnewbeautyanddelightintobeing.

Hei’sShadowOne danger ofHei, this broken letter, is getting stuck in brokenness. Brokenhearts, like broken bones, can cripple us. Our challenge is to let the brokenaspectsofourlivesinformourwholeness,addingnotdespairandhopelessnessbutdepthandmaturitytoournature.

Another shadow comes with “the soft murmuring sound.” Distinguishingdivineinspirationfromself-deceptionisnotalwayseasy.Temperingconfidence

in our revelationswith a little humility canhelpus avoid the common trapofimposingourvisionontoothersinadestructiveorarrogantfashion.

PersonalCommentsMuch of the time, I walk around in kind of a daze, my mind filled withdaydreams and plans and speculations and worries, not really noticing thevibrant life moving and speaking all around me. But every now and then,somehow, theenergyofHeipenetratesmymentalchatterandcallsout,“Hey!Wakeup!Payattention!”Andthen,almostdespitemyself,Inoticetheslantofthesunlight,thefeelofthebreeze,thedeepblastofthetrainwhistle,thesmellofthepopcorn.Heiawakensme,andforthosevividmoments,Iamabletosay,withconviction,“Hineni!HereIam!”

SummaryforHei

Numericalvalue: 5

Meanings: Lo!Behold!The.Hineni,“HereIam.”

Application: Payattention.

Listenforthestill,smallvoice.

Shadow: Becomingstuckinbrokenness.

Self-deception.

Reflection: Whatisthe“softmurmuringsound”oftheDivinesayingtometoday?

Suggestedaction: Atleastthreetimestoday,takethreedeepbreaths,lookup,lookdown,lookallaround,andsayoutloud,“Hineni!HereIam!”

CHAPTERSIX

VAV

(vahv)

SOUND:vorwNUMERICALVALUE:6

Meanings,thenameofVav,thesixthletteroftheAlephBeit,means“hook.”Asaprefix

toanoun,Vavmeans“and.”InBiblicalHebrew,when used as a prefix to a verb,Vav serves a special

function;itchangesthetenseoftheverbfrompasttofutureorviceversa.Inthisrole,Vavinvertstime,connectingandtransmutingpastandfuture.

Vav equals thenumber six, thenumberof days inwhich theuniversewascreated.

ApplicationVav isan incrediblypowerful letterofconnection,ofcontinuity,ofunificationthroughbothtimeandspace.WhenVavconnectswithus,itisanopportunitytodeepenoursenseofunityandconnectionwithallthings.

Oneof thediseasesofour time is feelingdisconnected.Manyofus lackadeepintimacywiththephysicalplacewherewelive,theanimals,plants,rivers,hills, rocks, and insects of our specific bioregions. We’re often disconnectedfromneighbors, familymembers, friends.We’re sometimesdisconnected fromour own bodies and our own emotions. We may feel disconnected from therealmofourancestors.Often,wefeeldisconnectedfromGod.

In fact, we spendmuch of our lives trying somehow to connect, to breakdown the walls of apparent separation. Vav, as one of the twenty-two letterenergieswithwhichtheHolycreatedtheuniverse,offerstheencouragementthatthepowerofconnectionisbuiltdeeplyintotheverystructureofcreation.

Vav’senergyofconnectionisembeddedinthemostsacredconfigurationofGod’sname, ,Yud-Hei-Vav-Hei.Vavshowsusthat,infact,wemaynotbeasseparateaswefeel.Infact,wemaynotbeseparateatall.Thisdoesnotmeanlosingour individualityoruniquenessassentientbeings. It justmeans thatwearenotisolatedandalone.

HowdowefosteraVav-likesenseofconnectionatthephysicallevel?Onewayistobecomeconsciousofthepullofgravityofourbodycentertothecenterof the earth. We are connected, center-to-center, belly-to-belly, with thisspinningplanetonwhichwelive.Wecantakeafewmomentstobendourkneesslightly,plantourfeetfirmlyontheground,andmoveourbodycenterclosertotheearth’scenter.Then,wecanfeelthepoweroftheearthenteringupthroughourfeetandlegsallthewaytoourbellyevenasgravityhugsusdown.

Ourfeetdwelldownthereatthemysteriousedge,theborderbetweenusandtheplanet.Theywalkusthroughourlives,alongthesurfaceoftheworld,whileour body’s core forms theVav of connectionwith the core of theworld, thusconnectingustoeveryoneandeverythingelseonthisglobe.

Evenwhenwe’renotawareofsuchaconnection,weareindeedconnected.Infact,itispossibletobreakdownasenseofdualitybetweenusandtheplanet,andexperienceourwalkingas theearth itselfwalking,ourbreathing,orbeingbreathed,astheplanetbreathing.

The act of eating is a profound act of uniting.Theplants and animals andliquidswetakeintoourbodiesmysteriouslybecome“us.”AtthePassovertableweunitewithourancestorswhenwetastethebitterherbsofafflictionandthedrynessoftheunleavenedmatzahofthedesert.

ItwasataPassoversederthatJesusandhisdisciplesatethe“LastSupper.”Jesus’ sharing of the matzah and the wine became the prototype for thesacramentofcommunion.Actually,everytimeweeatordrinkorevenbreathe,

wearepartaking in communion, coming intounionwith the sun, the rain, thesoil, thelifeforceofplantoranimal, theancestorsofthatplantoranimal,andalsowiththeenergiesofthehumanswhoraisedthefood,transportedit,soldit,cookedit.

In acknowledgment of all this, observant Jewswash their hands and say ablessingeachtimebeforeeating,andsayprayersofthanksafterwards.Everyactofeatingordrinkingisamiracle:amiracleofconnection.Appreciatingourfoodinthisway,wefeedourVavawarenessatthesametimewenourishourbodies.

Throughitsenergyofconnectionandunification,Vavhelpshealaruptureduniverse. Led by the sixteenth-century rabbi, Isaac Luria, the Kabbalistsdeveloped an idea known as “the shattering of the vessels.” In the beginning,Godemanateddivine light. Inorder for this light tobeaccessible to the finiteworld,itwaspouredintovesselscorrespondingtothetenSefirot,orbranches,oftheTreeofLife.Thevesselsofthethreehighestbrancheswereabletocontainthelight,butwhenitenteredthelowerbranches,thegreatpowerofthedivinelightwastoomuchforthevesselsandtheybrokeandthelightwasscattered.

Sincethattime,afundamentalresponsibilityofhumansistoworkattikkun,repair of the vessels and the unification of the scattered and exiled shards oflight. The appearance of the Messiah will mark the consummation of thisongoingprocessofrestoration.

Whenthelastvesselshattered,theShechinah,thefeminine,immanentaspectoftheDivine,wasdrivenintoexile.TikkunseekstoreunitetheShechinah, theDivineBride,withthemasculine,transcendentaspectoftheDivine.ThescholarGershom Scholem writes that “in one way or other the true purpose of theTorah” is to lead theShechinah back to unionwithGod.1RabbiLuria taughtthat the fulfillmentof eachof the613commandments shouldbe accompaniedwiththedeclarationthattheactwasdoneforthesakeofunitingtheHolyOneandtheShechinah.

TheshatteringofthevesselsandtheexileoftheShechinahparallelthefallfromtheGardenofEden.Withtheshatteringofthevessels,God’sverynatureissplit.ThemaleandfemalepartsoftheDivine,thetranscendentandimmanent,are exiled from each other. No wonder we humans feel a void or separationwithinourselves.Nowonderthereissuchagulfandsuchtensionbetweenmenandwomen.

Vav forwards the process of tikkun. It embraces opposites. As the sayinggoes,“Theseandthesearetrue.”

Ironically,oneoftheseseemingoppositesisthatwhiletheworldisbroken,

atthesametimethereisnothingtorepair!Itjustiswhatitis.Maybetikkunisrealizing,not just intellectuallybutvividlyandviscerally, thatall isokay, thatit’sallgoingtobeallright.

Vavgatherstogetherthescatteredsparksofdivinelightfromthesixcornersof theuniverseandfrompastandfuture.ByselectingVav,one iscalled tobepartofthegreatunifyingprocessoftikkun.Eachpersonhasakeyroletoplayinbringing together the sparks of divinity, of uniting the Bride and the Groom,healing the riftbetweenwomanandman.Vav inspiresus tobecomeagentsofconnection, of re-union to help usher in the messianic age in which exile isended, the vessels of divine light are repaired, and wholeness and harmonyreign.

Vav encouragesus to findour special place in theprocessof restoring thelightofcreation.Howwillwehelpforwardtikkun?Thisisourchallengeandourdestiny. Some people attempt tikkun olam, “repair of the world,” in a verypracticalway through political participation, environmental action, communityinvolvement. Others approach the challenge of tikkun more mystically. Vavconveys thegeneralqualityof theprocess,namelyconnectionandunification.Through our prayers and actions performed with kavanah, intention, wecontribute,eachinouruniqueway,tothiscosmicrepairjob.

Vav’sShadowGetting“hooked”isoneofthenegativesidesofVav.Addictionsofallsortsareakindofover-connectedness.Areweaddictedtonovelty,topraise,towork,tostimulation,toourownpersonalmelodramas?

Are we over-identified with another person? It’s wonderful to have aprofoundconnectionwithsomeone,buthoweasilythatconnectioncanslipintoanunhealthycodependence.Thereisatimeforconsensusandthereisatimetotakestrong,unilateralaction.Vavservesasaremindertonurtureandwelcomeour connections to others, while not neglecting to nurture our own uniqueindividualityaswell.

PersonalCommentsSometimes Iwander about the city streets, and people seem so different fromme.Ifeelcutofffromthem,cutofffromtheland,cutofffrommyancestors,cut

offfrommyself.Inmomentsofgrace,though,Vavcomestomyaid.Vavremindsmethatat

therootsweareconnected,attherootsweareactuallypartofthesametree.Vavisuprightlikeatree.Treesconnectheavenandearth.Vavconnectsyouandme.The fruits of this tree are beauty and life.Vav prods me to look beneath thesurfaceappearanceandseethewebofconnectionallaroundme.Byconnectingmetoallthings,Vavconnectsmetomyself.

SummaryforVav

Numericalvalue: 6

Meanings: Hook.And.Connection.

Application: Connecttotheearththroughthefeet.

Feedourconnectionaswefeedourbodies.

Discoverone’spathoftikkun,repair.

Shadow: Gettinghooked.

Codependence.

Reflection: WhataresomewaysIcanforwardtheprocessofconnection,ofre-union,oftikkun?

Suggestedaction: Forafewminutestoday,sitquietlyandwatchyourbreath.Asyoudoso,imagineyourselfnotsomuchbreathingasbeingbreathed.Thisistheever-presentactivityofRuachHa-olam,SpiritoftheWorld(oneofthenamesofGod).

CHAPTERSEVEN

ZAYIN

(zi’yin)

SOUND:zNUMERICALVALUE:7

MeaningsZayinisaletterofassertivenessandpower.Itsformresemblesaswordanditsnameisrelatedto ,theHebrewrootfor“arms”or“weapons.”

Zayin equals seven. Seven represents one form of completeness. Wecommonlydescribe sixphysical directions—east,west, north, south, up, anddown—plusaseventh,aninwarddirection,aninnerfocalpoint.Godrestedontheseventhday,havingcompletedtheoutwardworkofcreatingtheuniverse.Asthe seventh letter of the Aleph Beit, Zayin symbolizes Shabbat, Sabbath, theperiodwesetasidetorestandrememberandcelebratethatoriginaldayofrestandcelebrationwhenallthingswerenew.

Zayinisthusaparadox.ThissignofaweaponofwarisalsoasymbolofthepeaceoftheShabbat.ThechallengewithZayinistointegratethetwo.Canwebe“peacefulwarriors”?Canwewieldourswordsappropriately,defendingandinspiring life and beauty instead of causing more death, destruction, and

alienation?AswitheachofthelettersoftheAlephBeit,thedeepermeaningoftheletteritselfgivesguidanceonhowtomeetthechallenge.

Application,zachor,“remember,”beginswithaZayin.“RemembertheSabbathday,to

keepitholy,”wasoneoftheTenCommandments,moreaccuratelytranslatedas“TenUtterances,” thatMosesbroughtdownfromthemountain.1AswehonortheSabbath,intheformthatfeelsappropriate,were-memberit,inthesenseofpiecing it back together again.OnShabbat,we re-create our selves aswe re-memberoriginalcreation.

Oneway todo this is to stepoutof theworldofhustle andbustle, out ofcommerceandworkadaytime,outofmodernityitself,andenterthesanctuaryofsacred time.DuringShabbat,we rest andwelcome intoour lives the feminineaspectoftheDivine,theShechinah,theSabbathQueen.

Shabbat is healing for the body and the nervous system, especially in our24/7modernworld.It’sadaytotakeabreakfrommanuallaborandalsofromtechnology. The break allows the para-sympathetic nervous system to comeforward with what is called “the relaxation response.” The vast majority ofhealing happens during sleep, meditation, and rest, when the holy body canbecomewholeonceagain.

ChoosingZayincanindicateatimetolaylow,tostaynearhomewithfamilyand friends, to bewith nature, towithdraw fromworldly commerce, to study,pray, and sing. The Talmud says, “What was created on the seventh day?Tranquility,serenity,peace,andrepose.”2ZayinrepresentsatimetoturntotheinnerSabbath,totheseventh,innerdirection,andnourishpeace.

It’salsoatimeforenjoyment!AbrahamJoshuaHeschel,inhisclassicbook,The Sabbath, teaches, “Unlike the Day of Atonement, the Sabbath is notdedicated exclusively to spiritual goals.” It’s a day of the body and the soul.“ComfortandpleasureareanintegralpartoftheSabbathobservance.”3

The Talmud says, “Sanctify the Sabbath by choice meals, by beautifulgarments; delight your soulwith pleasure and Iwill reward you for this verypleasure.”4

Wehaveseen thatZayincallsus to remember.Traditionally, thepeopleoftheIroquoisLeagueremembernotonlytheancestors,butthosetocome.When

making any important decision, they consider the children to be born sevengenerationslater.Howwillthisdecisionaffectthem?

Zayin remindsus to stepback from theday-to-day, and take a look at ourlives fromthis longview.Doweneed toadjustanything inour lives today tobetterservetheseventhgeneration,whichforusnowarethechildrenofthelatetwenty-secondcentury?Doweactasiftheymatterandthatweareresponsibletothem?

Our ancestors seven generations back lived in the mid 1800s. Did theyremember us, their descendants, who are now living in the first part of thetwenty-firstcentury?

Shmitah,thesabbaticalyear,comeseveryseventhyear.Shmitahisaperiodoflettingthefieldsliefallowandgivingtheeartharest.WhenZayinappearsinour hands, it may signify a time to take some form of a sabbatical, to giveourselves a break, at least for a little while, and renew our perspectives, andsavoralittlefreedom.

Freedom,however,oftenhas tobefoughtforandwon,andthendefended.Here is where Zayin as weapon dovetails with the letter’s peaceful, Shabbatqualities. To protect our sacred Shabbat time, we must wield the sword thatguardsboundaries.Wemustdefendtheprecioussoulspace,protectthefeminineaspectsofourselves.

Theseaspectsmaybeendangeredby thedemandsofotherpeopleandourfast-paced materialistic culture, with its patriarchal remnants. We areconditioned to conform to industrial time, not natural time. “Modern time” is24/7, go! go! go! time. How easily we forget to remember the Sabbath, bothliterallyandfiguratively.

Zayin isacall for incisiveness, for that sharpclarityofmindand intentionthatsafeguardsthatwhichisprecious.RobertBlysaysinIronJohn,“Showingasword doesn’t necessarily mean fighting. It can also suggest a joyousdecisiveness.”5

WhenAdamandEvewerecastoutoftheGardenofEden,aflamingswordwasplacedattheentrancethatturnedineverydirectionandprotectedtheTreeofLife.Weareeachcarriersoftheflamingswordthatguardstheinnertreeoflife.Throughdecisiveness inhonoringwhat is truly important tousbycuttingoffwhatisnot,weskillfullywieldtheswordofZayin.

WilliamBlakeinvokestheinspirationofZayininhisprefacetoMilton,

IwillnotceasefromMentalFight,

NorshallmySwordsleepinmyhand,TillwehavebuiltJerusalemInEngland’sgreenandpleasantLand.

Choosing the letterZayin is a call to arms. It’s a challenge to keep alert andvigilant, and not be lured to sleep by the siren song of commerce andmaterialism, perfectionism and obsessiveness. We continually have theopportunity tobuildJerusalem,Yerushalayim,“theVisionofShalom,” thecityofpeace,righthere,inthismoment,inthisbody,rightwhereweare.

Zayin’sShadowTheSabbathcomesaroundonlyonceeverysevendays.Partofitsbeautyisinthe contrastwith the rest of theweek. Toomuch rest and pleasure, toomanychoice meals, and our lives quickly get out of balance. Laziness and over-indulgencearepitfallstobeawareofwhenselectingZayin.

Another is over-aggressiveness. It’s important to wield the sword thatdefendsboundariesandprotectswhatneedstobeprotected,butnottobecomeviolentorparanoid.Zayinevokesthatpartofhumannaturethatisspoilingforafight, that longs for blood, that justifies aggression in the nameof all sorts ofideologiesandrationalizations.WhenwechooseZayin,weareremindedthatthedark tendency toward war and violence resides within each of us. Byacknowledgingthepresenceofthesedestructivetendenciesinourownnatures,wecanavoidactingthemoutorprojectingthemontosome“other.”

PersonalCommentsDidyoueverpickupa real sword? It’sheavy!Yet, there is away towield aswordwithoutexhaustingoneself,an“effortlesseffort,”orwu-weiastheysayinChinese.

Zayinteachesthatexhaustionisactuallymorelikelytocomeifwerefusetopick up that swordwhich protects our treasure, our sacred time.When I wasexecutivedirectorofFriendsofTrees,anonprofittree-plantingorganization,wefoundourselvestakingonprojectafterprojectuntilthestaffandvolunteerswereoverstretchedandstressedout.

Finally, I posted two signs in the office. One said, “It’s the tree-planting,

Stupid,”toremindustostayfocusedontheorganization’scoremissionandhelpus resist the temptation to stray into extraneouspursuits.Theother said, “Justsaynotomoreprojects,”todiscourageusfrompilingupmoreandmoreworkforourselves.Clarifyingessentialpriorities,un-choosingactionsthatdon’talignwith thosepriorities, and thenbeingwilling todefendour choices andprotectourpriorities,that’sZayinwork.

There’sacertainkindof sword Ibecameproficientatusing. It’s light,buteffective.Youcanuseittoo,ifyouwant.It’stheword“no.”

SummaryforZayin

Numericalvalue: 7

Meanings: Weapon.Sword.

Application: RemembertheSabbath,remembertorest.

Wieldtheswordthatprotectswhatisprecious.

Shadow: Indolence.

Warandinappropriateaggression.

Reflection: Inordertohonorwhatistrulyimportanttome,isthereanythingthatIneedtocutout?

Suggestedaction: Thisweekend,celebratetheSabbathinwaysthataresatisfyingandmeaningfultoyou,keepingworkadaytasksandpressurestoaminimum.

CHAPTEREIGHT

CHET

(cheht)

SOUND:chasinchutzpahNUMERICALVALUE:8;INFINITY

MeaningsChetistheeighthletteroftheAlephBeit.Assevenisanumberofcompletion,eightsignifiesatimeofnewbeginnings, theenteringofanewcycle.Withtheeighth day, a new week begins. With the eighth note, a new, higher octavesounds.TheHebrewwordfor“new,” ,chadash,beginswithChet.

Besidesstandingfor thenumbereight,Chetalsorepresents infinity(whosesymbolisasidewayseight),thenumberlessrealmbeyondspaceandtime.

The form ofChet resembles an arch or gateway.New life emerges asweleave the old behind, cross the threshold and step into the unknown, into theinfinite.

Such crossings, however, can be full of fear.Chet is key to the Hebrewwordsforboth“life,” ,chayim,and“fear,” ,chitah.Tobealiveistobeafraid.Chetteachesushowtonegotiateendingsandbeginningsinourlivesinthisfrighteningworldwith ,chesed,graceandloving-kindness.

ApplicationChet,thispowerfulsymboloftransformation,isthefirstletterof ,chupah,theweddingcanopy.TheformofChetactuallylookslikeachupah.Thechupahisbothashelterandagatewayintothejourneyofmarriedlife.Asthebetrothedpairstandbeneaththechupah,theyareinliminalspace,aholy,highly-charged,in-between realm.When they emerge from the chupah, their lives have beenprofoundlychanged.Theyarebornintotheworldasamarriedcouple.

Chet evokes these questions: From what metaphorical chupah are youemerging? What or whom are you choosing to marry, to unite with? Whatradicaltransformationsareyouundergoing?

Ataweddingceremony,thewineofblessingisdrunkandeveryonecheers,“L’chayim!” “To life!” Chet encourages us to stride through the gateway oftransformationwithavibrantspirit,toenjoythespontaneousalivenessofbeingahumanbeing,toembracelifecomewhatmay,goodfortuneorno.

Comewhatmay.Gevalt!Lifeisafearsomeproposition.Oneeatsandtriestoavoidbeingeaten.Mostofusthesedaysarenotindangerofbeingdevouredbywild animals, but there are other forces out there that would consume us:microbes, draining jobs, debilitating emotions, illness, drugs and alcohol,consumerismingeneral,andforeveryoneultimatelyandinevitably,death.

WithChet,we cross through a gateway and leave behind naive optimism.Chetmarksaninitiationoutofinnocenceintoanawarenessofthedangersthatunderlie our lives. The Book of Job says God “suspends the earth onnothingness.”1Adeeppartofusfearsfallingintoorbeingswallowedupbythatabyssofnothing,theinfinitevoidthatwaitsjustbelowourfeet,justbeyondournextthought,justbeyondournextbreath.

Nevertheless,Chet’sanimatingforceisthatofchayim,life.Thechallengeissummarizedbythetitleofthebook,FeeltheFearandDoItAnyway.Chetcallsus toallowamatureawarenessofdeathanddanger to informanddeepenourembraceoflife.Deathcanbecomeanally,helpingusrealizethepreciousnessoflife. “A good warrior is always afraid,” advises the grandmother in aModocIndian tale. Chutzpah means “gumption and audacity.” Chet teaches “holychutzpah,”thewillingnesstomakemistakes,totakechancesandmoveintotheunknowninordertocreatesomethingnew.

TheformofChetsuggestsabridge,withthetophorizontallineconnectingthetwoverticalones.RebbeNachmanofBreslovtaught,“Allofthisworldisaverynarrowbridge.Andaboveall,havenofearatall.”RebbeNachmanknew

about confronting fear. His beloved son died in infancy. The rabbi onceundertookaperilouspilgrimagetotheHolyLandattheheightoftheNapoleonicwars.And,formuchofhisshortlifehelivedwithbipolardisorder.Nonetheless,RebbeNachmanwasabletocrosstheverynarrowbridgeofhislifewithgoodhumor,wisdom,andcourage,whichcontinuetoencourageandenheartenmanyto thisday.Hepredicted, infact, that,“mylightwillglowuntil thedayof theMessiah.”

AnotherHasidicmaster,RabbiMosheLeib,said,“Thewayinthisworldisliketheedgeofablade.Onthissideisthenetherworld,andonthatsideisthenetherworld,andthewayoflifeliesinbetween.”2ThewayoflifeisthewayofChet.

Wu-men,atwelfth-centuryChineseZenmaster,echoesRebbeNachmanandRabbiMoshe: “At the very cliff edge of birth and death, you find the GreatFreedom.”3Wewalk that cliff edge at all times.Chet calls us towalk itwithchesed,graceandloving-kindness,andexperiencethisfreedom.

Gary Snyder writes in his poem “Walking Home from ‘The Duchess ofMalfi’”:

Painsofdeathandlove,Birthandwar,

wrecktearth,bless

Withmorelove,

notless.4

Thiswayofblessingisnotaneasyway.Chet’sisnotaneasypath.Ittakestimeto ripen into the wisdom, chochmah (anotherChet word), of embodying thisattitude toward life and fear. Many Jewish holidays last for eight days,suggestingthataperiodoftimeisrequiredbeforewepassthroughthegatewayandreachcompletion.Transformationdoesn’tusuallyhappenallatonce.

TheeightdaysofChanukah, forexample,honor thecyclingof timeat thewintersolsticeandrecallthemiracleofoneday’sworthofoillastingforeight.By eating and living in humble sukkot, huts, for the eight days ofSukkot,werememberthefortyyearsthattheJewsdweltinhutsduringtheirsojournintheSinai.IntheDiaspora,PassoverisobservedforeightdaystocommemoratetheescapefromEgyptandtheHebrews’longyearsofwanderinginthedesert.By

lastingforeightdays,theseholidaysallowustodeepenintosacredtimeandtofeelmoredeeplyhowourancestorsstruggledthroughthechallengesoflife.

Ascelebrated in Israel, theeighthdayofSukkot isknownasbothSheminiAtzeret, “Retreat of the EighthDay,” andSimchat Torah, “Rejoicingwith theTorah.” (In theDiaspora, these holidays are celebrated on two separate days.)Withtheharvestcomplete,SheminiAtzeretmarksthetraditionaldayforprayingfor rain to help the next season’s harvest. Simchat Torah celebrates thecompletionoftheannualcycleofreadingsoftheTorahandthebeginningofthenext cycle.BothareChet-poweredholidays in that theycelebrate endings andthe jumping off into the unknown, into theChet, infinity, of new beginningsonceagain.

RebbeNachmanactuallyencouragedliteral jumpingonSimchatTorah.Hetaughtthatonthisdaypeopleshoulddanceandturnsomersaultsandleapoffthegroundinanefforttodefygravityandtranscendthelimitationsofthephysicalworld. Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan writes that when we dance with the Torah onSimchat Torah, “we are expressing the fact that on this day we are able totranscend the physical…going beyond any barriers and boundaries that werethoughttobeimpossibletoovercome.”5

ThisisthechutzpahofChet:tojumpoutintotheinfinite,intotheunknown,beyondthebarriersthatseemtoholdusback!

Chet’sShadowTofeelthat“allofthisworldisaverynarrowbridge,”asRebbeNachmanputit,can be overwhelming. We can become paralyzed with fear, unable to movealongthebridgeatall,orpanickedbyfear,actingwildlyanddangerously.ThechallengeofChetistomakefearanally,sothat,ratherthanadrainandaterror,itconnectsusmoredeeplytolifeandbecomesasourceofenergy.

WehaveseenhowChetisasignofchadash,thenew.Whilefreshnessandinnovation are wonderful, it’s easy to become addicted to newness. Do weconstantlycravenovelty?Areweneversatisfied?Dowedisparageorwantonlydeconstruct the time-honored and venerable? New doesn’t always mean“improved.”Onthecontrary,whathasstoodthetestoftimemayoftenbemoresoundandhavemoreintegritythanthelatestinvention.

Chet is the first letter of cheit. Usually translated as “sin,” cheit literallymeans“tomissthemark.”Chet’simpulsivitymayneedtobetempered,andwe

maybewell-advisedtoaimalittlebetterbeforemakingaleap.Cheit isalsoareminderofthenegativeaspectsofchutzpah,suchasarroganceandrudeness.

PersonalCommentsAttheweddingofmyfriends,RabbiAryehcalledmeunderthecanopytoofferablessing.Ihadbeensittingjustafewfeetawayfromthechupah,butassoonas I walked underneath it, I felt I had just come within an invisible butextraordinarily powerful force field. The feeling reminded me of the time IenteredthesacredarborduringaLakotaSunDance.WhenImyselfwasmarrieda fewweeks aftermy friends’ wedding, I found the chupah to be amagical,alchemicalcontainer.

Chet is thechupah.Chet setsupa transformational forcefield.Within thatforce field miracles happen. By the time we emerge through the gateway ofChet,ourliveswillhavebeendeepenedandenlivened.L’chayim!

SummaryforChet

Numericalvalue: 8

Meanings: Life.Fear.Grace.Chutzpah.

Application: Movetoahigherlevel,takingthingstoanewoctave.

Passthroughagatewaytonewbeginnings.

Feelthefearanddoitanyway.

Shadow: Becomingincapacitatedbyfear.

Alwayscravingthenew.

Indulginginarrogance,rudeness,pushiness.

Reflection: WhatmetaphoricalchupahamIenteringinto,standingwithin,oremergingfrom?

Suggestedaction: Dosomethingtodaythattakessomechutzpah.

CHAPTERNINE

TET

(teht)

SOUND:tNUMERICALVALUE:9

MeaningsThe Talmud teaches that it is a good sign when the letterTet shows up in adreambecausethefirstTetintheTorahappearsintheword ,tov,“good”:“God saw that the light was good.”1 Tet symbolizes essential, fundamentalgoodness.

Tet is a symbol of the primal energy of the feminine. The letter takes theform of a snake coiled in on itself. For centuries before the serpent becameassociatedwithevil, itwasarepresentationofthedivinefeminine.Tet’sshapesuggests a vase or a cup, symbols for the womb. As the ninth letter and thenumbernine,Tetholdstherhythmoftheninemonthsofpregnancy.Thisletterofgoodnesscontainsthepowerofgestationandthepotentialoflife.

At the same time,Kabbalists associateTetwith a key image ofmasculinepotency,therodorthestaff,becauseitisthefinalletteroftheHebrewwordfor“rod,” , shevet, and the central letter of “staff,” ,mateh. Staffs andserpents are closely linked to each other in folklore and imagery.Moses casts

down his staff and it becomes a serpent. Then, he picks up the serpent and itbecomes a staff once again.2 A curious incident occurs during the Israelites’wandering in thedesert.Toprotect thepeople frompoisonous snakeswhobitandkilledthem,Moses,inshamanicfashion,buildsacopperimageofasnakeandsetsitonapole.Whenpeoplearebitten,theylookuponthiscopperserpentandarehealed.3

Theimageoftwosnakesoradouble-headedsnakeentwinedaroundastaffisanancientone,predating theIsraelites. It symbolizes thepotentminglingofthemasculineand the feminine,and isconsidered life-givingandhealing.Theimage survives to this day as the caduceus, thewand ofHermes.TheSeal ofAesclepius,thesignofthemedicalprofession,consistsofasimilarimage,thatofa single snakewrappedarounda staff.Tet is akindof caduceusorSealofAesclepiusinletterform.

However,Tetisalsolinkedwithdeath.KingsmarkedburialplaceswiththesignofTet.Inseverallanguages,thewordfordeathsoundssimilartoTet(whichsomepronounce“teth”),suchastheEnglishword“death”andtheGermantot.

This letter isassociatedwith teet, theHebrewword for“mud.”Mud is thematrix of both death and life. All beings return to the earth when they die,absorbedback into themud.Butmud is also primalmatter, ormater,MotherNature,theoriginoflife,fromwhichcreationsprouts.

Tet, therefore, represents the procreating, the gestating, the flowering, andthedecayingofall things.Tet teaches thatallof this, thisendlesscycleof lifeanddeath,istov,good.

ApplicationAsChet, the previous letter of theAleph Beit, carries the energy ofmarriagethrough its form as the chupah, the wedding canopy, this ninth letter, Tet,contains the next phase of life: the power of conception and pregnancy, bothliterally andmetaphorically.Tet is central to theHebrewword forbed,mitah.Beds are the locus of procreation, where the male unites with the female tocreatenew life.Tet is a signofnewcreation.WhenTet appears inourhands,goodquestions toaskare:Whatnewlife isgrowinginsideme?Onwhat levelandwithwhatamI“pregnant”?What ishidden,gestating,gettingready tobeborn?

Pregnantwomenoftenfeeltheinstincttonest,toretreatandprotectthenew

life growingwithin.ChoosingTet offers anopportunity toquietly cherish andnurture a new idea or project, letting it gradually mature inwardly beforeexposingittothesometimesharshoutsideworld.

Tetmay also indicate a stage of shedding, theway a snake sheds its skin.Whathaveweoutgrown,whatdoweneedtoletgoof,letdie,inordertomakewayfornewlife?

Tetmayrepresentaperiodofquietreflectionandprotection.Asnakeisveryvulnerableafter ithas shed itsold skinandbefore itsnewonehas toughened.It’satimetolaylowandavoiddanger.

The tovofTet isadeep,profound, innergoodness, theprimalgoodnessofcreation, independent of circumstances. Two brothers once asked the Hasidicleader, theMaggid ofMezritch, how itwas possible to blessGod equally forboththegoodandthebad.TheMaggidtoldthemtovisithisstudentRebZusyatofindtheanswer.RebZusyawasterriblypoorandpain-ridden,butwhenthebrothers found him and asked him their question, he was perplexed. “I don’tknowwhytheMaggidsentyoutoseeme.I’veneverhadabaddayinmylife.”4

Inlikemode,ZenMasterYun-Menaddressedhisassembly,“Idon’taskyouabout the fifteenth day; come, giveme aword about after the fifteenth.” Thefifteenth day is the day of the full moon, which symbolizes completion orenlightenment.Yun-Menisasking,inotherwords,“Don’ttellmeaboutthestateof enlightenment,when everything is complete and full.What doyouhave tosay about after enlightenment?” None of his students could respond, so,answeringhisownquestion,Yun-Menreplied,“Everydayisagoodday.”

Yun-Men’spronouncementiseasytomisunderstandortrivialize.LikeRebZusya,Yun-Menisspeakingatthelevelofessential,fundamentalreality.Thesetwoteachersarenotsugar-coatingsuffering.Theyarenot,likeDr.PanglossinVoltaire’sCandide,pontificatingthateverythinghappensforthebestinthisbestofallpossibleworlds.

Yun-Men’s words, resonating through the centuries, form the basis of afamous Zen koan. Koans are not inexplicable puzzles; they are direct, cogentpresentationsof fundamental reality.They represent essential themesof life tobe made clear.Koans are to be embodied, not merely speculated upon. Howdoesoneembody“everyday isagoodday”?This is thechallengeof theZenstudentasheorshetakesupthiskoanwiththemaster.

Thechallengecan’tbemetthroughnaive,facile,pollyannishoptimism.Thegoodness Reb Zusya and Yun-Men are expressing goes beyond superficialphilosophizing to a direct experience of fundamental life.Tet challenges us to

experience life at this profound, absolute level, where the essence of God’screation is thepowerof thingsas theyare,a levelatwhich“good”and“bad”ceasetoexist.

Ontherelativeplane,on theotherhand,wheregoodandbadandallotherdualities live,wemustkeepoureyesopento therealityofevil,act toweakenevil’sforce,andaspiretothehighestgood.

We have seen thatTet is key to theHebrewwords for “rod” and “staff,”shevetandmateh.Davidsingsofthepoweroftherodandthestaffinapsalminfused with the energy of Tet, “Though I walk through a valley of deepestdarkness,Ifearnoharm,forYouarewithme;YourrodandYourstaff—theycomfortme.”5Eveninthemostdireofcircumstances,thisstaffcandispelfearandhelpusexperiencethat“everydayisagoodday.”TheletterTet,whichisshapedlikeacup,remindsusthatourcuprunsoverwithblessings.Evenifwecan’tseeitnow,goodnessisgrowingwithinusandwillsoonbebornintotheworld.“Onlygoodness(tov)andsteadfast loveshallpursuemeall thedaysofmylife.”6

WhenTet appears, this caduceus in letter form, it is a time to balance themasculineand femininepartsofourselvesanddrawon theircombinedpower.Tetisapotentletterthatactivatespotentialbyhelpingusbecomepregnantwithnewinspirationandthenhelpingtogestatethisnewseedorlifeuntilitisreadytoemergeintotheworld.Then,Godwilling,inthefullnessoftime,wewilllookatournewcreation,and,liketheHolyOneinthebeginning,pronounceit ,tov,verygoodindeed.

Tet’sShadowTotrulyunderstandandexperienceeverydayasagoodday,withoutclosingoureyesandheartstotherealityofpainandsuffering,isahugetask.OnedangerofTet is toapply“positive thinking” inasuperficial fashion.“Oh, it’sall for thegood,” we blithely say, denying parts of ourselves by adopting a cheerfulphilosophy.Theword“pollyannish”comesfromtheever-cheerfulheroineofasentimental nineteenth-century novel.What is dangerous about pollyannism isthatitactuallyempowerstheshadowtoultimatelyarisewithmoreforce,eitherfromwithinorwithout.

Then, there is the danger of imposing this “positive thinking” onto others,blaming victims of illness or accident, for example, for not being positive

enough in their attitudes and thus bringing their diseases or injuries uponthemselves. It’seasy topolarizeexperience, trying tostaveoff theharshpainsandconfusionsoflifebytryinghardtoconvinceourselvesthateverythingreallyisfine.Tet,ontheotherhand,representsbalance,notpolarization,acceptance,not denial, groundedness, not fanaticism, awareness, not sentimentality. Tetdoesn’tavoidthegriefofdeathevenasitembracesnewlife.

PersonalCommentsIhadafriend,mayherestinpeace,namedDr.FrancescoPatricolo,aneccentricgeniuswho,amongotherthings,performedjazzrappoetry.Inoneofhispieces,Francesco sang, “In theFifties, Iwas aBeatnik, an evolutionaryEdsel. In theSixties,IwasaHippie,anunusedbyproductoftheIndustrialRevolution.IntheSeventies, IwasaPunk,aone-manband ina roguebathtub. In theEighties, IwasaYuppie,astainedglasswindowinazoo.Now,intheNineties,atthecloseoftheTwentiethCentury,I’maDumpyGrumpy.”7

I sometimes feel like aDumpyGrumpymyself.At those times, theworldseemsharsh,peoplelookugly,andeverythingappearsbleak.Tethasthepowertobreakmeoutofaspellofgloomandnegativity.Tetcomfortsmewithawarmfeeling. I feel safe within its shelter. Gradually, I becomemore aware of thegoodthatunderpinsmylife.Maybetodayisagooddayafterall!

SummaryforTet

Numericalvalue: 9

Meanings: Goodness.Serpent.Staff.Mud.

Application: Enjoyatimeofconceptionandgestation.

Shedwhatisoutgrownandneedstobeletgo.

Cultivatethecreativepowerofthefeminineandthepotentpowerofthemasculine.

Shadow: Over-emphasizing“goodness.”

Pollyannishoptimism;facilepositivethinking.

Reflection: WhathaveIoutgrown,whatdoIneedtoshed,toletgoof,inordertomakewayfornewlife?

Suggestedaction: Plantaseed.Then,protectandnurtureitasitgestatesandsprouts.

CHAPTERTEN

YUD

(yudrhymeswith“should”)

SOUND:yNUMERICALVALUE:10

MeaningsYud is the smallest letter of theAleph Beit. Nonetheless,Yud has tremendousprimalforceandenergy.Yud isadynamo,apowerhouse.Yudshares thesameHebrewrootas ,yad,whichmeansboth“hand”and“power.”

Infact, tinyYudcontainsinfinity.AccordingtotheBigBangtheoryofthecreation of the universe, all matter emerged from a tiny point that explodedoutwards, expanding andgradually coalescing intogalaxies and solar systems.Yud represents that beginning point, that small seed from which the wholecreationsprouts.

Yud is theelemental, initiating forceof life.TheHebrewroot forYud alsomeans“tothrust.”AfterthemarriageofChetandtheconceptionandgestationofTet,Yudthrustsitswayintoexistence.

Yudisacosmicletter.It’stheonlyletteroftheAlephBeitthatissuspendedinmidair,notgroundedinthesoilofthisworld.

The Talmud teaches that God used the letterHei to create “ThisWorld,”while the letter Yud was used to create “The World to Come.” In Hebrewgrammar, Yud indicates the World to Come by denoting the future tense of

verbs.Theprimordial,initiatingenergyofYudcomesforthinsomeofthewordsit

begins.YudisthefirstletterofthemostholynameofGod,the ,Yud-Hei-Vav-Hei(orYHVH).AnabbreviationofYHVH,thehonorific ,usuallyreadasAdonaiandtranslatedintoEnglishas“Lord,”isspelledwithtwoYud’s.YudbeginsanothercommonnamefortheDivine, ,Yah.It’salsothefirstletteroftheJewishpeople, ,Yisrael.Thistiniestofletterssparksthemightiestofwords.

Yud’spowerisalsoreflectedinitsnumber.Yudequalsten.Childrenlearntocount on the ten fingers of their yadayim, hands. (As in English, theHebrewwordforhand,yad,alsoconnotes“power,”asinthephrase“thehandofGod.”)Ten is the basis of the decimal system.With ten songs, the Holy created theworld.Therearetencommandmentsorutterances,tensefirotorbranchesontheTree ofLife, and ten people needed to constitute a prayer quorumorminyan.TheholiestdayintheJewishcalendarisYomKippur,thetenthdayofthenewyear. The basic, powerful number of Yud, ten, is one root of our ability tomeasureexistence.

ApplicationYudcarriesus fast,onapowerfulwaveof transformation, into the future, intotheworld tocome.OnewriterdescribesYud as“acosmicmessengerbringingmovement and change into our lives.”1 The word for “exodus,” ,yetziyah,beginswiththisletter.WhenYudthrustsitswayintoourlives,wearebeingpropelled,maybewilly-nilly, into anew levelof experience.Anexoduscan be scary, exciting, tragic, promising. Yud shows that no matter how anexodusfeelstous,it’simpossibletoholdontothepast.Lifecontinuallypropelsusintotheunknown.

ThepowerfulenergyofYudisconcentratedinitssmallform.Thisletter,notmuch more than a point itself, encourages us to come to the point, toconcentrate.HowcanwebestfocusourenergiesinordertorideYud’swaveoftransformation as gracefully as possible and arrive safely at a new location?That’slittleYud’sbigquestion.Wemaybecalledupontoprioritize,toletgoofwhat is no longer needed, to become clear aboutwhatwe trulywant to carrywithusintothefuture.

Yud is a letter of great force, yet, being so small,Yud is also the sign of

humility. Yud is certainly not inflated, puffed up, ostentatious. Its power iscontained,almosthidden.Yud iseasy tounderestimate.Moses,madeshybyaspeechimpediment,anddescribedinTorahas“veryhumble,”2nonethelessledawholenationonanexodusoutofslaverytofreedom.MountSinai,wherethismodestmanspokedirectlywithGodandreceivedTorah,wasarelativelysmall,unimposing-lookingmountain.Even theHebrewswere (andare)a small tribe.TheTorahdescribesthemas“amongthesmallestofallthenations.”3

Smallness and humbleness don’t impede greatness, however. The Zoharsays, “Whoever humbles himself, God raises.”4 Yud calls us to humbleourselves,toloosenattachmenttoego,butatthesametimenottounderestimateourtremendouspowerandpotentialforcreativityandloveandliberation.

Micah gives a prescription for acting in accord with Yud’s energy: “Dojustly,lovekindness,walkhumblywithyourGod.”5Movingthroughtheworldwith this type of attitude is an exodus out of narrow egoism to expansivefreedom.

ApoembytheSufipoetRumiexpressestheparadoxembodiedbyYud:

IamsosmallIcanbarelybeseen.Howcanthisgreatlovebeinsideofme?Lookatyoureyes.Theyaresmall,

buttheyseeenormousthings.6

Having humility ismore easily said than done, of course. Once, twowealthybusinessmen were competing to show who was the most devout. After thelengthysynagogueserviceswereoverandeveryoneelsehadleft,eachremainedinhisplace,continuingtopray.Theretheystayed,whilethetempleshamash,orcustodian, swept and straightened up around them. Finally, one of thebusinessmen stood up and loudly proclaimed, “In the eyes of God, I amnothing!”andsatdown.

Soon,thesecondbusinessmanstoodupandshouted,“IntheeyesofGod,Iamnothing!”Then,hesatdown.

Theshamash,very impressed,hadbeenwatchingthis,andinspired,he tooyelled,“IntheeyesofGod,Iamnothing!”

Thefirstbusinessmanthenturnedtothesecond,pointedattheshamash,andwhisperedderisively,“Lookwhothinkshe’snothing!”

Yuddoesn’tcallforfalsemodesty,affectedhumility.Rather,itchallengesus

to feel aligned with the grand sweep of cosmic energy thrusting us and theuniverseforwardandoutwardintothefuture.Hangontoyourseat.Yudistakingyouontherideofyourlife!

Yud’sShadowAstheonlylettersuspendedinmid-air,YudistheleastgroundedofthelettersoftheAlephBeit.AdangerofYud isbecomingun-grounded,or“spacingout.”Ifwe’refocusingtoomuchontheexodus,onmovinginto“theworldtocome,”wemaybemissingwhat’srightherebeforeus.Ifwehaveourheadsintheclouds,wemaystumbleontherockinourpath.Weneedtopayattentiontothepresent,evenaswemoveforwardintothefuture.

The holy exodus thatYud embodies can become distorted andwind up aschronic displacement and restlessness. Yud calls us to move toward what weloveinsteadofmerelyrunningawayfromwhatoppressesus.

Yud moves quickly and powerfully and brings these transformationalqualitiestoourlives.Excessiveandfreneticmotion,however,canbeupsettingorunhealthy.Sometimeschangejustgrabsholdofusandwe’reoff!Butothertimes, through focused intention or action,we can temper the change, slow itdownalittletoamoremanageablepaceandscope.Changeforitsownsakeisoften not helpful. But change is inevitable. Yud’s challenge is to feel settled,eveninthemidstofchange.

PersonalComments“Wherearewegoing?”alittlerascalasksStymieintheold“OurGang”movieseriesasthekidscareendownhillinamakeshiftgo-cart.“Idon’tknow,brother,butwe’reonourway!”repliesStymie.

WhenYud thrustsmeforward,andthewindiswhistlingbymyears,andIknowsomeradicalchangeistakingplaceandinfactispickingupmomentum,IthinkofStymie. “We’reonourway!”TheWorld toCome is comingon fast.HumilityarisesnaturallythenasIrealizeIhavenoideawhat’sgoingtohappennext.At times like that, Iprayforgraceandcomposure in the faceofchange,andIcryouttoYah,toYud-Hei,forprotectionandguidance.

SummaryforYud

Numericalvalue: 10

Meanings: Hand.Power.Thrust.

Application: Alignoneselfwithmovementandchangebyclarifyingprioritiesandlettinggoofwhatisnolongerneeded.

“Dojustly,lovekindness,walkhumblywithyourGod.”

Shadow: Becomingun-grounded,“spacingout.”

Fleeing.

Excessiveandfreneticmotion.

Reflection: HowcanIbestfocusmyenergiesinordertorideYud’swaveoftransformationasgracefullyaspossibleandarrivesafelyatanewlocation?AmIholdingontoopinionsandegoattachmentsthatmightimpedeYud’stransformationalpowerormakeforabumpierride?

Suggestedaction: Whatkindoffuturedoyouwant?Thisveryday,takeasmallsteptowardrealizingit.

CHAPTERELEVEN

KAF

(kahf)(finalform: )

SOUND:kNUMERICALVALUE:20

MeaningsAsthefirstletterof ,kisay,“throne,”and ,keter,“crown,”andakeyletter inmelechandmalchah,“king”and“queen,”Kaf isasignofroyaltyandmajesty.

Keter isalsothenameofthehighestsefirahorbranchontheTreeofLife.Eachsefirah reflectsanaspectorenergyof theDivine.Keter is the“crownofGod,”therealmthatisclosesttoHeaven,beyondhumancomprehension.

The name of the lowest branch of the Tree of Life, , Malchut,“kingship” and “queenship,” also contains Kaf. Malchut is the abode of theShechinah, the feminine aspect of the Divine. It is the realm closest to ourearthly,physicallife.

Kaf, therefore, isconnected toboth theuppersphereand the lower. It isatoncetranscendentandthegroundofbeing.Kaf isoneoffiveletters thathasadistinctformwhenitappearsattheendofaword.ThefinalformofKafextendsbelow the lineofwriting, symbolizing the connectionof theheavenly and the

earthly,KeterandMalchut,spiritandmatter.Asaword,Kaf, ,meansthepalmofahand(andthesoleofafoot).Palms

areassociatedwithproductive labor,as in thephrase“the toilofyourpalms.”Palmsrepresentthepowertocreateorachieve.

ApplicationThe characters in fairy tales, as in dreams, embody archetypes that point toqualitieswithineachofus.Kingsandqueensarekeyfigures instoriesaroundthe world. Sometimes in these tales princes or princesses wander lost in theworld, unaware of or cut off from their royal heritage. They must undergovarioustrialsanddeepeninwisdomandlifeexperiencebeforetheycanreclaimtheir rightfulplaceon the throne.The letterKaf is thedream, thefairy tale,ofinner kingship and queenship. Kaf calls us to claim, in our lives, moresovereigntyandmajesty.

William Stafford’s poem “A Story That Could Be True” addresses thispossibility:

Ifyouwereexchangedinthecradleandyourrealmotherdiedwithouttellingthestorythennooneknowsyourname,andsomewhereintheworldyourfatherislostandneedsyoubutyouarefaraway.Hecanneverfindhowtrueyouare,howready.Whenthegreatwindcomesandtherobberiesoftherainyoustandonthecornershivering.Thepeoplewhogoby—youwonderattheircalm.Theymissthewhisperthatrunsanydayinyourmind,“Whoareyoureally,wanderer?”—andtheansweryouhavetogive

nomatterhowdarkandcoldtheworldaroundyouis:

“MaybeI’making.”1

“MaybeI’making.”“MaybeI’maqueen.”Kafremindsusthat,nomatterouroutwardsituation,weareeachthekingandqueenofourexperience.AsKeterandMalchut are woven into the very fabric of existence as revealed by theircommandingplacesintheTreeofLife,theinnerKeterandMalchut,crownandkingdom/queendom,areinherentinourverynatures.

How would one act if one were a king, a queen? With what dignity,responsibility,andassurancewouldonecomportoneselfanddealwithothers?WhenKaf appears, it’s anopportunity to act as if thiswere the case, not in agrandiose or arrogant fashion, not tyranically, but in away that embodies thearchetypeof thenoble,goodkingorqueen. Inmythand story, thegood rulerrestores order, health, creativity, and prosperity to the land. Embracing thepowerofKafcanhelpbringthesequalitiesintoourlives.

“Majesty” is defined as sovereign power, authority or dignity, grandeur;greatnessorsplendorofqualityorcharacter.Kafisacalltomajesty,tosplendor.The most influential book of Jewish mysticism is The Zohar, referred to inEnglishasTheBookofSplendor.“Splendor”herereferstothebrillianceoftheDivine, and also to the brilliance of its creation, including humans. To claimsplendoristoclaimourbirthrightaschildrenoftheHolyOne.

Kaf,as“palm,”beckonsustocreatesomethingsplendidintheworldthroughtheworksofourhands.Thiscreationcanliterallybetheworkofourhands,suchassewing,woodworking,pottery,cooking,orartorhandicraftofanysort.And,of course, this creation can be thework of our hands in ametaphorical senseonly.Kaf’smessageisthateachofushasauniquegifttooffer,abrilliancethatonlywecanbring intoexistence.Related toboth“creation”and“crown,”Kafconveysthepowertocreatea“crowningachievement,”anobleaccomplishmentthat helps manifest the kingdom and queendom of the Divine right here. Torealizeacrowningachievement,onemusthaveastrongandfocusedintention,orkavanah,anotherwordenergizedbyKaf.

Forcenturies,Jewishsageshave taught thatstrongkavanah isessential foreffective prayer and the fulfillment of sacred acts. Kabbalistic texts are filledwith detailed instructions and practices for achieving transcendental statesthroughfocusingone’sconcentration.

Cultivatingaclear,focusedintentionhelpswiththeaccomplishmentofany

act,however,notjust“mystical”ones.Thewordkavanah, ,comesfromtheroot,kiven, ,“toaim.”Kafcallsus toaimthoughtsandactionscarefully, tobest realizeourgoals.Whenweaimwithconscious intent,wearemuchmorelikely tohit themark.Determination, courage, perseverance, focused attention—allarequalitiesofkavanahwhichthisletterKafevokes.

Invariousmartialarts,suchastaichiandaikido,thestudentlearnstofocusand circulate chi or ki, the life energy and vital force of one’s body and theuniverse.AHebrewword for “strength” or “energy”, , koach, beginswithKaf.Often,koachorki isdirectedthroughthepalmsofthehands.Throughitsmeaningas“palm,”Kafleadsustochannelourownlifeenergywiththeclarity,control,andpowerofamartialartist.Ifwehavebecomescatteredorunfocused,Kafisthesensei,therebbe,themaster,whohelpsreconnectustotheflowofkiinthedojo,thetrainingcenter,ofourlife.

In this way,Kaf as kavanah andKaf as “palm” unite to guide us towardgreatermasteryandpoweraswe focusour intentionandaimour life strengthandenergytowardamajesticgoal.

Kaf’sShadowPowerisseductive.Iteasilycorrupts.Akingorqueenmaybecomeatyrantandabully.Asitcallsustogreaterpowerandmajesty,Kafhasthepotentialtobeabused. Arrogance, haughtiness, self-righteousness, manipulation are some ofthepitfalls.

Will isa trickymatter. Ifwearenotcareful,strongandclear intentioncanquickly cross the boundary into destructive willfulness. Before we know it,we’vebecomedespots.Aprecautionagainstbecomingtrappedinthisdynamicwhen working with the powerful energy of Kaf is to remember the simpleprayer,“Notmywill,butYoursbedone.”

PersonalCommentsImovequicklytowardAkiFleshler,theaikidoinstructor,myhandraisedasiftostrikehim.Suddenly,Ifindmyselfflyingthroughtheair.ThenextthingIknow,I’monthegrass,lyingonmybackwiththebemusedinstructorstandingseveralstepsaway,eyeingmecalmly.How’dhedothat?ItseemedasifhehadhardlymovedinresponsetomyattackandyethereIam,undisputedlyontheground.

SenseiFleshlerwasamasterofki.Withsubtlemovementsofhishandsandbody,andapowerfulintention,hehadbeenabletoredirectmyownenergytosend me flying. The letter Kaf is the aikido master of the Hebrew alphabet.Grounded,intent,dignified,andpowerful,Kafisaletteryoudon’twanttofoolaroundwith or underestimate.What a forceful ally, however, to have on yourside! When Kaf is fully integrated into our being, we move with assurancethroughchangingcircumstances,intunewiththeflowingkioflife.

SummaryforKaf

Numericalvalue: 20

Meanings: Palm(ofthehand).

Melech,king,andMalchah,queen.

Keter,crown.Kavanah,intention.

Application: Actasifonewereakingorqueen.

Developastrongandclearkavanah.

Shadow: Becomingatyrant.

Arroganceandwillfulness.

Reflection: WhatisauniquegiftIhavetooffer,abrilliancethatonlyIcanbringintoexistence?HowcanIbestbeginorcontinuetomanifestthatgift?

Suggestedaction: Forthirtyminutestoday,comportyourselfasifyouwereanoble,courageous,good-heartedkingorqueen.Andspeaktoothersasiftheytoowerekingsandqueens.

CHAPTERTWELVE

LAMED

(lah’mid)

SOUND:lNUMERICALVALUE:30

MeaningsTheHebrewrootforLamed, ,meansboth“tolearn”and“toteach.”Italsorepresentsagoadoraprodforguidingoxenorcattle.

Asaprefix,Lamedmeans,amongotherprepositions,“to,”“toward,”“into,”and“unto.”Lamedindicatesmovementtowardsomething.

Itisalsothefirstletterof ,lev,heart.LamedisthetallestletterintheAlephBeit.Traditionallydescribed“atower

soaring in theair,”Lamedascendsabove theupper lineof thescriptofall theotherletters.

ApplicationIftallLamed,thissignofanox-goad,liftsitsheadintooursights,weourselvesmayneed tobegoaded intomovement. Is theresomeprojectoractivityabout

whichwecoulduseaprodding?Lamedsignifiesatimeforgettingthingsgoing,for initiating action. If we have been procrastinating, Lamed is the goad thatsays,“Allright!Timetogetmoving!”

BecauseLamedisthefirstletteroflev,heart,thismovementisalignedwithourinnermostbeing.Whereisourpassionanddelight?Since,asapreposition,Lamed means “to” or “toward,” this letter symbolizes aspiration, and themovementofthehearttowardagoalorpurpose,towardtheheart’sdesire.

A student asked the Seer ofLublin to showhimone universalway to theserviceofGod.ThegreatrabbirepliedthatitwasimpossibletotellpeopleonespecificwaytheyshouldtaketotheserviceofGodbecausethereweresomanyways and each person is so different. The Seer gave this advice, however:“Everyone should carefully observe what way their heart draws them to, andthenchoosethiswaywithalltheirstrength.”1

Lamedprodsus tocarefullyobserveand thenchoosewithallourstrength.What’s holdingusback?Arewe livingout someone else’s visionofwhatwemightbeordo,insteadoffollowingourownheart’surging?

Orisituncertainty,despair,lackofconfidence,fearthat’smakingithardtocommittoacourseofaction?

Rumiwrites,

Thesespiritualwindow-shoppers,

whoidlyask,Howmuchisthat?Oh,I’mjustlooking…Evenifyoudon’tknowwhatyouwant,buysomething,tobepartofthegeneralexchange.Startahugeandfoolishproject,likeNoah.Itmakesabsolutelynodifferencewhatpeople

thinkofyou.2

Whenwearebesetbyambivalence,procrastination, timidity, or confusion,by

anything that inhibits appropriate action,Lamed encourages us. “Choose!” theletterprods.“Buysomething!”

AsthebiggestletteroftheAlephBeit,Lamedencouragesusto“thinkbig,”tostartahugeproject.Evenifitappearsfoolish,wewillundoubtedlylearnfromthe experience. As DanMillmanwrites inTheWay of the PeacefulWarrior,“It’sbettertomakeamistakewiththefullforceofyourbeingthantocarefullyavoidmistakeswithatremblingspirit.”3

Regretsaboutourlivesmorelikelycenteronactionsnottakenthanonactivemistakes.RebZusya taught thatafterhisdeath, in thenextworldhewon’tbeasked,“Zusya,whyweren’tyoumorelikeMoses?”Instead,he’llbechallenged,“Zusya,whyweren’tyoumorelikeZusya?”

This isourchallenge: tobecomefullyourselves, tobecompletelywhoweare, truetoourcore,ourlev,notshrinkingbutstandingtall inourownuniqueindividuality,liketheletterLamed.

Life is the process of learning who we are and , Lamed, means“learning.”Sometimesthislearningtakesplaceinaformaleducationalsetting.Choosingthislettercanindicateapropitioustimetotakeaclass,pursueacourseofstudy,gobacktoschool.Butthesettingdoesn’treallymatter.Lamedremindsusthatourjobistolearnwhereverwefindourselves,tobeastudentoflife.

Lamedalsomeans“toteach.”Learningandteachinggohandinhand.Jewishtradition has always placed a great deal of value on both. Themelamed, orchildren’s teacher,has longbeenanhonoredposition. In fact, thenameof theheartoftraditionalJewishstudy,theTalmuditself, ,comesfromtheroot

,Lamed.Learningandteaching,tobemosteffective,musttouchthelev,heart.Lamed

cautions us against dry, cynical, abstracted learning, or dull, passionlessteaching.Heartiswhatmovesus,heartiswhatcreatesmemorableteachers,andheartiswhatenablesustotouchothers.

Lamed,thisletterofprodding,learning,teaching,aspiration,andheart,isthefinalletterofthefinalwordintheTorah,Yisrael.It’sabigletteranditcarriesgreat power. When we align ourselves with Lamed’s primal energy, weexperiencepowerfullessons,learningwhowearemeanttobe.

Lamed’sShadowThe prod of Lamed can get out of hand.We become driven, never satisfied,

constantly goading ourselves or others or being goaded into more and moreeffort. Instead of fostering creativity and accomplishment, this drivenness canleadtoworkaholismandexhaustion,evenmadness.

If we focus Lamed’s energy of study and learning too narrowly on justbookishlearning,wecanbecomeover-cerebral,divorcedfromthebodyandthenaturalworld.Let’snotforgetkinesthetic,activelearning,artisticlearning,andthemany other varieties of education that don’t depend on books andwords.When we remember that the word for “dance,”machol, contains Lamed, thespirit of dance can inform our learning and save it from becoming dry andlifelessandoutofbalance.

“Thinking big” can easily become grandiosity and conceit. Egotism,morethantheheart’saspiration,maydriveadesiretostandoutfromthecrowd,aboveitall,liketallLamed.Wemayneedtorememberthat,asE.F.Schumacherputit,“small isbeautiful.”Thegrandword, ,Yisrael, afterall,beginswith thesmallestletteroftheAlephBeitbeforeendingwiththebiggest.Ourmagnificentambitionsmayneedtobetemperedwithsomehumility.

PersonalCommentsAn extraordinary storyteller lived in Boston, Massachusetts, named BrotherBlue.During intermission at one of his performances, Iwent up to thank thisvenerable bard. Brother Blue was friendly and unpretentious. He asked me,“Whatdoyoudo?”IwasbetweenjobsatthetimeandIhemmedandhawedandwasstartingtosaywhatIusedtodo,whenBrotherBlueinterruptedme.Fixingmewith sharp eyes, he said forcefully, “What do youwant to do?” Again, Ihemmedandhawed,andfinallyheloweredhiseyesandletmeoffthehook.

But the point had beenmade. TheLamed, the goad, of his remark struckhome.WhatdoImostwanttodo?Whatismydeepestpassion?Andwhatdoesthe Holy want of me?What is my destiny? Frederick Buechner wrote, “TheplaceGod calls you to is theplacewhereyourdeepgladness and theworld’sdeephungermeet.”4

Brother Blue’s words focused all these issues for me. His simple, yetpowerful, question continues to urge me forward, helping me clarify myintentionandmovetowardmyheart’sdesire.Lamedprodseachofus,“Whatdoyouwanttodo?”

SummaryforLamed

Numericalvalue: 30

Meanings: Goad,prod.Teaching.Learning.Heart.Aspiration.

Application: Getmoving.

Thinkbig.

Learnandteachinaccordwithone’sheart.

Shadow: Grandiosity.

Workaholism.

Narrowbookishness.

Reflection: Whatismypassionanddelight,myheart’sdesire?Whataresomewaystomovetowardthisdesire?

Suggestedaction: Thisveryday,takethefirststepstowardaccomplishingaprojectortaskyou’vebeenputtingoff.

CHAPTERTHIRTEEN

MEM

(mehm)(finalform: )

SOUND:mNUMERICALVALUE:40

MeaningsAccording to the Sefer Yetzirah, the seminal text ofHebrew lettermysticism,there are three Mother letters in the Aleph Beit, each of which represents afoundationalelement. ,Aleph,standsforair. ,Shin,representsfire. ,Mem,istheletterofwater.TheHebrewwordforwater, ,mayim,beginsandendswith Mem. Many water words start with Mem, such as mayahn, “spring”;mizraka, “fountain”; andmotza, “source.”Mem represents the flowing, fluidrhythmoflife.

Inmanylanguages,thewordsfor“sea”andthe“m”sounditselfarerelatedtothewordsfor“mother.”Forexample,inHebrew, ,yahm,means“sea,”and

, aym, means “mother.” In French, mer means “sea” and mère means“mother.”Wateristhefirstmother.Forninemonths,akindofeternity,wefloatinthesaltyseasofourmothers’wombs.“Mama”isoneofthefirstwordsbabiesspeak.“Mmm,”grown-upsstillsaywhensomethingtastesgood.

ThisMother letter, Mem, embodies the mothering quality of compassion.

The word for “womb,” , rechem, is the root of rachamim, “mercy” or“compassion.” The Torah describes Thirteen Attributes of Mercy that wererevealedtoMosesonMountSinai.MemisthethirteenthletteroftheAlephBeit.Inmanycultures, thirteenisanumberofwoman’spower,as thereare thirteenlunar and menstrual cycles in a solar year. The Thirteen Attributes ofMercyinclude kindness, generosity, tolerance, awareness, patience, compassion, andlove.1

In the Hebrew numerical system,Mem equals forty, a number associatedwithpurification.Atraditionalmikveh,theceremonialbathofpurification(mostcommonly used by Jewish women after completing their menstrual cycles),contains at least fortymeasures of rainwater.TheGreatFlood lasted for fortydays and forty nights. , Moses (whose name, which starts with Mem,means“drawnfromthewater”),fastedandprayedforfortydaysduringeachofhisthreesojournsonMt.SinaitoreceivetheTorah.TheHebrewswanderedforfortyyearsinthedesertbeforebeingdeemedreadytoenterthepromisedland.Fortyrepresentsawashingclean,acycleofpurification.

The ultimate purificationwill bewhen the “knowledge ofGod covers theearthasthewaterscoverthesea.”2Then,theworldwillbereadytoreceive,orembody the consciousness of , Mashiach, the Messiah, whose namebeginswiththeMotherletter,Mem.

ApplicationEachofusisnaturallyintimatewithwater.Allofusfloatedinthewombwatersprior to birth. Every day, water enters our mouths and courses through ourbodies. Sixty-five percent of our bodies, in fact, consist ofwater.Mem is theletter that pours forth this sustaining, essential ,mayimchayim, thewateroflife.

WhenMem flows intoour lives,wearecalled tobecome likewater, fluid,flexible, unstuck.Mem carries us along when we “go with the flow.” Thisdoesn’t mean mindlessly or indulgently conforming to specific socialexpectations,orbeingtotallypassive.Rather,itmeansallowingourselvestobeborneontheriveroflifeinanatural,organicway.

Part of the flow of life is the stream of emotions.Are there places in ouremotionalliveswherewearestuck,wherethere’salogjam?Memencouragesustosearchforwaystoallowouremotionstoflowonceagain.Areweattempting

toholdbackafloodofgriefbybecomingemotionallyfrozenornumb?Theword for “tumor” in theMayan highlands of Guatemala translates as

“solidifiedsorrow.”TheMayansbelievethatifpeopledon’tgrieveadequately,which includes, but is not limited to, freeing the flow of tears, sorrow thenhardensandcausesphysicalandemotionalproblems.Thesolutionistofindsafewaystoloosentearssothatthesademotionscanbecomeliquidonceagainandpassthroughandoutofthebodyinsteadofbecomingstuckinside.3

Memencouragesustonourishlifewithourtearssothathappinesscansproutforthoncemore.RebbeNachmanofBreslavwrites,“HowverygooditiswhenyoucanawakenyourheartandpleadtoGoduntiltearsstreamfromyoureyes,andyoustandlikealittlechildcryingtoitsparent.”4

IntheGrimmBrothers’ taleof“TheWaterofLife,”akingliesdying,andthe onlywayhe can recover is if someone can find and retrieve theWater ofLife.Onebyone,theking’sthreesonsheadoutonaquesttofindthispreciouswater.Theyoungestsoneventuallysucceedsingainingentrancetoanenchantedcastle.Yet,beforehecan locate the fountain fromwhichsprings theWaterofLife, hemust pass through a large hall full ofmenwhohave turned to stone,earlierseekerswhogotstuckandfrozen.

Inhiscommentaryonthisstory,MichaelMeadewritesthatlivinginthisage“is likewalking throughagreatweeping. It is likeanongoing funeral, ahugeshedding of the life of the world…When the heart knows sorrow and neverweeps,thesorrowgetslockedlikeastorminsidetheheart.Whenthestormcan’tpourout, it turns solemn, it becomesa stoneweight.Grievingclears theheartandkeepsitopen.”5

Inordertofindthesacredwaterthatrestoreslifetothekingdom,wemustbeabletobeartheknowledgeofdeathandlosswithoutturningtostone.Grieving,initsvariousforms,enablesustodothis.

Grievingisoneformofpurification.Themikveh, theritualbath, isanotherkind of purification.WhenMem shows up, it’s time for a literal or figurativemikveh, immersing oneself in the rejuvenating and cleansing mayim chayim,waters of life. This can be a literal mikveh or a figurative one, such as therenewalofasolitarywalkintheforest.Thekeyistowashawayoldaccretionsinordertobebornafresh.

Mem invitesustoexamineourselvesandseewhatisnotflowinginaccordwithourdeepestdesires,andthentoreaffirmourintentiontoliveinaccordwiththesedesires.Mem’spurifying influence inspiresus toembodymore fullyand

consistently the Thirteen Attributes of Mercy. As we express compassion,kindness,patience,weharmonizewiththemotheringenergyofMem.

,Miriam, whose name begins and ends withMem, embodiesmanyqualitiesof this letter.Miriamhelps saveherbabybrother,Moses,whenhe iscastintotherivertoavoidPharaoh’sdecreethatallHebrewboybabiesmustbekilled.Sheisalsoanotedmidwife.AfterpassingthroughthewatersoftheRedSea, Miriam leads the Hebrew women in song and dance. The water fromMiriam’s well, and the manna (anotherMem word), enable the Hebrews tosurviveduringtheirfortyyearsofwanderinginthedesert.

SelectingMem may also indicate a time to refresh the flow of currencythrough one’s life. If money and sustenance do not seem to be circulatingadequately for us,what canwedo toun-dam the current and let it flowmorefullyandfreelydownfromtheholymountainswhere thesnowsofabundancegather?

Onepracticalstrategyforincreasingtheflowofabundanceinourlivesistoremembertobegrateful.Memastheletter,thesign,ofMiriam,leadsustosingand praise the holymystery for our survival up to this point.We’vemade itthrough somedeepwaters.Our struggles aren’t overyet, butwe’re still alive!Mem also reminds us that deep wells exist of which we may not be aware.Hidden, ancientunderground streams fill thesewells.Whenwe find themanddip our buckets,we tap into those deep currents of life. The old, old flow ofmayim chayim then sustains us even as we proceed through themidbar, thewildernessandthedesert.

Mem’sShadowTheTorahspeaksnotjustofmayimchayim,butof“evilwaters”thatsymbolizedestructiveorhurtfulpassions.Torrentsoffeelingsmayoverwhelmus,washingaway a sense of right and wrong.We may be flooded by big emotions. ThechallengeofMemistoswiminthewateryrealmsofemotionwithoutdrowninginthem,andwithoutlosingsightofthesolidgroundofmorality.

AnotherdangerofMemistohangontooursorrowasamarkofhonororasourceofidentityinsteadofreleasingourtearsandmetabolizingthemintosomeformofcreativityasanofferingtotheearthandtotheHoly.Whenwecanofferup and transform our tears in thisway, they nurture new life and prepare thegroundfornewblessingstogrow.

PersonalCommentsI’minaLakotasweatlodge.Pitchblack.Extraordinarilyhot.Sweatisstreamingoffmeontothecedarshavingscoveringtheground.AlthoughalltheceremonialsongsuptothatpointhavebeenintheLakotalanguage,theleadersurprisinglybeginsasonginEnglishandHebrew.“Drawwaterinjoyfromthelivingwell.Drawwaterinjoyfromthelivingwell.Mayimchayim,watersoflife,shalom.”6

How strange and beautiful to hear the Hebrew words from Isaiah in thisNativeAmericancontext.When thedoorof the lodgeopensat theendof thatprayerround,abucketofwaterisbroughtin.Beforeweeachdrinkadipperofthepreciouswateroflife,theleaderpoursalittleofitontothehotrocksinthecenterof the lodgeasanoffering.“Miniwakan,”hesays inLakota,“Miniwachozen.” “Water is sacred, water is life.” After being so hot and sweating somuch,we draw thewater out of the bucket and drink itwith joy indeed.Theleaderteachesthatwaterismedicine;itisholy.Tomythirstyandsweatybodyat that moment, this is obvious and delightful fact, not just theory or fancysentiment.

Out in theworld, the letterMemcontinues to remindmeminiwakan,miniwachozen. ,Mayimkadosh,mayimchayim.Waterissacred,waterislife.

SummaryforMem

Numericalvalue: 40

Meanings: Water.Womb.Mercy.

Application: Expresscompassion.

Lettearsflowandletsorrowbemetabolizedintocreativity.

Aspiretobefluidandflexible.

Shadow: Becomingfloodedbydestructivepassions.

Drowninginsorrow.

Reflection: ArethereplacesinmyemotionallifewhereIamstuck,wherethere’salogjam?WhataresomewaysIcanfreemyemotionstoflowmorefluidly?

Suggestedaction: Withinthenextsevendays,experiencesometypeofmikveh.Thiscouldrangefromafull-fledgedformalmikvehtoaquickdipinastreamorlakeorevenyourownbathtub.Mostimportantistohaveanintentionofpurificationasyouimmerseyourself.Afterwards,enjoyasimplecupofwater.

CHAPTERFOURTEEN

NUN

(thevowelsoundinNunrhymeswiththevowelsoundof“should.”)(finalform: )

SOUND:nNUMERICALVALUE:50

MeaningsIn the order of theAleph Beit, afterMem, the letter of water, comesNun. InAramaic, theancientSemitic languageclosely related toHebrew, theword ,nun,means“fish.”

The great fish that swallowed Jonah is a famous nun of the Bible. Jonah,with the letter Nun central to his name, had disobeyed the will of God. Hewoundupbeingcastoverboardandthenspendingthreedaysinthebellyofthefish. In the midst of the giant nun, instead of death he found life, instead ofdestruction, renewal. Jonah emerged from his ordeal alive and transformed(althoughhestillhadlessonsyettolearnaboutcompassionandforgiveness).

Nun as “fish” also represents fertility and productiveness. Fish reproducerelatively quickly. InGenesis, fishwere the first creatures to be blessed, “Befruitful and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas.”1 Fish also make good

fertilizer, helping cropsbecomemoreproductive.Nun is related to the root oftheHebrewwordsfor“tosprout,”nav,and“toflourish”or“toblossom,”n’nun.

But,intheparadoxicalwayofmanyoftheHebrewletters,Nunalsosignifiestheoppositeof sprouting and flourishing, as it is related to , the rootof theHebrewwords for“decline”and“degenerate.”Nunencompassesbothcreationanddestruction,ebbandflow.Like fishswimmingamid thechanging tidesofthesea,Nunisathomeinthechangingcircumstancesoflife.

Nun represents the number fifty. After a cycle of seven times sevensabbaticalyearscomestheJubilee,Yovel,thefiftiethyear.(Seechapter7,Zayin,formore information on sabbatical years.)During the Jubilee year, slaves arefreed,debtsareforgiven,andlandreturnstoitsoriginalowner.TheJubileeisaperiodoffreedomandliberationandreturn.

InKabbalah, fifty is also thenumberof the “gatesofunderstanding.”Thefifty gates correspond to the fifty days of the Omer (literally a measure ofwheat), theperiodbetweenPassoverandShavuot.Passovercommemorates theescape fromenslavement inEgypt, andShavuot celebrates the transmissionofthe Torah toMoses onMt. Sinai.Nun marks the process of breaking out ofbondageandmovingtowardrevelationandhome.

Jubilee,Yovel, literallymeans “the horn of a ram.” It is the sound of therams’ horns that helps destroy thewalls of Jericho.The personwho leads theHebrews in that battle is Joshua, referred to throughout theTorah as “Joshua,son ofNun.” AfterMoses dies, the son ofNun is the one to finally lead thepeopleintotheirpromisedhomeland.

ApplicationJustasJoshuabroughtdownthewallsofJericho,sotoodoesNunbreakdownwalls in our lives. Both self-imposed and externally-imposed limitations fallbefore the power of Nun. Many types of walls exist: hatred, fear, prejudice,ignorance.Nunbringsencouragementthatthesewallscancometumblingdown.LikeJonah,wecanfindlifeandhopeinanapparentlyhopelesssituation.

But, as in thecaseof Jonah, resurrectiondemandsa radical transformationonourpart.Somethinghastodiefornewlifetocomeforth.Aftersurvivinginthebellyofthebeast,wecan’tjustgobacktobusinessasusual.Nunchallengesus to liveas ifwehademergedfromthedepths,miraculouslybroughtbacktolife,cherishingwhatistrulyimportantandlettinggoofoutmodedself-conceptsandold,negativepatternsofthinkingandacting.

Nunbreaksthroughconstrictionsandbreaksdownbarriersandleadsustoajubileeofemancipation.Nunsings, inthewordsof theNegrospiritualandthefamous “I have a dream” speech ofDr.MartinLutherKing Jr., “Free at last!Freeatlast!ThankGodalmighty,wearefreeatlast!”ThisisthedreamofNun.

Onewaytomakerealthedreamoffreedomissuggestedbytheday-by-dayprocessofcountingtheOmer.Thissymbolicallyandmetaphysicallyretracesthepassageof the Jews from their newfoundescape fromslavery to theprofoundrevelationof theDivine through theTorah.Thispassage isagradual, step-by-stepjourney.Ithasmanymomentsofdoubt,ofbackslidingandfear.Weneeddisciplineandperseverancetotravelfrombondagetoenlightenment.Nunleadsus on the path of liberation fromwhatever is constricting and oppressive, andencouragesus,“Keepwalking!ThePromisedLandliesahead.”

When counting theOmer, one enumerates, “Today is the (nth) day of theOmer.” For Kabbalists, each day of the Omer corresponds to a differentcombination of qualities of the Sefirot, the branches of the Tree of Life.Onemeditates upon and seeks to embody the particular qualities of that day. TheFiftyGatesofUnderstandingcannotbepassedthroughallatonce;it’sagradual,life-long,process.Infact,ifonepassesthroughthefiftiethgate,onehaspassedbeyondourcurrentplaneofexistence.

At thesametime,whenthewallsofdelusionfall, theyfall!Enlightenmentcomessuddenly,provokedbyasound,asight,aword,asmell.Theworldrushesforward,separationsandbarriersvanish,andstep-by-step,day-by-daycountingorpracticefallscompletelyaway.ThePromisedLandisrighthere!Partofthetension,thedialectic,ofNunisbetweensuddenliberationanddailydiscipline.

How do we handle the awesome responsibility of freedom? The escapedslaves, the Hebrews, receive the Ten Utterances and the Torah to help them.Freedom doesn’t mean we can do whatever we want. Our behavior iscircumscribedwithinanethicalframework.

AfterreceivingtheTorah,theHebrewsspendfortymoreyearsofwanderingbeforetheysettledown.Afterrevelation,lifecontinues,stepbystep,daybyday.This, then, is the truestuffofourfreedom:eating,sleeping,walking,working,playing, praying, talking, singing. The road to the Promised Land is thePromisedLand.

In Robert Louis Stevenson’s fable “The Poor Thing,” a poor fishermanproposesmarriage to the daughter of a wealthy nobleman by saying, “Come,behold avisionofour children, thebusyhearth, and thewhiteheads.And letthatsuffice,foritisallGodoffers.”2Common,everydaylifeisitselfthegreat

treasure.“Freeatlast!”singstheoldspiritual.Nunbeginsandends ,niggun,the Hebrew word for “tune” or “melody.” We could say that niggunim are“Jewish spirituals.” These wordless hymns are intended to break down wallsbetweenthehumanandtheDivine,tocarrythesingeruptoecstaticheights,toopenthegatesofheaventhemselves.WhenNunswimsintoourlives,it’sagoodtimetolearnandsingsomeniggunim.Theyopenourheartsandliftourspiritsandhelpwallscomefallingdown.

Nun’sShadowFisharecoldandfishareelusive.IfweembodyNuntooliterally,wemaytrytoavoidpeoplebyheadingunderwater,bydivingdeepoutofsight.Notwantingtobecaught,wecanwindupswimminginlonelywaters.Tryingtobefree,wecanwind up trapped within self-imposed caverns. Nun challenges us to find ahealthy balance of freedomand discipline, of spontaneity and practice, of ebband flow. If we grasp too hard at just one of these dichotomies, we findourselvessnaredonthelineofdualisticthinking.

PersonalCommentAttheoldKokoAnZenCenterinHonolulu,therewasaninscriptiononthehan,thewoodenblock that is struck to signal time: “Like a fish, like a fool.”Thisdescribes a certain kind of freedom, a lack of self-consciousness, a totalimmersion in themoment that is lauded inZen.Nun symbolizes this freedom,thatofafishswimminginwaterorabirdflyingthroughair,naturallyathomeinthemediumof their lives.Nun doesn’t care for clevernessorgood ideas.Nundoesn’tcarewhetherI“succeed”or“fail”atsomething.WhenNunshowsup,Iremindmyself,“Becomemorefoolish,andmorefoolishyet.Belikeafish,likeafool!”

SummaryforNun

Numericalvalue: 50.

Meanings: Fish.Fertility.Growthanddecline,descentandresurrection.Jubilee.

Application: Swim,athomeamidtheebbingandflowingcurrentsoflife.

Breakdownwallsofseparation,ignorance,fear,hatred.

Enjoyajubileeoffreedom.

Shadow: Coldness.

Aloofness.

Reflection: AmIclingingtoanyoutmodedself-conceptsandold,negativepatternsofthinkingandacting?HowcanIletgooftheseandswimmorefreelyinthecurrentsofmylife?

Suggestedaction: Liftyourheartandspiritbysinginganiggunforatleastfiveminutestoday.Ifyoudon’tknowaniggun,findsomeonewhocanteachyou,orseeksomeoutonline,ormakeupone,singing“dai,dai,dai”toyourowntune.

CHAPTERFIFTEEN

SAMECH

(sah’mech)

SOUND:sNUMERICALVALUE:60

MeaningsThenameof the letterSamech is related to theHebrewroot “support”or“prop.”Samechisthesignofdivinesupportandprotection.Theongoingnatureof this support is embodied in the unbroken shape of the letter— it has nobeginningorend.Itsscriptformisaperfectcircle.

TheinsideoftheSamechishidden,shielded.Samechinitiatesso-hirah,theHebrewwordfor“shield”and“buckler.”ThePsalmistsingsthatthetruthoftheDivine“shallbeyourshieldandbuckler.”1

The sukkah,orhut,whichalsostartswithSamech,isaliteralformofshelter. Other less physical sources of support that beginwith this letter are:

,sefer, “book”; ,siddur, “prayerbook”; and ,sippur, “story.”Eachofthesecanbeacontainerorvesselofsustenanceandprotection.

TheHebrewroot,Samech,means“tosupport”aswellas“tobesupported.”Samech is thus a letter of interdependence, of mutuality. Nothing exists in a

vacuumorinisolation.Everythingdependsoneverythingelse.Wesupportevenaswearesupported.

BuddhistsdescribethisvastwebofconnectionastheNetofIndra.Ateachknoton thisnet is aunique jewel.Every individual jewelperfectly reflects alltheotherjewelsinthenet,andcontainsallthereflectionswithinitself.

TheEnglishwordforonetypeofjewel,sapphire,comesfromtheHebrew,,sefirah.Thesefirotarethevesselsofdivineenergyinanothermodelof

existence, theKabbalisticTreeofLife.Samechand the final formofMemarethe only two letters in the Aleph Beit that are completely enclosed. Like thejewelsontheNetofIndra,eachsefirahiscompletelyuniqueandself-contained,whole unto itself, closed, and yet at the same time totally connected to theothers.Also,eachsefirahcontainsalltheothersefirotwithinit.

Whiletheself-enclosednatureofSamechmakesthisletter’senergyhardtopenetratewhen threatenedorattacked, italsocanmake ithard topenetrate, inthe sense of being understood. Samech initiates the words sod, “secret,” andsodi,“mysterious.”

The Sefirot themselves are hard to understand. Traditionally, one wasdiscouragedfromeventryinguntilonewasmarried,atleastfortyyearsold,andhadbeenformallyacceptedasastudentbyarebbewhohimselfwasqualifiedtoimpart these secret teachings. Their intensity was considered too great andpotentiallydangeroustoberevealedtotheuninitiated.Self-enclosedSamechisfullofsecret,containedpower.

S’micha, ,ordination,startsandisruledbySamech.Rabbis,cantors,maggidimorstorytellers,preachers,healers,andjudgesallreceives’micha.Itisanenergeticempowermentdirectlytransmittedfromteachertostudent.

Samechequalssixty.Solomonhadabodyguardofsixtyheroes,valiantmenwhoguardedhimwhileheslept.“ThereisSolomon’scouch,encircledbysixtywarriors of Israel, all of them trained in warfare, skilled in battle, each withswordonthighbecauseofterrorbynight.”2Samechassixtyencircleseachofuswithinitsprotectiveforce-field.

ApplicationThe tension of Samech is between interdependence and independence,supportiveness and secrecy.When Samech circles into our lives, we confrontthis twofoldnature.Samechchallengesus to findabalancebetween these two

tendencies.Nowwecomfort, nowweare comforted.Nowwepraise,nowwearepraised.Nowwegive,nowwereceive.Tobecomestuckononesideortheotherofthisgive-and-takedisruptsSamech’scircularflowofenergy.

TheBookofEcclesiastessaysthereisatimeandaseasonforeverything,forgivingbirthandfordying,forseekingandforlosing,forkeepingquietandforspeaking.WhenSamech,thissignoftheprop,showsup,it’satimeforproppingsomethinguporallowingourselves tobeproppedup.Whatneedsoursupporttoday?Inwhatwayscanweallowourselves tobesupported?Whataspectsofournaturewouldbenefitfromsupport?

It can be hard to open up enough to be able to receive support.Samech’sself-containedformillustratesthetendencytoholeuporisolateoneself.Wecantry to hidewithin a shell, circle thewagons and barricade ourselves from theoutsideworld,butitwon’twork.Soonerorlater,theworldbreaksin,ifonlyinthe formof thewaterwedrink, theairwebreathe, thebirdsongwehear.Thechairsupportsusevenasweslumpallaloneatthelonelytable.Canweletgoandenjoythegeneroussupportthechairprovides?

TheReverendMartinLutherKingJr.wrote thateveryone is“caught inaninescapablenetworkofmutuality,tiedinasinglegarmentofdestiny.”3

As one Zen teacher put it, “We are all members of the same nose-holesociety.”4

Samechchallengesustoclaimourplaceinthissociety,toopenourselvestoour particular spot in the Net of Indra, to engage in the give and take, theintercourseoflife.

Assometimeshappenswithsexualrelations,however,wecangiveawaytoomuch. We can get wounded in unhealthy ways. We can lose our treasure.Besides being the sign of mutual support, Samech is also the sign of self-containment,shielding,protection.Itiswisetoguardcarefullythejewelsofourinnertreasure.Andalsonottocovetsomeoneelse’s.

“Tellawiseperson,orelsekeepsilent,because themassmanwillmock itright away,”writesGoethe.5Samech is the letter of sodot, secrets.When is itwiseandprudenttobesecretive,andwhenisituptightandfearful?Whenisitmostappropriatetobeopenandsharing,andwhentobeguardedandshielded?There is a time and a season for everything, but sometimes it’s hard to knowwhattimeitisrightnow!

Samechcansupportusinfindingahealthybalancebetweenthesepoles.TheSamech-energyof thesixtyvaliantwarriorswhoguardedKingSolomonwhile

heslept, swordsat the ready, is alsopresent toprotectus.Samechprotectsbyremindingusthattheretrulyisnothingoutsideus.WaltWhitmanwrote,“Iamlarge.Icontainmultitudes.”6Fundamentally,everythingiscontainedwithintheprimalcircleofSamech.Wearesafe.

Samech’sShadowOneaspectofSamech’sshadowhasalreadybeenmentioned—thetendencytobecomeblockedoffandshutdown.Samechisaletterofprotection,butit’seasytobecomeoverlyguardedandexcessivelydefensive.Wemaywanttocomeoutofseclusionandjointhehora,thecirculardance,ofcommunity.

Samechcanalsoholdthetwinpitfallsofbecomingeithertoosupportiveortoo dependent on other people. We can over-extend, going beyond what ishealthy forourselforothers.On theotherhand,wecan lose sightofourownintactandcontainednature,andbecomeexcessivelydependentonsomeoneelse.Whenwe findourselves lost in either extreme,we can takeourselves in handandbequietwithin the sukkah, the shelterofourownunique, interconnected,mysteriousself.There,ourtreasurewaitsforus.

PersonalCommentsOurPassoversederwasjustabouttoend,andwewantedtosingonelastsong.Deborah thought of a good one, a modern chant in English that was easy tolearn. “We are a circlewithin a circle,with no beginning, and never-ending.”Thatwasit.Thewholesong.Thelastlinecircledbackintothefirstsuchthatthesong just kept going andgoing, buildingpower as people’s voices grewmoreconfident, and becomingmore rich as harmonies were added. Finally, after along,almostecstatic,time,thechantwounddownandoursederwasover.Ourcirclewascomplete.

Samech(whichbeginstheword ,seder),representsthiscirclewithinacircle. The Passover seder itself circles back to our ancestors as wecommemorate their struggles for liberation. Samech reminds me that, likeEzekiel’s vision of awheelwithin awheel, I ampart of circleswithin circleswithincircleswithincircles.Allthesecircleshavethepowertospinmeoutofself-centeredness, at least for a little while, and remind me of the sod, themysteriousnatureofourinterconnectedness.

SummaryforSamech

Numericalvalue: 60.

Meanings: Tosupport.Tobesupported.Prop.Secret.

Application: Findabalancebetweeninterdependenceandindependence,supportivenessandsecrecy.

Shadow: Becomingblockedoffandshutdown.

Becomingeithertoosupportiveofortoodependentonothers.

Reflection: Whoorwhatneedsmysuccor?WhatkindofnurturanceorassistancedoIneed?

Suggestedaction: Inatangiblewaytoday,supportsomeoneelseandallowyourselftobesupported.

CHAPTERSIXTEEN

AYIN

(i’yin)

SOUND:silent1

NUMERICALVALUE:70

MeaningsAyin, , means “eye,” and its name sounds like this English word. Ayinrepresents various types of seeing such as insight, foresight, outlook, andperspective.

Eyes need light in order to see. Ayin, therefore, is a letter of light andenlightenment,aswellasofsight.“Wherethereisnovision,thepeopleperish,”says Proverbs.2 A seermaintains a vision for the community, and thus helpskeeplifealive.Ayinisthesee-eroftheAlephBeit.

This seer quality ofAyin is reinforced by its numerical value.Ayin equalsseventy.Mosesappointedseventyelderstobethe“eyesofthecommunity”andhelp him judge the people. These seventy became imbued with the power toprophesy, and in thisway gained the perspective needed to judgewisely.TheseventyeldersbecamethemodelfortheSanhedrin,thehighestreligious/judicialcourtofIsrael.3

Ayinalsomeans“spring”or“source.”

Application“Openyoureyes!”isAyin’sfundamentalchallenge.Toactuallynoticethethingsofthisworld,totrulyseewhatisbeforeus,isanawesometask.Whenourmindsaresofullofthoughtsthatwebarelypayattentiontowhat’sinfrontofus,wearenot really seeing.So,oneway toapply the lessonofAyin is to lookmoreclosely at theworld.What are the subtle textures of the clouds, the shades ofblue and gray in the sky?What color is this person’s eyes?Howdo the treesswayinthebreeze?AsYogiBerrasaid,“Youcanseealotjustbyobserving.”

TheJapanesepoetBashōwrote,

WhenIlookcarefully—Nazunaisblooming

Beneaththehedge.4

Nazuna is the small plant called “shepherd’s purse” in English. It’s easy tooverlookor take forgrantedas justaweed,butonobservingcarefully,Bashōappreciates it profoundly. Ayin urges us to look with equal care on oursurroundingsinordertofullyappreciateandnotoverlooklife.

At the same time,Ayin, as the letter of insight, leadsus to lookwithin, togazebeyondsurfaceappearancestotheinnerworkingsofasituation,toseeallthe way to theAyin, the “spring” or “source.” Aswe sharpen our vision anddeveloptheabilitytoseewhatisnotapparenttothephysicaleyealone,wegainadeeperperspective.Forexample,wemaybecomeawareofwordsunspoken,of subtle emotions, of fears and desires and insecurities that underlie thebehavior of others and ourselves.We develop, as we gain in insight, a morecompassionateandlessreactiveoutlook.

Withoutaspiritofcompassion, theAyinof insightcanturnintoayinhara,the evil eye. This is the judgmental stare, the cold gaze, the jealous look, thehardeyesfullofcursing.RebbeNachmansaid,“Takecare,thereismuchpowerinaglance. Ifaccompaniedbyamalicious thought, itcancauseharm.This iswhatisknownastheevileye.”5

Ayin’schallengeistobediscerningwithoutbeingdemeaning,toletkindnesstemperthekeennessofoursight,tokeepoureyesopentoevilandgreedinthe

world,withoutbecomingcynicalorhopeless.Asthesignof theseventy judgesMosesappointed,Ayin isa letterofwise

judgment,ofcriticalperception.WhenAyincomesintooursights,it’satimetolook carefully and evaluate clearly the matters before us, to deliberate as adistinguishedjudgemight,overthefactsofthesituation,perhapstoviewitinadifferent light.We need to watch out that we not be naively gullible and letsomeonepullthewooloveroureyes,orpermitourselvestobehoodwinkedbythatwhichwishesusnogood.

Also, wemust be conscious of our own projections and prejudices whichmightskewoursight.Libra,astheimageofimpartialLaw,wearsablindfoldassheholdsthescalesofjusticeinherhands,inorderthatshemayseeandjudgeclearlyandfairly.

Sometimessightcangetinthewayofadeeperkindofseeing.Tiresias,thefamousseerinGreekdramaandlegend,wasblind.TherenownedHasidicrabbiJacob Yitzhak, known as the Seer of Lublin, was said to have very pooreyesight.Ayin is a letter of intuition, of inner sight and foresight, asmuch asliteral seeing. Choosing this letter is a call to acknowledge and trust ourintuition, to pay attention to our dreams. A prophet is clairvoyant, from theFrench word for “clear-seeing.” Ayin calls us to cultivate such clear seeing,whichmaybelatentanddormantwithinus.Webeginbynoticingandhonoringintuitivefeelings,andnotreflexivelydismissingthem.

Astheletteroflight,Ayinshedslightonmattersathand.WhenAyinshowsup, it’s time to illuminate somedarkplaces, togather informationand insight.Thetimeisripeforenlightenment.ZenmasterWu-men,writinginthethirteenthcentury, describes the experience of enlightenment as walking “hand in handwithall theAncestralTeachers in thesuccessivegenerationsofour lineage—the hair of your eyebrows entangled with theirs, seeing with the same eyes,hearingwiththesameears.”6

The ChristianmysticMeister Eckhart said, “The eye throughwhich I seeGodisthesameeyethroughwhichGodseesme;myeyeandGod’seyeareoneeye,oneseeing,oneknowing,onelove.”7Realizingthisintimatemutualseeing,whenoneseesGod“eyetoeye,”8istheultimateaspirationofAyin.

The“thirdeye”istheseatofwisdominmanyEasterncultures.Thisspot,ontheforeheadaboveandbetweenthetwoeyes,isthelocationforthetefillin,thephylacterieswornduringmorningprayers.ChoosingAyin is anopportunity topray thatour thirdeyebeopened, thatwegrowinwisdomandinsight.“Open

myeyes,thatImayperceivethewondersofyourteaching”isAyin’sprayer.9AsweareabletolookthroughtheeyesofAyin,webegintomakerealthe

inspiredvisionofJoel:“Yoursonsandyourdaughtersshallprophesy,youroldmenshalldreamdreams,youryoungshallseevisions.”10

Ayin’sShadowOne shadow of Ayin manifests in a very literal way. When we are movingtoward“thelight,”yearningforenlightenment,ourshadowisbehindusandwemaybeunawareofthisdarkside.Theabusesofpowerandsexfoundinmanyreligious communities is evidence of this tendency for seekers of the light tobecomeblindtotheirowndarkernaturesortoaverttheireyesfromseeingthefaults of spiritual leaders. The Talmud cautions, “The greater the sage, thegreater the evil inclination.”Ayin demands clearyet compassionatevision andwisejudgmentofbothourselvesandothers.

Ayin is sometimes a symbol of coveting and greed. “The eyes ofman areneversatisfied,”saysProverbs.11Ifwearepronetothe“roamingeye,”alwaystryingtofillupwithnovelsightsornewpeople,thislettercanbearemindertocultivateaninnerseeingthatdoesnotgraspforsatisfactionoutsideofoneself.

PersonalCommentsThewell-diggerarrivedatourruralpropertyinhisbigtruckloadedwithpipesandwinches and huge augers.He emerged from the large rig holding a smallforked stick, a divining rod. The burly fellow then walked around the land,diviningrodinhand,feelingforthesubtledownwardtugontheendofthestickthat would indicate underground water and a propitious spot to sink a well.Finally,thesignswereclear.Atacertainspot,hesaid,twoundergroundstreamsconverged. Here was where the well should be located. He even accuratelyestimatedtheapproximatedepthatwhichwewouldhitwater.

Shaped somewhat like a divining rod, the letter Ayin helps us divine, toforesee, by looking beneath the surface of things and finding undergroundcurrentsof thoughtsoremotionsorenergies. Itsverynamemeans“source”or“spring.”Whenthisletterappears,Iremindmyselftonoticesubtletuggingsofintuition.InsightdeepenstotheextentIcanquietmymindandallowAyintobe

myeyes,itsancientgazepenetratingtotheheartofthematter.

SummaryforAyin

Numericalvalue: 70

Meanings: Eye.Insight.Vision.Springorsource.

Application: Openoureyes.

Lookbeyondthesurfaceofthings.

Bediscerningwithoutbeingcoldlyjudgmental.

Cultivateintuition.

Shadow: Blindnesstothedarksideofourselvesorothers.

Covetingandgreed.

Reflection: HowcanIstrengthenmyabilitiesofperceptionanddeepenmyintuition?

Suggestedaction: Foratleastonehourtoday,practiceexpressingloving-kindnessthroughyoureyes,allowingthemtocommunicatekindnessandgentlenesstothoseyouencounter.

CHAPTERSEVENTEEN

PEH

(payorpeh)(finalform: )

SOUND:p,phNUMERICALVALUE:80

Meanings,Peh,means“mouth.”Itisthesignoftheprofoundlypowerfulactivitiesof

speakingand singing. InGenesis, theHoly creates the entireuniverse throughthesemeans.

Pehequalseighty.AccordingtotheTorah,Moseswaseightyyearsoldwhenhegot thecall to lead theHebrews to freedom.Moseswasable to speakwithGod“mouthtomouth”1andbecomeGod’sspokesmandespitehavingaseriousspeechimpediment!(SomecommentatorssaythatMosesstuttered,whileothersbelievehehaddifficultyenunciatingspecificconsonants.)

WhenMoses beheld the vision of the burning bush and heard the DivineVoicetellinghimtoleadtheHebrewpeopleoutofslaveryinEgypt,heobjected.Mosesarguedthathewasn’tqualifiedtobetheleaderbecausehewas“slowofspeech,andofaslowtongue.”

The Voice answered Moses’ objections, “I will be with your mouth andteachyouwhattosay.”Furthermore,Moses’olderbrotherAaronwouldhelpas

Moses’ spokesman.2 Moses is thus the prototype of one who transcendslimitationsandwhosemouthisfreedtospeakwithdivineinspiration.

ApplicationInspired speech or song is Peh’s ideal, where words flow with a spirit ofholiness,andweareabletosaywhatisneededinanappropriate,effective,andeloquentfashion.“Theheartofthewiseteacheshismouth,andaddslearningtohislips,”isthewordofProverbs.3Pehcallsustospeakandsingfromtheheart.

“Apersonhasjoybytheanswerofhis[orher]mouth:andawordspokenindueseason,howgoodisit!”4Aretherethingsthatneedtobesaid?Isnowthetimetosaythem?Pehencouragesustospeakout,tospeakup,toclaimourrighttobeheard,andnotbeafraid.

Ontheotherhand,insomesituations,prudenceandrestraintmightbemostappropriate.WhenPehappears,itisanopportunitytoweighourwords.Pehcanbe a sign to be quiet, to close themouth and listen. Speech is extraordinarilypowerful.Itcanbecreativeordestructive.Pehremindsustonotunderestimatethispower.Wemustespeciallybeonguardthatwenotindulgeinlashonhara,the“eviltongue”ofmaliciousgossiporslander.

“RightSpeech” isonecategoryof theBuddhist“NobleEight-foldPath” tocalmness, insight, and enlightenment. Right Speech includes refraining fromtelling lies, from creating disharmony through backbiting and slander, fromusingmaliciousorabusivelanguage,andfromfoolishlybabblingorgossiping.“When one abstains from these forms of wrong and harmful speech onenaturally has to speak the truth, has to use words that are friendly andbenevolent, pleasant and gentle,meaningful and useful.One should not speakcarelessly: speech should be at the right time and place. If one cannot saysomethinguseful,oneshouldkeep‘noblesilence.’”5

InaHasidictale,theprophetElijahappearsindisguiseasaraggedwandererand reproaches Rabbi Bunam and his companions as they debate theacceptabilityofthefoodbeingservedtheminastrangeinn.“OhyouHasidim,youmakeabigto-doaboutwhatyouputintoyourmouthsbeingclean,butyoudon’tworryhalfasmuchaboutthepurityofwhatcomesoutofyourmouths!”6

Jesus similarly declared, “Not that which goes into the mouth defiles aperson;butthatwhichcomesoutofthemouth,thisdefilesaperson.”7

Sometimes,notspeakingdefilesaperson.Therearetimeswhenspeakingiscalledfor.Areweholdingbackfromcommunicatingourfeelingsorideasoutoftimidityorshyness?Outofangerorresentment?Pehbeckonsustospeakwhennecessaryandappropriate,tocomeforthaswhoweareandtonothidebehindsilence.Wemayhavea“turningword” to sharewithsomeone,but itmustbespokenfor the turning tooccur.Often,weregret thingswefailed todoorsaymorethanthethingsweactuallydidorsaid.Pehurges,“Speakwhileyouhavethechance.Lifepassesquickly.Don’tletthatchancegoby.”

Theattitudewhichunderlies right speech isdescribedbyRobertAitken inhisappropriatelytitledbook,EncouragingWords:

Noble,uprightspeecharisesfromclearunderstandingthatnoneofuswillbeherevery longand it behoovesus tobekind tooneanotherwhilewecan. It arises from knowing in our hearts that we need each other andcannotsurvivealone.Ivowtospeakoutofconsiderationforthefrailtyofmy friends, andmyown frailty, andoutofconsideration forour intimatefamilyrelationship.IvownottospeakasthoughtheerrorsofotherswereingrainedorasthoughIwereseparate.8

Before reading the Amidah, a core part of every Jewish prayer service,worshipers recite the followingverse fromPsalms: “Openupmy lips,OYah,thatImaysingyourpraise.”9ThisisPeh’sprayer:tohaveourlipsbefreedtoexpress gratitude. Such gratitude,whether to theDivine or to other people orbeings, needs to be expressed out loud. The Talmud teaches that feelings offriendship should be verbalized.10 Similarly, repentance and confession areconsidered incomplete and ineffective until expressed aloud.11 All sorts ofpledges,frommarriagevowstooathsofoffice,becomeofficialonlyafterbeingspoken.Pehurges,“Speak!”

SpokenwordsareattheheartofJewishreligiousobservance.Eachweek,theTorahischantedaloud.SilentreadingoftheTorahorotherprayersisconsideredinadequate; the sound of the words must reverberate in the air to make theteachingscometolife.

Speakingandhearingareprofoundlyintimateacts.“WhenIspeak,thebonesinyourearvibrate,”saidpoetEtheridgeKnight.Pehremindsusoftheintimacyandpowerofthespokenorsungword,andencouragesustonottakethemforgranted.

Instead,withawarenessof thepotencyforgoodor illofourwords(oroursilence), we can pray with David, “Let the words of my mouth and themeditationsofmyheartbeacceptableinyoursight,ohYah.”12

Peh’sShadowTalking toomuch is one negative aspect of this sign of themouth. “A fool’svoiceisknownbymultitudeofwords.”13Wemayneedcontinuallytoremindourselvestoexerciseself-controlandbequiet.Thiscanbeanongoingpractice.

Or, we may be too quiet. Peh calls us to balanced communication, tocompassionateexpression.Someoneweknowmaydesperatelyneedakindwordspokenoramisunderstandingclarified.

The tendency to gossip, put people down, and spread rumors is all toohuman.Pehasksustoresistthistemptationandinsteadtoupliftourspeech,tohaveourwordsbewordsofblessing,notcursing.

PersonalCommentsIt’snaturalforhumanstotalk,tosing,totellstories.Sometimes,whenIdon’thave toattend to themeaningof thewordsswirlingaroundme, Icanhear thehumanvoicesassoundsofthenaturalworld,likebirdsongsorcricketchirpsorwind in the trees. In themulti-mouthed chorus of nature, humans’ sounds arejustonepartofthemix.

WhenIcanrememberthiswayofperceivinghumanspeech,I’malittlelesslikely tobecomeupsetor reactivebecauseofsomeone’swords. Ialsobecomelessself-consciousandinhibitedaboutsendingmyownvoiceoutintotheworld.After all, it’s just the sound of the earth expressing itself, the voice of naturecomingthroughasmyvoice.Pehremindsmethattheuniverseisfullofmanykinds ofmouths andmany kinds of speech. I pray that I am able to hear theharmonywithinthismultitudeofsound.

SummaryforPeh

Numericalvalue: 80

Meanings: Mouth.Communication.

Application: Speakfromtheheart.

Speakwhenneededandkeepsilentwhenappropriate.

Practice“RightSpeech.”

Expressgratitudeoutloud.

Shadow: Talkingtoomuch.

Nottalkingenough.

Gossiping.

Reflection: AretherewordsIneedtosaytosomeonethatIhavebeensilencingoutoffearortimidityorcomplacency?Isnowthetimetosaythem?

Suggestedaction: Fortoday,trytoavoidgossiping,subtlyornotsosubtlyputtingpeopledown,andallothernegativespeech.

CHAPTEREIGHTEEN

TZADI

(tsah’dee)(finalform: )

SOUND:tzNUMERICALVALUE:90

MeaningsThenameof this letter,Tzadi, , orTzadik, , is related to theHebrewroot for “just,” “honest,” and “righteous.” This root denotes such qualities asdevoutness,kindness,fairness,integrity.ATzadik,arighteousone,helpssustainthe universe through his or her virtue and good deeds. “The Tzadik is thefoundationoftheworld,”saysProverbs.1

Jewish tradition teaches that in every generation there are Lamed-VavTzadikim, “Thirty-six Righteous Ones,” who hold the world together throughtheir goodness and virtuous acts. These saintly characters are hidden, livinghumbly, and performing their wonderful and miraculous deeds in secret.Sometimestheyaredisguisedasroughandunfriendlywoodsmen,sometimesasbeggarsorsimpletons.Butnomattertheoutwardform,theintentionofaTzadikistoupliftandunify.

RabbiDavidCooperwrites,“WithouttheworkofaLamed-vavnik,thepainand suffering that would ensue would be unimaginable…It is the job of a

Lamed-vav Tzadik…to constantly improve the destiny of those around him orher.”2

ATzadik,evenwhenlivingallalone,hiddenontheedgesofsociety,servesandsustainsthecommunityandtheworld.ReflectingthefactthatonecannotbeaTzadik in isolation, but only in relation to others,Tzadi is the first letter ofmany words related to groups and communities. For example, tzibur means“community”or“congregation,”andtzevetmeans“team.”Tzedakahisthewordfor“charity,”therighteousactionthatconnectspeople.

Tzadiisthecentralletterof ,mitzvah.Thiswordisoftentranslatedas“commandment”or“gooddeed”buttherootmeaningofmitzvah is“connect.”MitzvotconnectustotheHolyOne,toeachother,andtoallofcreation.

, tzitzit, isanotherwordpoweredbyTzadi.Tzitzitare thefringesonthe four corners of a talit, or prayer shawl. Comprised of many individualthreads woven together into strands, tzitzit symbolize the Tzadi power ofconnection.AsArthurWaskowputsit,“Thetzitzitare,literallyandvisually,theWeaveofUnity.”3

ApplicationAccordingtoJewishlegend,theLamed-vavTzadikimusuallylivetheirlivesandperformtheirnobledeedssecretly.TzadiremindsustobealerttothepresenceoftheseRighteousOnes.Ifnotforthem,theworldwouldcollapse!

Whoarethesesaintlycharacterswhoarethefoundationoftheworld?Wherearethey?It’shardtoknow.Mostofthetimetheyremainhidden,indisguise,outofthelimelight.Therefore,traditionteachesthatweshouldregardeveryonewemeetasapossibleTzadik.

RabbiCooperwrites,“ALamed-vavTzadikmayhideinmanydisguises.Thepersongivingusthehardesttimemaybesavingourlives.”4Elsewhere,hesays,“Sometimes, for no reason at all,wego froma badmood to a goodmood; itcould be the result of aLamedvavnik standing nearby. Indeed, sometimes wethinkwearehavingacasualconversationwithastranger,butinfactthisotherpersonishelpingusavoidaserioustragedy.”5

It is best, therefore, if we’re not put off by surface appearances, but treateveryonewith respect, as if themaintenance of the universe itself depends onthisverypersonbeforeus.Howmightthequalityofourinteractionsimproveif

wewereabletoapproachthemwiththisattitude?As we embody this perspective, we become more Tzadik-like, more

righteous, ourselves. In our own uniqueways,we can uplift our thoughts andactionsandperformthedeedsnecessarytomaintainandsustaintheworld.TzadichallengeseachofustobecomeaTzadik.

When the letter Tzadi comes out of hiding and appears before us, it mayindicate a time to serve a team or community or congregation in a morededicated fashion, adding our energy to that of the group’s. If we’ve keptourselvesalooforseparate,nowcanbeagood time to reweaveourselves intothefabricofourneighborhoodorfamilyorgroup.

As the sign ofmitzvot and Tzedakah, Tzadi also calls us to increase ourperformance of good deeds and our acts of charity, taking our expressions ofgenerositytohigherlevels.

The Talmud teaches that the best Tzedakah is given anonymously withneitherthegivernorthereceiverknowingtheidentityoftheother.6

Mu-chou,aChineseZenteacheroftheninthcentury,fulfilledthisideal.Mu-choulivedbyhimselfinasmallhutneararoadusedbymonksonpilgrimage.Hewouldweavestrawsandalsofvaryingsizesandthensecretlyleavethembythesideoftheroad.Astheyhikeddowntheroad,monkswouldcomeuponthislineofnewsandals,findtherightsize,andcontinueonwithgratitude.Foryears,no one knew who was making the sandals. Finally, Mu-chou’s secret wasdiscoveredandhebecameknownasthe“SandalMonk.”7

ATzadiksustainstheworld,is“thefoundationoftheworld,”butformostofus,themodernmodeoflivingisnotsustainable.InordertobeTzadikiminthecontemporary industrializedworld,wemust learn and practiceways of livingthat strengthen the foundation of life and don’t undermine or erode it further.PerhapsthismeanslivingsimplyandhumblylikethelegendaryTzadikimofthepast.

Tzadi’sShadowSelf-righteousnessisoneofthepitfallstowatchoutforwhenworkingwiththeenergyofthisletterofrighteousness.BecauseTzadiisformedbytheletterNunleaningdowntowardtheleftwiththeletterYudrestingontopofit,therabbisofold taught that Tzadi represented the act of bowing down in humility.Rememberinghumilitycan temper the tendency towardgettingpuffedupwith

self-righteousness.Another danger of Tzadi is to hold ourselves to unrealistically severe

standards,toexpectourselvestobesaints,andthentobeharshlycriticalwhenwedon’tliveuptothisstandard.ThisletterchallengesustoliveasmuchofaTzadik-like life as possiblewhile at the same time being gentle on ourselves.We’re only human after all, not saints, and sometimes we find ourselves incomplicatedandconfusingcircumstances.AspiringtobeaTzadik,butkeepingagood-humored and forgiving attitude toward our own frailties and stumblings,wecanbeascompassionatewithourselvesaswewouldliketobewithothers.

PersonalCommentsIwonder:howmanytimeshaveIencounteredoneof theLamed-vavTzadikimand never known it?When the letterTzadi comes intomy life, I open to themarvelous possibility that someone I just met or will soon encounter couldactually be aTzadik. Even that personwho really bugsme.Maybe even, in aparticularsituation,Imyself!

ForTzadikimarenotjustouttheresomewhere,apartfromus.RabbiCooperwrites, “Many of us act as Lamed-vav Tzadikim without even knowing itourselves.”8 The chance word, the kind look, the humorous gesture — whoknowswhatimpactourunsuspectingactionsmighthaveonsomeoneelse?Tzadireminds me: don’t take yourself for granted and don’t belittle yourself; be aTzadik!

SummaryforTzadi

Numericalvalue: 90

Meanings: Righteousness.

Application: BealerttothepresenceofTzadikiminourlives.

Reweaveourselvesintothefabricofcommunity.

Increaseourperformanceofmitzvot,gooddeedsandTzedakah,charity.

Shadow: Self-righteousness.

Beratingourselvesfornotlivinguptoanunrealisticallyhighstandard.

Reflection: WhoinmylifehaveIexperiencedtobeaTzadik?HowcanIbemoreTzadik-likemyself?

Suggestedaction: PerformananonymousactofTzedakahtoday.

CHAPTERNINETEEN

KUF

(koof)

SOUND:kNUMERICALVALUE:100

Meanings“Kadosh, kadosh, kadosh!” sings Isaiah. “Holy, holy, holy!”Kuf is a letter ofholiness. It begins the words kedushah, “holiness”; kiddush, “to make holy”;kaddish,“praiseofGod’sholiness”;and ,kadosh,“holy.”

One of the ancient ways of expressing holiness was through korban,“sacrifice.” ThisKuf-initiated word comes from the Hebrew root , karav,meaning“tocomeclose”or“drawnear.”OfferingsandsacrificeprovideawaytocomeclosertotheDivine.

Thebodyofteachingsabouthowtoexperienceandliveaholylifeiscalled, Kabbalah. Kabbalah comes from the root , kabal, “to receive” and

means“receiving.”Kufequalsonehundred,whichisanumberofcompletionandperfection,the

fulfillmentofacycle.Theword“holy” is related to“whole.”Whenacycle iscomplete,wholeness/holiness isfulfilled.Kuf iscentral to thewordshakaf,“to

go around,” and hakafa, “cycle.” In Jewish wedding ceremonies, the bridecircles the groom seven times. During the holiday of Simchat Torah, whichcelebrates the completion of one annual cycle of Torah readings and thebeginningofthenext,theTorahscrollitselfisprocessedinacirclearoundthesynagogue.Thesehakafot,circlings,havethepowertoelicitheightenedspiritualstates.

TheparadoxofKuf is that this letterofcompletionandwholeness is itselfbroken.Kuf is oneofonly two letters in theAlephBeit (Hei is theotherone)consistingoftwounattachedparts.It isalsotheonlyletterwhoseregularform(notfinal-letterform)descendsbelowthelineofwriting.

ApplicationKuf,asonehundred,markstheendofanoldcycleandthebeginningofanewone.Endingsalwaysinvolvesomesortofdeath.ThelegofKufdescendsbelowthelineofwritingintotheunderworld.Kuflivesinbothworlds.Itchallengesustomakepeacewithchange,tofindtheholiness,thewholeness,withinlossandnewbeginnings.

In several places in the Jewish liturgy,worshippers recitekaddish prayers,prayers of thanks for the Divine’s holiness. This prayer, as the Mourner’sKaddish, is recited daily during the first eleven months of mourning andthereafter on the yearly anniversary of the death. The kaddish, rather thanbemoaningloss,affirmsthegoodnessoftheHolyOne.Kuf,asthefirstletterofkaddish,callsus tosimilaraffirmationofwholeness in the faceofchangeandimpermanence.

Kuf is broken, composed of two separate parts. This suggests that ourholiness, ourwholeness, exists right in themidst of our brokenness ormaybeevenbecauseofit.Lifeisaseriesof lettings-go.Beingabletobothgrievethelosses and also joyously welcome the new is the challenge of holiness, thechallengeofKuf.

Korban, sacrifice, involves giving up something, letting something die, inorder to keep the cycle of life flowing. The Englishword “sacrifice” literallymeans“makesacred.”Kufcallsustomakesomeformofsacrifice,sometypeofoffering in acknowledgment of all that we take in the course of being alive.Whatarewewillingtoofferbacktothesourceoflife?InthedaysoftheTemplein Jerusalem, burnt animal offerings were given. Nowadays, animals are nolonger offered, but something stillmust be sacrificed. Such offerings can take

theformoffoodorwineorprayersorsongsorcreationsofourhandsorevenjustourtears.

Whilekorban,sacrifice,involveslettinggo,Kabbalahinvolvesreceivingorwelcoming in.Kuf signifies a timeof receptivity.The letter’sverybrokennesscanbeasigntoopenourheartsandmindstonewinspirationandteachings.

There are two traditional approaches to Kabbalah. In one, teachings arereceived froma teacher inadirect,person-to-person transmission. In theotherapproach, inspiration and insight flowdirectly to the student from theDivine.Kufcallsustoopentoinspirationfromhumanguidesand/ordirecttransmissionfromtheUnknowable.1

In the Unknowable, all ideas of holiness disappear. When the Chineseemperor asked Bodhidharma, the famous sage who brought Buddhism fromIndia to China, what was the highest teaching of Buddhism, Bodhidharmaanswered,“Vastemptiness,nothingholy.”

Theemperordidn’tunderstand,andhecontinued,“Whoareyou then?” Inotherwords,“Howcanyousaythere’snothingholy?Aren’tyouaholyman?”

Bodhidharmaresponded,“Idon’tknow.”Fundamentally, there is no holiness, just profound, complete not-

knowingness.Kuf calls us to the fundamental openness and receptivity of “Idon’t know.” With the “beginner’s mind” of not knowing, we are open tolearning.Without a lot of concepts and judgments and pronouncements about“holiness,”we can be natural and spontaneous.We can be like a “holy fool,”doingwhatneeds tobedonewithoutattachment tohow“good”or“notgood”weare.

We can be like Rabbi Moshe of Kobryn.When one of his disciples wasaskedwhatwasmostimportanttohisteacher,thestudentreplied,“Whateverhehappenedtobedoingatthemoment.”2

At the exact same time that all is vast emptiness with nothing holy,everythingisholy!RabbiAbrahamHeschelsaid,“Justtobeisablessing.Justtoliveisholy.”3

Rebbe Nachman advised, “Seek the sacred within the ordinary. Seek theremarkablewithinthecommonplace.”4

Kuf calls each of us to express the holiness that is not holiness and toremember:“Justtoliveisholy.”

Kuf’sShadow

Kuf’sShadowBecoming over-attached to an idea of “holiness” is one problematic aspect ofKuf. This can set up polarized, dichotomous thinking in which we deny themultifaceted and ambiguous nature of life in favor of some idealized purity.Often, this ideal involves a condemnationof thebodyor physical sideof life.Shame is the flipside of an out-of-balance concernwith holiness, shame overhavingabodyor sharingcommonhuman foibles and failings.Kuf takesus inhand, exhorting us to be holy, but reminding us of the brokenness withinwholeness.

Projecting our own insecurities and weaknesses onto others is anothercommonpitfallofthisletter.Inpatriarchaltraditions,forexample,responsibilityforthefallfromholinesshasbeenascribedtowomen.Inthiswayofthinking,womenareweakandsinfulandluremenawayfromholiness.It’sallEve’sfault,inotherwords.ThereceptivitythatKufdemandsincludesbeingopentotakingresponsibilityforourownthoughtsandactionsandnotblamingothers.

PersonalCommentsDid you ever hear the late Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach tell a story? He’d oftenbeginbyaddressinghisaudience,“Holybrothers,holysisters,listenasItellyouthe holiest of the holy.” The stories that followed were populated by holybeggars, holy husbands, holy wives, holy peddlers, holy rebbes, holy streetsweepers.Everybodywasholy!

Like aShlomo story, the letterKuf inspiresme to look for the holiness inthose I meet. Can my personal story be populated by holy bus drivers, holygrocery clerks, holy neighbors, holy colleagues, holy friends?Whether or notsuchaperspectiveispossibleisreallyuptome,holyRichard.

SummaryforKuf

Numericalvalue: 100

Meanings: Holiness.Completionandfulfillment.Sacrifice.

Application: Makepeacewithchangeandfindtheholiness,thewholeness,withinlossandnewbeginnings.

Dedicateatangibleofferingtothesourceoflife.

BeopenandalerttoreceiveinspirationandteachingsfromthehumanandtheDivine.

Dowhatneedstobedonewitha“don’tknow”mind.

Shadow: Shameandcondemnationofthebody.

Projectionofour“unholy”tendenciesontoothers.

Reflection: WhatformofgiftamIwillingtoofferbacktothesourceoflifeinacknowledgmentofallthatIhavetakeninthecourseofbeingalive?

Suggestedaction: Outdoors,insecret,offerapoem,apicture,asong,wine,food,orprayers,ortears,orsomeotherofferingtotheUnknowableasagift.Leaveitthereanddon’ttellorshowanybodywhatyouhavedone,anddon’tgobacktovisitthisspot.

CHAPTERTWENTY

RESH

(rehsh)

SOUND:rNUMERICALVALUE:200

Meanings,Resh,sharesthesameHebrewrootas ,rosh.Roshmeans“head”or

“beginning”or“new”asinRoshHashanah(literally“headoftheyear”).Reshpowersthewordsrefuah,“healing”;rachamim,“compassion”;andrav,“rabbi”or“teacher.”

Resh’s Hebrew root, , also means “poverty,” or a kind of spiritual ormoral emptiness, that is independent of how much money one has. In someKabbalisticteachings,Reshisassociatedwithroah,“badness,”andrasha,“todowrong.”

The letter Resh, therefore, is itself a rav, teaching us about healing andcompassionandalsodoingwrong.Let’sseehowwecanlearnResh’slessonsinthemostpositive,leastpainfulway.

Application

AnothernameforRoshHashanahisYomHazikaron,theDayofRemembrance.RoshHashanahinvolveslookingbackoverthepreviousyearandrememberingone’s actions, for better and worse. The Hebrew word for sin, cheit, literallymeans“missthemark.”Atthebeginningofthenewyear,werecallthosetimesinthepreviousyearwhenwemissedthemark,whenwedidnotliveuptoourideals.

Haveweindulgedinyetzerhara,“theevilimpulse”;lashonhara,“theeviltongue”;andayinhara,“theevileye”?Thesehabitsare insidious.Evenwhenwe’re earnestly trying to avoid them, before we know it, we’ve transgressedagain.Deliberatelyindulginginsuchdestructivehabitsleadstoakindofmoralresh,moralpoverty.

A new beginning is possible, though. The twenty-two letters of theAlephBeitareconsidered theprimordialbuildingblocksofcreation.Asoneof thesetwenty-two building blocks, Resh with its meaning as “new” shows that thepower of renewal is built into the very structure of existence. Ra’ananut,“freshness,” ispresentateverymoment. (Ra’ananutbeginswithResh,and theEnglishword“fresh”evenhasa“resh”init.)

While freshness is possible for each of us at every moment, the ten-dayperiod betweenRoshHashanah andYomKippur is especially designated as atimeofrenewalforallJews.RoshHashanahmarksatimeofintrospectionandteshuvah,“repentance”and“return.”

Repentance literally means “rethinking” or “thinking again.” As weremember, we repent. Teshuvah, repentance, is considered so basic andnecessary an underpinning of existence that the Talmud lists it as one of theseven forces that existed even before the creation of the universe. Withoutrepentance,theuniversecouldnotexist!

Afterrepentancecomesreturn.Individuallyandcollectively,wereturntotheintentiontoliveuptoourhighestidealsintheyeartocome.

When the letterResh appears in our hands, itmay be time for a personal,mini-RoshHashanah.Itisanopportunitytotakestockofouractionsandreturnagaintothecoreofwhoweare.Wedon’thavetowaituntilthefallappearanceoftheofficialholidayto“doteshuvah.”

“Returnagain,returnagain,returntothehomeofyoursoul.Returntowhoyouare,returntowhatyouare,returntowhereyouare,bornandrebornagain,”goesasongofResh.1Toreturnistoturnagain,tocomeback.Havewelostourwayinthisconfusingworld?Havewelostsightofwhoweareorwhowewanttobe?HavewelostasenseofconnectionwiththeDivine?TheletterReshcalls

tous,“Turnaround!Comeback!Returnagain!”Thewordravmeans“archer”aswellas“rabbi”or“teacher.”Ifcommitting

a cheit, a sin,means tomiss themark, thenResh is the rav, the archer, whoattemptstohitit.Reshurgesustoaimcarefully.Whenwehitthemark,refuah,healing,istheprize.

AnotherRoshHashanah tradition is thatof tashlich, “sendingaway.”Atastreamor lake or other body ofwater, people say prayers and cast crumbs orstones into the water that symbolize habits or actions or memories from thepreviousyearthattheywanttoletgoofandsendaway.

Reshcanbeanincentivetoperformourownversionof tashlich.Wedon’thavetowaituntilRoshHashanahtoceremoniallycastawayguiltorregrets,andstartafresh.

Reshcallsustodevelopour“innerrav,”ourinnerrabbiandteacher.Aswedothis,weembodymorefullythequalitiesofReshasheadandleader.Weleadourselves toward refuah, healing and wholeness, when, with rachamim,compassion,westrivetohitthemark.Withsuchaspirit,wemayfindourselvesnaturally becoming leaders of others. Resh encourages confidence in theseleadershipqualities.

Inwritingaboutthe“spiritualtraps”thatdeterpeoplefromtakingleadershipand“cutthenerveofcompassionateaction,”RobertAitkensays,“Iwouldaddonemoretrap:thatwedonotfeelconfidentofourselvesasmoversandshakers.We are conscious of our own limitations and neuroses, and we feel that byspeakingoutandactingwewillonlyimposeourproblemsontheworld.Well,therehavebeennoleaderswithoutlimitationsandneuroses,notone.Weareallhuman.Theproblemsareoutthereforustodealwithasweare.”2

“Leadon!”Reshurges.

Resh’sShadowItispossibletobecomefixatedonevil,projectingevilontoothersoridentifyingourselvesasexcessivelysinful.Reshdoesn’tshyawayfromnamingevil,butasthefirstletterofrachamim,compassion,itmaintainsaspiritofcompassionevenas it identifies what is sinful. If we veer into being judgmental and self-righteous,wehavemovedintoResh’sshadow.

Resh calls for compassion for ourselves aswell.Cheit, sin,meansmissingthemark,andeventhebestarcherdoesn’thitabullseyewitheveryshot.Most

important are the intention and willingness to do teshuvah and return to ourideals,nottoflagellateourselvesforourfailings.

Resh’sshadowcanleadustodenigratethebodyassinfulorviewemotionsasweakandshameful.Teshuvahmeansreturningtowholeness,whichincludesbodyandmindandemotion.Thisreturntowholenessisalsoknownasrefuah,healing.

Leadership is easily abused. Resh, as leader, can veer toward egotism,arrogance, and corruption. We must remain vigilant to guard against thesesometimessubtleandinsidioustendencies.

PersonalCommentsTheheadofReshisbentovertotheleft.Somecommentatorssaythisisasignofitshumility.Forme,itfeelsmorelikeshame.BeingJewish,Iamnostrangerto shame. As a child, even though my parents were kind and relativelynonjudgmental,Ifeltguiltyformanythings.IinternalizedaResh-likenegativejudgmentofmybodyanditsnaturalurgings.

As an adult, I feel ashamed of the tremendous damage I inflict on theenvironment through such modern habits as driving a car, flying in planes,consuming electricity and natural gas, buying things packed in plastic, etc. Ifsinning ismissing themark, sometimes I feel I am several hundredmiles offtargetinthewayIlivemylife.

Reshdoesn’t letmeoff thehookeasily. Itcallsmeto lookcarefullyatmylife.TobecomeawareofhowIcondoneandendorseourenslavementofwhatwecall“matter”forhumanconveniencewithoutgivingback.Ican’tescapethesituation,butatleast,withbendedneck,Icangrieveit.

SummaryforResh

Numericalvalue: 200

Meanings: Head.New.Poverty.

Application: Haveamini“RoshHashanah”bypracticingteshuvah,repentingof“missingthemark”andreturningtoourcorevalues.

Developingone’s“innerrabbi.”

Shadow: Beingjudgmentalandself-righteous.

Condemningourbodiesoremotionsassinful.

Abusingthepowerofleadership.

Reflection: Whataresomeareasofmylifeinneedofrefuah,healing?HowmightImovetowardgreaterhealthandwholenessintheseareas?

Suggestedaction: Doaformoftashlich,symbolicallycastingawaywhatyouwanttoletgoofbycastingcrumbsintowaterorwritingwhatyourepentofonscrapsofpaperandthenburningthem.

CHAPTERTWENTY-ONE

SHIN

(shihn)

SOUND:sORshNUMERICALVALUE:300

MeaningsShin is the letter of , esh, “fire.” Sefer Yetzirah, the Book of Creation,identifiesShinasoneofthethree“Motherletters”oftheAlephBeit,alongwithAleph,whichrepresentsair,andMem,whichstandsforwater. (ShincombineswithAlephtoformthewordesh,justasfirecombineswithairinordertoburn.)TheendsofShin’sthreeupraisedarmsresembletheflamesofafire,andShin’ssoundislikethehissingofaflame.TheHebrewwordforsun, ,shemesh,begins and endswithShin. Shin also sparks the fire and sun-relatedwords ofsh’viv,“spark”;shalhevet,“flame”;andsharav,“heat.”

Shininitiatestheprofoundword ,shalom.Shalom,whichisoneofthenames for God, conveys a host of meanings including: peace, wholeness,fullness,completion,soundness,safety,health,intactness,integrity,perfection.

Another name for God, , Shaddai, begins with Shin. Shaddai comesfromtheHebrewroots ,shad,“breast,”and ,dai,“enough.”God is thatwhichisenoughorhasenough.Godisthe“enoughness”

that pervades and feeds the universe. The milk from the breasts of theiranimalswastheverysustenanceof lifefor thesheep-herdingandgoat-herdingnomadic Hebrews. Shaddai, as a name for God, therefore represents ancient,primal,life-givingfeminineforce.

Shaddai,ormoreoftenjustitsfirstletter,Shin,appearsonthedoorpostsofJewishhomes throughout theworld, inscribedon theoutsideof themezzuzah,the small case that contains a piece of parchment with the “Shema Yisrael”prayer(Deu.6:4-9).Thiscentralprayer,whichJewsaretaughttoutterastheirfinalwordsbeforedeath,alsobeginswiththepowerfulMotherletter,Shin.

Shin’snameandthewordshanah,year(asinRoshHoshanah,“headoftheyear”)areboth related to theHebrewroot for“change,” ,shinah.Ayearcouldbedescribedasonecontinuousprocessofchange.Shinisitssymbol.

Punctuating theyeareverysevendays is ,Shabbat.Shabbat,whichbeginswithShin, is thedaysetaside in themidstofchangetoexperienceandcelebrate “enoughness.” On Shabbat we welcome into our lives the ,Shechinah,theSabbathQueen,thefeminineaspectofGod.

InfusingShalom,Shaddai,Shabbat,andShechinahwithitspowerfulenergy,ShinalsoinitiatesthathappiestofHebrewwords, ,simcha,joy.

ApplicationWhenShin lights itsway intoawareness, it’sanopportune time to feelgracedwith theblessingsofshalom.Shin reassuresus thatrightnow,at thismoment,wearesafe,thatalliswholeandcompleteandwell.Simchaisathand.

“Yeah,right,”thecynicalorskeptical,ormaybepractical,partofusthinks.“Theworld is full of terrible suffering, andmy life is not in such hot shape,either.Howcanyousayalliswell?”

Shinisnotaletteroffaciletheories.Itcontainstheprimalpoweroffire.Asoneofthethree“Mothers”oftheAlephBeit,Shinisoneofthebuildingblocksof the building blocks. It burns away superficialities and gets to the core ofexperience.Andatthecoreofexperience,wheneverythingelseisburnedawaybyShin’sholyfire,dwellsshalom.

Even in timesofdoubt,or sickness,orgrief,orwar,whenall seemsdark,Shinburnslikeanemberinanotherwisecoldfireplace.Firelivesinthatember,holdingthepotentialthatflamescansparkbacktolife,thatprofoundpeacecanblazeupandwarmourheartsonceagain.Ifweareexperiencinga“darknightofthesoul,”Shincarriesthepromisethatlightandwarmtharecloseathand.

Shin challenges us to feel— at least for a fewmoments— satisfied, notgraspingafteranythingelse,notfeelingthatifonlywehadthisorthat,thenwewould be happy.We are intact, whole right now, Shin teaches, with nothinglacking.Wehaveenough,nourishedbyShaddai,theSufficientOne.

WhenShin, the symbol of both change and peace, blazes itsway into ourlives,wearechallengedtofindshalom,wholeness,intactness,rightinthemidstof change. Everything is changing constantly, and yet at the center, there issomething that does not change. This point of shalom, this still point, is thesecretofShabbatandthesecretofShaddai,beingpeacefulandfeelingthatwhatwehave,atleastforthetimebeing,isenough.Thisisthekeytosimcha,joy.

A shanah, year, is marked by the changing seasons. Yet the thirteenth-centuryZenmasterWu-menwrote,“Thereisaspringthatdoesnotbelongtoyinand yang.”1He taught that we can experience a season that is not subject tocomingandgoing,tobirthanddeath,toyearlycyclesofchange.Itispossibletoenjoy the spring that does not belong to yin and yang right now, even asweshiverinthewinterrainorseektheshadeonahotsummerday.

Inscribedonthemezzuzahbythethreshold,thelocusofcomingandgoing,Shinstandsasareminderoftheplacewherethereisnocomingorgoing.Shinteachesthatchangeandpeaceshareacommonorigin.Aswemakepeacewithchange, find peace within change, then we actually experience the power ofShaddai.Itisenough.

NanaoSakakiwrites:

JustEnoughSoilforlegsAxeforhandsFlowersforeyesBirdforearsMushroomfornoseSmileformouthSongforlungsSweatforskin

Windformind2

ThisisShin’smessage:justenough.Theworldisofferingusjustenough.Justasweplaceourfootdown,thegroundmeetsit.Asthealarmclockrings,weroll

overandturnitoff.Asthebabycries,wepickherup.Whatelseisthere,afterall,butthis,ourchanging,changelesslife?

Shin,astheletteroffire,callsforheat,forpassion,forexcitement,forfun.Shin invites us to cultivate simcha, joy. Rebbe Nachman said, “Alwaysremember: joy is notmerely incidental to your spiritual quest. It is vital.”Healsosaid,“Findingtruejoyisthehardestofallspiritualtasks.Iftheonlywaytomakeyourselfhappyisbydoingsomethingsilly,doit.”3

Shin, thisprofound letterof changeandShabbat and shalom and fire, alsokindlessillinessandfun.Enjoy!Enjoy!

Shin’sShadowFireispowerful,withthepotentialtogetoutofcontrol.Shin’sflamesofpassioncan turn destructive. Anger, lust, and jealousy can burst into greatconflagrations. People can get burned. Instead of providing light andwarmth,Shincanburndownthehouse.

As always, balance is called for. The Hebrew word for heaven, ,shamayim,iscomposedoftheletteroffire,Shin,plusthewordforwater, ,mayim.Thewatertempersthefireandthefirewarmsthewater.Together,theycreate holy steam. To experience some of the simcha of shamayim, we mustaspire to thatmiddle placewherewater and fire coexist, eachmaintaining itspower without raging out of control into damaging floods or destructiveinfernos.

PersonalCommentsThere’s something ancient and evocative about a campfire at night under theopensky.Westareintotheever-changingflames,hearingtheircrackleandhiss,feelingtheirwarmth,smellingtherichwoodsmokeasitrisesup.Enhancedbythefire’smagic,storiesandsongsandlaughternaturallycomeforth.Itbecomeseasytoimagineourancestors,sharingtheirownstoriesandsongsandlaughteraroundsimilarfires,forhundredsandthousandsofyears.

There’ssomethingancientandevocativeabout the letterShin,also. It, too,sparksma’asiya, “story”; andshir, “song”; ands’hok, “laughter.”Like fire, it,too,isprimordialandpowerful.AsIgazeatitsshapeonthepage,imaginingitasblackfireonwhitefire,Shinfillsmewithasenseofawesomemystery.Inthe

worldofchange,ShinremindsmeofthepowerofShaddai,Enough,thepowerofthingsastheyare.

SummaryforShin

Numericalvalue: 300

Meanings: Fire.Shalom,peace,wholeness.Shaddai,enoughness.Change.Simcha,joy.

Application: Experienceshalomeveninthemidstofchange.

Practicefeelingsatisfied,filledwith“enough.”

Cultivatejoy.

Shadow: Consumingorbeingconsumedbyflamesofanger,lust,jealousy,etc.

Reflection: HowmightIincreasetheamountofjoyIexperienceinmylife?

Suggestedaction: Practicesimchabymaintainingahalf-smileonyourfaceatvarioustimesduringtheday.Observehowthishalf-smilemakesyoufeelandhowitaffectsyourinteractionswithothers.

CHAPTERTWENTY-TWO

TAV

(tahv)

SOUND:tNUMERICALVALUE:400

MeaningsTav, as the final letter of theAlephBeit, signifies endings and consummation.Like the English phrase “from A to Z,” the saying “from Aleph to Tav”expressescompleteness.Theword ,Tav,meansamark,seal, impression,orstamp.TavsealstheHebrewalphabet,leavingitsmarkoffulfillment.

There isnoendingwithoutanewbeginning,however.AccordingtoRabbiMichael Munk, “Kabbalistic literature teaches that the Aleph Beit —representing all divine forces — does not culminate with the Tav but turnsaroundtouniteagainwiththeAleph.”1

Similarly, Sefer Yetzirah, the Book of Creation, says, “Their end isembedded in their beginning and their beginning in their end.”2 Even as itrepresentstermination,Tavsuggeststhereismoretocome.Infact,inAramaic,the ancient cousin language toHebrew, thewordTavmeans “more,” “again,”“further.”Beyondwhatappears tobeanend, there isalwayssomethingmore.

The left foot ofTav protrudes out,moving forward (sinceHebrew reads fromrighttoleft)intothefuture.

Tav initiates tamid, the word for “always” or “forever.” The Aleph BeitbeginswithAleph and endswithTav, but the creativevibrationsof the letterscontinueonforever,alwaysfreshandnew.

SomeofthewordsinwhichAlephandTavuniteareespeciallyprofoundandimportant. For example, , emet, “truth,” is created whenAleph, the firstletter of the Aleph Beit, unites with Mem, a middle letter, and Tav, the last.Truth,theessentialfactofthings,pervadestheuniverse,“fromAlephtoTav.”

Many of the basic forms of Jewish observance begin with Tav such astefillah,“prayer”;tehillim,“psalms”;andteshuvah,“returning”or“repentance.”ThelastletteroftheAlephBeitisthefirstletterofthenamesofthebasictextsofJudaism, , Torah; , Talmud; and , Tanach, the twenty-fourbooksoftheOldTestament.

Tav initiates one of the most crucial terms in Kabbalistic practice, ,tikkun.Tikkunmeans“to repair”or“to redeem.”Rabbi IsaacLuria taught thattheultimate taskof eachperson is to contribute to themendingof a shattereduniverse,unifyingsparksofholinessthroughperceivingtheinherentsacrednessofallthings.Ifthisisourultimatetask,howappropriatethenthattheAlephBeitculminateswiththissignoftikkun,theletterTav.

ApplicationWhenTav, the“mark,”leavesitsmarkonus,acyclehascometoanend.Tavputsthesealonaprocessofcompletion.It’sover.

Such times can be bittersweet, like graduations or retirements. Or terriblysad, like divorces or deaths. Or fulfilling, like the completion of a large andsatisfying project. They can be joyful, as the end of one cycle marks thebeginningofanewone,asinweddingsandbirths.But,onewayoranother,forbetterorworse,Tavsignifiesculmination.

Astheletterofemet,truth,Tavcallsustoconfrontthetruthofthesituation,tofacethefacts.Tavmarksanaturaltimeforreflectionontheprocessthathasjustended.Someofthequestionsthisletterraisesare:

“WhathaveIlearnedfromthisexperience?”

“WhatblessingsdidIreceive?”

“WhatblessingsdidIgive?”

“WheredoIgofromhere?”

We have seen that Tav initiates tefillah, prayer. Prayers often arise duringperiods of ending, transition, and reflection — prayers of grief, prayers ofgratitude, prayers for guidance and direction. Tav may signify a time ofteshuvah,returningorrepentance,aswereturntoanawarenessofthesacredortoourselves,orrepentformistakesmade.

Endings and new beginnings provide excellent opportunities to commitourselves anew to tikkun, repair or rectification. Ever sinceRabbi Isaac Luriaemphasizedtheconceptmorethanfourhundredyearsago,tikkunhasassumedavital importance in Jewishmysticalpractice.RabbiLuria taught thatweupliftandredeemthefallensparksofholinessthatarehiddenin“husks”withineverything,bymeansofourprayers,ourdeepenedawareness,andouractsofloving-kindness.

I believe that for those of us living in the decades after the holocaust ofWorld War II, our impulse for tikkun is an attempt to somehow redeem themillionsofsoulswhoperishedintheconcentrationcampsandweremurderedinthetrenches.

Tavurgesustostrivefortikkuninourownlivesandinourownways.Howmightwedothat?ContemporaryRabbiDavidCooperwrites,“Ouropportunitiesto raise sparks are boundless. The choices we make for our activities, theinteractionswehavewithourfamily,friends,neighbors,businessassociates,andeven strangers, the way we spend our leisure time, the books we read, thetelevisionwewatch,thewaywerelatetofood,everythingindailylifepresentssparkslockedinhusksawaitingrelease.”3

As we release these sparks, we actually help prepare the way for thecomplete redemption of the world through the manifestation of Mashiachconsciousness.“TheappearanceoftheMessiahisnothingbuttheconsummationof the continuous process of restoration, of tikkun,” writes scholar GershomScholem. “The tikkun, thepath to the endof all things, is also thepath to thebeginning.”4

Tav,thisletterofendingandbeginning,oftikkunandTorah,ofprayersandteshuvah,makesabigimpression,indeed.Itcallsustoleaveourownmarksintheworld,throughourprayers,ourawareness,andouractsofloving-kindness.

Tav’sShadowSometimesweendasituationorrelationshipprematurelyinorder toavoidtherisksofdeeperintimacyorinvolvement.Hasthesituationhadachancetoreachitsresolution,itsnaturalculmination,orareweforcingatoo-earlyendoutofourown fears or doubts? It can be hard to know at times. (On the other hand,sometimes,becauseoffearsordoubts,weremain insituationsorrelationshipsbeyondahealthyendpoint,refusingtoletgo.)

Tavmarksaresolution,acompletion,aconsummation.Thiscantakemanyformsbeyondanobvious“ending.”WemustbecarefulnottointerpretTavtooliterallyorsimplistically.Afterall,it’sasmuchaletterofnewbeginningsasitisaletterofendings.

A danger in the concept of tikkun is the assumption that the world isinherentlyflawed,andthatit’suptoussomehowtorectifytheproblem.Thisisespecially pernicious when we apply it literally to another person. Whileopportunitiesfor“repair”areobviousallaroundus,inanothersense,theworldis complete just as it is.Excessive focus on the shatterednature of things candragusdownandburnusout.WaitingfortheMessiahtoappearcancauseustodisparagethispresentlife.Tav’schallengingtaskistoengageintikkunwithjoy,evenastearsofsorrowflowasweconfrontthebrokennessoftheworld.

PersonalCommentsEvenasitendstheAlephBeit,Tavkeepsmovingondowntheline,itsleftfootstepping out into the future. Tav reminds me of a song by the famous bluesmusicians Sonny Terry and Brownie McGhee: “Walk on, walk on, walk on,walk on. I’m gonna keep on walkin’ til I find my way back home.” Sturdy,intrepidTav walks on. Just as we do when one situation ends, and wemoveforwardintothenextincarnationofourlives.

SummaryforTav

Numericalvalue: 400

Meanings: Mark,seal,impression.Torah.Tefillah,prayer.Talmud.Tikkun,repairandredemption.

Application: Acknowledgeandreflectonthecompletionofaprocessorcycle.

Offerprayersofgrieforgratitude,orforguidance.

Commitoneselftostrivingfortikkun.

Shadow: Endingsituationsorrelationshipsprematurely.

Conversely,clingingtosituationsorrelationshipsbeyondahealthyendpoint.

Focusingexcessivelyonthe“broken”aspectsoflife.

Reflection: WhathaveIlearnedfromasignificantexperiencewhichrecentlycametoaclose?WhatblessingsdidIreceive?WhatblessingsdidIgive?WheredoIgofromhere?

Suggestedaction: Completeatangibleactoftikkuntoday.Whatcanyouuplift,repair,putright,orredeem?

CHAPTERTWENTY-THREE

TheMissingLetter

SOUND:?NUMERICALVALUE:?

MeaningsThe twenty-second letter, Tav, completes the Aleph Beit. Or does it? Athirteenth-centuryKabbalistictext,SeferHa-Temunah(TheBookoftheImage),teachesthatoneletterismissingfromthecurrentAlephBeit.Everydefectinourpresentworldstemsfromtheabsenceofthisletter.When,atsomepointinthefuture, this letter is revealed, then all the defectswill disappear. Thismissingconsonant,whosesoundisunimaginable,inconceivable,willthencombinewithall the other letters to create new words, new worlds. Finally, all will becomplete.

ATalmudiclegendtellsthatthistwenty-thirdletterappearedontheoriginalsetof tabletsuponwhich theTenUtteranceswere inscribed.When the tabletswere broken because the Israelites worshipped the golden calf, all the lettersflew off the tablets and ascended to Heaven. The other twenty-two letterseventuallyreturned,butthetwenty-thirdletterhadvanishedfromthisworld.1

SomeJewishmysticsspeculatethattheformofthisletterissimilartoaShinwithfourheadsinsteadofthree.Ontherightsideofthetefillin,thesmall,blackleather boxworn on the head duringmorning prayers, is embossed a regular,three-headed Shin. But on the left side, commemorating the missing letter, isembossedamysteriousfour-headedShin.

TheZohardescribesShinas“theletterofthefathers.”ThethreeprongsontheShinon the tefillin’s right side represent the three fathers,Abraham, Isaac,andJacob.2ThefourprongsontheShinonthetefillin’sleftsidesymbolizethe

fourmothers,Sarah,Rebecca,Rachel,andLeah.3Inthefuture,whenthemissingletter, theletteroftheleftside,isrevealed,

theworldwillbebalancedonceagain.Then,theletterofthemothers,lostforsolong,willcombinewithalltheotherletterstocreateauniverseofharmonyandpeace.

ApplicationThe twenty-third letter is a sign of promise, of yet unrealized potential. Eventhoughthefour-headedShinon the leftsideof the tefillinhintsat it,wereallydon’t knowwhat this letterwill look like, let alonewhat itwill sound like. Itrepresentstheundreamedof,theunimaginable,thepossible.

Whatmightlifebelikeinauniversewhereharmonyandwholenessactuallythrived?Where“theletterofthemothers”hadasmuchpresenceandsubstanceas“theletterofthefathers”?Whereeverydefecthaddisappeared?

SomesaythatthemissingletterwillappearonlywhentheMessiahappears.The revelation of the twenty-third letter will usher in the Messianic age, orconversely, the appearance of the Messiah will create the conditions for themissinglettertocomeintoawarenessonceagain.

Thewordfor“messiah”inHebrew, ,Mashiach,beginswithMem,theletterof thefemininepowersofwombandwater,andcontinueswithShin, theletter of the masculine power of fire. Similarly, the word for wholeness,harmony,completeness, ,shalom,combinestheenergyofShinandMem.

Likethetefillin,withtheletterofthefathersontherightsideandtheletterofthemothersontheleft,theMessianicagewillbemarkedbytheharmoniousblendingofthemasculineandthefeminine.Then,theShechinah,thefeminine,immanentaspectoftheDivine,willbeunitedwiththemasculine,transcendentaspect,andanewEdenwillflourish.

But what do we do in the meantime, just wait? Well, patience is indeedimportant. Choosing this letter can be a reminder to view things from a trulylong-rangeperspective,beyondthatofhumanlifetimes.

Atthesametime,however,weneednotbepassive.Wecanmakethebestofthe present even while praying and yearning and working for a better future.Rabbi Hillel asked, “If not now, when?” Can we experience wholeness andharmonyinthepresent?Theroadtothefuturetravelsthroughthisverymoment.CanweembodysomeofthequalitiesoftheMessianicagerightnow?

Oneofthem,forexample,ishumor.“Inthedeepestdepths,humorisalittlebitofthetasteofthecomingoftheMessiah.BecausewhentheMessiahcomes,ourmouthswillbefilledwithlaughter,”writesSusanYaelMesinai.4

Part of this humor is the cosmic laughter that comeswhenwe realizewehavenoideawhat’sgoingon!Evenaswe’refilledwithyearningfortheideal,perfectfuture,partofusseestheabsurdityofourplight.Ourignoranceofwhatthe twenty-third letter looks like or sounds like is just like our fundamentalignoranceabouteverything.

The tenth-century Zen teacher Ti-tsang asked thewanderingmonk Fa-yenwhere he was going. Fa-yen answered that he was on pilgrimage, goingwhereverhisfeetwillcarryhim.

Ti-tsangsaid,“Whatdoyouexpectfrompilgrimage?”Fa-yensaid,“Idon’tknow.”Ti-tsangthenreplied,“Ah,not-knowingismostintimate.”5Each of us is intimate with not-knowing. It’s the very heart of our

experience.Partofthemessageofthemissingletteristomakepeacewithnot-knowing,toacceptwithgoodhumorthisbasicignorance.

“I seenobodyon the road,”saidAlice.“Ionlywish Ihadsucheyes,” theKingremarkedinafretfultone.“TobeabletoseeNobody,andatsuchadistance,too!”6

When we choose this letter, we may feel like Alice in Wonderland. There’snobodytoseeonthiscard’sface.Thetwenty-thirdletteristheletterofdreams,of fairy tales, of an alternate reality. It calls us towalk forward into the nextcrazy adventure of life, not knowing what will come next or what strangecharacterswewillencounter.

Thismissingletteralsosignifiesthatsoundbeyondallsounds.Itrepresentsthelastword,thewordbeyondallwords.Whenchoosingthisletter,perhapsthebestresponseisjusttokeepquiet.Wordsandletterswillnevertrulydescribetheessenceoflife.

Rumisaid,

Ihavenomorewords.Letthesoulspeakwiththesilentarticulation

ofaface.7

ShadowOneshadowaspectofthetwenty-thirdletterisabandoningthepresentbecauseabetterworldsupposedlywaitsinthefuture.Theapocalypticfantasiesandevenlonging for world destruction on the part of many fundamentalist groupsrepresent an extreme version of this future-oriented view that disparages thisworld,thisearth,thismoment.

Theattitudethatabetterworldwaitsinthefuturemaybeexpressedthroughapathy or despair about the present, giving up on life, or acting self-destructively.Themissingletterpromisesabetterfuture,butthatdoesn’tmeanweshouldmalignthepresent.It’sallwehave.

PersonalCommentsWhen I ponder thismissing letter I feel a deep, aching longing. I yearn and Iyearn,andI’mnotsurewhatexactlyI’myearningfor.Thedreamofwholeness,maybe,thehopeofpeace,ofjoy?Aplacewherepeopleandanimalsandbirdsandfishandallthebeingsoftheearthareabletoliveinbalanceandfulfillmentaccordingtotheirnatures?

Thetwenty-thirdletteristheemblemofourdeepestdesires.Itsmysterious,unknown shape and form receives and holds our hopes and dreams andaspirations. The missing letter carries the promise that somehow, someday,shalom,wholeness,willfilltheuniverse.

SummaryfortheMissingLetterThereisnosummaryforthemissingletter.Howcanonesummarizeamystery?Themissingletteristheletterofthefuture,theletteroftheunknown,theletterofallsounds,theletterofsilence.

NOTES

Preface1. Abraham Abulafia, quoted in Gershom Scholem,Major Trends in Jewish Mysticism (New York:

SchockenBooks,1974),p.134.

Introduction1. MarciaPrager,ThePathofBlessing(NewYork:BellTower,1998),p.191.2. DavidAbram,TheSpelloftheSensuous(NewYork:VintageBooks,1997),p.245.3. HarrySperlingandMauriceSimon,trans.,TheZohar,vol.2(London:SoncinoPress,1978),p.111.4. DanielMatt,trans.,TheZohar:TheBookofEnlightenment(NewYork:PaulistPress,1983),p.120.5. JiriLanger,NineGatestotheHasidicMysteries(NewYork:DavidMcKayCompany,1961),p.16.6. BaalShemTov,quotedinPrager,ThePathofBlessing,p.192.7. Abram,TheSpelloftheSensuous,p.242.8. Ibid,p.243.9. StephenMitchell,trans.,Genesis(NewYork:HarperCollins,1996),p.xiv.10. Deuteronomy18:10-13.11. SeeExodus28:15-30.12. EncyclopaediaJudaica,Vol.6(Jerusalem:KeterPublishing,1996),p.117.13. AbrahamAbulafia,LifeoftheFutureWorld,1280,quotedinJohnMatthews,ed.,TheWorldAtlasof

Divination(Boston,Toronto&NewYork:Little,BrownandCompany,1992),p.74.14. QuotedinEdwardHoffman,TheHeavenlyLadder(EastMeadow,NY:FourWorldsPress,1985),p.

120.15. Isaiah7:11.16. For suggestions regarding consulting oracles see Dianne Skafte, Listening to the Oracle

(HarperSanFrancisco,1997),p.32.17.17. PerleEpstein,Kaballah:TheWayoftheJewishMystic(Boston:Shambhala,1988),pp.98-99.18. AbrahamAbulafia,quotedinHoffman,TheHeavenlyLadder,p.125.19. AbrahamJoshuaHeschel,TheQuestforGod(NewYork:CharlesScribner’sSons,1954),p.xii.

Chapter1:Aleph1. InmodernHebrew,whenavowelsymbolisplacedbelowAleph,onepronouncesthatvowelsound.2. AryehKaplan,MeditationandKabbalah(YorkBeach,Maine:SamuelWeiser,1982),p.299.3. Genesis1:2.4. MartinBuber,TalesoftheHasidim:EarlyMasters(NewYork:SchockenBooks,1947),p.199.5. RabbiYerachmielBenYisrael,quotedinRamiM.Shapiro,ed.andtrans.,OpenSecrets:TheLettersof

RebYerachmielBenYisrael(NorthCarolina:HumanKindnessFoundation,1994),p.5.6. Ibid,p.28.7. Proverbs14:4.8. Y-H-V-Hrefersto Yud-Hei-Vav-Hei.ThisistheunpronounceableNameofGodoftentranslated

as“Adonai”or“Lord.”9. Genesis1:6.10. Zohar3:75a.11. Genesis28:12-15.12. Genesis28:16-17.

Chapter2:Beit1. Isaiah56:7.2. RobertAitken,ThePracticeofPerfection(NewYorkandSanFrancisco:Pantheon,1994),p.64.3. Hakuin Zenji, Chant in Praise of Zazen, quoted in Robert Aitken, Taking the Path of Zen (San

Francisco:NorthPointPress,1982),p.113.4. Naomi Shihab Nye,Words Under theWords: Selected Poems (Portland, Oregon: EighthMountain

Press,1994),p.42.

Chapter3:Gimmel1. RobertBly,LovingaWomaninTwoWorlds(GardenCity,NY:DialBooks,1985).2. PirkeiAvot1:2.3. Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach, quoted in Peninnah Schram, ed., Chosen Tales: Stories Told by Jewish

Storytellers(Northvale,NJ:JasonAronson,1995),pp.70-75.

Chapter4:Dalet1. MartinPrechtel,SecretsoftheTalkingJaguar(NewYork:Tarcher/Putnam,1998),p.276.2. ArthurGreen andBarryHoltz, eds. and trans.,YourWord is Fire (Woodstock,VT: JewishLights,

1993),p.51.3. MartinBuber,TalesoftheHasidim,EarlyMasters(NewYork:SchockenBooks,1947),p.64.4. RebbeNachmanofBreslav,quotedinMosheMykoff,ed.,TheEmptyChair(Woodstock,VT:Jewish

Lights,1994),p.41,104.

Chapter5:Hei1. NachmanofBreslov,quotedinMykoff,ed.,TheEmptyChair,p.14.2. SimoneWeil,WaitingforGod(NewYork:G.P.Putnam’sSons,1951),p.105.3. Exodus3:2-4.4. IKings19:11-12.

Chapter6:Vav1. Scholem,MajorTrendsinJewishMysticism,p.275.

Chapter7:Zayin1. Exodus20:8.2. GenesisRabba10:9.3. AbrahamJoshuaHeschel,TheSabbath(NewYork:Farrar,StrausandGiroux,1979),p.19.4. DeuteronomyRabba,3,1.5. RobertBly,IronJohn(NewYork:Addison-WesleyPublishingCompany,1990),p.4.

Chapter8:Chet1. Job26:7.2. MartinBuber,TalesoftheHasidim,LaterMasters(NewYork:SchockenBooks,1948),p.92.3. Wu-men,quotedinAitken,TakingthePathofZen,p.96.4. GarySnyder,TurtleIsland(NewYork:NewDirections,1974),p.68.5. AryehKaplan,InnerSpace(Brooklyn,NY:MoznaimPublishingCo.,1990),p.167.

Chapter9:Tet1. Genesis1:4.2. Exodus4:2-4.3. Numbers21:6-9.4. Buber,TalesoftheHasidim,EarlyMasters,p.237-238.5. Psalms23:4.6. Psalms23:67. FrancescoPatricolo,“CometheEvolution”onBop-A-Ganda(Portland,OR:WillowSap,1997).

Chapter10:Yud1. EdwardHoffman,TheHebrewAlphabet:AMysticalJourney(SanFrancisco:ChronicleBooks,1998),

p.47.2. Numbers12:3.3. Deuteronomy7:7.4. Eruvin13b;ZoharII232.5. Micah6:8.6. JelaluddinRumi,TheEssentialRumi,trans.ColemanBarks(HarperSan-Francisco,1995),p.279.

Chapter11:Kaf1. WilliamStafford,StoriesthatCouldBeTrue(NewYorkCity:HarperandRow,1977),p.4.

Chapter12:Lamed1. Buber,TalesoftheHasidim,EarlyMasters,p.313.2. Rumi,IlluminatedRumi,p.81.3. DanMillman,TheWayofthePeacefulWarrior(Tiburon,CA:H.J.KramerInc.,1980),p.133.

4. FrederickBuechner,WishfulThinking:ATheologicalABC(NewYork.Harper&Row,1973),p.95.

Chapter13:Mem1. Exodus34:6-7.2. Isaiah11:9.3. MartinPrechtel,“GriefandPraise:anEveningwithMartinPrechtel”(Minneapolis,MN:HiddenWine

Productions,1997)4. RebbeNachmanofBreslav,quotedinMykoff,ed.,TheEmptyChair,p.89.5. MichaelMeade,MenandtheWaterofLife(HarperSanFrancisco,1993),p.344.6. AryehHirschfield,WingsofPeace(1990).

Chapter14:Nun1. Genesis1:22.2. RobertLouisStevenson,Fables(NewYork,1896).

Chapter15:Samech1. Psalms91:4.2. SongofSongs3:8.3. MartinLutherKing,“LetterfromaBirminghamJail.”4. NakagawaRoshi,quotedinAitken,TakingthePathofZen,p.74.5. JohannWolfgangvonGoethe,“TheHolyLonging,” trans.RobertBly, inBly,Hillman,andMeade,

eds.,TheRagandBoneShopoftheHeart(NewYork:HarperCollins,1992),p.382.6. WaltWhitman,“SongofMyself”(1855).

Chapter16:Ayin1. Ayinisasilentletter,butinmodernHebrewwhenavowelsymbolisplacedbyayin,onepronounces

thatvowelsound.2. Proverbs29:18.3. Numbers11:24-25.4. MatsuoBashōinRobertAitken,AZenWave(NewYork:Weatherhill,1978),p.74.5. RebbeNachman,quotedinMykoff,ed.,TheEmptyChair,p.58.6. Aitken,TakingthePathofZen,p.95-96.7. MeisterEckhart,quotedinStephenMitchell,ed.,TheEnlightenedMind(NewYork:HarperPerennial,

1991),p.114.8. Isaiah52:8.9. Psalms119:18.10. Joel2:28.11. Proverbs27:20.

Chapter17:Peh

1. Numbers12:8.2. Exodus4:10-16.3. Proverbs16:23.4. Proverbs15:23.5. WalpolaRahula,WhattheBuddhaTaught(NewYork:GrovePress,1959),p.47.6. Buber,TalesoftheHasidim,LaterMasters,p.229.7. Matthew15:11.8. RobertAitken,EncouragingWords(NewYorkandSanFrancisco:PantheonBooks,1993),p.125.9. Psalms51:1710. Beitzah16a;Rashi.11. Hil.Teshuvah2:4.12. Psalms19:14.13. Ecclesiastes5:3.

Chapter18:Tzadi1. Proverbs10:25.2. DavidCooper,GodisaVerb(NewYork:RiverheadBooks,1997),p.123,125.3. ArthurWaskow,Godwrestling—Round2(Woodstock,VT:JewishLights,1996),p.212.4. Cooper,GodisaVerb,p.242.5. Ibid,p.125.6. BabaBathra10b.7. Aitken,ThePracticeofPerfection,p.10.8. Cooper,GodisaVerb,p.125.

Chapter19:Kuf1. See Cooper,God is a Verb, p. 11-12, for a concise description of the two traditional schools of

Kabbalah.2. Buber,TalesoftheHasidim,LaterMasters,p.173.3. Rabbi Abraham Heschel, quoted in Elias Amidon and Elizabeth Roberts, eds., Earth Prayers

(HarperSanFrancisco,1991),p.365.4. RebbeNachman,quotedinMykoff,ed.,TheEmptyChair,p.59.

Chapter20:Resh1. RaphaelKahn“ReturnAgain,”MusicbyShlomoCarlebach.2. Robert Aitken, The Diamond Sangha Newsletter (Honolulu, Hawaii: Koko An Zendo, November

1989),p.1.

Chapter21:Shin1. RobertAitken,TheGatelessBarrier(SanFrancisco:NorthPointPress,1991),p.142.2. NanaoSakaki,BreaktheMirror(SanFrancisco:NorthPointPress,1987),p.89.3.

3. RebbeNachman,quotedinMykoff,ed.,TheEmptyChair,p.99,101.

Chapter22:Tav1. MichaelMunk,TheWisdomintheHebrewAlphabet(Brooklyn,NY:MesorahPublications,1997),p.

222.2. SeferYetzirah.1:7.3. Cooper,GodisaVerb,p.29.4. Scholem,MajorTrendsinJewishMysticism,p.274.

Chapter23:TheMissingLetter1. LevushHaTecheles32:43;Pesachim87b.2. Zohar1:2b.3. Levush,OrachChaim32:43.4. ShlomoCarlebachandSusanYaelMesinai,Shlomo’sStories(Northvale,NJ:JasonAronson,1994).5. ThomasCleary,trans.,BookofSerenity(Hudson,NY:LindisfarnePress,1990),p.86.6. Carroll,Alice’sAdventures,p.239.7. Jalalal-DinRumi,IlluminatedRumi,p.128.

GLOSSARY

Abulafia,Abraham(1240-1296):SpanishKabbalistwhodevelopedmethodsofmeditatingon and combining the letters of theDivineName inorder to reachecstaticstates.

Adonai:AnameofGod,usuallytranslatedinEnglishas“Lord,”thatisusedasa substitute for theunpronounceable four-letterName (YHVH).Spelledand

Aleph Beit: The Hebrew alphabet, from the names of the first two letters.Alternativelyspelled/pronouncedas“Alef,”“Beth,”“Bayt,”“Bet,”and“Beis.”

Amidah: The prayer consisting of nineteen blessings that is the core of allJewishprayerservicesandthatonereciteswhilestanding.

Aramaic:AncientSemiticlanguagecloselyrelatedtoHebrew.

Aseret ha’Dibrot: Literally, “the Ten Sayings” or “the Ten Utterances.”Hebrewphrase used inTorah to describewhat are commonly called the “TenCommandments.”

BaalShemTov:Literally“MasteroftheGoodName.”ThetitleofRabbiIsraelbenEliezer(1698-1760),thefounderofHasidism.

Bracha:Blessing.

Chesed:Loving-kindness,grace.OneofthetenSefirot.

Chupah:CanopyunderwhichtheJewishweddingceremonytakesplace.

Chutzpah:Yiddishfornerve,gumption,audacity.

Einsof:Literally,“withoutend”or“withoutbound.”Theultimate,unknowable

aspectofGod.

Gematria: A system of Jewish mysticism used to gain insight into hiddenmeanings of the Torah inwhich one calculates the numerical value of letters,words,andphrases,andthenlinksthoseletters,words,andphraseswithothersofthesamevalue.

G’milutchasadim:Actsofloving-kindness.

Golem: Literally, “shapeless mass.” A legendary creature made of clay andanimatedbymagicalincantationsthroughthelettersoftheDivineName.

Ha-shem:Literally,“theName.”RespectfuleuphemismusedasasubstitutefornamingGod.

Hasidism: Mystical movement founded in Poland and the Ukraine in theeighteenthcenturybytheBaalShemTov.

Havdalah:Literally,“todistinguish”or“toseparate.”TheceremonyatduskonSaturdaynightthatmarksaseparationbetweenShabbatandthenewweekjustbeginning.

Kabbalah:Literally,“receiving.”TheJewishmysticaltradition.

Kavanah:Intention.Meditationorconcentrationpriortoprayerorperformanceofaholyact.

Koan(Japanese):Literally,“case”(asacourtcase).Anexpressionofharmonyoftherelativeandtheabsolute.Athemeofmeditationtobemadeclear.

Lamed-Vav Tzadikim or Lamed-Vavniks: The thirty-six hidden righteousoneswhosustaintheworldthroughtheirmerit.

Lashonhara:Literally,“theeviltongue.”Gossip,criticism,andotherkindsofharmfulspeech.

Luria, Isaac (1534-1572): Influential Kabbalistic rabbi of Safed, Israel, alsoknownas“theAri,”theLion.

Maggid:Apreacher, teacher,healerandstorytellerwhosometimes travelledacircuit.

Mashiach:TheMessiah.

Matzah:UnleavenedbreadeatenduringPassover.

Mezzuzah:SmallcasecontainingapieceofparchmentwiththeShemaprayerthatisattachedtothedoorpostsofhousesofJews.

Midrash: Commentary or extension of Torah, part of the Talmud. Post-TalmudicJewishlegendsingeneral.

Mikveh: A natural body of water or a specially constructed bath used forceremoniesofpurification.

Minyan:Quorumoftenadultsrequiredforcertainceremoniesorprayers.Manycongregations require tenmen to formaminyan,whereasother Jewishgroupscountbothmenandwomenaspartoftheminyan.

Niggunim:Wordlessdivinemelodies.

Omer:Thecountingof the fiftydays from the secondnightofPassoveruntilShavuot.

Ot:“Letter,”“sign,”or“miracle.”

ReborRev:Anhonorifictermusedtoaddressapersonwhoisascholarorafellowstudentordisciple.

Rebbe:Yiddishformof“rabbi”usedaffectionatelytorefertoHasidicmasters.

RoshChodesh:Newmoon. The beginning of theHebrewmonth,marked byspecialprayersandcelebration.

RoshHashanah:Literally,“HeadoftheYear.”TheJewishNewYear.

Seder:RitualPassovermeal.

Sefer:Book.

Sefer Yetzirah: “The Book of Creation.” Earliest known Kabbalistic text,attributedtoRabbiAkiva(2ndcenturyC.E.),whichdescribeshowGodcreatedtheuniversebymeansofthetwenty-twoHebrewlettersandthetenSefirot.

Sefirot:The tendivine emanationsor energies throughwhich theworld cameintobeing.TenbranchesorcontainersontheTreeofLife,representingaspectsandattributesoftheDivine.

Shabbos/Shabbat: Sabbath. The period from sunset Friday night to duskSaturdaynight,setasideasatimeofrest,renewal,spirituality,andcelebration.

Shavuot:ThefestivalthattakesplacesevenweeksafterPassoverandcelebratesthetransmissionofTorahonMt.Sinai.

Shechinah: The immanent (as opposed to transcendent), feminine aspect ofDivinity.AlsoreferredtoastheSabbathQueen.

Shema: The central prayer of Judaism, from Deuteronomy 6:4-9, “Hear OIsrael,YHVHisourGod,YHVHisOne.”

Shmitah:Theseventh,sabbaticalyear,duringwhichthelandisnotworked.

Shofar: The ram’s horn that is ritually blown at Rosh Hashanah and YomKippur.

SimchatTorah:ThelastdayoftheharvestfestivalofSukkot,duringwhichtheyearlycycleofreadingfromtheTorahisconcludedandthenbegunagain.

Sufi: Mystical branch of Islam, emphasizing ecstatic communion with theDivinethroughdancingandmeditation.

Sukkot:TheharvestfestivalbeginningonthefullmoonafterRoshHashanah.

Sutra (Sanskrit): A discourse or sermon, usually attributed to the Buddha.Buddhistscripturesingeneral.

Talmud: The collection of rabbinic stories, laws, and teachings written andcompiled between 200 B.C.E. and 500 C.E. There are two Talmuds: the

Jerusalem Talmud and the Babylonian Talmud. The Talmud interprets Torahand encodes in greater detail the laws that the Torah is supposed to embody.AftertheTorah,theTalmudisthemostsacredJewishtext.

Tanach:TheBible.AnacronymcombiningtheinitialsofTorah(thefivebooksofMoses),Neviim(Prophets),andKetuvim(Writings).

Tefillin: Phylacteries consisting of two black leather boxes containing Bibleversesthatarewornontheleftarmandtheforeheadduringmorningprayers.

Teshuvah:Literally,“return.”Repentanceorreturning.

Tikkun:Literally,“repair.”Restorationandredemption,especially,astaughtbyIsaacLuria,throughtheraisingofsparksoftheDivine.

Tikkunolam:Repairoftheworld.

Torah: The first five books of the Bible. By extension, the whole of Jewishtraditionandteaching.

Tzadik: A righteous person, someone known for deep faith and goodness.HasidimconsidertheirrebbestobeTzadikim,possessinggreatspiritualpowers.

UrimandThummim:Theoracular“breastplateofjudgment”wornbytheHighPriestintheTemple.

Yetzerhara:Theevilimpulseorinclination.Evilspirit.

YHVH: ,Yud-Hei-Vav-Hei,theineffableandunpronounceable,mostholyfour-letterNameofGod,sometimesreferredtoas“theTetragrammaton.”

YomKippur:TheDayofJudgment,ortheDayofAtonement.Theholiestdayof the Jewish year, ten days after Rosh Hashanah, during which the Holyinscribes peoples’ names in the Book of Life for the coming year, thusdeterminingtheirfates.

Zohar: “The Book of Splendor.” Seminal Kabbalistic text compiled frommysticaloraltraditionsbyMoshedeLeoninSpaininthethirteenthcentury.

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JasonAronson,1995.Glazerson, Matityahu. Building Blocks of the Soul: Studies on the Letters and Words of the HebrewLanguage.Northvale,NJ:JasonAronson,1997.

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Haralick,RobertM.TheInnerMeaningoftheHebrewLetters.Northvale,NJ:JasonAronson,1995.Hoffman,Edward.TheHeavenly Ladder:Kabbalistic Techniques for InnerGrowth. EastMeadow,NY:

FourWorldsPress,1985.Hoffman,Edward.TheHebrewAlphabet:AMysticalJourney.SanFrancisco:ChronicleBooks,1998.Kaplan,Aryeh.SeferYetzirah:TheBookofCreation.YorkBeach,ME:SamuelWeiser,1993.Kushner,Lawrence.TheBookofLetters:AMysticalAlef-bait.Woodstock,VT:JewishLights,1990.Munk,Michael.TheWisdomintheHebrewAlphabet:TheSacredLettersasaGuidetoJewishDeedandThought.Brooklyn,NY:MesorahPublications,1997.

Pennick,Nigel.TheSecretLoreofRunesandOtherAncientAlphabets.London:Rider,1991.Prager,Marcia.ThePathofBlessing.NewYork:BellTower,1998.Ruskin,Aaron.LettersofLight:AMysticalJourneyThroughtheHebrewAlphabet.Brooklyn,NY:Sichos

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____________.TalesoftheHasidim,LaterMasters.NewYork:SchockenBooks,1948.Carlebach,Shlomo,andSusanYaelMesinai.Shlomo’sStories.Northvale,NJ:JasonAronson,1994.Cooper,David.GodisaVerb.NewYork:RiverheadBooks,1997.EncyclopaediaJudaica.Jerusalem:KeterPublishing,1996.Epstein,Perle.Kaballah:TheWayoftheJewishMystic.Boston:Shambhala,1988.Green,ArthurandBarryHoltz,eds.andtrans.YourWordisFire:TheHasidicMastersonContemplativePrayer.Woodstock,VT:JewishLights,1993.

Heschel,AbrahamJoshua.TheQuestforGod.NewYork:CharlesScribner’sSons,1954.____________.TheSabbath.NewYork:Farrar,StrausandGiroux,1979.Kamenetz,Rodger.TheJewintheLotus.HarperSanFrancisco,1994.____________.Stalking Elijah: Adventureswith Today’s JewishMysticalMasters. HarperSanFrancisco,

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PERMISSIONS

Gratefulacknowledgmentsto:

JasonAronson,Inc.forthepermissiontoreprintfromthefollowingthreeworks:NineGatestotheHasidicMysteriesbyJiriLanger(JasonAronson,Inc.,Northvale,NJ,1993);ChosenTales:StoriesToldbyJewishStorytellers. (JasonAronson, Inc.,Northvale,NJ,1995)editedbyPeninnahSchram;Shlomo’sStoriesbyShlomoCarlebachandSusanYaelMesinai(JasonAronson,Inc.,Northvale,NJ,1994).

JewishLightsPublishing for thepermission to reprint from the following twoworks:TheEmptyChair:FindingHope and Joy— TimelessWisdom from aHasidicMaster, Rebbe Nachman of Breslov by theBreslovResearchInstitute(JewishLightsPublishing,1994);YourWordisFire:TheHasidicMastersonContemplativePrayerbyArthurGreenandBarryW.Holtz(JewishLightsPublishing,1993).

ThresholdBooksforthepermissiontoreprintfromTheEssentialRumitranslatedbyColemanBarks.(SanFrancisco:HarperSanFrancisco.ThresholdBooks1995).

BroadwayBooksforthepermissiontoreprintfromTheIlluminatedRumibyColemanBarksandMichaelGreen.(BroadwayBooks,adivisionofRandomHouse,Inc.,1997).

GeorgesBorchardt,Inc.forthepermissiontoreprintfromLovingaWomaninTwoWorldsbyRobertBly.(GeorgesBorchardt,Inc.,1985).

PutnamBerkeleyforthepermissiontoreprintfromGodisaVerbbyDavidCooper.(PutnamBerkeley,adivisionofPenguinPutnamInc.,1997).

Farrar, Straus and Giroux, LLC. for the permission to reprint from The Sabbath by Abraham JoshuaHeschel.(Farrar,StrausandGiroux,LLC.,1951,1979).

TRO-Hollis Music Inc., for the permission to reprint from “Walk On” by Brownie McGhee and RuthMcGhee.(TRO-HollisMusicInc.,NewYork,1962,1966).

Far Corner Books for the permission to reprint from “Kindness” inWords Under the Words: SelectedPoemsbyNaomiShihabNye.(FarCornerBooks,1995).

NewDirectionsPublishingCorp for thepermission to reprint fromTurtle Island byGarySnyder. (NewDirectionsPublishingCorp,1974).

GraywolfPressforthepermissiontoreprintfrom“AStorythatCouldbeTrue.”TheWayit is:NewandSelectedPoemsbytheEstateofWilliamStafford.(GraywolfPress,St.Paul,MN,1977,1998).

AZenWavebyRobertAitken.NewYork:Weatherhill.Copyright©1978.Reprintedwithpermission.

WingsofPeacebyAryehHirschfield.Copyright©1990byAryehHirschfield.Reprintedwithpermission.

“Come the Evolution” on Bop-A-Ganda by Francesco Partricolo. Copyright © 1997 by Francesco

Patricolo.Reprintedwithpermission.

BreaktheMirrorbyNanaoSakaki.Nobleboro,Maine:BlackberryPress,1987.Reprintedwithpermission.

RICHARD SEIDMAN is a long-time student of Jewish mysticism, ZenBuddhism and indigenous traditions. He is a a children’s book author andscreenwriter,andapersonalandbusinesscoach.In1989,hefoundedFriendsofTrees, a nonprofit tree-planting organization in Portland, Oregon that is stillthriving. He is also a former teacher of the deaf, and holds a black belt inShotokanKarate.HelivesinAshland,Oregon.

RABBIRAMISHAPIRO is anaward–winningauthorofover thirtybooksonreligion and spirituality. He received rabbinical ordination from the HebrewUnion College–Jewish Institute of Religion, and holds a Ph.D. from UnionGraduateSchool.Acongregationalrabbifor20years,RabbiRamicurrentlyco–directs One River Wisdom School (oneriverwisdomschool.com), blogs atwww.spirituallyindependnet.org,andwritesaregularcolumnforSpirituality&Health magazine called “Roadside Assistance for the Spiritual Traveler.” Hisnewestbook isEmbracing theDivineFeminine:TheSongofSongsAnnotatedand Explained (SkyLight Paths). Rami can be reached via his website,rabbirami.com.

SHOSHANNAH BROMBACHER studied ancient Near Eastern studies andcodicologyinLeyden,HollandandearnedaPh.D.specializinginthemedievalHebrewpoetryoftheAmsterdamSephardic-Portuguesecommunity.ShestudiedinJerusalemandlecturedinBerlinandNewYork.Shoshannahhaspaintedfroman early age, inspired by Chassidic stories and Chagall works on her father’sbookshelves.Sheattendedclassesatanartacademy,butconsidersherselfself-taught.ShelivesinBrooklyn,NewYork.