A COMPARATIVE STUDY OF LITERARY TRANSLATIONS OF THE OLD …

INTERNATIONAL BULLETIN OF LITERATURE AND LINGUISTICS

Vol. 3 No. 4 (December) 2020

Pages: 46-56

Published by: Research Syndicate Email: [email protected] Website: http://www.researchsyndicate.com.pk

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A COMPARATIVE STUDY OF LITERARY TRANSLATIONS OF THE

OLD MAN AND THE SEA

1. Anila Tariq, University of Central Punjab

2. Dr. Khalid Ahmed, University of Central Punjab

3. Mr. Asad Habib, University of Central Punjab

ABSTRACT

Literary translation has a long history. This paper is an endeavour to analyse and

compare the literary translations of the famous novel ‘The Old Man and the Sea’ by Ernest

Hemingway. There is need to probe different strategies adopted by translators to translate this

masterpiece into Urdu. Two translations of the novel are selected for analysis; one of them is

translated into Urdu by Shaid Hameed and other by Rana M. Younas Shukeeb. This project

has attempted to investigate the culture and style difference between the original text and the

target texts. Christinae Nord’s model has been employed to analyse both of the translated texts.

And the analysis has shown that Shukeeb’s translation is better as compared to the other one.

Key Words: literary, masterpiece, endeavour, probe,

Introduction

My purpose of writing this comparative analysis of the translation of the novel “Old

man and the sea” is to think critically and theoretically about translation, as it will also

enhance my practical translation skills. However, I do not have much knowledge about

translating literature, so in order to learn more, I have decided to write a project to achieve

this. I admit that I was very inspired by “The old man and the sea” novel when I was in my

final semester of graduation. The story tells the battle between an aging, experienced

fisherman, Santiago, and a large marlin. The story opens with Santiago having gone 84 days

without catching a fish, and now being seen as “salao”, the worst from unluckiness. So for

this purpose I purchased two books of literal translation of the novel, one translation is by

Rana M.Younas Shukeeb, and the other one is by Shahid Hameed. After an analytical study

of both books, I came to know that the book of Rana M.younas Shkeeb is more appealing for

the graduate students rather than the other one. So, this became the starting point for my

project.



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Problem Statement

The problem statement that I will be working with is as follows:

. What is literary translation?

. With what strategies have the old man and the sea been translated by Shahid

Hameed?

. What is the difference between the two translations?

. How can the translations be improved?

Literary Translation

Definition of literary Translation

Translation of literature is fundamentally different from other categories. This is

because the main principle of literary translation is the dominance of poetic communicative

function. It means that in addition to rendering information to the reader, literary translation

also has aesthetic functions. A translation will only be considered literary if it is deemed

literature in TT (Toury,1995). The artistic image created in the particular literary work (be it

the image of a character or nature) will certainly have an impact on the reader. For this

reason, the literary translator should take into account specific features of the text. It is the

poetic focus of the text that makes this type of translation different from, say, texts of an

informative type. When reading a story, poem or any other type of literary work translated

from a foreign language, we perceive the text itself with its meaning, emotions and

characters. It is quite a challenging task to achieve the main goal of the translation – creating

a particular image for the reader. Therefore, literary translation might involve some

deviations from the standard rules. A literal translation cannot reflect the depth and meaning

of the literary work. A literary translator reproduces a non-literal rendition of the original

text. It is all about how the translator perceives it. He/she rewrites the text from the beginning

to the very end. This applies, for example, when an obvious expression is replaced by

synonyms or the structure of sentences is changed (Toury1995).

The theories behind Literary Translation

Literary translation and its study both are at times dismissed as irrelevant to

translation theory and to the teaching of translation practice in translation studies. Some

translation studies scholars view them as too eccentric, too specialized, and perhaps even too

precious to be taken seriously as the basis for developing translation theory, for more general

theoretical inquiries about translation, and for the teaching of translation practice to those

preparing for careers in the marketplace.



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Eugene A. Nida.

Nida is a founder in the fields of translation theory. His main focus was bible

translation yet his theory can be applied to any translation. His approach helps translators in

capturing the essence, spirit and semantic of the original text. Nida’s approach is linguistics

that enlightens how a language works. Nida is in support of ‘free translation. In literal

translation spirit is neglected is and meaning is unharmed. Another concept given by Nida is

equivalence. It has two types: formal and dynamic equivalence; in formal equivalence the

main point to focus is message. While in dynamic equivalence the focal point is the spirit and

sense. According to Nida there should exists the same relation in translation with receiver as

the source text and its receiver had (Nida 1964).

Lawrence Venuti

Another theorist discussed in thesis is Lawrence Venuti; he is a very influential

theorist and translators. Venuti compares translation to terrorism. The strategies, he has

pointed out are domestication and foreignizing ( Weissbort, 2006). In the first one, translation

is made by taking recognizable elements from the target text,. The cultural ideals of the target

text are highlighted. in foreignzing the text emphasis is given to the culture of the source text,

Venuti is in favor of foreinizing the text in the present world scenario (venuti ,1993). Venuti

has determined on the theory and practice of translation. He is considered one of the most

critically minded figures in modern translation theory.

In The Translator's Invisibility: A History of Translation, Venuti puts forward the

strategy of

foreignization, which aims at "sending the reader abroad" in the sense of challenging

dominant values in the receiving culture, instead of "bringing the author back home", as is the

case when a translation is domesticated by assimilating the source text to those

values.(Venuti,1993)

Christiane Nord

Christiane Nord is in support of functional approach of translation. In this approach

there is set of functions for the TT and translator can adopt strategies to fulfill the functions

of the TT (Nord ,2005) According to her ST is of great importance in translation. I have used

Nord’s model for the analysis of translations. Nord has further elaborated the theory of

Vermeer known as Skopos theory. Nord has given much significance to the ST. without

target text it is impossible to do translation. She has given two types of text translations 1.

Documentary translation and 2. Instrumental translation. In documentary translation local

color is sealed while in instrumental translation the message is conveyed honestly from the

source text sender to the target text recipient. There are three kinds of instrumental translation

types. The first type is known is equification and the second type is called hetero function.

This is used to when TT recipient will not be able to understand the ST. The third type is



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homologues translating; in which parallel effect is created in the TT. Nord likes instrumental

type more. According to Nord faithfulness with ST is essential but it would become thorny if

the initiator has put purpose that is poles apart from the TT. A comprehensive analysis of the

ST is needed before translation. The intended function of the target text is very important.

This is based on the requirement of the initiator. The important factors during translation

process are: the initiator, the translator, the receiver, extratextual factors, intratextual factors,

macro and micro strategies. (Nord,2005). I have applied Nord’s theory for the analysis of

translations.

Analysis of the Translation

The Urdu translation of the novel will be analysed. The strategies used by the

translator will be described.

The Old man and the Sea ST analysis

The story starts with the introduction of the old man and it is told that eighty-four

days have passed and the old has not caught a fish. The boy who used to go with the old man

has forbidden by his parents to not to go with the old man for fishing because he is a

salo(unfortunate). The boys wishes to go with the old man but he cannot. The old man tells

the boy that tomorrow he will go for fishing very early in the morning, very far in the sea. the

old man goes far in the sea and catches a marlin but on the way back, sharks attack the

marlin, few of them are killed by the old man but they too many and he was old, tired and

alone. At last, reaches back with the Skelton of the fish. His hands were badly hurt and he

was dead tired. People appreciate the size of the marlin and old man lay in his shack, sleeping

and dreaming about the lions on the beach.

Extra textual factors

The sender of the story is Ernest Hemingway. He is a famous American, novelist and

short story writer. He has written many short stories and novels.

The audience of the novel is American population. The target group is not defined

clearly so it could be any one. It is a fact that story of the novel is universal so the e range of

the target audience increases automatically. To read this knowledge, no specific knowledge is

required but there are some things that may hinder the understanding; for example, specific

fishing terms, some Spanish words and knowledge about baseball players of the time when

novel was written.

The medium for presenting the novel is a book. The typical novels are in book form.

The source text recipients and the target text receivers are used to of receiving novels in book

form so there is no difference in the medium. It was published in America by Scribs. Since

the novel is written in American English there will be reference to American culture.

The story was written in 1952 so the language will be according to the time.



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Hemingway’s intention of writing this novel was to establish his position as an author

who is still able to produce quality novel. And this definitely maintained his stature as a

novelist.

Intratextual Factors

The novel is about Santiago. This is written in third person; someone is telling the

story about the old man. Santiago is unable to catch a fish for eighty-four days and the boy

who used to go with him is now not with him anymore. The old man goes for fishing alone he

catches a Marlin but, on the way, back home, sharks attack the fish and eat it. The old man

fights bravely with sharks. The content of the story is fictional but it seems as if we are

reading a real story Hemingway has used many fishing jargons because of his knowledge

about fishing.

One of the presuppositions is that receivers know about fishing terminology and the

lives of fishermen. However, it is not possible that everyone is aware about the life style of

fishermen. The macro structure of the novel corresponds to other novels. In the start there is a

dedication. This novel is not divided into chapters. The novel is written into short well

written sentences and paragraphs. The dialogues are short and show the level of the speaker.

There are few non-verbal elements in the novel; one of them is the title of the book. The title

of the novel is scene of a sea with few houses before it and a few boats in the sea.

The lexis of the novel is not complex but a lot of fishing jargons has been used. The

story is written in third person. The novel starts with the introduction of the old man.

Example 5.1

‘He was an old man who fish alone in a skiff in the Gulf Stream and he has gone

eighty -four days without taking a fish’. (pg. 1)

The old man’s physical appearance has been described in such a way that a picture is formed

in the reader’s mind.

Example 5.2

‘The old man was thin and gaunt with deep wrinkles in the back of his neck’. (pg 1)

Although the story is told in third person there are dialogues by the old man, the boy

and few other characters. Most of the dialogues are by the old man because he is the focus of

the story.

Target Text Analysis- Borah aur samudar سمندر بوڑھا اور

In the following section I will analyze the target text \, which is the Urdu version of

the Old man and the sea, (Borah aur samudar)

Extra textual Factors

The sender of the target text is still Hemingway. Since it’s a translation so, the text

producer is of more importance and he is Shahid Hameed. The initiator of the novel is not



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clear whether he is the translator or the publisher. Shahid Hameed has also translated many

other novels into Urdu. The target audience is the people of Pakistan. Anyone who knows

Urdu can be the target audience for the novel because no age group is specified. It seems that

intended function of the novel is to create the same effect that is created in the source text.

The version which I have is of 2015 and unfortunately it is not known when it was

first published. The source was published in 1952 so there is a great difference between the

dates. The translator wants to make this translation popular as the original one. This

information is not confirmed because I have no contact with the translator or the publisher.

One reason for translation could be that is translated for graduation students because it is

included in the syllabus of BA Arts in Pakistan. If we assume this then there is a difference in

the recipients of the novel by Hemingway and by shahid Hameed. The translator saw the

potential in the story and translated it. There is a great difference between the recipients

because they belong to different cultures. The target text audience may have some

expectations of the author because he has already translated few books.

The target text is presented in the same medium as the source text. The target text is

produced and received in Pakistan. It was published in 2015. The initiator must have thought

that this is a very famous novel and it could be as popular in Pakistan as well. The function of

the TT will also be the same.


The subject matter of the novel is same as of the ST. The TT is about the old man

how he was unable to catch a fish for eighty-four days. The translator has not changed

anything in the story. The content is also the same. The location is also the same. The non-

verbal element in the novel is the cover. In the copy that I have it is the figure of a man as if

he standing in water. The original cover of the novel is different from this in which few huts

can be seen in front of a sea. In the original cover the reader get some idea that the story is

about sea life but in the translation by Shahid Hameed it is not clear but there is only a human

figure. The lexis used in the translation is different from the ST to some extent. Sometimes

there is a very old-fashioned type of feeling in the TT. Some words used in the text are not

used by anyone in Pakistan these days. The translation in Urdu is correct but the only thing is

this that vocabulary used by the translator is difficult.

Example

‘It made the boy sad to see the old man come in each day with his skiff empty.’

(pg 1'۔ )ہوتا تھا کہ بوڑھا ہر روز اپنی خالی کشتی لے کر لوٹتا ہے رنجیدہکا یہ دیکھ کر 'لڑ

arka yeh dekh kar ranjiidah hota tha kih burha har roz aapni khali kushti lae kar L

lutta ha.

‘



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In this example ranjeeda could simple have been translated as dukh because ranjeeda

is not the word that is commonly used in Urdu. The Urdu word dukh is commonly used. And

lotta could have been wapis atta ha.

Example

‘It was papa made me leave. I am a boy and I must obey him.’ (pg2)

)pg 2(۔ہے پڑتی کرنی اطاعت مًا لاز یک ان مجھے اور نا ہوں لڑکا ںیم۔ ایچھڑوا مجھے نے والد رےیم'

‘Mery walid ny mujhy churwiya. Mein larka hun na aur mujy un ki lazman ittaat karni

parti ha.’

The word papa has been translated as walid , it is not commonly used in Urdu now.

And obey has been translated as itaat which is used very less while speaking. Walid could

have been translated as abu or even papa because now most of the people use these words

instead of walid.

Some words has been used as it is by the Shahid Hmeed . He has not translated the

words.

Example

“Yes,” the boy said. “Can I offer you a beer on the Terrace and then we’ll take the

stuff home.’(pg 2)

ہی ہم پھر اور ۔گا پلاؤں ریب بوتل کو آپ ںیم ۔ںیہ چلتے پر (terrace) رسیٹ۔کہا لڑکےنے'ہاں'

(pg2) '۔گے ںیچل لے گھر سامان

‘Haan’.larkey ney kha’ terrace pr chalty hain aur mein aap ko aik bottle beer pilaon ga

aur phir hum yeh saaman ghar ley chlein gey.’

The word ‘terrace’ and ‘beer’ has not been translated and used as they were in ST.

Macro strategy

A translator uses an overall macro translation strategy to work with which is

dependent on the function the translation will fulfill. The novel contains few things which

are culturally specific and it will be difficult for the TT receiver to perceive them. Shahid

Hameed has used a macron strategy that is ST oriented, he has remained loyal the ST. The

translator has also remained to loyal to the content of the source text. The old-fashioned

words have been used by the translator. Shahid Hameed has used the words as it is without

changing them, he has not translated them

Example

“The Yankees cannot lose.” (pg4)

(pg 7).سکتے نہیں ہار یانکی



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Yankee haar nhi saktey.

“I can order one. (pg 5)

سکتا ہوں'۔( میں اس کا آرڈر دے

Mein is ka order dey sakta hun.

Old fashioned words have also been used with a consistency in the TT.

Example

“I’m ready now,” the old man said. “I only needed time to wash.” (pg 6)

Mein ab tyaar hun. Mujy bas apna munh hath dhoney k liy kuch waqat darkaar tha.

( pg10بس منہ ہاتھ دھونے کے لیے کچھ وقت درکار ہے۔) ہوں۔مجھےمیں اب تیار

The word used for ‘needed’ can be ‘chahiy’ instead of ‘darkaar’ that is not commonly

used in Urdu.

Micro Strategy

Dominant micro strategy used by Shahid is that he has done word for word

translation. Most of the writers use this strategy (Schjoldager,2008) Direct translation is an

easy way to use in short sentences. Shahid Hameed has used the micro strategies very well.

There are no big mistakes in translation. However, the vocabulary used by Shahid Hameed is

difficult. Sometimes the translators has used future tense unnecessarily in translation.

Target Text Analysis- Burha Admi aur Samundar

In this section I will analyze the TT, which is translated by Rana M. Younas Shukeeb

into Urdu. It is interesting to note how two translators have translated the same text.

Extratextual Factors

The sender of the TT text is Hemingway. He is the author and his name is accredited

for the book. The text producer and translator is Rana M. Younas Shukeeb. The copy which I

have is published by Nadeem Book Fort in 2017; and it is a revised version. It was published

in Pakistan. The focus of the story is the old man as in the ST. This translation is produced

specifically for the graduation students in Pakistan, because this novel is included in the

syllabus of Punjab University. The motive of this translation is to make the novel easy for

students. The TT has different function from the ST.



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The subject matter is same as that of the ST. Burah Admi aurSamudar is about the

old man who was unable to catch the fish for eighty-four days. The content has not changed.

It is still the story of an old man. The lexis used in the TT is similar to the lexis used in the

ST. Word for word translation has been used by the translator.

Example

He was an old man who fished alone in a skiff in the Gulf Stream. (pg1)

اپنی چھوٹی سی کشتی میں مچھلیاں پکڑا کرتا تھا۔'تھا۔جو آدمی 'وہ ایک بوڑھا

Who aik burah admi ha jo apni choti si kashti mein machliana pakra karta tha.

“If you were my boy, I’d take you out and gamble,” he said. (pg 3)

کر جانے کا جوا کھیل لیتا۔'میرے بیٹے ہوتے تو میں تمہیں اپنے ساتھ لے اگرتم '

Agar tum mery bety hoty tu mein tumhein samudar mein ley janey ka juaa khel leta.

The translator has used appropriate words for translation to make the meaning clear

even if there is no equivalent word in the target language.

“Supper,” said the boy. “We’re going to have supper.”(pg 5)

میرے بیٹے ہوتے تو میں تمہیں اپنے ساتھ لے کر جانے کا جوا کھیل لیتا۔'تم اگر'

(pg 63)

Shaam ka khana. larkey ney kha. hum sham ka khana khaney lgey hein.

the translator has used fish as feminine because in Urdu fish is considered feminine

while in the ST fish is described as masculine.

“It was only his turn,” he said. “He’ll take it.”(pg 15)

نے کہا وہ اسے لے لے گی'۔چکرتھا۔اس 'یہ س کا

(pg89)

yeh us ka chakar tha. us ney kha who isey ley ley gi.

Macro Strategy

Shukeeb has kept in mind the TT recipients. The TT is close to the ST but in an

idiomatic way.

looking after the skiff for him. “How is he?” one of the fishermen shouted.

“Sleeping,” the boy called.’ (pg 46)



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(pg177)

Is ka kia haal ha?aik machery ny chila kr pocha . soo rha ha. larkey ney btya.

In micro strategy the translator has used direct translation and sometimes deletion.

Results

In the earlier sections I have analyzed the translations of The Old Man and the Sea. It

was translated by Shahid Hameed, a famous translator. Even before I started the analysis, I

had some idea that the translation done by Rana M. Shukeeb will be better than the other one.

The ST’s were written by the same author. The novel was written in 1952 and the intent ion of

the novelist was to preserve his losing reputation. As far as the intratextual factors are

concerned, the lexix used by Hameed are old fashioned. There are many words throughout

the text that are rather old fashioned. Shakeeb has succeeded in translating the text

appropriately. He has used words as they are used normally. There are no wrong translations.

The functions of both of the translations are different. Shahid Hameed has translated

for general public and Rana Shukeeb has translated for graduation students. Both have

translated the text in short crispy sentences making it colloquial. Both macro strategies, ST

oriented and TT oriented has been used by the translators. Shahid Hameed has remained

close to the ST. Shukeeb has used TT oriented strategy. Hameed has mostly used the source

text strategy but whenever it is needed, he has used the TT strategy. Hameed has mostly

used the direct translation method. Many of the words has been not translated in TT and has

been used as it is. On the other hand, Shukeeb has translated the words. For example, he has

used the word shraab for beer which has been used as it is by the Hameed. Both of the

translators has very minimally used the deletion strategy

Conclusion

This project work has been devoted to the literary translation. This has enabled me to

know what literary translation is and what the elements that should be considered are. A work

is considered literary translation if it is deemed literary in target culture. There are a lot of

literary theories that can help a translator in translation. There are some words which have no

translation in Urdu like Yankee and Terrace. Loan words has also been used e. g lamar.

Paraphrasing has also been used. There is room for improvement in both translations. Old

fashioned words can be avoided. Nothing should be deleted if it is necessary to delete

something; it should be done in such a way that it does not spoil the effect of the TT.

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