15 STEPS TO BECOMING A

BETTER PERSON

By Bill Barlow

@LifeIsAPitch

WHY BECOME A BETTER PERSON?

2 Reasons: For Yourself For Others

Many studies show that your health is improved when you help others. A 2013 study by the University of Exeter Medical School found that volunteering was connected to lower rates of depression, high reports of well-being, and a significant reduction in mortality risk. And a 2005 Stanford study found that those who volunteer live longer than those who don't. But helping others means that you may need to be a better person.

WHY BECOME A BETTER PERSON?

If you need selfish reasons to for becoming a better person consider these. The effects of giving back are especially dramatic: A 2011 Johns Hopkins study found that

volunteering seniors were more likely to engage in brain-building activities, which lowers the risk of Alzheimer's disease.

A 2013 study by United Health Group found that employee volunteer programs increased engagement and productivity. The study showed that volunteers were healthier and more productive in business, more creative and collaborative and less prone to burnout and overwork.

WHY BECOME A BETTER PERSON?Studies also showed that:

Over 75 percent of the employees who had volunteered said they felt healthier.

Over 90 percent said their volunteering had put them in a better mood.

Over 75 percent reported experiencing less stress.

Ninety-six percent said that volunteering enriched their sense of purpose in life (which in turn has been found to strengthen our immune function).

Employees who volunteered also reported improved time-management skills and enhanced ability to connect with peers.

WHY BECOME A BETTER PERSON?If you want to reap the health benefit or just actually be a better person I created 15 easy steps that can help you.

Individually these may seem like common sense but if done together they will evoke change in you and those around you.

1. BECOME SELF-AWARE “What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself”Abraham Maslow 

BECOMING SELF-AWARE Listen to yourself and pay attention to

the interaction that you have with others.

If you pay attention you may start to notice that at some point in your interactions things seem to go wrong.

Try to determine what happens and how you can change that.

Being aware of this can help you change it.

2. STOP BEING ANGRY “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”

STOP BEING ANGRY Being angry or getting angry easily is

the number one reason why you may be having a difficult time in being a better person.

Once you can become aware of this you can start to change it.

Learn to let go of anger, envy and hatred.

Our frustration should not be taken out on others. 

3.SPEAK IN A KIND WAY ‘Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.”Mark Twain

SPEAK IN A KIND WAY Something as simple as speaking in a

kind way can improve your relationships.

Kindness promotes kindness.

Over simplified; speak kind to others and they will speak kind to you.

4.LEARN TO LISTEN. LIKE TO LISTEN.‘I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen.”Ernest Hemmingway

LEARN TO LISTEN. LIKE TO LISTEN. Listening is learning.

When you listen to others they tend to gravitate toward your kindness.

When you like to listen you will see a remarkable change in the relationships you have with other.

The change goes far beyond listening itself.

5.SMILE AND LAUGH MORE“A smile is a curve that sets everything straight”Phyllis Diller

“To truly laugh you must be able to take your pain and play with it”Charlie Chaplin

SMILE AND LAUGH MORE Smiles are as contagious as laughter.

People are attracted to smiles and laughter because it spreads happiness.

Even in difficult times thoughtful smiles and tasteful laughter can bring someone away from depressing thoughts.

Be warned however, it will have the same effect on you.

6.MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH A SMILE“There is still a part of me that wants to hold my head up and make eye contact”Cameron Diaz

MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH A SMILE Positive and friendly people make eye

contact.

When you speak to someone, look at them.

When you look at them smile.

This is something so simple yet so elusive these days.

7.TO BE POSITIVE THINK POSITIVE“Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you will start having positive results”Willie Nelson

TO BE POSITIVE THINK POSITIVE Positive thoughts bring positive action. To accomplish this, think positive thoughts in your

mind. Try to find the positive side of every situation. Where possible articulate this to someone,

(examples) “the good news is…”, “look on the bright side…”, “Well at least they didn’t…that would have been worse”.

Incorporating positive speech is the byproduct of positive thoughts.

Positive outcomes are the byproduct of positive speech.

8.ARE YOU A BLESSING OR A CURSE?“Every Blessing ignored become a curse”Paulo Coelho

“Life has no blessing like a prudent friend”Euripides

ARE YOU A BLESSING OR ARE YOU A CURSE? Everything you do is either a blessing or a curse. You can change your life and the lives of those around

you very quickly. Try to determine if you are saying or doing something

positive or creating comments or actions that are negative.

All of your negatives are curses. All of your positives are blessings.

When you bring blessings, you are either helping someone, encouraging some or listening to someone.

When you bring a curse you are criticizing or saying negative things, refusing to help or refusing to listen.

You can be a dream maker or a dream breaker for someone solely by your words and actions to others.

9.ALWAYS BE ENTHUSIASTIC‘Enthusiasm is the mother of effort, and without it nothing great was ever achieved.”Ralph Waldo Emerson

ALWAYS BE ENTHUSIASTIC It is one thing to think positive and

another to act positive.

Being enthusiastic brings a second level of positive energy to a situation.

Doing positive, avoiding negative but not being enthusiastic is being neutral.

10.TELL PEOPLE WHAT THEY MEAN TO YOU“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”Maya Angelou

TELL PEOPLE WHAT THEY MEAN TO YOU Give someone a completely unsolicited

compliment. 

Do something nice for someone else – for no reason.

Even if the person is a stranger say something nice that you don’t have to say.

You will see the immediate effects of kindness take over.

11. LEARN HOW TO APOLOGIZEMore people should apologize, and more people should accept apologies when sincerely made.Greg Lemond

LEARN HOW TO APOLOGIZE Being a better person is not just about what

we do for others it is what we do together with others.

It is important to understand that sometime we are at fault, we were the cause or we started an issue.

Be aware of this, let go of the anger associated with this, smile and sincerely apologize while telling someone what they mean to you.

This can be powerful as it releases negative energy within you that hill otherwise block you from achieving your goals.

12.COMPLAIN LESS AND MAKE FEWER EXCUSES“Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do.”Benjamin Franklin

COMPLAIN LESS AND MAKE FEWER EXCUSES When things are not going your way how do you

sound to others? How do you like listening to others complain? There is a way to be constructive, positive and

accurate when the situation warrants. In most cases you will find that your complaints

have no purpose other than being a display of your raw emotions.

Consequently, making excuses is often much the same thing.

Think about what you are complaining about, why you are complaining and how it sounds to others. This will dramatically impact what you say.

13.DON’T SAY “I CAN’T” FOR 24 HOURS“I can't go back to yesterday - because I was a different person then.”Lewis Carol

DON’T SAY “I CAN’T” FOR 24 HOURS This is going beyond complaining less

and not making excuses.

This exercise really stretches you to do things you may not want to do and helps you to be a better person.

Do something someone asks you to do and you will fell better when you are finished.

14.HELP OTHERS ON PURPOSE“Help others achieve their dreams and you will achieve yours.”Les Brown

HELP OTHERS ON PURPOSE Realize that the foundation to being a

better person is to help those around you. 

When others feel better as a result of your help you feel better as well.

Studies have shown that this people who help others have less stress, feel healthier and are in better moods than those who don’t help others.

15.LEARN TO WALK AWAY“No one saves us but ourselves. We ourselves must walk the path.”Buddha

“Man only likes to count his troubles, but he does not count his joys”Fyodor Dostoevsky

LEARN TO WALK AWAY If a situation compromises your values it will eat

away at you. You will be negatively affected by these

situations. First try to be positive and change the situation

by telling others how you feel. Tell them why you are not comfortable and what is bothering you.

Listen to their response. If you realize that the situation will not change then you need to walk away.

No one has the power to change every negative situation, once you determine that you can’t change it, it is ok to remove yourself. You will feel better for doing so.

SO WHY BECOME A BETTER PERSON?

Why Not?If you don’t want to do it for someone else, do it for yourself.

15 STEPS TO BECOMING A

BETTER PERSON

By Bill Barlow

@LifeIsAPitch