1 Vorhexen 2520 : HumansGridiron Gazette: Humans 1 Vorhexen 2520 Issue #1 Everyone knows the...
Transcript of 1 Vorhexen 2520 : HumansGridiron Gazette: Humans 1 Vorhexen 2520 Issue #1 Everyone knows the...
Gridiron Gazette
: Humans 1 Vorhexen 2520
Issue #1
Everyone knows the Reikland Reavers . . . but what about the other Human teams who take to the astrogranite??
Edition one of the Gridiron Gazette casts its eye over the ‘lesser’ Human
teams to have played the great game.
INSIDE
__
Middenheim Marauders
You can smell the Chaos
from here!
__
Albion Wanderers
Kicking the ball . . . ?
Strange but true.
__
Bad Bay Hackers
From underdogs to over
lords!
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Creeveland Crescents
Talent wasted?
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The Other Reavers
Prepare to go oooh-la-la
at Port D’Acquitaine!
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Who’s Who
The full player directory
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Trophy Cabinet
Blood Bowl winners
(2469)
Blood Bowl Runners Up
(2477, 2483)
Whiteskull Challenge Cup
Winners (2432)
Chaos Cup Winners
(2490)
Famous Players
The Marauders have
always enjoyed the taint
of Chaos, despite the fact
they are a Human team.
They have never been
afraid to take on players
who are different to the
‘norm’ shall we say.
Famous faces to have
worn the Marauder jersey
includes –
➢ Bob Bifford (Ogre)
➢ Karla von Kill
(Human)
➢ Withergrasp
Doubledrool
(Beastman)
➢ Massif “Hungry”
Bofine (Minotaur)
➢ Uthar Hagg (Half
Orc).
Staff
The Marauders were
coached by Goran Slaver,
a man of particularly
violent tendencies. One
season he killed his own
assistant with a chainsaw!
When the Marauders
became the Maulers, ex-
club captain Uther Hagg
became the Head Coach.
The club’s mascot was a
goat named Janet. Alas
the whereabouts of poor
Janet remain a mystery!
The Middenheim Marauders - By Dolf Ungerhaagen
The Middenheim Marauders franchise still exists, but they have changed quite a
lot over the years. We’re covering here their early history where they played as a
Human team before a merger and the inclusion of Dwarfs and Halflings on the
roster.
Stadium
In earlier and simpler times, the Marauders played in the Karl Franz arena, formerly
known as the Middenheim Arena. It was a large stadium seating up to 83,000 people for
each game. The stadium was known for its temperate weather during games and
officials who were surprisingly good!
History
2465 – After a successful season, the Marauders were all killed in a mysterious flying
carpet accident. The following season, the Blood Bowl winning Champions of Death
team looked strangely like the lost Marauders. Tomolandry assured everyone that this
was purely a coincidence!
2472 – Bob Bifford comes out of retirement and is signed for one game by the
Marauders to play against the Chaos All-Stars. The game is famous for the clash
between Bob and Morg N’Thorg. Bob came out on top, flattening Morg and scoring the
winning touchdown while whistling the Middenheim city anthem.
2477 – The Marauders lose the Blood Bowl final to the Skavenblight Scramblers 3-1 in a
torturous match that lasts a massive 9 hours! Exhausting!
2486 – Karla von Kill is signed for the Middenheim Marauders and quickly goes on to
make her name
2489 – After the collapse of the NAF, the team get into financial trouble. They change
their name to The Marauders, sell their stadium and become a touring team. The
financial troubles continue to follow them however and so in order to stay in business,
they merge with the Middenland Maulers. The new team, the Middenheim Maulers, are
very multi-racial but the Marauders had rarely just fielded humans historically.
Cross Code
The Marauders famously played in a Blood Bowl exhibition match against the Blood Axes
who are normally a Dungeon Bowl team. The Blood Axes failed to understand the fact
that one teams starts with the ball rather than needing to find it. This led to a crushing
15-0 defeat as they frantically tried to find non-existent chests!
Tanks very much
The Marauders played in the only game so far to feature a Goblin tank fielded, by the Evil
Gits. Luckily Massif Bofine was on hand to rip open the tank with his horns and scoff
Stranglegut the unfortunate goblin tank driver. He was soon spat out however, as Massif
explained later, he didn’t like “canned meat”!
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Albion Wanderers - By Gerhardt Schtumpf
The Wanderers are a secretive bunch! Hailing from the far-off misty isle
of Albion and coached by Bob Berobsson , they proved to be a better
cup than league team.
The Wanderers took a long while to adapt to Blood Bowl outside of Albion
where the rules were slightly different. Their first games were a disaster,
including an incident where the Gouged Eye spit roast and ate 3 of their
players in front of them on the sidelines!
They played in the AFC Northern Division but rarely made an impact. That
contrasts heavily to their record in the other majors where they enjoyed
significant success. They won the Whiteskull Challenge Cup in 2433 and
then after it changed its name to the Chaos Cup, took it home a further 5
times (2444, 2454, 2457, 2474, 2488).
Alas they never survived the collapse of the NAF. Financially destitute, they
returned to Albion to take a up strange game where you kicked the ball
instead!
In name only!
The Blood Bowl world is vast and so
there are loads of teams out there that
we know exist . . . but we don’t know
anything about them at all!
Here is a quick shout out to the Human
teams we know in name only…
➢ Albion All-Stars
➢ Altdorf Griffons
➢ Armageddon Avengers
➢ Bordeleaux Ravens
➢ Carroburg Crusaders
➢ Golden Griffons
➢ Leitdorf United
➢ Lions of Couronne
➢ Middenham United
➢ Nuln River Boaters
➢ Paravon Penetrators
➢ Reikland Riot Girls
➢ Rostov Renegades
➢ Talabheim Morningstars
➢ Team Errant
Altdorf All-Stars
The All-Stars were only formed for one
brief and glorious season. They were
made up of players from the Reikland
Reavers, Middenheim Maulers and the
Altdorf Avengers.
Led by Griff Oberwald they made the
Blood Bowl final in 2503 only to see
their dreams crushed at the hands of
Count Luthor von Drakenborg.
Fighting Talk!
Both the Nuln Oilers and Nuln
Ironflanks are famous for just one
thing – losing bar room brawls!
Creeveland Crescents
This former AFC Eastern team has a long history of underachieving. Yes, they won the Blood
Bowl in 2476, but the player strike was just starting and their opponents were the Greenfield
Grasshuggers!! The Green and Whites have always boasted rosters full of talent but rarely turn
it into results. They were the first outfit Bob Bifford played for in his rookie year, gave a home to
Rotten Rick Bupkeis while he was alive and enjoyed the Ninja skills of Hoshi Komi as well as the
dancing thrills from the deadly Harry “The Hammer” Kehry. Just a shame they couldn’t build on
such talents! Now they’re a shadow of themselves, reduced to being a touring team since 2488
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Trophy Cabinet
Whiteskull Challenge Cup
Winners (2431)
Purity Cup Winners
Those paying close attention
to the dates will note that
somehow, the Crusaders won
the Whiteskull Challenge
Cup 10 years before they
were officially formed. . . .
Recruitment Policy
All players must be extremely
physically fit (it’s a tough
game after all) and need to
prove they are mentally sane
(as outlined in the Holy
Guidelines of the sixth
Appendix) and to have
memorized the rules by heart
inside out. As the rules
currently come in 14
volumes, each 1000 pages
long, that’s a lot of reading!
Typically, only Humans tend
to play on the Bright
Crusaders but that there have
been instances where Dwarfs
have been signed.
Staff
Ingrid the Pious was the
owners and spiritual leader of
the Bright Crusaders, but
over the years she employed
a string of different head
coaches including –
➢ Dolph “The Saint”
Gurmann
➢ Father E.A. “The Padre”
Matten
➢ Kurt Heilger
Clearly coaching the
Crusaders requires the
patience of a saint!
The Bright Crusaders - By Rusty Hoelle
The Bright Crusaders have veered between the quiet, noble grace of a Knightly
Order and the wide-eyed fanaticism of an extreme cult of Nuffle. Neither
grace nor undiluted faith however seems to have brought them much luck on
the pitch. They play be an extreme code and don’t believe in bending even
the most minor of laws, making them really stand out from all of their peers.
History
2417 – An orphaned child is adopted by the Order of the Unchallenged Call, a devout sect in
the Nuffle faith, she is given the name Ingrid.
2438 – Now a young woman, Ingrid goes on the Prime Stadium Circuit Pilgrimage but is
appalled by what she saw. The lack of faith troubled her greatly and so she prayed
2441 – Having found financial backers, Ingrid sets up the Bright Crusaders and goes about
trying to recruit players who meet her very, very exacting standards
2449 – Finally Ingrid has enough players to start a team! The team don’t perform that well
however and results are hard to come by
2463 – Results start to change when Peter Lowenhart joins from the Rostov Renegades. The
star Blitzer brings some actual talent and not just blind faith to the team and introduces the
famous “Left Hook” formation, winning many games.
2472 – The infamous Quagmire incident match takes place against the Elfheim Eagles. The
Eagles wizards cast the Quagmire spell 93 times during the game causing the Crusaders
stadium to sink into the earth and never be seen again. The Colleges of Magic were forced to
change the rules, limiting teams to just one wizard per game.
2485 – The Crusaders match against the Dark Renegades was abandoned due to lack of balls!
Dark Elf Pinespite Venge had a mutation where he secreted a sticky substance from his body
and all 19 match balls stuck to him, breaking a NAF record!
2489 – Following the collapse of the NAF, the Crusaders got into financial trouble and called in
a team of accountants. As soon as they showed their books to the accountants the Crusaders
were closed immediately due to their financial peril!
Cross Dressing
Another clash with the Elfheim Eagles was called off due to the Crusaders new uniforms and
the weather. It was raining and so the Elfs may get muddy was reason enough, but the
hideous designs the Crusaders wore were so last season darling! However, the Crusaders do
have a crack squad of Nuns to buff their armour mid-game should it ever get dirty during a
game.
Thanks Fairy Much
The Bright Crusaders were the very first team to play a match against a Forest Folk team made
up of Brownies, Pixies, Gnomes and Centaurs. The game was close as the scantily clad fairies
proved a distraction even for the super pious Crusader players.
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Bad Bay Hackers - By Lastiges Weisschen
The Hackers under the leadership of Captain ‘Peg’Leg’ Haaken prove
that with the right ingredients, any team can enjoy success.
Emblazoned in Green and Yellow, the Hackers have shot through the Blood
Bowl ranks in recent years. Their rise to fame was kick started with the
signing of star thrower Dunkel Hoffnung. It wasn’t too long before they had
poached Dirk Heldmann and Spinne Schonheit from the Reavers. These
three along with Ogre M’Grash KThragsh and Blitzer Rhett Cavre formed the
nucleus of a powerhouse team.
The Hackers have enjoyed a great deal of success winning the Blood Bowl
(2560), making the final on two other occasions (2558, 2559) as well as
winning the Spike! Magazine Open (2560, 2561) and the Tobazco Cup
(2561).
Known to play anywhere, the Hackers games have taken them to the new
world and the realm of chaos itself. Along the way they have suffered a
high casualty rate and have used Undead, Treemen, Pygmies and Beastmen
to pad out their roster. At times they are hardly human at all!
Altdorf Hammers
Hammers fans need patience to
watch their team play. A highly
religious outfit, they only take to the
astrogranite when the twin tailed
comet can be seen in the sky.
Famous for one thing . . .
Some teams rarely if ever gain any
fame. Some seek to buy renown,
however. You would probably never
of heard of the Averland Knights or
the Hochland Lumberjacks if they
hadn’t have hired Bob Bifford for a
season.
Middenplatz Manglers
Under the dubious leadership of
Tyros Bundt, they follow the mantra
‘Manglers never lose!”. Sadly, this is
rarely the case. Despite winning the
Doom Bowl, they’ve rarely known
success. It’s doubtful whether they
should be considered a Human team
at all in recent seasons after they
hired Franco Fiducci the
Necromancer. Most of their players
are now Undead!
Averheim Archers
To their shame, the Archers were the
first team to ever lose against the
Lowdown Rats. The resulting riots
from both teams forced the officials
to reverse the results giving the win
to the Archers – normal order had
been restored!
That’s Magic!
Talabheim Titans – Who could forget the infamous match where a miscast spell caused the players, fans and
cheerleaders to all switch bodies? Hilarious!
Hamblinn Bushwackers – A magical Piper played a tune and made the Bushwackers opponents, the Skaven
Wyrdstone Wanderers, vanish never to be seen again. Strangely the Bushwackers coach is also missing!
Lucky Sevens – A team of the unluckiest players ever banded together and then couldn’t lose. Fate or magic?
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Port D’Aquitaine – the other Reavers - By Pierce d’Organ
Campaigning as one of the oldest teams in far Bretonnia, the Blue
and White Reavers formed in 2387 have a more recent history of
courting controversy.
One of the founding 4 teams of the Bretonnian league, the Reavers were
the first team in the knightly lands to use team colours to help their
players distinguish friend from foe. They were also the first Bretonnian
team to construct a purpose-built stadium in 2399 which they dubbed the
Rose Bowl due to the locals showering winning teams in roses.
Names matter and the Reikland Reavers sued Port D’Aquitaine over the
name Reavers. Despite the Bretonnians using the name for over 100
years they lost and in 2492 were forced to become Port D’Aquitaine
Power.
In following year in 2493 they found themselves in trouble with the RARG
who deemed that teams of all Knights were unfair and so passed a ruling
forcing Bretonnian teams to field lowly peasants as well!
Ever chivalrous, they were voted Spike! Magazines team most likely to
play fair in 2473, 2488 and 2498. Success in recent years has been rare
with only the Orcidas Team of the Year trophy (2484) gathering dust in
their trophy cabinet.
Altdorf Ale-Hole
The Ale-Hole is a seedy pub in
Altdorf that has its own Street
Bowl team. They tell a tale in
about former players in their
amateur team who went on to
make it big. A stable lad called
Griff and a bouncer named Zug.
Kicking it . . . . .
They do things differently in
Albion and their teams rarely
travel to foreign shores. During
the FA cup the spend more
time kicking the ball – madness!
Therefor who has ever heard of
the Kentish Kickers, Kingsbury
Royals, New Albion Patriots,
Notting Knights or the Blighty
Blighters?
On the up . . . ?
Nordland Rangers – Lack of
form saw the Rangers tumble down
to the minor league 3 seasons ago.
However, Blitzer Garr “The
Thnderbolt” Greyg is back in form
and they’ve just won promotion
back to the big time.
Hochland Harbringers – Struggling to be average, the
Harbringers have been on a
number of decent cup runs since
Blitzer Dreng Sturnblud returned
from retirement. A team to watch
next season!
Gone and mostly forgotten . . . .
Black Mountain Marauders – Baron Kurt Herzgerwoden promised to cover the players in gold if they won the Border
Princes Cup. They did by fielding a giant causing the Baron and the team to go bust!
Haffenheim Hornets – Mistaken for a pre-match snack in 2460 and eaten out of existence by the Oldheim Ogres!
Stirland Hotspurs – In a match against the Slaaneshi Sidewinders, the Slaanesh scrimmage line mutated into
Chaos Spawn and merged with the Hotspurs team in a giant fleshy mess! Yuck!
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Who’s Who . . . . Humanity’s finest . . . . and quite frequently Humanity’s deadest. Please note, the below does not include players who are exclusively play for the Reikland Reavers or any humans just
playing in non-Human teams i.e. Old World Alliance, Imperial Nobility, Amazons, Norse, Chaos Renegades and
Vampires.
Blitzers Name Team Status Andreas Waltheim Bad Bay Hackers Dead – crushed by a Jumbo Ball against the Chaos All-Stars
Baudwin the Strong Bright Crusaders Alive
Deathblow ** Freebooter ** Alive
Dirk Heldmann Reikland Reavers & Alive
Bad Bay Hackers
Dreng Sturnblud Rampagers & Alive
Mootland Munchers &
Hochland Harbringers
Erik Kantona Leitdorf United & Alive
Many others
Gerhardt the Penitent Bright Crusaders Alive
Gruber Nordland Rangers Alive
Helmut Knacker Blazing Helms Dead – Pushed into the crowd and killed
Johann Hapstein Lucky Sevens Alive
Jules de Bergerac ** Freebooter ** Alive
Jurgen the Upright Bright Crusaders Alive
Karla von Kill Hochtstadt Hellfires & Alive
** Freebooter **
Kirta Hoffnung Lustrian Lusties & Alive
Bad Bay Hackers
Kurt Grafstein Talabheim Titans Alive
Milo Hoffstetter Bad Bay Hackers Dead – crushed by a Jumbo Ball against the Chaos All-Stars
Nicholas Mynott Lucky Sevens Alive
Peter “The Paladin” Lowenhart Rostov Renegades & Alive
Bright Crusaders
Rhett “Rocket” Carvre Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Tyros Bundt Unknown Retired – now a Head Coach
Ulfric Holzfeller Bright Crusaders Alive
Ventris Adams Altdorf All-Stars Alive
Zara “the Slayer” ** Freebooter ** Alive
Throwers Name Team Status Dunkel Hoffnung Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Ernst Buonaviccio Bright Crusaders Alive Garr Greyg “The Thunderbolt” Nordland Rangers Alive
“Gorgeous” Gerrick Hochland Harbringers Alive
Gunter “The Mangler” Marius Hochland Harbringers Alive
Hans “Sure Hands” Greta Ostermark Bulls Dead – Spine snapped by Grashnak Blackhoof
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Throwers - continued Name Team Status Heinrich Locke Lucky Sevens Alive
Horst Mueller Middenplatz Manglers Alive
Josef Englfot Altdorf All-Stars Dead – Heart ripped out by Count Luthor von Drakenborg
Kur Ritternacht Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed by Dunkel Hoffnung
Luc Broussard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – stabbed in the eye during team try outs
Norman “Swift aem” Wilburton Lucky Sevens Alive
Siegfried Gutmann Bright Crusaders Alive
Willem Tollet ** Freebooter ** Alive
Catchers Name Team Status Berkut Balcan Middenplatz Manglers Alive Big Gunn Schonn ** Freebooter ** Alive
Boris ‘Omlette Face’Umberg Lucky Sevens Alive
Brandan van Sant Bright Crusaders Alive
Felix the Chaste Bright Crusaders Alive
Frings Leiter Hochland Harbringers Dead – stomped to death by the Moonfang Maulers
Frunk Hochland Harbringers Dead – killed by an explosion against the Bloody Ravagers
Gigia Mardretti Bad Bay Hackers Dead – crushed by a Jumbo Ball against the Chaos All-Stars
Griegor Meissen Nuln College Alive – not to be confused with the other Griegor Meissen
Guffle Pussmaw Rocktown Rumblers Alive – left to become a Nurgle Freebooter
Guilarme ** Freebooter ** Alive
Hans “Golden Shower” Schmidt Altdorf All-Stars Alive
Heckle Flurburgh The Marauders Alive
Hoshi Komi Creeveland Cresents Alive
Johan Walsh Talabheim Titans Alive
Kafre Es Isurio Flatlined Annihilators Alive
Kelled Nordland Rangers Alive
Klaus “Halfhand” Hochland Harbringers Alive
Otto Waltheim Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Thrown off the top of a stadium by the crowd
Percival Smythe Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Crushed to death by the Oldheim Ogres
Quintus Altman Altdorf All-Stars Alive
Robin le Sange ** Freebooter ** Alive
Simon Sherwood Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Killed by a wolf headed team mate
Singe de Fromage Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed in the Blood Bowl final
Spinne “Black Widow” Schonheit Reikland Reavers & Alive
Bad Bay Hackers
Torvern Nordland Rangers Alive
Vulf Nordland Rangers Alive
Weissman Hochland Harbeingers Dead – squashed by a Death Roller of the Gilded Guild team
Wilhelm Grimdolt Carrions Featsers & Alive
Lucky Sevens
Wolfhart Heldenhof Bright Crusaders Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Linemen Name Team Status Adam Kerse Lucky Sevens Alive
Al-Abdul Abdullah Unknown Dead – stomped by a 1000 kickers in an Araby league match
Anima Bad Bay Hackers Dead – drowned on a voyage to Lustria
Anton Tikjers Bright Crusaders Alive
Arik Sternright Bright Crusaders Alive
Bantam Kentish Kickers Dead – pulled apart by the Undead of the Bad Bay Hackers
Beriet Bad Bay Hackers Dead - drowned on a voyage to Lustria
Camisa Roja Bad Bay Hackers Dead - drowned on a voyage to Lustria
Ciotola Bad Bay Hackers Dead - drowned on a voyage to Lustria
Clive Keegan Kentish Kickers Alive
Christophe Baldurson Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed by the Chaos All-Stars
Conrad Knightstandt Bright Crusaders Alive
Dirk Blunt Hochland Harbringers Alive
Dirk Gallant Bright Crusaders Dead – Fell into a pit of lava while playing Dunegeon Bowl
Drakwald Dan Stirland Hot-Spurs Dead – suffered a horrible mutation against Slaaneshi Sidewinders
Drogo Bullhead Lucky Sevens Alive
Ekerd Honurschine Bright Crusaders Dead – Fell into a pit of lava while playing Dunegeon Bowl
Elegast Goedziel Bright Crusaders Alive
Erhaltenes Spiel Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Frank le Meat Unknown Retired
Franklyn Smyth Bruendar Grimjacks Dead – killed in Sylvania, became part of Farnk ‘N’ Stein
Friedrich Feather fingers Averland Knights Dead – killed by Rut Slamdunk of the Doom Lords
Friedberger Nordland Rangers Alive
Geborenes Vererteilt Bad Bay Hackers Dead – slaughtered by the Darkside Cowboys
Gellert Holstein Talabheim Titans Alive
Ginola le Ponce Unknown Retired
Grieg Daavos Rostov Renegades Retired
Guillermo Reyes Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Gulden von Sulkhof Middenheim Marauders Retired – the kidnapper of Janet the goat!
Hans the Doubtful Bright Crusaders Alive
Haral Goodstar Bright Crusaders Dead – Killed by a Genestealer that appeared in Dungeon Bowl
Harry “The Hammer” Kehry Creeveland Crescents Retired – now a dance teacher!
Hartshorn Kentish Kickers Dead – Heart ripped out by the Undead on Bad Bay Hackers
Henrick Karlmann Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Killed by a spiked ball to the head against the Chaos All-Stars
Helmut Wulf Bruender Grimjacks & Alive
** Freebooter **
Jacques Grier Paravon Penetrators Dead – Beheaded against the Nightmare Nufflers
Jacques Broussard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Stabbed to death in team try outs
Jacques Rabelaus Bright Crusaders Alive
Jager Haffa The Marauders Alive
Jager Lightfoot Ostermark Bulls Dead – Had his legs pulled off by Grishnak Blackhoof
Jameus Kaiser The Marauders Alive – plays as a ‘Kicker’
Jammernder Anfager Bad Bay Hackers Dead - drowned on a voyage to Lustria
Jegal Torp Middenheim Marauders Dead – killed by Varag Ghoulchewer
Johann Riko Bright Crusaders Alive
Johann von Wilkins ** Freebooter ** Retired – played as a ‘kicker’
Johnny Atra Treetown Wolverines Dead – 2 Oldheim Ogre players made a wish with his legs
Jorgan Bearson Lucky Sevens Alive
Jorn Puresoul Bright Crusaders Alive
Joshua le Grand ** Freebooter ** Alive
Justus the Meek Bright Crusaders Alive
Kai Albrecht Bad BayHackers Dead – Killed by the Gimlet the Lost and his chainsaw
Karfheim Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Stabbed against the Darkside Cowboys
Karsten “The Killer” Klemmer Bad Bay Hackers Dead – crushed by a Jumbo Ball against the Chaos All-Stars
Klaus the Forthright Bright Crusaders Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Linemen - continued Name Team Status
Klimt Nordland Rangers Alive
Kurt Brecher / Brother Mother Bright Crusaders Dead – Killed by a wizard lightning bolt
Lance Goodfellow Bright Crusaders Alive
Lars Engelhard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed by the Chaos All-Stars
Lucas Luckas Altdorf All-Stars Dead – Killed on scrimmage line against the Flalinned Annihilators
Lugner Hoffnung Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed in a match in the realm of chaos
McGraw Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed while playing against the Darkside Cowboys
Majors Kentish Kickers Alive
Muller Nordland Raiders Alive
Neville Rooney Mancaster Knighted Alive
Nigel Priestly Unknown Alive
Olaf Kemperman Paravon Pentrators Alive
Patric Broussard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – drowned on sea voyage to Bad Bay
Pearce Talabheim Titans Alive
Percy Kentish Kickers Dead – Beaten to death with a severed arm by Victor Shelley
Phineas Crabbe Talabheim Titans Alive
Punt O’Hamlet Middenheim Marauders Alive – played as a ‘Kicker’
Quan Yorbelvit Unknown Alive
Rell Nordland Rangers Alive
Rick Bupkeis Creeveland Crescents Dead – resurrected and plays for the Champions of Death
Roight Cleane The Marauders Alive – played as a ‘Blocker’
Rupert ‘Naked’ Nickerson Lucky Sevens Alive
Rupert Rupertson Albion All-stars Alive
Sancho Bullhead Lucky Sevens Alive
Schlechtes Gertunken Bad Bay Hackers Dead – drowned in a vat of Killer Genuine Draft
Sicheres Gegangen Bad Bay Hackers Dead – killed by the Darkside Cowboys
Siggi “The Boot” Schuster ** Freebooter ** Alive
Sigur Nordman Hochland Harbringers Alive
Silver Kentish Kickers Dead – kicked to death by Long John Stevenson
Sister Mary Mister Bright Crusaders Dead – Kneck snapped by M-Grash K’Thragsh in a bar fight
Solomon Graves Bright Crusaders Alive
Sora Oflrsdottir Middenplats Manglers Alive
Spencer von Lankyburg Middenheim Maulers Alive
Standplatz Innen Bad Bay Hackers Dead – Killed by Darkside Cowboys
Stanwell “The Spike” De Witt Middenheim Marauders Alive
Steiner S Scottwell Bruendar Grimjacks Dead – killed in Sylvania, became part of Farnk ‘N’ Stein
Stephan Kidsel Lucky Sevens Alive
Ted Hammerstein Altdorf Griffons Alive
Ullman Nordland Rangers Alive
Ulrich the Viurtuous Bright Crusaders Dead – Eaten by a Rat Ogre in the Purity Cup final
Wu Chen Unknown Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Ogres Name Team Status
Bob Bifford Creeveland Crescents & Retired – now a sports pundit
Many others!
Dumpf Nordland Rangers Alive
Ghurg Talbheim Titans Alive
M’Grash K’Thragsh Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Nog Nordland Raiders Retired
Norg l’Mgung Unknown Alive
“Tiny” Gar Hichland Harbringers Alive
Other Races The below are players from other races who through some strange twist of fate, ended up playing on a Human team.
Name Position Team Status
Bavid Deckem Wight Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell
Big Richard Pygmy Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Edgar Treeman Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Lemuel Swift Zombie Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell
Long John Stevenson Zombie Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell
Massif “Hungry” Bofine Minotaur Middenheim Marauders Alive
Mimi Scream Banshee Middenplats Manglers Alive
Oliver Dickens Zombie Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell
Slim Thom Mountain Giant Black Mountain Marauders Alive
Uthar Hagg Half-Orc Middenheim Marauders Retired – now a Head Coach
Victor Shelley Zombie Bad Bay Hackers Dead – incinerated by a wizard spell
Withergrasp Doubledrool Beastman Middenheim Marauders & Alive
** Freebooter **
Staff The staff below may be from other races but they have been employed by Human teams.
Name Position Team Status
Albrecht Dollarsharp Owner / Coach Lucky Sevens Missing – presumed Dead
Baron Kurt Herzgerworden Owner / Coach Black Mountain Marauders Missing – presumed Dead
Bob Berobsson Head Coach Albion Wanderers Alive
Captain ‘Peg-Leg’ Haaken Owner / Coach Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Crumpo Master Chef Hochland Harbringers Alive
Doc Morgrim Ironbane (Dwarf) Apothecary Middenplatz Manglers Alive
Dolph “The Saint” Gutmann Head Coach Bright Crusaders Alive
Dr Pill (Elf) Apothecary Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Emilia Cheerleader Talabheim Titans Alive
Father E.A. “The Padre” Matten Head Coach Bright Crusaders Alive
Felix Stychman Apothecary Hochland Harbringers Alive
Fergus Alexson Head Coach Mancaster Knighted Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Staff - continued Name Position Team Status
Franco Fiducci Necromancer Middenplatz Manglers Alive
Friedl Ground Staff Unknown Dead – Eaten by Toofy the Squig
Gerritt Vanderwald Head Coach Talabheim Titans Alive
Goran Slaver Head Coach Middenheim Marauders Alive
Hogan Hellhammer Head Coach Hochland Harbringers Dead – In a match against Bloody Ravagers
Horatio X Schottenheim Wizard ** Freebooter ** Alive
Ignatio Wizard Hochland Harbringers Alive
Ingrid the Pious Owner Bright crusaders Alive
Jayes Lowener Head Coach Altdorf All-Stars Alive
Johann Schmidt Owner Alotdorf Avengers Alive
Juliana Cheerleader Talabheim Titans Alive
Karl Groundstaff Unknown Alive
Kruber Head Coach Hochstadt Hellfires Alive
Kurt Heiliger Head Coach Bright Crusaders Alive
Mariella Cheerleader Talabheim Titans Alive
Mikal Fisk Apothecary Nordland Raiders Alive
Olsen Merlin (Elf) Wizard Bad Bay Hackers Dead – died as the FA Cup was destroyed
Rife Head Coach Nordland Rangers Alive
Romana Cheerleader Talabheim Titans Alive
Stephan Crass Head Coach Unknown Alive
The Hackettes Cheerleader Bad Bay Hackers Alive
Squad
The Piper Musician Hamblinn Bushwackas Alive
Tomas Assistant Coach Bright Crusaders Alive
Tyros Bundt Head Coach Middenplatz Manglers Alive
Vimmy Gloam Assistant Coach Middenheim Marauders Dead
Wulfe the Drunkard Groundsman Bright Crusaders Alive
Officials Name Position Status
Darun McGloan Referee Dead – killed during a pitch invasion in a Reavers v Gouged Eye match
Doktor Brunner von Schaadelheim NAF Egineering Advisor Alive
Erik Van Der Gann Referee Alive
Gulden von Sulkhof Referee Alive
Hanse Kohl Referee Dead – died of Nurgle’s Rot
Hinter Assistant Referee Dead – Run over by a Deathroller
Horst Oppenheimer NAF Committee Member Alive
Max “Kneecap” Mittleman Referee Alive
Mikael Vicorus Referee Dead – Eaten by Gnoblars
Udo Troff NAF scribe Alive
“Yellow” MacMurdy Referee Alive
Gridiron Gazette - Humans
Editors notes:
Some of the players, staff and officials listed here may no longer be considered entirely human . . . but they were once
when they started and so their ‘human’ selves are listed with their human originating teams.
The players here are also from a myriad of timelines – there are quite a number of decades from when we last saw
Massif Bofine on the pitch (he would be considered a Gold Era star) compared to when the Bad Bay Hackers were
formed.
Normally at Gridiron Gazette we would respect the wishes of officials to remain racially non-specific. However, due to
the need to catalgoue as many as possible, a number of assumptions have been made on some of these officials being
human. Likewise, others have been missed out (such as Nikk Threehorn) who will appear in a later issue more themed
to them.
Looking ahead . . . .
In issue 2 of the Gridiron Gazette we’ll be focused on one team to finish off the Human review – the Reikland Reavers!
Yes those glory boys have a history so rich that we can devote an entire issue to the Reavers and all of their staff and
fans.
We’ll be Answering at such questions as . . . . .
➢ What is it with Griff Oberwald’s teeth?
➢ Talking of teeth . . . . why does Mighty Zug have so many . . . ?
➢ Just how many Griegor Meissen’s are there?
For all that and so much more, join us next month for a Reavers Gazette special – huzzah!