1 PARENTING PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE CHILDREN AND YOUTH.
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Transcript of 1 PARENTING PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE CHILDREN AND YOUTH.
11
PARENTING PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE CHILDREN AND
YOUTH
PARENTING PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE CHILDREN AND
YOUTH
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Today’s Training GoalToday’s Training Goal
To assist families in understanding and managing physically aggressive
behaviors in children and youth.
To assist families in understanding and managing physically aggressive
behaviors in children and youth.
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AssumptionsAssumptions
This curriculum assumes that you are working with children who have the cognitive skills to engage in problem solving interactions with adults.
This curriculum assumes that you are working with children who have the cognitive skills to engage in problem solving interactions with adults.
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7
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6
8
6
20
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0 2 4 6 8 10 12 14 16 18 20
Age in Years
Physical Maturity
Social Skills
Reading Ability
Emotional Maturity
Money & Time Concepts
Comprehension
Expressive Language
Life Skills
18 Year Old Affected by FAS/FAE
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Body’s Stress Hormone ResponseBody’s Stress Hormone Response
Diagram source: http://www.human illnesses.com/Behavioral-Health-Sel-Vi/Stress.html
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Appropriate Expressions of Anger
Appropriate Expressions of Anger
Relaxation Techniques Problem Solving Letter to nowhere Journal Physical activity
Relaxation Techniques Problem Solving Letter to nowhere Journal Physical activity
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Anxiety: What does it FEEL like?
Anxiety: What does it FEEL like?
Heart is pumping Tingling Worried Maybe shortness of breath Helpless Scared
Heart is pumping Tingling Worried Maybe shortness of breath Helpless Scared
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Anxiety: What does it LOOK like?
Anxiety: What does it LOOK like?
Sweating
Fidgeting
Twitching
Pacing
Unable to sit still, focus, concentrate
Sweating
Fidgeting
Twitching
Pacing
Unable to sit still, focus, concentrate
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Anxiety: What does it SOUND like?
Anxiety: What does it SOUND like?
Chattering
Perseveration
Quiet
Chattering
Perseveration
Quiet
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Responding to Anxiety Behavior
Responding to Anxiety Behavior
Be supportive and non-judgmentalBe positive and reassuringUse reflective listening Ask open-ended questionsProblem Solve
Could the child listen to music on his/her headphones while at the dentist?
Could the child go to an appointment with you to observe what it is like?
Be supportive and non-judgmentalBe positive and reassuringUse reflective listening Ask open-ended questionsProblem Solve
Could the child listen to music on his/her headphones while at the dentist?
Could the child go to an appointment with you to observe what it is like?
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Defensive BehaviorDefensive Behavior
Feels Like… Stuck on idea or
problem Can’t move on Still present:
Heart Pumping Shortness of breath Tingling Worried Problem is unsolvable
Feels Like… Stuck on idea or
problem Can’t move on Still present:
Heart Pumping Shortness of breath Tingling Worried Problem is unsolvable
Looks Like… Protective of space but
quick to crowd others Doesn’t seem to listen Can’t sit still Still Present:
Sweating Pacing Twitching Fidgeting
Looks Like… Protective of space but
quick to crowd others Doesn’t seem to listen Can’t sit still Still Present:
Sweating Pacing Twitching Fidgeting
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Defensive Behavior (continued)
Defensive Behavior (continued)
Sounds Like… Rapid Speech Loud Still Present:
Perseveration Staying on same
subject
Sounds Like… Rapid Speech Loud Still Present:
Perseveration Staying on same
subject
Response Techniques: Turn down the heat
Defensiveness can escalate into aggressive behavior
Get through the sensory shutdown
Maintain a comfortable distance
Describe the current behavior and how it differs from baseline behavior.
Ask open-ended questions
Response Techniques: Turn down the heat
Defensiveness can escalate into aggressive behavior
Get through the sensory shutdown
Maintain a comfortable distance
Describe the current behavior and how it differs from baseline behavior.
Ask open-ended questions
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Aggressive BehaviorAggressive Behavior
Feels Like:High energy
Still Present:Heart pumpingShortness of breathTinglingWorriedStuck
Looks Like:Red faceTight/clenched musclesThrows objectsStill Present:SweatingPacingTwitchingFidgeting
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Aggressive Behavior (continued)
Aggressive Behavior (continued)
Sounds Like:Incessant questioningRefusals to complyVerbal attacks
Still Present:ChatteringPerseverationRapid SpeechLoud
Response Techniques:Move from emotion to thoughtDefine appropriate behaviorGive choicesStay calmWithdraw and wait
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Danger BehaviorDanger Behavior
Feels like:Muscle tensionReady to explodeOut of controlStill present:Heart pumpingShortness of breathTinglingWorriedStuck
Looks like:Feet spaced apartNeck muscles prominentEyes set and glaringFists clenchedThrowing items at youStill present:Sweating, pacing, twitching, fidgeting, not listening, can’t sit still, red face, muscles tight.
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Danger Behavior (continued)Danger Behavior (continued)
Sounds like:Verbal attacksRagePersistenceStill present: Chattering, perseveration, rapid speech, loud, incessant questioning, refusals to comply.
Response Techniques:Take threats seriouslyIncrease distanceEvacuate othersLook for escape routesMaintain non-threatening body languageStay calmFollow Crisis PlanCall for help
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Dr. Haim Ginott:Dr. Haim Ginott:
“I’ve come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. My personal approach creates the climate. My daily mood makes the weather. As a teacher I possess a tremendous power to make a child’s life miserable or joyous. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that dictates whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or dehumanized.”
“I’ve come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. My personal approach creates the climate. My daily mood makes the weather. As a teacher I possess a tremendous power to make a child’s life miserable or joyous. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that dictates whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or dehumanized.”
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How Meaning is ConveyedHow Meaning is Conveyed
7% is in words that are spoken.
38% of meaning is in the WAY words are spoken.
55% of the meaning is in facial expression.
7% is in words that are spoken.
38% of meaning is in the WAY words are spoken.
55% of the meaning is in facial expression.
38% 55%
7%
38% 55%
7%
2020
TriggersTriggers
Sensory
Situational
Transitions
Interpersonal
Time of day
Sensory
Situational
Transitions
Interpersonal
Time of day
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Categories of ReinforcementsCategories of Reinforcements
Social
Consumable
Activity
Manipulative
Exchangeable
Social
Consumable
Activity
Manipulative
Exchangeable
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Logical ConsequencesLogical Consequences
Teach, don’t punish
Related
Reasonable
Respectful
Teach, don’t punish
Related
Reasonable
Respectful
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Why Children ExplodeWhy Children Explode
Many children are not able to comply with expectations because of developmental delays. They lack the skills they need to be successful.
Many children are not able to comply with expectations because of developmental delays. They lack the skills they need to be successful.
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5 Steps to Problem Solving5 Steps to Problem Solving
Define the Problem
Brainstorm Alternatives
Choose a Solution
Obtain a Commitment
Evaluate the Results
Define the Problem
Brainstorm Alternatives
Choose a Solution
Obtain a Commitment
Evaluate the Results
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WHAT IS A GOOD SOLUTION?WHAT IS A GOOD SOLUTION?
Any solution that two parties agree is realistic, doable, and mutually satisfactory.
Any solution that two parties agree is realistic, doable, and mutually satisfactory.
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CRISIS PREVENTION PLANNING
CRISIS PREVENTION PLANNING
Takes place early in a case Considers child’s past and experiences Includes input from the child,
caseworker, and others involved in child’s care
Takes place early in a case Considers child’s past and experiences Includes input from the child,
caseworker, and others involved in child’s care
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AN EFFECTIVE CRISIS PLAN:AN EFFECTIVE CRISIS PLAN:
Is user-friendly Has clear directions Is individualized Is preventative Plans for real-life situations Is developed collaboratively Changes as the child/youth changes
Is user-friendly Has clear directions Is individualized Is preventative Plans for real-life situations Is developed collaboratively Changes as the child/youth changes
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RESOURCES - YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
RESOURCES - YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
Child’s Social Worker, therapist, doctor, psychiatrist, and other caregivers
DSHS emergency contact numbers Crisis Line phone numbers Other community resources 911
Child’s Social Worker, therapist, doctor, psychiatrist, and other caregivers
DSHS emergency contact numbers Crisis Line phone numbers Other community resources 911
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TAKE CARE OF YOURSELFTAKE CARE OF YOURSELF
Have a plan for self-care
If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of your children
Have a plan for self-care
If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of your children
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Self-CareSelf-Care
Stay in touch with supportive friends
Exercise
Use support groups
Keep a sense of humor
Forgive yourself
Stay in touch with supportive friends
Exercise
Use support groups
Keep a sense of humor
Forgive yourself
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“I have become clear about at least one
thing: self-care is never a selfish act - it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others. Anytime we can listen to true self and give it the care it requires, we do so not only for ourselves but for the many others whose lives we touch.”
Parker Palmer, Let Your Life Speak
“I have become clear about at least one
thing: self-care is never a selfish act - it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others. Anytime we can listen to true self and give it the care it requires, we do so not only for ourselves but for the many others whose lives we touch.”
Parker Palmer, Let Your Life Speak