سورة البقرة 15 صفر 1438

15.11.16

And if he has divorced her [for the third time], then she is not lawful to

him afterward until [after] she marries a husband other than him. And if the latter husband divorces

her [or dies], there is no blame upon the woman and her former husband

for returning to each other if they think that they can keep [within] the limits of Allah . These are the limits of Allah , which He makes clear to a

people who know.

The matter of divorce is not easy because it is a strong relationship which

is terminated. It is a contract which is made up of many rules. If you uphold the boundaries of Allah, it is smooth and easy.

If the husband divorces the wife for the third time, Allah will teach him a lesson, to break his transgression. He cannot misuse the authority Allah gave him. So another man will come and marry his wife.

The divorce procedure is very technical, so that no one can be unjust. In general, the oppressor is usually the one who has power and authority, and misuses it. Both the man and the woman can do injustice, the man by misusing his authority, and the woman by retaliating. When you don't do taqwa, the injustice and oppression will never stop. Allah will punish the

oppressor for sure, in dunya. This is سنة اهلل, the way of Allah. Injustice and oppression is a circle, if you do it, it will come back to you.

Allah hates oppression, there is no good in it. If you are unjust to someone, you and your children will suffer. If you see your children facing difficulties, look at yourself, are you being unjust to anyone? If you are truthful about reforming yourself, Allah will remind you of the wrong you did, so that you can repent. It will come before your eyes as a scene, so that you understand your mistake.

The chance of going back to the marriage is during the first and second declaration of divorce, the third declaration is final. He gets two chances, and if he persists in declaring it the third time, there is no return.

The Messenger of Allah صلى اهلل عليه : said وسلم

الظلم ظلمات يوم القيامة الراوي : عبداهلل بن عمر | املحدث : البخاري |

املصدر : صحيح البخاري الصفحة أو الرقم: 2447 | خالصة حكم املحدث :

[صحيح] | انظر شرح الحديث رقم 17169Oppression will turn into darkness on

the Day of Resurrection.

The Messenger of Allah صلى اهلل عليه وسلم said :

اتق دعوة املظلوم ، فإنها ليس بينها وبني اهلل حجاب

الراوي : عبداهلل بن عباس | املحدث : البخاري | املصدر : صحيح البخاري

الصفحة أو الرقم: 2448 | خالصة حكم املحدث : [صحيح] | انظر شرح الحديث رقم 13126

Be afraid, from the supplication of the oppressed as there is no screen between his

invocation and Allah. The Messenger of Allah صلى اهلل عليه وسلم reported it from his Lord, the Exalted and

Glorious :إني حرمت على نفسي الظلم وعلى عبادي فال

تظاملوا 2577d# صحيح مسلم ، حديث

Verily I have made oppression unlawful for Me and for My servants too, so do not

commit oppression.

The nature of women is that they are very fragile and is emotional, easily hurt. The wife will be heartbroken by this time, she will feel that her husband doesn't love her.

After the third time, the wife is no longer halal for the husband. She is no longer his wife. Allah makes the best rules. Now he can't have her back, unless they go through a long, complicated and painful

series of events. He lost his chance. She will now leave his house immediately, will not wait for the time persist of three menstrual cycles. Allah will enrich her with other means. We

must always think good of Allah. Allah will not leave her impoverished, though the situation points to this circumstance.

His wife is haram for him, even if he is willing to make a new contract. The husband may want her back now, but he can't have her anymore. It is usually his ego which makes him take such a drastic step in the first place. So this rule will break his ego, and teach him a lesson. Let someone else marry his wife, someone who is normal, with integrity. A normal person will not even tolerate another man looking at his wife, let alone touching her. It will reform the husband when he sees his former wife happily married to another man. She is now haram for him, and halal for the other man. This is His nurturing.

The woman will decide who to marry the second time, she will choose who to have a new relationship with. It cannot be according to a plan hatched by her former husband. It will be her desire to marry this new man. She cannot be marrying this man just so that she can get divorced and marry her former husband.

Remarriage may be a rare occurrence for her. She may be turned against men forever, due to the behavior of her former husband. For her to have another normal physical relationship with another man may not be possible. She would have to get married again, have a normal relationship, have problems with this husband, get divorced again, pass her iddah period, them would be able to marry her first husband. This would take many years, if ever. Another scenario is that she is widowed. If she goes through a contract marriage, and then remarries her former husband, they are both committing adultery.

This shows that you should be content with the first choice that Allah made for you, that is always the best. You must be patient, life is not perfect. The choice of Allah is not random, there is always a wisdom behind it. Change yourself, not others. Look at yourself, don't accuse others. Nurturing is not easy, but stay with it even when it is painful.

Your close friends and relatives are suitable for your reform, some are like a hammer on your head, some are like screwdrivers, or a saw, or a drill.

The Messenger of Allah صلى اهلل عليه وسلم said :

لعن اهلل املحلل واملحلل له سنن أبي داود ، حديث 2076#

Curse be upon the one who marries a divorced woman with the intention of

making her lawful for her former husband and upon the one for whom

she is made lawful.

If the present husband divorces her for some reason, then there is no sin if they both return to each other, after this life changing nurturing.

Allah doesn't even mention the second husband, only the first one is highlighted.

Appreciate everyone around you, and every situation you are in, because you don't know what wisdom is hidden behind it.