© 2015 All Rights Reserved ... · personal experience, and who can blame his bedmate? Lack of...


55 Habits of an Empowered Woman

Introduction

We give a lot of importance to becoming an empowered woman. For many of us who

have always felt an invisible weight pressing upon us to act in a certain way, to act like a

woman, it can sound heady. It is like the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow, and so we

strive hard and do everything so that we can feel empowered. We put our own

inclinations and plans on hold for a career so that others (especially men) look at us with

admiration and respect. However, is that what we really want?

What is empowerment? According to dictionary.com, empowerment is defined as “to

give power or authority to” and “to enable or permit.” Based on this definition, an

empowered woman is someone who has been permitted to wield authority. An

empowered woman has been given power. Permitted by whom? Given by whom? Why,

men, of course! Can a woman who barred from a college education or rejected for a

“man’s” job still feel empowered? Conventionally, no.

However, we say yes, of course! That is what this e-book is all about: feeling

empowered under our own terms. We are women, not men in skirts! Trying to compete

with men on their own turf is like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. We will

never fit in. Why would we want to, anyway?

The first thing we need to do to become an empowered woman is to remember that

women are NEVER going to be the equal of men. Men and women are like apples and

oranges; we are completely different from each other, and we have to play by our own

rules.

So how can you become an empowered woman? I would like to say that it is as simple

as self-acceptance, spiritual enlightenment, and personal development, but those are

just words to you right now, isn’t it? As Shakespeare said, it is all “sound and fury,

signifying nothing.”

These phrases mean nothing unless you can appreciate just how beautiful you really are.

After years of being told by our parents, teachers, peers, and the media what is beauty


and success, it will take some time to find the path to true empowerment. To true

power. For that, you have to get to a place where you can begin the path to self-

discovery. You can get there if you develop good habits of empowerment.

55 Habits of an Empowered Woman

1. Focus on yourself. Writer Nishan Panwar said, “Be a witness not a judge. Focus

on yourself, not on others. Listen to your heart, not to the crowd.” Each time

you wake up in the morning and when you are about to sleep at night, look

yourself fully in the mirror and find something to feel good about yourself. It

does not have to be much. It can be finding a particularly cute top on sale, or

the way your eyes tilt at the corners. It will make you feel good the whole day

and night.

2. Keep an open mind. You are a woman and you are strong! However, you are

not all-knowing. American inventor Charles Kettering put it quite clearly,

“There exist limitless opportunities in every industry. Where there is an open

mind, there will always be a frontier.” You should welcome new ideas, and

even consider all sides of old ones. You will be surprised at how liberating it

can be. It also makes you a much better conversationalist.

3. Get enough sleep. Writer Anthony Burgess grumbled that, “Laugh and the

world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.” This was probably from

personal experience, and who can blame his bedmate? Lack of sleep can make

you cranky and unproductive, and that is no way to achieve success. It can also

make you feel and look haggard so it becomes hard to feel good about

yourself.

4. Eat a healthy diet. Women usually go on diets to become thin and attractive

to men. Maybe that is why most of the time those diets do not work. You need

to eat right. As St Frances de Sales said, “The spirit cannot endure the body

when overfed, but, if underfed, the body cannot endure the spirit.” Eating a


healthy diet is a way for you to stay healthy and energized; doing that will help

you accomplish your goals.

5. Plan your day. Personal time management author Alan Lakein states it bluntly,

“Failing to plan is planning to fail.” You can get more done if you make a plan.

“Winging it” is just not the way to become empowered. Make sure to include

time for rest and some downtime.

6. Accept compliments. Mason Cooley was very right when he said that, “We are

prepared for insults, but compliments leave us baffled.” You have got to

accept compliments gracefully. False modesty is cheapening yourself and

other people. Acknowledge compliments on your looks, work, or other

accomplishments with a smile and a thank you.

7. Accept other people as they are. All people are unique. Expecting them to

conform to your idea of how they should be is precisely the kind of thinking

you are struggling against now. It would be a great irony if you expect other

people to accept you as you are when you are not prepared to reciprocate.

8. Surround yourself with people you admire. You should accept all people as

they are, but that does not mean you should try to be like them. The company

you keep is a great influence on your own thinking and behavior. Accepting

that other people can have an impact on you, and choosing the people to

spend your time with, is an important step in achieving control over your own

life.

9. Have goals. Without goals, you are aimless. As Zig Ziglar said “Lack of

direction, not lack of time, is the problem. We all have twenty-four hour days.”

Do not waste your time and energy on people and things that have no

meaning in your life. Discern what is important for you and keep your eye on

our goals at all times.


10. Delegate. Do not try to be everything to everyone, and do not try to do

everything yourself. You will exhaust yourself to no purpose and you will not

get anything done right. As Benjamin Franklin said, “Never confuse motion

with action.” Pick what you want and need to do, and let other people take on

the rest.

11. Believe you can. Go for what you want. As Henry Ford said, “Whether you

think you can, or you think you can't--you're right.” It is all on you. You cannot

win if you don’t try.

12. Have fun. Being an empowered woman does not mean you cannot be silly.

Let yourself go some of the time and be as outrageous as you want to be.

Former champion swimmer Debbie Meyers says, “Believe in yourself, not only

in swimming, but in life itself. You always have to have fun. You have to have

an open mind. If you're not enjoying it, don't do it. Life's too short.” Think of

them as cheat days.

13. Make your choices, and live with them. Theodore Roosevelt was quoted as

saying, ““If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your

trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month.” You have to take responsibility for your

life. Playing the blame game supports the notion that you have no power.

Empowered women take charge, and taking charge means making decisions

and standing by them. There is no such thing as having no choice in the

matter; you are always making a choice.

14. Be persistent. Author Stephen King said, “…you can, you should, and if you’re

brave enough to start, you will.” Do not give up. If you truly believe that

something can still work out, then keep at it.

15. Cut your losses. On the other hand, you should make a clear-eyed assessment

of situations that are just too far-gone to salvage. Far too many women (and

most people, for that matter) stay in a situation because they have already


invested time and effort into it, even if the case is hopeless. Do not waste any

more time and effort in trying to save it. Cut your losses and move on.

16. Learn from mistakes. No one is perfect, even women! Take failures and

disappointments in stride, and be grateful for them. They are valuable lessons

you need to learn on the road to success, and when you finally achieve it, your

past failures makes it all that much sweeter. More importantly, move past

them. Author Steve Maraboli puts it thus, ““We all make mistakes, have

struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes,

you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape

your day and your future.”

17. Learn something new every day. Make it part of your day to find out at least

one new thing, even if it is just a new word, or a new recipe.

18. Smile as much as you can. Don’t be stingy with the smiles, even if it is just at

someone who passes you the salt in the restaurant. A smile feels uplifting, it is

contagious, and it lights up your whole face. American motivational speaker

and writer Denis Waitley states, “A smile is the light in your window that tells

others that there is a caring, sharing person inside.” Don’t smile too wide for

no reason, though; that’s just creepy.

19. Focus on the good. There is no profit in self-pity. Moping over the bad things

that happen to you keeps you from moving on to other things. Whatever

happens, there is always a bright side. Look for it, and you will find that it will

lighten the load considerably.

20. Be kind. The Dalai Lama says, “Be kind whenever possible. It is always

possible.” There is a wealth of benefit in exercising kindliness. A nice

compliment, or a boost up a high ledge costs you nothing, and it makes you

feel good about yourself. It cannot hurt your reputation with the people

around you, either.


21. Enjoy each moment. Life is so short. Savor each second as if it is your last,

even if it is spent working on a project you hate. You will find that you do not

hate it as much as you thought.

22. Connect. Social networks have made it so easy to make new friends and

rekindle old ones. Take advantage and cultivate these relationships into

deeper ones. Reaching out can help you expand your horizons.

23. Engage. Small talk is fine for casual encounters, but find opportunities to have

meaningful conversations with your friends and colleagues. Always ask why or

why not. Challenging established beliefs in a constructive way can help you

develop your mind, and make you a more interesting person.

24. Be honest. Live a truthful life. You will find it spiritually uplifting to express

yourself as honestly as possible.

25. Be constructive. However, while the truth may set you free, it can hurt other

people. If telling the truth will not benefit anyone, keep it to yourself,

especially if it is only an opinion. Remember, truth is not fact. You may not

have all the information to form an accurate opinion.

26. Stick to your principles. Accept other people for what they are and what they

believe in, but remain true to your own principles. Do not be pressured into

doing things that you know is wrong. As Aristotle put it, “It is the mark of an

educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.”

27. Pay yourself first. One of the things that flight attendants tell you in an

emergency is to help yourself first before others. This is also true of life. If you

are not stable or secure, then you cannot help others. Make sure that you are

in a position of stability before giving to others. You do not want to get into a

position where you will need help yourself.


28. Ask. If there is something you want to know and something you want done,

do not be afraid to ask. Youth leader Israelmore Ayivor advises, “Be bold and

never feel shy to consult people. You may appear like a stupid person for few

minutes if you ask questions; but you are likely to be a fool forever if you don’t

ask at all.” The worst thing that will happen is that find out something new,

and you are denied. If you do not ask, you will not get anything.

29. Yield power. Do not be afraid to give others authority or power if they

deserve it. Successfully grooming others to take on positions of responsibility is

a sure sign of empowerment.

30. Say no. Refusing to do something you are not comfortable with or that is

against your principles is your prerogative. Do not let others pressure you into

saying yes.

31. Take time to meditate. It is easy to lose sight of the important things in your

life in the rush of daily life. This can lead you to neglect your family, your

health, and spiritual well-being. Make the time for meditation and reflection. If

your religious beliefs include seminars and retreats, that is a good way to keep

a connection with your spiritual side. If you can, include your family in your

meditations.

32. Live a balanced life. Do not forget your emotional needs. Firmly separate your

work and personal life, and make time to nurture your personal relationships.

33. Leave your ego behind. Not everything is about you, even as you strive

towards personal development. The people around you have needs, too. Pay

attention to what other people say, and be sensitive to their feelings.

34. Think of others. Be aware of how your actions and words can affect others.

An empowered woman has no need to put down anyone or bring down others

to get ahead. Carelessly or deliberately saying or doing something that will

hurt others is not a demonstration of power; it is a sign of insecurity.


35. Forgive quickly. Resentment and anger can eat you up from inside. Plutarch

said, “What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality.” Learn to let go of

your grievances ad you feel much lighter and freer. It does not matter if the

person who wronged you apologized; you should be more concerned with

getting rid of the bad feelings inside you. Forgiving someone is not to benefit

them, but to benefit you.

36. Solve problems. Make a point of being part of the solution, not the problem.

Avoid complaining about something if you cannot suggest a viable solution. If

there is a person or situation you do not like and cannot avoid, find a way to

tolerate it. Remember, tolerance is a virtue.

37. Inspire others. Always set a good example to others around you. What you

say or do should always make others compelled to do better. You may not

always be the bee’s knees, but others will see your sincere efforts to do your

best. That alone is enough to inspire others.

38. Be compassionate. It costs you nothing to give comfort to others in times of

trouble. You do not always have to have the right answers. Sometimes, all it

takes is a sympathetic ear and a shoulder to cry on to provide some relief.

39. Be patient. Some things come quickly and easily, while others take time. Do

not despair if something you want remains out of reach. Take it one step at a

time. You will get there eventually.

40. Be assertive. This is not the same as being pushy. You should make every

effort to get what you want, and sometimes this means asserting yourself and

your rights. As Mother Theresa says, “Do not wait for leaders; do it alone,

person to person.”

41. Pay for what you take. Do not expect a free ride. You have to work for what

you want, and this will cost you. Be prepared to pay for it.


42. Strive to be more. It can be tempting to rest on your laurels. You should not

let yourself stagnate, even if you are already successful in your work and

personal life. You have the potential to do more. Strive for the next level in

your life to continue your personal development. Consider taking up a hobby,

or join a fun run. Your continuing sense of accomplishment is incomparable.

43. Be decisive. Whenever you make a decision, avoid second-guessing yourself.

It does not matter whether your decision was right or not; entertaining doubts

is self-defeating.

44. Take charge of your finances. You should know how to handle your money.

Always be financially responsible, and be ready for emergencies.

45. Face your fears. We are all afraid of something, but that should not cripple us

in any way. Make an effort to expose yourself to your fears in manageable

increments. If you have a fear of talking in front of a crowd, join a club that can

teach you strategies for effective public speaking. If you have a fear of heights,

start with aerial yoga. Make it a practice to confront your fears head-on, and

pretty soon you will realize there is nothing to fear but fear itself.

46. Be self-sufficient. You don’t have to be Xena the Warrior Princess but you

should be able to do things for yourself. Playing the damsel in distress is to

stroke male egos, and some women find this a useful tactic. This is not playing

it straight, though, so think about what it will cost you.

47. Respect yourself. You cannot expect others to respect you if you do not

respect yourself. Always act and dress appropriately for the occasion, and

avoid negative attention. Have no part in an abusive relationship, in your work

or personal relationships. Nothing is worth sacrificing your self-respect.

48. Respect others. You get what you give. Accord others the respect they

deserve, and they will respect you as well. Value their privacy and accept their


personal preferences. Never argue about religious beliefs and political beliefs;

they have a right to theirs as you have to yours.

49. Love yourself. This may seem self-evident, but far too many women let the

opinion of others define their self-image. Strive to be well-groomed and

presentable at all times, but be happy in your own skin. Do not let others tell

you how you should look like or what you should wear. American actor and

media personality Willard Scott said, “Positive feelings come from being

honest about yourself and accepting your personality, and physical

characteristics, warts and all; and, from belonging to a family that accepts you

without question.”

50. Take on challenges. Welcome the opportunity to go outside your comfort

zone and do or try something new or hard. This will hone your skills and widen

your horizons.

51. Enjoy the journey. Inspirational author Greg Anderson says, ““Focus on the

journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in

doing it.” Life is a journey, not a destination. Far too many people concentrate

on getting somewhere and fail to appreciate the ride. You will miss a greater

part of your life. Enjoy it to the full, pitfalls and all.

52. Specialize in one thing. While you can be good in many things, you should be

excellent at something. This does not necessarily mean being the best in your

career. You could be the best bowler in your team, or bake the best apple pie

in your family.

53. Take pride in your work. Whatever you do, do the best that you can. This is a

reflection of your sense of self-worth. Mediocre work means a mediocre

person.


54. Value your time. Consider each minute of your time as precious. Do not waste

even one of it on worthless pursuits. There are so much you can do that is

worthwhile; you would be cheating yourself by wasting time.

55. Be graceful. You are never petty, disagreeable, or mean-spirited. You own up

to mistakes and apologize sincerely. You are generous with your smile, and

enjoyable company at all times. You leave only a trail of admiration behind

you. You are truly woman.

Digital Royalty founder and CEO Amy Jo Martin said, “Confidence and empowerment

are cousins in my opinion. Empowerment comes from within and typically it's stemmed

and fostered by self-assurance. To feel empowered is to feel free and that's when

people do their best work. You can't fake confidence or empowerment.”

Empowerment is not about what other people think or see. Empowerment is about

achieving all that you can through your own efforts and your own inclinations. True

empowerment is having the freedom to be who you want to be. Empowerment is a very

private thing, not a placard on an office door or testament to political correctness.

Empowerment is about being a genuine human being in total control of life.

To God be the glory!

© 2015 All Rights Reserved ... · personal experience, and who can blame his bedmate? Lack of...

Documents

Transcript of © 2015 All Rights Reserved ... · personal experience, and who can blame his bedmate? Lack of...