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W H E R E W A S I ?It’s the season for convivial companyand a glass of something warming,so join us on our armchair treasurehunt. Save letters from the answers;all bar the first contain seasonalwords. Glasses charged, we tacklethe first clue: “Festive lady? Book,published 1843. A city suburb (twowords, save letters five and seven)where the downtrodden clerk lived.”On to clue two. “Hark! I am 17

years old, wingspan 177ft, height 66ft(Four words, save the penultimateletter.)” Job done, we open the thirdclue. “Promenade south to a villagewhere a poet, born 1757, penned apoem (save the poem’s last letter).It formed part of the preface to abook and was set to music in 1916.”Much head-scratching later, we

open clue four. “Don’t panic! Deepand crisp and even: northeast to ahamlet (two words, letter one), 15miles west of which scenes for a

1970s sitcom were filmed.” Soon weare thinking about the fifth clue:“Merry men head north-northwest toa clifftop village (three words, letterfour). It’s five miles southeast of alarger town (fangs for the memory).”Clue six: “Conflagratory street (twowords, letter eight) where September2 is burnt in history.” Easy.Next: “Prickly-sounding capital

suburb street (letter two) wherean artist, born 1734, lived. Worksinclude The Ambassadress.” Clueeight: “A tad southwest: riversidesuburb, and a brief encounter witha playwright (Christian name, letterthree). He was born there; charactersinclude Nicky Lancaster.” Now forthe final instruction. “Rearrangeyour nine letters to find one lastChristmassy feature. It could growon you (but not literally, I hope).”

Chris Fautley

T H E Q U E S T I O N S

T H E P R I Z E

1 What is the name of the hamlet?2 What is the ‘last Christmassy feature’?

LAST WEEK’S PRIZEThe answers are Clandon Park andDame Margaret Helen Greville.Carol Whitehead of Gloucestershirewins a Mediterranean cruise for two,as a guest of MSC Cruises.

The winner and a guest will spendthree nights, on a B&B basis, at thefive-star Isle of Eriska Hotel, on thewest coast of Scotland. Set on aprivate 300-acre island at the mouthof Loch Creran, in Argyll, thiscountry-house hotel is a beautifuland fascinating place: home tootters, roe deer, badgers and herons,and the site of a Bronze Age islandhouse called a crannog. The loch’sbiogenic reefs are of internationalscientific importance.The house dates from 1884, and

facilities include a spa and the Isleof Eriska Hotel Restaurant, whichwas awarded a Michelin star for thesecond year running in 2015. Twodinners for two, excluding drinks,are included in the prize. For moredetails, or to book, call 01631 720371or visit eriska-hotel.co.uk.The prize must be taken between

February 1 and June 1, 2016,

excluding public holidays andValentine’s Day. It is subject toavailability.

HOW TO ENTEROnly one entry per person, via ourwebsite — thesundaytimes.co.uk/wherewasi— byWednesday. NormalTimes Newspapers rules apply. Nocorrespondence will be entered into.

Win a Michelin-starredbreak in Scotland

WITH THE ISLE OF ERISKA HOTEL

One of my favourite places isCartagena. It has a reputationfor violence. We went up therewhile I was on operations in thesouth of Colombia. We werecarrying — we had to be. It’sfunny, you can always tell people

who’ve got guns and are doing it for aliving, because they’re all sitting there,but no one is drinking alcohol. Diet Coke,ginger beer. That sort of thing.I remember we got a discount in the

Hilton because, while we were there,the top two floors were blown up. But it’san amazing place. I like history, andthere are these fortifications going backto the time of Sir Francis Drake.We didn’t do holidays when I was

growing up. Summer just meant hangingaround the estate in Bermondsey where

I was brought up, with maybe the oddtrip to Margate. I had a mate on the estatewhose family went to Spain one year,and we thought they must be the richestpeople on earth. His dad had a car lot.We all decided that when we left school,we wanted to sell second-hand cars,because, clearly, then you could affordto get to Spain. Wherever that was.I’m not as good at surfing as I’d like

to be. I’ve done a couple of competitionsin Costa Rica over the years. NormallyI get to the third round, then get beatenby a 14-year-old called Jake or Zac. Mybiggest wave? Portugal, about 12ft. Idon’t go in for all that spiritual stuff,but there’s a moment, you know, wheneverything just clicks. I really understandhow people can take it up as a lifestyle.Flying’s fantastic. You get to veg out.

It definitely feels good when I’m on aplane and I see someone reading one ofmy books. Sometimes, I’m looking to

John

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Surfing 12ft waves and sightseeing in crimehotspots gives him a buzz — but not as muchas watching people read his books on planes

Andy McNab

What happened in Paris wasshocking. If somethinghappened and I was closeenough, I’d definitely intervene

see what page they’re on and trying tosee if there’s a funny bit coming up, tosee if they smile. Many times, I’ve beentempted to tap them on the shoulder.Some people deride my books as airport

thrillers. I take that as a compliment —all that matters is that people areenjoying them. There’s definitely a bit ofsnobbery about books in the UK. Whenyou’ve sold 32m books, mate, then we’lldiscuss it. That’s what I always think.With my history with the SAS, I’ve got

to be quite sensible where I travel thesedays. I won’t be running off to Baghdadfor a weekend break. I travel under myactual name; Andy McNab is a pseudonymI came up with for my first book.If there’s an opportunity to travel, I feel

guilty if I don’t take it. That’s howmy trekto the South Pole thing came up. A matewas going and I said, “Yeah, why not?”It was difficult, though, because one ofmy mates wanted to climb Mount Vinsonwhile there, and I find mountain climbingboring. Thankfully, he’s broken his leg.What happened in Paris was shocking.

If something similar happened and I wasclose enough, then, yeah, I’d definitelyfeel obliged to intervene. If you’re closeenough to do something, you’re closeenough to get shot. What stops a lot ofpeople is this sense of disbelief.The books mean I’ve made a few quid,

definitely. It means you can get stuff anddo things — but we try to keep thingssensible. Me and a couple of mates got aprivate jet lease a few years ago.That was fantastic. We’d bouncearound in the jet, going to theStates. I love those VIP terminals.But after about three years,

it all got a bit too much. Afterthat, we thought, “F*** it, let’sgo Virgin.”

Andy McNab is aformer SAS sergeantturned bestsellingauthor whose accountof his exploits duringthe Gulf War, BravoTwo Zero, was a hitworldwide. This month,he is trekking to theSouth Pole in aid ofthe Reading Agency’s#ReadingJourneyappeal (readingagency.org.uk/readingjourneyappeal). Hislatest thriller,Detonator (BantamPress £18.99), is outnow. He lives withhis wife in Londonand New York

My hols

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While Cadbury’s US ownersare messing not onlywith our Creme Eggs,but with our tax system,

Belgium continues to produce thefinest chocolate on earth.

They’ve been making the stuffthere since 1663, and in 1884, a lawdecreeing that the Belgian brown stuffshould contain at least 35% cocoasealed the country’s reputation as thesource of the world’s purest chocolate.

The best is sold in Brussels, wherethere are more than 500 chocolatiersat work. Given enough time, andself-repairing teeth, you could trythe output of each and every one in

order to arrive at your own opinionof which makes the best, but that’san impossible dream.

At master chocolatiers such asLaurent Gerbaud (chocolatsgerbaud.be) or Van Dender (vandender.eu),you’ll be enticed by pharmaceutical

displays of pralines and ganaches.The former — invented by JeanNeuhaus in 1912 — comprises achocolate shell with a nut-based softcentre, ranging from marzipan tomore challenging blends flavouredwith pink pepper or cardamom.

The ganaches are even moretantalising, using lemon and freshginger or saffron-infused Ecuadorianchocolate cream.

The true chocoholic,however, doesn’t needthese fancy distractions.They need the hard stuff— pure cocoa butter cutwith a lecithin (naturalfat) — and it’s on saleat Pierre Marcolini(marcolini.be). Pierre buysbeans direct from the growers.His shop looks like a Prada outlet, hisproduce like jewellery. (He has storesin London, too — but that would be

cheating.) Go for the Grand CruCarré² tablets, nine squares ofsingle-varietal dark chocolate so

intense, you might need to liedown after a nibble.

The most remarkable isthe Mexican, made fromCriollo porcelana beansfrom the Finca de la Joyaestate, in Tabasco,Mexico. Or it might be theVenezuelan Chuao, created

with the most expensivebeans on earth. Make up your

own mind. A pack of four costs £35.

Chris Haslam

OBJECTS OF DESIREWHAT TO BRING BACK FROM YOUR TRAVELS# 1 4 B E L G I A N C H O C O L A T E