Post on 07-Jan-2016
description
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Top Ten Stinkin Thinkin, Plus One
Ten attitudes to keep you stuck(and some challenges to consider)
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1. We’re too different; incompatible
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Challenge # 1
Find ways to make your differences enhance your relationship, instead of using them as reasons to avoid intimacy.
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2. We need quality time, not
quantity time
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Challenge # 2
There is no quality time without quantity time; it’s up to you to make the time.
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3. The program doesn’t work for us
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Challenge # 3
That’s right. The program doesn’t work for you. You have to do the work. How often do you dialog? Attend CORE?
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There’s too much water over the dam
(So much has happened that we can’t recover.)
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Challenge # 4
Yesterday is history,
Tomorrow is mystery,
Today is a gift.
That’s why we call it the present.
Your future starts today if you so choose.
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5. I’m doing my best; he/she isn’t
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Challenge # 5
Every self-built cage
is built with bars of blame.
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6. When he/she changes, I’ll change
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Challenge # 6
If you don’t like what you have,
why are you protecting it
by refusing to change?
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7. Marriage should be fun, not work.
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Challenge # 7
Marriage is not a free lunch.
Want fulfillment?
Do your work.
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8. This is hopeless until he/she changes
I’m helpless to do anything about it.
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Challenge # 8Challenge # 8
No matter how stubborn he/she is,
your hopelessness is because
you haven’t learned what to do, or
you refuse to change in ways that offer hope.
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9. If I feel this bad, my marriage must be this bad
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Challenge # 9
If you feel so bad that you have become despairing, ask yourself what irrational judgments you are making that lead you to give up.
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10. Rebuilding this marriage will take more effort than it
is worth.
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Challenge # 10
How much effort is “too much” for a fulfilling life? You can’t reap what you don’t sow and nurture.
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Bonus item
We’ve done the Weekend and Post - now we can coast.
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Bonus Challenge
Have you ever noticed that you can’t coast for very long, unless you’re going downhill?