Intergenerational Befriending

4th March 2015

“Befriending is a relationship between a trained volunteer and an isolated or lonely individual (befriendee), which is initiated, supported and monitored by a voluntary or statutory agency”

Definition of befriending

Befriending is … (yes / no / maybe)

1. Just like friendship

2. A way to provide respite for the befriendee’s

carer

3. Focused mainly on building a good relationship

between the befriender and the befriendee

4. Giving advice to befriendees about lifestyle and

behaviour

Befriending and friendship

Befriending involves creating and maintaining a personal relationship, so

there are obviously elements of friendship

present in a befriending relationship.

Befriending and friendship

However, there are important differences. Whilst

friendly, it is a professional relationship governed by

boundaries and carried out in line with the outcomes of the supervising organisation.

It’s all about the relationship

The relationship itself is the main focus of a befriending

relationship. This is why good communication skills and an open, empathic attitude are

the most important characteristics of a befriender.

Giving advice

Befrienders and coordinators of

befriending services often provide useful information about

health and lifestyle to befriendees if

requested.

Giving advice

However, this is very different from giving advice and it is not part of the befriender’s role to give advice about any aspect of

lifestyle or behaviour even if they are an expert in that field

in their professional life.

Befriending is … (yes / no / maybe)

5. Focused on supporting the befriendee to reach

certain goals

6. The key to solving all the befriendee’s problems

7. Giving help with practical tasks and problems

8. About the befriender as much as about the

befriendee

Befriending and goals

Befriending is about the relationship and the quality of the time spent together. Many

personal goals may be achieved as a result of the increased confidence and wellbeing

which this relationship brings …

Befriending and goals

… and befrienders can be instrumental in supporting

befriendees to resolve practical issues, BUT these

are all essentially a by-product of the relationship

itself.

The scope of befriending

Befriending can have a powerful positive impact on the life of an

isolated or lonely person, but it is important not to make promises which are either too wide or too

specific to be realistically fulfilled.

Befriending and the befriender

It is essential that the relationship is right for the

befriender too. Coordinators need to check in regularly with

befrienders to make sure they’re happy with how things are

going.

Befriending is … (yes / no / maybe)

9. An informal way of providing counselling or

therapy

10. Providing a relationship that others in the

client’s life can not

11. Something a befriendee can turn to in an

emergency

12. Something which essentially only involves two

people – the befriender and the befriendee

Befriending is unique

Befriending services work with people who lack

meaningful informal social relationships. The essential

support they provide is usually not available to

befriendees in any other form.

Not an emergency service

Befriending is a long-term, preventative intervention.

Though befrienders need to be trained on how to respond

should an emergency arise while they are with their befriender ….

Not an emergency service

… organisations must make it clear to befriendees and

befrienders alike that befrienders are not

there to be called upon I an emergency.

Models of befriending delivery

Face-to-face:

1:1

Groups

Distance:

Telephone

Email / letter

Intergenerational Projects:

Residential setting

Befrienders in groups

???

The future of befriending is waiting to be written!

Delivery models

WELLBEING

WELLBEING

Starting Up

• Location, Location, Location

• Appropriate time to run sessions

• Staff time

• Volunteer Supervisor

• Abilities

WELLBEING

Recruiting young people

• Good contact within

school

• Talking at assembly

or in class

• School magazine

• Posters

WELLBEING

Training

• Perceptions

• Confidentiality

• Boundaries

• Dementia

• Dilemmas

WELLBEING

1st Session

Getting to know each

other: Badge Making

• Interests

• Skills

• Abilities

WELLBEING

The aim is never the activity but always a smile!

• Talking

• Listening

• Laughing

• Touch

WELLBEING

Planning a programme

• Use peoples interests

• Use peoples skills and talents

• Alter activities depending on group

WELLBEING

Project Evaluation

• After every session

• After every block

/term

• Quotes

WELLBEING

Activities

• Seasonal

• Themed

• Using every sense

WELLBEING

Benefits

• Residents

• Young people

• Staff

• Families

WELLBEING

WELLBEING

WELLBEING

WELLBEING

WELLBEING

WELLBEING

WELLBEING

WELLBEING

The benefits of befriending

Increased confidence and self-esteem

Increased involvement with communities

More able to manage challenges of everyday life

The benefits of befriending

More cohesive and integrated communities communities

Less pressure on health and social care services

Reductions in rates of crime, homelessness, substance abuse and suicide

The benefits of intergenerational befriending

Greater communication and understanding between young and old

Befrienders learn skills from past they have no other way of learning about. They impart ‘modern’ skills which will be useful to the befriendee

Befriendees enjoy knowing that their skills and knowledge are appreciated. They gain practical knowledge of of new skills

Discussion questions

What might be the benefits to your client group of developing an

intergenerational befriending project?

What do you think would be the main challenges facing your

organisation in developing an intergenerational project? What

resources would you need to overcome them?

What three actions could you take in the next month towards the

development of an intergenerational befriending project?

Intergenerational Befriending

www.befriending.co.ukwww.strive.me.uk