Post on 02-Nov-2014
description
STOP ASSUMING, START ASKING QUESTIONS:HOW TO TURN CONFLICT INTO
COLLABORATION
@penny_walker_sd
Get interested in the grey areas.
Both sides needed to win.
Positions
Interests
Needs
Common ground
Position
Interest
Need
I swapped my placards for post-it notes.
Listen
Listening is not the same as waiting to speak.
Reflect
Clarify
Really useful questions:
What do you want to see?
Can you tell me more about that?
What would that give you?
What do you want to achieve, that this could help you with?
Not really questions:
Have you thought about doing this instead?
What kind of dumb idea is that?
You haven’t really thought this through, have you?
It’s not helpful to rescue people.
Position
Interest
Need
We move from conflict to collaboration when we listen louder to the things we don’t
understand; when we move away from being right, towards the
uncomfortable truths.
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penny-walker.co.uk/blog
@penny_walker_sd
Picture creditsThames Barrier – author’s own library, copyright unknown. If this is your picture please get in touch. Bottle – author’s own library, copyright unknown. If this is your picture please get in touch. Recycled paper – http://www.flickr.com/photos/bobydimitrov/3425851037/sizes/l/ Water pollution – http://www.flickr.com/photos/paolotonon/334402074/sizes/l/ Recycling truck – http://www.flickr.com/photos/naturewise/5528657845/sizes/l/ Diesel pump – http://www.flickr.com/photos/12495774@N02/8332832613/sizes/l/Castle – http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ACastillo_de_los_Mendoza_-_Manzanares_el_Real_-_Madrid_-_Espa%C3%B1a.jpgWorkshop leaves / branches – Dialogue by Design / Sustainable Development Commission.Workshop people – Helen Fisher / SciencewisePlacards – http://www.flickr.com/photos/jamesm/23059398/sizes/o/ Post-its on better meetings – Author’s own / Sustainable Development CommissionHeadphones – http://www.flickr.com/photos/abrinsky/3754792367/sizes/l/Glasses - http://www.flickr.com/photos/halcyon/98048815/sizes/o/Question mark – http://www.flickr.com/photos/bilal-kamoon/6835060992/sizes/l/ Medmerry – The Environment Agency http://www.flickr.com/photos/environment-agency/10687636194/sizes/l/ Insulation – http://www.flickr.com/photos/cseeman/2614836996/sizes/l/Light bulbs – http://www.flickr.com/photos/mncerts/6882037149/sizes/l/ Polar vortex – http://www.flickr.com/photos/hawkinsdigital/11920649743/sizes/l/Flood http://www.flickr.com/photos/usgeologicalsurvey/2594326010/sizes/o/ Aral Sea http://www.flickr.com/photos/teosaurio/9121875591/sizes/l/ Scream – http://www.flickr.com/photos/salforduniversity/4055512146/sizes/o/Walk – David Caines / Penny WalkerBook jacket – DoSustainability / Sedition Publishing