Post on 05-Aug-2020
5/11/2017
1
Sexy New Science on The Art of
Loving Relationships
Todd B. Kashdan
Professor of Psychology
Senior Scientist, Center for the Advancement of Well-Being
Director, The Well-Being Lab
George Mason University
Email: tkashdan@gmu.edu
Web: toddkashdan.com
0
20
40
60
80
100
United
States
Yes No
(Levine, Sato, Hashimoto, & Verma, 1995)
If a man (woman) had all the other qualities you desired,
would you marry them (commit) if you were not in love?
____ Yes ____ No ____ Undecided
50%
55%
60%
65%
70%
75%
%“Very Happy” in the Marriage
General Social Survey
5/11/2017
2
Sex Partner
Therapist
Nurse/Doctor
Emotional Need Fulfiller
Domestic Laborer
Cheerleader
Teacher/Student
Resource
Provider
Family Coordinator
Best Friend
Pain point
Needs met
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3
0
20
40
60
80
100
120
Courage
Good Stuff
What assumptions guide
your thoughts on strengths?0
20
40
60
80
100
120
140
160
Courage
Good Stuff
5/11/2017
4
Partner Strength
Questionnaire
Appreciation of Partner
Strength Use
Perceived Costs of Partner
Strength Use
Partner Big Five Traits
CapitalizationSupport
Partner VIAstrengths
RelationshipLength
StrengthUse
What are your
goals, dreams,
aspirations?
I will…
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5
Partner Big Five Traits
CapitalizationSupport
Partner VIAstrengths
RelationshipLength
StrengthUse
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Appreciation of
Partner Strength
Use
Perceived Cost of
Partner Strength Use
• Less accepting of
partner behavior
• Lack of
belonging,
competence, &
autonomy
• Intimacy
• Self-expansion
• Greater goal
support
• Frequency and
acceptability of
partner behavior
A Note on Independence…
-.21
-.11
-.22
5/11/2017
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Questions?
Beefs?
Insights?
Email: tkashdan@gmu.edu
Twitter: @toddkashdan
Web: toddkashdan.com