Emotional Intelligence A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success

Sarah Schlosser, Executive Director, Leadership Wisconsin,

University of Wisconsin-Extension

Wisconsin Association of Local Health Departments and Boards, 2018 Operations Conference, Wisconsin Dells

Our Objectives:

Understand what emotional intelligence is

and why it is important for leadership success.

Identify components of emotional intelligence

and strategies to enhance your personal

emotional intelligence.

Identify the benefits of developing emotional

intelligence skills among teams, and resources to

accomplish this.

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

Emotional Intelligence Using emotional information to guide thinking and

behavior

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

“

”

I've learned that people will

forget what you said, people will

forget what you did, but people

will never forget how you made

them feel.

Maya Angelou

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

Feelings as Messengers

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

Emotion Message Action

5 Core Categories of Feelings

***From Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves

Intensity of Feelings Happy Sad Angry Afraid Ashamed

High

Elated

Excited

Overjoyed

Thrilled

Exuberant

Ecstatic

Fired Up

Passionate

Depressed

Agonized

Alone

Hurt

Dejected

Hopeless

Sorrowful

Miserable

Furious

Enraged

Outraged

Boiling

Irate

Seething

Loathsome

Betrayed

Terrified

Horrified

Scared Stiff

Petrified

Fearful

Panicky

Frantic

Shocked

Sorrowful

Remorseful

Defamed

Worthless

Disgraced

Dishonored

Mortified

Admonished

Medium

Cheerful

Gratified

Good

Relieved

Satisfied

Glowing

Heartbroken

Somber

Lost

Distressed

Let Down

Melancholy

Upset

Mad

Defended

Frustrated

Agitated

Disgusted

Apprehensive

Frightened

Threatened

Insecure

Uneasy

Intimidated

Apologetic

Unworthy

Sneaky

Guilty

Embarrassed

Secretive

Low

Glad

Contented

Pleasant

Tender

Pleased

Mellow

Unhappy

Moody

Blue

Upset

Disappointed

Dissatisfied

Perturbed

Annoyed

Uptight

Resistant

Irritated

Touchy

Cautious

Nervous

Worried

Timid

Unsure

Anxious

Bashful

Ridiculous

Regretful

Uncomfortable

Pitied

Silly

Seven Ways to Make People Feel Important

1. Accept people the way they are

2. Show your appreciation for others

3. Be agreeable

4. Show your admiration

5. Pay attention to others

6. Never criticize, condemn or complain

7. Be courteous, concerned and considerate

Source: Zwilling, Marty. HuffPost Blog. 08/17/2010 - https://www.huffingtonpost.com/marty-zwilling/seven-ways-

to-make-people_b_684768.html

Components of Emotional Intelligence

Personal

Competence

Social

Competence

Relationship

Management Social

Awareness

Self-

Awareness

Self-

Management

What I Do What I See

***From Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves

Self-Awareness The ability to accurately perceive your own

emotions in the moment and understand your

tendencies across situations.

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

PERSONAL COMPENTENCE

WHAT I SEE...

Self-Management The ability to use your awareness of your emotions

to stay flexible and direct your behavior positively.

This means managing your emotional reactions to

situations and people.

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

PERSONAL COMPENTENCE

WHAT I DO...

Social Awareness The ability to accurately pick up on emotions in

other people and understand what is going on with

people.

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

SOCIAL COMPENTENCE

WHAT I SEE...

Relationship Management The ability to use your awareness of your own

emotions and those of others to successfully

manage interactions.

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

SOCIAL COMPENTENCE

WHAT I DO...

Self-Awareness The ability to accurately perceive your own

emotions in the moment and understand your

tendencies across situations.

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

honing my skills..

• Monitor your feelings

• Stop and ask yourself "Why?"

• Visit your values

Self-Management The ability to use your awareness of your emotions

to stay flexible and direct your behavior positively.

This means managing your emotional reactions to

situations and people.

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

• Refocus your thinking

• Find someone not emotionally

invested

• Mental recharge in your schedule

honing my skills..

Social Awareness The ability to accurately pick up on emotions in

other people and understand what is going on with

people.

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

• Watch body language

• Go people watching

• Step into their shoes

honing my skills..

Relationship Management The ability to use your awareness of your own

emotions and those of others to successfully

manage interactions.

Emotional Intelligence: A Cram Course in Personal and Interpersonal Success – Schlosser, 2018

• Don't avoid the inevitable

• Explain your decisions, don't just make

them

• When you care, show it

honing my skills..

General Resources:

Six Emotional Leadership Styles (MindTools article)

Emotional Agility (HBR article)

“Primal Leadership”, Daniel Goleman

15 Websites that Will Make Your Emotional

Intelligence Better

"Emotional Intelligence 2.0", Bradberry and Greaves

"The Emotional Intelligence Quick Book", Bradberry

and Greaves

"Emotional Intelligence for Managing Results in a

Diverse World", Gardenswartz, Cherbosque, Rowe

Self-Awareness:

5 Ways to Become More Self-Aware (HBR Article)

How to Develop Self-Awareness (Pyschology Today article)

“True North: Discover Your Authentic Leadership”, Bill George

Self-Management: How To Make Stress Your Friend (15 minute TEDTalk)

Why We All Need to Practice Emotional First Aid (18 minute

TEDTalk)

Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are (21 minute TEDTalk)

Social Awareness:

The Ultimate Guide to Body Language (Psychology Today

article)

Active Listening (MindTools article)

Relationship Management: 10 Ways Effective Leaders Build Trust (Psychology Today

article)

9 Habits of People Who Build Extraordinary Relationships (Inc

article)

“How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie

Emotional Culture:

Why good leaders make you feel safe (12 minute

TEDTalk)

Manage Your Emotional Culture (HBR Article)

Quantifying Your Company’s Emotional Culture

(HBR Article)

Tribal Leadership (17 minute TEDTalk)

Thank You! Sarah Schlosser, Executive Director, Leadership Wisconsin, University of Wisconsin-Extension

sarah.schlosser@ces.uwex.edu

(608) 263-0817