CREATING SPACEStudent Care Through The Lens of Hospitality

Hospitality Defined

“…generous space for others in our midst, created for their benefit at our expense.”

Tim Keel

Hospitality Reflection Think of a story of hospitality that you’ve

experienced. Write an overview of that story

How did you feel? How was space created for you? How were you changed/ affected? What did someone give for your benefit?

Hospitality and Higher Education

Purpose of Higher Education

“a constellation of encounters, both planned and unplanned, that promote growth through the acquisition of knowledge, skills, understanding and appreciation”

Noddings, 2002

Culture of Higher Education

Fear • “Fear of the live encounter” (Palmer, 1998)Transactio

nal Relationsh

ips

• Consumer culture. “I’ll scratch your back, you scratch mine.”

Fear

Fear of the Live Encounter“We collaborate with the structures of separation [in our institutions or with our students] because they promise to protect us against one of the deepest fears at the heart of being human – the fear of having a live encounter with alien ‘otherness,’ whether the other is a student, colleague, a subject, or a self-dissenting voice within… . We want those encounters on our own terms, so that we can control their outcomes, so that they will not threaten our view of world and self.”

Palmer, 1998

Fear of the Live Encounter“Academic institutions offer myriad ways to protect ourselves from the threat of a live encounter. To avoid a live encounter with teachers, students can hide behind their notebooks and their silence. To avoid a live encounter with students, teachers can hid behind their podiums, their credentials, their power. To avoid a live encounter with one another, faculty can hide behind their academic specialities.”

Palmer, 1998

Fear hinders hospitality.

Assume students are only what we see. Hold them at a distance.

Students

Care more about image than a real encounter.

Teachers Objectiv

e based and truth only comes at a distance.

Way of Knowi

ng

Hospitality as a deeper knowing.

Understan-ding the fear with the students’ hearts.

Students Offering

hospitality to prevent stagnation and experience mutual benefit.

Teachers

“Knowing is always communal.”(Palmer, 1998)

Way of Knowi

ng

Transactional Relationships

Ethic of Care (Noddings, 2002)

“Attentive” “Receptive” Being impacted “Motivational

displacement”

“Recognized”Carer Cared-for

Creating space for others Generous space for others in our

midst, created for their benefit at our expense

Defining Hospitality

Creating Space Cloister: time alone Community: time with loved ones Hospitality: time with the “other”

Balance Cloister without community and

hospitality is isolation. Community without cloister and

hospitality is comfort. Hospitality without cloister and

community is duty.

Creating Space For self: past, experiences, prejudices Thorough: hearts, minds, homes,

offices, schedules

Radical Hospitality“Hospitality is the overflowing of a heart that has to share what it has received. It takes a whole person to open up, it takes a secure person to be available, it takes a strong person to give yourself away.”

Homan & Pratt, 2002

Who is the other? Grating personality Different political views Different religious views No chemistry

Generous Space“What I believe is the basic impulse of

hospitality: generous space for others in our midst, created for their benefit at our

expense…” (Keel)

What are the spaces you are in that can be more generous?

Generous SpacesPhysical Space

Office, classroom, homeSpace in schedule

Create time for othersAllow for InterruptionsSet aside agendasAdapt to the needs of others

Generous Spaces continued

Emotional and Mental Space Are your words hospitable? Do you listen well? Meet others where they are at

“Listening is always involved in hospitality. The most gracious attempts we can muster are meaningless if we do not actually hear the stranger. Listening is the core meaning of hospitality. Its something we can give anyone and everyone, including ourselves. It takes only a few minutes to really listen.” (Homan & Pratt, 2002)

Both Internal and External Internal

Are we prepared to welcome others, to listen, to be interrupted, and to be patient? Why do we hold back? What work do we need to do internally to be

prepared to welcome others?

Both Internal and External Continued

External Are our actions hospitable? How do we welcome others into our space?

Body Language Words Physical Space

Hospitality- an idea that changes you

“Hospitality, rather than being something you achieve, it is something you enter. It is an adventure that takes you where you never dreamed of going. It is not something you do, as much as it is someone you become. You try and you fail. You try again. You make room for one person at a time, you give one chance at a time, and each of these choices of the

heart stretches your ability to receive others. This is how we grow more hospitable- by welcoming one

person when the opportunity is given to you.”Homan & Pratt, 2002

Hospitality and Mutuality

“If we desire the mutuality, trust and respect that are basic to the meaning of

friendship, then we have to be very careful to resist seeing people primarily in terms of what they or we can offer or provide.”

Huertz & Pohl, 2010

We can find mutuality with people who are different than us “Mutuality does not come from everyone

doing the same thing or making the same contributions. It comes from shared humility, respect and appreciation for the other person, and some sense of shared vision or purpose.” (Huertz & Pohl, 2010)

Mutuality continued Learning from others Less hierarchical Embracing the other Learning from the other Mutual reverence (Homan & Pratt, 2002)

Hospitality and Vulnerability

Allowing someone to bring all of who they are into your interaction

Risking how someone will receive you “I spent a lot of years trying to outrun or

outsmart vulnerability by making things certain and definite, black and white, good and bad. My inability to lean in to the discomfort of vulnerability limited the fullness of those important experiences that are wrought with uncertainity. Love, belonging, trust, joy and creativity to name a few. (Brown)

Vulnerability continued

Letting people into the imperfectness of home

Into a life lived out sincerely- not on a pedestal

Open-handed

Enemies of Hospitality Suspicion

“Fear is at the core of suspicion” (Homan & Pratt, 2002)

Narcissism “We make commodities of people, consuming

them for our personal enrichment and happiness. It’s common in our culture. The other’s only purpose is what he or she can do for us. For many, the only thing that matters is what works for them. There is a kind of contempt in this utilitarian view of others.” (Homan & Pratt, 2002)

Stories of Hospitality

The Table“But someone has to make a meal happen. Someone must consider it important enough to give themselves to the work that goes into preparation. Setting a table and making ready for a meal involves preliminary thought and consideration for others. To do it right, you have to think through your guests’ preferences and history; you need to know if they have allergies or chronic illnesses. If you invite more than one guest you must consider which of them would enjoy sitting together and how they might relate. Preparing for another pulls us out of ourselves – that is one of the good gifts of hospitality.”

Homan & Pratt, 2002

Tables in Our Daily Lives Meetings with students Meetings with colleagues Board room Meals Who do we need to invite?