Post on 06-Jun-2018
Objectives
• Define self-esteem.
• Describe how self-esteem develops.
• Explain how media messages can affect one’s self-esteem.
• Assess your own self-esteem.
• Name the best way to raise self-esteem.
• Name at least three other ways of raising your self-esteem.
• Make a plan to improve your own self-esteem.
Self-Esteem
Self-esteem: pride in and acceptance of yourself; sense of personal worth.
Self-esteem Influences:
- relationships w/family, friends, teachers, bosses.
- School
- Work
- Self
Development
• Development begins at birth.
• Reflection of we are treated by important people (parents, guardians, people seen frequently…)
• You see yourself as what you think they think of you.
Development
Sometimes people…
don’t say what they mean.
unaware of interpretation what is said.
are influenced by outside source.
NOTE: most parents would not intentionally hurt
your self-esteem.
Development
There are more serious situations…
– Neglect/abuse verbally.
– Neglect/abuse isolation.
– Neglect/abuse physically.
WHAT DO YOU DO?
Neglect/Abuse
Either you or someone you know being abused?
• Talk to a teacher, counselor, principle, coach, pastor, another trusted adult, etc.
Department of Human Service (DHS)
Development
• Within the first years of life, you have decided on your self-esteem.
• May not be a conscience decision, but it is a decision.
• Self-fulfilling Prophecy
• Decision Thoughts/beliefs Reality
Answer
Decision Thoughts/beliefs Reality
It all starts with a decision.
Think Back:
What is your greatest asset?
Answer
THE POWER OF CHOICE:
In any situation you always have a choice. With each decision you make, you must be willing to accept the consequences, both good and bad. If you don’t want to accept the consequences, make a different choice.
It is called “SELF-esteem” for a reason!
Continued Development
Body Image: a persons perception of his or her
appearance, level of fitness, and health.
Difficult for Teens:
1. Constant body changes
2. Media Portrayals
3. Standards of Beauty Change Frequently
The Mullet
• Popular in the 1960’s
• Very popular in the 1980’s – early 1990’s.
• Again popular in the early 2000’s (retro look)
Media Portrayals
HANDOUT:
Body Dysmorphic Disorder Article
CNN - 2/2/2010
Read Individually – 5 Mins
Small Groups – 5 Mins
Group Discussion – 5 Mins
Media Portrayals
• Most of what you see in the media is fake.
• Surgeries
• Photoshop
• Airbrush
• Etc.
Media Portrayals
- Heidi Montag: MTV Reality Series -The Hills
- People Magazine (2010): “Addicted to Plastic Surgery”
2007
2008
Building Your Self-Esteem
Because Self-Esteem is a self reflection of
our decision (choice), we can improve
our self-esteem.
Accept Yourself
• Accepting yourself = best way to raise self-esteem.
• How? – Assess your strengths & weaknesses
• Don’t be modest. No one needs to know!
• Don’t compare strengths/weaknesses to others.
Accept Yourself
Understand:
– Everyone has different strengths/weaknesses
– You a going to be great in some areas
– You are going to be not-so-great in other areas
– NO ONE HAS IT ALL!
Use what you have, not worry about what you don’t.
Accept Yourself
• Don’t spend energy on improving things you can’t control.
• Work on developing new strengths/skills.
• The sooner you start accepting yourself, the sooner others will accept you (not a fake you).
Use Positive Self-Talk
• We are constantly talking to ourselves.
• Usually not verbally, but internally:
“I am an idiot.” “Why did I do that?”
“My hair is so frizzy” “I suck at shooting”
“I am so weak” “I am so fat”
“I can’t talk to that girl” “I am so stupid”
“I am going to fail anyway” “Why try?”
“My clothes suck” “I don’t have a good smile”
“I am so clumsy” “I have bad skin”
Use Positive Self-Talk
Positive Self-Talk: talking to yourself in a
positive way about your characteristics and
abilities.
Be Good at Something
• Everyone has something that they are good at.
• Playing guitar, singing, drawing, writing,
football, volleyball, basketball, making people
laugh, being a good friend, listener, reading,
leadership, etc…
• Make the most of it!
Be Good at Something
• If you do the things that you are good at,
you will build your confidence, thus your
self-esteem.
• If you know you are good at one thing, you
won’t be afraid or upset to try new things.
Use “I” Statements
It is easier to speak in “generalizations,” but
it does not allow you to…
• clearly state how you feel.
• take responsibility for your feelings.
• to communicate to others.
• improve your self-esteem (false understanding).
Develop a Support Group
Support Group: people in your life whom you
trust and with whom you are able to talk openly.
Self Disclosure: telling another person meaningful
information about yourself.
Develop a Support Group
Benefits of Support Group:
1. Time to Reflect On Yourself
2. Accurate Perceptions of What Others Think of You
3. Learn From Others
4. Share Same Thoughts/Fears/Triumphs
5. Better Appreciate Similarities/Differences
6. Greater Friendships
7. Increased Self-Esteem
IMPORTANT: 1st Build a relationship on trust and mutual respect before disclosing personal details of your life. Be careful of who you open up to.
Develop a Support Group
A support group can be…
1. A formal meeting of people who come
together with the purpose of support.
2. Informal gathering of people who share
experiences, thoughts, feelings, etc (most of
you will experience this).
Develop a Support Group
EXERCISE:
Write down 5 people who you think could
be included into your support group. Why?
Resist Peer Pressure
Low Self-Esteem Risk of Peer Pressure
- Lack of Confidence in Self
- Easily Influenced By Others
- Searching For Acceptance
Resist Peer Pressure
• Learning to Trust/Make Decisions for yourself Builds Confidence!
• When you act for yourself, you are the only one responsible for your decisions.
• Ownership can either hurt or improve your self-esteem (depending on what you do).
NOTE: You should still listen for advice, ideas, suggestions of trusted people, but still make your own choices!
Act With Integrity
• Once you appreciate yourself, you can
better appreciate the worth of other people.
• People w/high self-esteem look out for the
interest of other people.
• Self-esteem allows you to treat others
w/respect & compassion.
Act With Integrity
INTEGRITY: What you do, how you think,
or how you act when no one is watching
(or when you think no one is watching).
Are you the same person regardless of the
situation?
Act With Integrity
• People w/a low self-esteem are easily manipulated.
• People w/a high self-esteem would not manipulate.
ADDED BONUS: When people with high self-esteem encourage/build-up others, self-esteem is raised even further.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 1: Make a list of your good qualities and keep it with you at all times. Place extra copies on your mirror, in your locker, or other places you will see it. Read over the list on a regular basis and at any time when you experience negative thoughts.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 3: Seek new challenges in your life. Don’t
be afraid to try new things. Mastering a
new task or ability can build self-esteem.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 4: Avoid putting yourself down to others or
to yourself. Accept compliments with a
“thank you” and a smile.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 5: Find something that you do very well
and work to improve that skill.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 7: Accept the fact that neither you nor
anyone else is perfect. Avoid dwelling on
mistakes; laugh them off and continue with
the positive.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 8: Take a moment to look at yourself in the
mirror each day an give yourself a verbal
compliment.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 9: Keep yourself well groomed, maintain a
positive attitude, and develop a sense of
humor to handle difficult situations.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 10: Join at least one activity that involves
other people. Volunteer for service with an
organization or group in your school or
community.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 11: Associate with other positive thinkers
in your school and community. Create your
own support group of friends who are a
positive influence on you and your self-
esteem.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 12: Don’t fight a fact; deal with it. Try to
avoid thinking that people and things in
your life that are out of your control should
be different. They aren’t and that is the
reality.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 13: Accept that life does not have to be
perfect for you to be happy. Happiness is a
way of thinking; a content feeling, not
constant euphoria.
15 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem
# 14: Remember that sometimes bad things happen that are not within your control. Expect this and try not to let it set you back too much. Do the best you can to change what you can, and avoid dwelling on what you cannot change.