Wow! What an amazing

smashing crashing

start to the greatest

camp on earth.

It all started late at

night when we all

boarded some cool big

fancy busses with our

suitcases safely thrown

away in a big truck.

The few of us that

made it on time,

quickly got to know the

camp grounds so that

we won’t be caught off

guard later in the

summer.

We were introduced to

our counselor(s) who

were defiantly excited

to see that we made it

alive over the bridge.

We then got to see a

night activity with

schizophrenic NADDB.

That was the first

Chassunah which the

Chosson covered his

face and the Kallah

didn’t have her hair

done.

All week long our

counselors were very

busy marking how good

we played sports in

preparation for draft

day.

We had a IHE

with someone

who liked talking

with a closed

mouth. Really

funny!

Cocoa club started with

a bang, (ouch!) with

Itche Kadoozy and Jono

having their usual

conversations.

Finally at the end of

the week came Shabbos

with all the Chayus

associated with it!

To top it all off we had

Shmoyonkee! NADDB,

CMZ, CAL and PAMZB

had us rolling in corn

flakes for quite a while

and included a Chinese

Mexican and a lady.

The first full week of

camp started with the

announcing of the Soda

Sports League.

When we thought it

couldn’t get any better,

ICE-SKATING!

We went round and

round in circles until

we finally made it to

the ice rink!

After kicking everyone

out of the rink we

started ice-skating in

the water for a couple

of hours.

Then straight to the

park for a picnic and

around 30 games

played simultaneously.

It was an awesome day

never to be forgotten.

Suddenly, signs were

going up, something

was happening… A

Voch In Leibtzik!

Every bunk started

raking in the cash by

making cheers for their

bunk. Apparently

Leibtzik is a city with a

lot of the green stuff.

We all watched a video

of NADDB asking

people for a ride to

Antarctica and getting

the police on his case.

The greatest camp on

earth has officially

begun!

This Newsletter is called

A Tefach Hecher

because:

We are the greatest

camp in the world

We like the name

What else should we call

it?

It rhymes with Becher

which comes before the

newsletter is given out

We made a raffle, and

that’s the name that won

The chipmunks jump A

Tefach Hecher

How to turn off your

bunks PA

749

How to get

connections

1414

What the staff do

after lights out

613

How to cheat fairly 770

How the lake became

wet

718

Who is Alon Zaretzky 735

How to fight nicely 0458

Inside this issue:

My Boich S’vorois

א טפח העכערק פרשת בלק“שב Issue 1

מחנה גן ישראלב“קיץ תשע

ד“בס

Some of you are

wondering what

Debaga means, so

this week we decided

to try and find out a

little about this entity

we call Dbaga Bdaga.

ATH: When were

you born?

NADDB: Eight days

before my Bris.

ATH: Do you read

this newsletter?

NADDB: I can’t read English.

ATH: How do you prepare for

night activity?

NADDB: I eat sugar and make sure

to go to the bathroom beforehand.

ATH: As a night activity

director, what do you suggest

we should do to bring Moshiach

closer?

NADDB: Have Ahavas Yisroel,

especially to your night activity

director and also friends.

ATH: What do you do when your

not preparing for night activity?

NADDB: I give Mishi

mop a bath. Eat

f a r c h a n y u k t e h

Cholent and play

with my baby.

ATH: What’s your

babies name?

NADDB: He doesn’t

want one yet, I’m

trying to convince

him to get one.

ATH: So what do

you call him?

NADDB: My baby.

ATH: Are you also a learning

teacher?

NADDB: I am learning how to be a

teacher.

ATH: What’s your opinion on the

slavery in the cocoa fields in

Colombia?

NADDB: Cocoa sounds good to me.

ATH: A lot of kids seem to be

needing the bunk pass

desperately, what can we do to

stop the epidemic?

NADDB: Change the color of the

pass.

ATH: Which color?

NADDB: Yellow and green together,

it’s very confusing.

ATH: Any final words?

NADDB: Boo!

clouds. The clouds will then carry

the water to Africa where it can be

used to clean elephants.

The elephants would then support

the institute by simply being there

for the researchers to research.

So the next time you go on a bus

remember to take your sweater in

case there are elephants in Africa.

Researchers at the MEdical

inStitute of ice-Skating, otherwise

known as the MESS, have

concluded that a single slip on ice

contains more water than a drop of

water the poor people drink in

Africa. Therefore they suggest that

all ice-skaters should spend time in

the sun, which would hydronate the

water off their clothes, into the

Get to know your staff

The team at the MESS pose for a

group picture

Page 2 א טפח העכער

Most repeated song of the week:

PAMZO: “Ki Heim Chayenu, V’Oirech

Yameinu, V’Oirech Yameeeinu”

Caption describing picture or

graphic.

Dear Mommy and Tatty, Zaidy and

Bubby, Chaim and Uncle Shmuel,

Zelig Dov and Meir Anshel, Chaim

Tzvi and Yocheved Shprintza, Elte

Zeidy and Elte Zeidies mother, Bubbe

Hinda and Bubbe Yente, Bubbe Sarah

and Bubbe Chana Freida Shlita’s,

I just fell off the bus.

Love, Moshe Shmuel

P.S. My counselor said I was not

supposed to use his pen, so it took me

time to find a pen. When I found a pen

the pen didn’t have any ink so I

looked for another pen. I found a pen.

A letter to home

Moshe Shmuel outside the gas

station

raising the price for cups (with

no apparent difference in size),

he forces the public to buy

cones.”

Others have a more sinister

approach. “He’s scared of the

health department,” accuses

Gabrielle Croissant , Director of

Laundry Foldings. “There have

already been rumors that the oil

used for deep frying has been in

that machine since last year.

Word on the grape vine is that

the cups ordered by Akiva’s

Bagels Pty. Ltd. are of a cheaper,

more unsanitary quality. If he

raises the price, less people buy,

which reduces the chances of

being noticed by health

regulators.”

Were this to be the case, the

m o v e h a s b a c k f i r e d

sensationally, with the CCCC

swooping in just days after the

price change.

As to the true reason behind the

price hike, time will tell, with

the inquiry expected to take a

number of weeks.

The owner of Akiva’s Bagels,

who wishes to remain

anonymous, was unavailable to

comment.

By KG2 and KG1

An inquiry has begun by the

CCCC (Canadian Consumer

Code of Conduct) as to the

suspicious price hike in ice

cream sold by Akiva’s Bagels

Pty. Ltd. over the past week.

A representative of the

governing body has informed the

public that the action comes as a

result of repeated complaints by

a number of individuals.

Reports so far vary, with some

unions claiming that ice cream

cup prices have been raised by a

whopping 40%.

Conspiracy theories are already

circulating. “It’s because of the

cones,” claims Mishy Mop, CEO

of Bucket Enterprises. “He over

ordered them, and to recover

from excess stock, he is

manipulating the market. By

I Scream You Scream

“He’s scared of

the health

department...”

Issue 1 Page 3

This newsletter is

brought to you by the

dedicated staff of

Section B+

CSZ

CZG

CSK

CMG